Nur knew when she woke up that this morning would be the make or break event of her stay.
She checked her phone. No missed calls.
If Connor had taken his life, he hadn't tried calling her for help.
She sighed. Maybe some things were inevitable? She wondered if she could get through to Evan and try to prevent all the Connor Project stuff from getting out of hand. Come to think of it, she never got around to asking Connor if he even liked the orchard.
Deciding she should mourn Connor, Nur opted for a black long sleeve dress, and white tights. She found some beat up Vans and headed out the door, absentmindedly shouting to her parents she was going to take the bus.
She noticed a few students from yesterday when she stepped on the bus and walked down the aisle, though there was only one she really knew.
Nur tapped on Evan's shoulder. He snapped out of his reverie. "Can I sit with you?" She asked.
"Go ahead," he replied, moving closer to the window.
He wasn't looking at her, instead he was focusing on the left corner.
"So, ready for Bio?" Nur asked. "I think we're going to cover more on the parts of the cell."
"I'm not really into that, don't get me wrong, it's exciting…" Evan began.
"It isn't," Nur corrected.
Evan shrugged. "I guess. But I'm more interested in the ecology part of the course."
"That's not until the end of the year!" Nur exclaimed.
"I can wait," Evan replied. "I hope we cover plant biology, I'm really interested in botany. I spent the summer training to be a junior Ranger at a National Park."
"Wow! That's really cool," Nur said encouragingly. "Any fun stories, or are you sworn to secrecy?"
"Well," Evan said, his excitement now visible. "I was birdwatching and you wouldn't believe what I saw in a White Oak…"
Evan spent the rest of the bus ride talking about his time at the park. It wasn't particularly interesting in itself, but Evan's passion for nature made up for it. It was almost soothing in a way. Nur made sure to nod at the right moments and ask questions. Despite her initial boredom, she found the conversation growing on her.
She almost forgot about Connor.
As the bus pulled into the school, they gathered their things and headed inside.
"What are you doing with the new girl? Is she your girlfriend? Didn't know you were into terrorist types. Is that why you hang out with Murphy? Are you two going to blow up the school together?" Jared jeered as he stopped by to talk to Evan.
"I'll see you around," Nur said, waving goodbye.
"You don't have to," Evan responded. "Can you stay til Homeroom?"
"Oh? So she is your girlfriend? Do you like her? Is she gonna have to deck Zoe for your affections?" Jared continued.
"Shut up, Kleinman," Nur muttered.
"What was that? If you have something to say, say it to my face."
"Fine, shut up."
Jared glared at her. "Screw this, I'm out. See ya around, Hansen." Jared angrily latched on to his bag abd stomped away.
"Sorry," Nur apologized to Evan. "I know I was out of line, but he was getting on my nerves."
"Don't worry about it, that's just how he is, he'll come around." Evan replied nervously.
Nur nodded in understanding, and they talked while Evan switched out his books in his locker. They parted ways and she headed to Homeroom in time before the bell rang.
Connor wasn't there, and Nur's stomach felt like it was free falling.
Time crawled until the bell rang. The rest of the day was waiting.
She wondered if Connor's parents would show up.
She went to Bio, where she and Evan continued their conversation from this morning. There wasn't a group session today, so they sat next to each other in silence. Nur doodled on her notebook while Evan kept staring outside.
They parted ways at the end of class. "See you at lunch?" Nur asked.
"Really?"
"Sure, is that ok with you?"
"I…usually eat my lunch in the computer lab." Evan confessed.
"I didn't know they allowed that." Nur said. "We can do that if you'd like."
Evan agreed, and they parted ways.
At History, she asked to sit next to Alana, who said yes.
Nur asked Alana about her Summer, and her family. It was a nice, but general conversation. Honestly, it was a good enough place to start.
"Do you want to study together? I think it would be good to partner up and practice old exams, or go over dates." Nur suggested.
"That's a great idea! I'm pretty busy now with Homecoming, SAT prep, and all my volunteer organizations, but maybe we could try to meet up on Saturday?"
"Saturday's fine with me," Nur replied.
She handed Alana her phone and she texted herself the phone number.
The bell rang, and they settled into class.
One more class period, then lunch.
Nur waited for any announcement calling for Evan, nothing happened.
She accepted that maybe it was out of her hands as she started stuffing books in her locker.
"So, wanna head out again this afternoon?" Connor asked, leaning on the other lockers.
Nur gasped. "Jesus, don't sneak up on me like that. You'll give me a heart attack."
"Sorry," Connor mumbled. "But do you want to go?"
"I can't today, I promised I'd stay for lunch. And I can't skip, my parents freaked when they found out about yesterday." Nur replied, looking Connor in the face for the first time today. He looked tired, like he hadn't gotten much sleep the night before.
Connor snorted. "Told you. It feels bad the first few times, but you get over it."
"Can I hang out with you this afternoon, after school?" Nur offered. "My dad works til 6, and my mom's gone most of the evening."
"Yeah, that's fine. Do you want to head to the park?"
"I thought you were grounded? I can come to your house."
Connor looked at her quizzically. "It's your funeral."
"By the way, I never got your number yesterday," Nur commented. "How am I going to text you? Carrier pigeon?"
"Smoke signals?" Connor suggested.
"Telegraph?" Nur laughed.
Connor handed her his phone. It was a Samsung.
"Didn't take you for an Android guy," Nur mused as she typed in her number.
"They're better than whatever recycled crap Apple makes these days." Connor said.
"Oh, next year there's something in the news about how these phones keep exploding, something to do with the batteries." Nur commented as she handed back his phone
"I'll keep that in mind." Connor said, putting his phone in his shirt pocket. "What are you doing for lunch?"
"I'm eating in the computer lab with Evan Hansen? That kid with the cast? He's actually pretty nice."
"Really?" Connor asked in disbelief. "I'm not a fan of him saying all those weird things about my sister. Also, why the computer lab?"
"I guess it's quiet? Seems like he doesn't like loud spaces."
"Why don't you both eat outside? There are some tables behind the cafeteria, maybe I'll join you."
"Sure, I'll ask Evan if he's ok with that."
Connor gave a nod then adjusted his bag. "See ya."
Nur headed over to the computer lab to see Evan typing away intently. Perhaps he was finishing up a letter. "Hey."
Evan looked up. "Hey."
"I know it's a lot to ask, but would you mind eating outside today? The weather's nice, and this place is a bit small." Nur said. She did understand the desire to be here though. In her old life, she did spend a lot of time waiting in between classes in the computer lab, mostly because she needed to kill time and didn't have anyone to talk to.
"Um, sure. Give me a second to print this."
Nur heard the whir of the printer and watched as it ejected the page. "Do you want me to get that for you?"
"No! I got it." Evan rushed over and snatched the paper, folding it and putting it in his pocket.
"Did you get your food? I'm heading to the cafeteria, I just wanted to ask you first."
"I brought a sandwich." Evan said.
"Smart choice," Nur replied. "I'll test my luck with whatever's available here. Do you want to come with, or wait outside?"
"I'll come with you." They walked over to the cafeteria and Evan stood in line with her as she picked up a tray. She could tell he was already getting nervous in the large line. Nur tried to distract him, asking about what music he liked to listen to.
"I listen to a lot of Christian rock? Inspirational music mostly."
"Oh! I didn't know that, I like a lot of alternative stuff and musical theater, kind of boring really."
"I like musicals," Evan interjected. "I like The Music Man, and Guys and Dolls."
"Both classics." Nur agreed. "I'm also a huge fan of The Sound of Music and Grease." Nur was at the end of the line, and grabbed the last pudding. "Ok, all done here. I'll pay up and we can go." Evan waited with her while the attendant scanned her card, then they headed outside.
Connor was waiting at the table, Nur waved to him.
"Do you mind if Connor sits with us? He's really cool."
Evan looked alarmed. "Um, sure?"
"Took your long enough," Connor said as they sat down. "I thought you bailed."
"Sorry, the line was long. Do you guys know each other or do we need introductions?"
"Evan and I have been going to school together since preschool. I think we're past that stage." Connor said. He took the apple from Nur's tray and gave a nod to Evan. "Hey."
"Hey," Evan said quietly.
"I see you still have the cast."
"Yeah, thanks for signing it by the way." Evan replied.
Nur noticed for the first time Connor had signed the cast after all, just like he had the last time. She wondered if he still said the same 'pretend we both have friends' thing this time around.
"No problem," Connor said, taking a bite of the apple.
"Hey, if you're gonna take that, pay me back at least." Nur complained.
"You want it back?" Connor asked handing the half eaten, browning fruit back to her.
Nur sighed. "Keep it."
She looked at Evan, who was fidgeting. She hoped he wasn't scared.
"Did Evan tell you he spent the summer working at a National Park? Evan, why don't you tell Connor that cool story about the bird. I'm sure he'll be impressed with your forest expertise."
Ok, it was a bit much, but nether of them noticed. How could they? Evan started off, and Connor listened.
The conversation drifted here and there during the hour. Nur found out that Evan's mom worked in the same hospital as hers, and that Connor's dad was also a lawyer.
"My dad works as an attorney for the government," Nur commented.
"I think my dad does some sort of lobbying work for pharmaceuticals or something?" Connor replied. "I don't know the details but it's really boring and he's always working."
"My dad lives in Colorado," Evan commented.
"Oh? That's cool. I've never been out west," Nur replied.
Connor took the paper from her straw and was folding it in on itself in an accordion pattern.
"I'm going over to Connor's place to hang out after school? Do you want to join us?" Nur asked Evan.
Evan looked surprised. "I have homework."
"Rain check then?" Nur said encouragingly.
Evan nodded. "Yeah. And…you both are free to come over to my place. My mom's at work most of the time so we'd have the whole place to ourselves."
"I could bring a DVD, we could watch a movie or something. Do you guys like comedies or are you more into horror?"
"Definitely horror," Connor replied.
"Neither?" Evan answered.
"We'll figure it out later. But I always have Mean Girls on standby. Or Heathers." Nur said offhandedly.
They finished their lunch, then headed back inside. She waved goodbye to Evan and Connor and headed to Spanish.
Three more classes to go. Surprise, surprise, Jared Kleinman was there.
"Hey," She greeted him, mostly out of politeness.
"En Espanol por favor," Jared replied moodily.
"Whatever. I wanted to send the olive branch. Maybe we can hang out together sometime, you, me and Evan? Start from scratch?"
"Why would I want to hang out with a bunch of losers like you? I guess as the new kid you don't have much of a rep, but I kind of have a good thing going here." Jared protested.
Nur looked around. "Really? Who are your friends? I don't see anyone else."
"They're not here, obviously. Besides, Evan's so weird. I mean, it's fun getting a rise out of him, but it's hard to not get him to shut up about trees."
"Suit yourself." Nur replied. "But if you want to, you can always sit with us at lunch."
After her last class, Nur waited for Connor.
"Ready?" He asked as they made their way to the car.
"You know it!" Nur laughed. "I guess we'll have to make a pretense of doing homework too. I thought I'd get it done before, but I didn't get around to it."
"You should be careful, my parents will already be shocked to see me bring a friend over, homework might be too much for them to take."
"Oh! That reminds me, I'll call my parents and let them know I'm going to your place." Nur said. She quickly dialed her dad to let him know she made a new friend at school, and she'd be at their house the rest of the afternoon.
"Her name is Zoey, yes, she's really nice. No, you don't have to pick me up, she'll drop me home. Love you too Abba." She snapped the phone shut. "Ok, let's go."
They drove to Connor's house, one of the larger colonial style houses almost close to the embassies. Nur wasn't aware that anyone could live in those houses.
"Wow, you live here?" Nur asked.
Connor rolled his eyes. "It's not that great. It's like a 200 year old house and everything creaks. I swear I have a ghost living with me in my room."
The house was empty when they arrived.
"It's Tuesday, so I think my mom has SoulCycle or something." Connor said as he grabbed a soda. He handed it to Nur. "Do you want one?"
Nur accepted it and cracked it open. "Ok, where do you want to study? Is here good?"
They set their books on the granite countertop of the breakfast nook and sat on the barstools.
"I usually spend more time in my room, it's kind of weird being down here to be honest." Connor admitted.
"We can go up if you'd like."
"I don't have a desk, we'd have to study on my bed."
"We probably wouldn't fit, with all our books," Nur commented. "Also don't want to piss off the ghost."
"Hello! I'm back!"
Nur could hear a pleasant voice from the doorway.
As the footsteps increased, she found Connor's mother faced to face with them.
So this is the movie canon. Holy crap, that's Amy Adams.
"Hello, Mrs. Murphy. I'm Nur, Connor's friend from school." Nur stood up to greet her.
Connor's mother looked surprised. "Connor, I didn't know you were having anyone over. Nice to meet you, and please, call me Cynthia. Please, sit down. What are you two working on?"
"Algebra?" Nur replied nervously. Why was she looking at her so intensely? It was making her so uncomfortable.
"Algebra! Wow, that's great. Would you like to stay for dinner, Nur? I'm sure the rest of the family would love to meet you."
"Um, ok. I just have to call my parents and let them know."
When Cynthia left the room, Connor whispered, "You probably shouldn't stay, family dinners are kind of a shit show. Also my mom makes this weird vegan food, you wouldn't be into it."
"I don't mind, I want to stay if you'll let me."
Connor sighed. "Ok, but I did warn you."
They continued with their homework and finished about two hours later. Nur texted her dad, who said he would call later.
Around 7pm, Connor's dad (stepdad?) returned. He was nice enough, though he was equally surprised to see Connor finishing his homework.
"Glad to see you're taking an interest in your schoolwork for once."
"Hmm." Connor replied, ignoring him.
"I apologize for my son's rudeness, hopefully he hasn't been too much of a bother for you."
"Of course not, Connor's been a great friend. I would have been so lost without him." Nur said.
Larry nodded."I'll see you at dinner, buddy."
"See ya." Connor said, not looking at him.
Cynthia apologized as she entered the kitchen, hoping she wasn't bothering them.
"Do you need help with dinner, Mrs. Murphy, I mean, Cynthia?" Nur asked.
"No, it's fine. Why don't you two go to the living room, or upstairs? I'll call you when dinner's ready."
They headed up to Connor's room, which was a mixture of the show and the movie in terms of decor.
"It's cute," Nur said.
"Shut up, I know it's lame." Connor brushed off.
They sat on his bed and listened to music on his phone. Nur purposely didn't note the absence of a door.
When they arrived at dinner, Zoe was already at the table, so was Larry. The meal itself wasn't so bad. Vegan meatloaf and steamed veggies.
"So, what are your plans after graduation?" Larry asked Nur.
"Dad…" Connor protested
"What? I'm just asking."
"I'm applying Pre-med. My reach school is GW, but I'm also looking at George Mason and American." Nur declared.
"Staying local, I see." Larry said approvingly. "Cynthia and I met at Georgetown."
"Wow, that's nice." Nur said. Connor pushed his food around.
"Maybe you can convince Connor to apply himself a little more. Maybe you can look over his essays."
Connor stood up. "I'm full." He rushed out of the table and headed upstairs.
"Connor!" Nur got up to follow him.
"Hey, are you ok?" Nur asked as she followed Connor to his room.
"I don't know, why don't you ask my parents? They seem to like you more than me, why don't you go down there and talk to them!" Connor shouted.
"Because I don't care about them - I'm here for you. And who cares what they think? College isn't that important. I can tell you now, by senior year I'll end up having burnout and so much stress. I'm not even sure if I graduate by the end of it. I failed all my classes, I barely could get out of bed by the end of it. You shouldn't do something because other people want you to, you should do what makes you happy. I wish I had figured that out." Nur said bitterly.
"Well, it's not too late." Connor replied.
"No," Nur said, looking at him. "I guess not."
She felt her phone buzz.
"It's my dad, I got to take this."
Nur stepped outside Connor's room.
"Hey, Dad. Yeah, I'm still at Zoe's. I'll be home soon. Ok, love you, bye."
"It's kind of weird you're lying to your dad about hanging out with me, considering we don't even know each other." Zoe chimed in.
"Oh, hey." Nur blushed. "Yeah, my parents are kind of strict, they don't want me to have friends that are guys."
"Lying about it isn't going to help," Zoe replied. She paused. "Why are you hanging out with Connor anyway? He's so…"
"I like him, he accepted me when no one else did. He reminded me I wasn't alone." Nur replied simply.
"That doesn't sound like him." Zoe said curiously.
Maybe it isn't? Maybe I'm imagining this?
"Maybe I see a different side of him?" Nur mused. "Anyway, it's late, I better head back. See you around?"
"Yeah," Zoe replied. "I guess so."