Chapter 12: T.A. 2790 – Memories are not what the Heart desires
"What, in Durin's name, are you doing here?"
Dis dropped both, the broom and the pitchfork, before she hurried over to have a look out of the door. There was nothing she was less in need of, than another surprise in this early morning, but there was no sign that there would be another for a while.
Lord Fundin was still debating with her father's maidservant, and she waved him a good morning, before she closed the door again and before she turned round to stare at her visitor again.
Still, she was not willing to believe her eyes, and yet it was true. Standing in front of her, surrounded by hay and straw, covered in dust and husk, stood no one less than the elvenking himself, dressed not in brocade, silk and satin, but in linen and leather and wrapped in a heavy woollen cape.
She would not have sworn an oath on it, but she was sure, that there was a hint of amusement gleaming within his eyes when he beheld her.
He was the one to regain his countenance a bit earlier and he hinted a bow, while he gave her a smirk: "This was not supposed to happen, young daughter of Thrain!"
"What do you mean", she asked, furrowing her brow: "That we would meet here?"
"No! That was supposed to happen. I just did not plan to give my cover away. Honestly, you caught me by surprise!"
"I can assure you: You caused me the same experience."
"Forgive me, if I scared you, princess, but this disguise serves a purpose and I ask you, not to give this secret of mine away."
"If that is, what the Lord of Greenwood demands from me, then I say, be at ease, my lord; that I can do for you."
Thranduil sat down on one of the hay bales that they were at eye height and looked straight into her eyes: "It didn't remain hidden to me what occurred to your grandfather. I know, that it got denied to you to bury him the way the traditions of your people demand it..."
Dis lowered her head, but it did not escape him, that there was an unexpressed pain within her eyes. Not sure what the true reason was, he went on: "It also got to me that your father prepares for war..."
The young dwarf woman lifted her gaze and replied: "Yes! He'll have war! That is, why you won't meet him. He is away to summon the clans and to call them to arms."
"Then I am too late. My hope was to talk the king out of this."
"Not all of our kin thought that it would be wise to seek for revenge, but he would not listen..."
They kept silent for a while, until Dis asked: "Was this the only reason, you went to Dunland for? You must have been aware that you might fail."
"Actually", Thranduil replied with a slight smile while he got up: "I tried to find you, because I still owe you a story, if not two."
The dwarrowdam stopped short for a split second, then she let out a heartfelt laugh. "How is this", she asked: "I never heard that elves were known for their sense of humour."
He cocked an eyebrow: "Be assured, there is much you never learned about my kind so far."
"I tend to believe you!" Dis nodded: "But what a bad host I am! You must be hungry and thirsty from the ride."
"The needs of an elf compared to your kind are different, means in my natural shape I'd not long for food and drink for now, but I guess I'll have to give in to the needs the ranger from the north might have at this hour of the day. So, yes, I'll follow your invitation. Just don't be scared if it won't be me, you'll see at your table..."
He wasn't able to finish his last thought, when the door got pushed open and Lord Fundin's impressive head came into sight: "Oho, I was too rash telling you that none of the Durin's would be around to talk to. I see, you already came to know my lord and king's daughter."
"She caught me in here, finding that I got a bit too curious for a stranger. Forgive me again."
Dis swallowed hard when he turned round and when he seemed to look...different. The knowledge that he was still behind this rather unfamiliar sight didn't make it easier. She needed to remind herself that there was a reason why he travelled in this shape.
Neither her father nor her eldest brother would have listened to him if he'd have called on them as the king of Mirkwood.
"You come straight from the east?"
Thorin spooned his soup and dipped some fresh bread into it, while he beheld the dark haired stranger sceptically sitting vis-a-vis from him at the table.
"From the north-east, yes! From Laketown..."
"Laketown!" Thorin nodded musing about it for a moment. He exchanged a quick look with his brother and sister and asked: "Then there is still life in Esgaroth?"
"Many of those who took flight from Dale sought shelter with the men of the lake. The town grew and declined within the same breath."
"How is this? One should assume that they would find a way to survive."
"Not much trade is left, since...the dragon came. The Woodland Realm slips more and more into isolation..."
"Thorin smirked: "Why am I not surprised?"
An almost unnoticeable twitch of his cheek was the only movement which gave away, that there was more about this ranger than the eye was able to see.
It was Frerin who asked: "What about Dale and...Erebor?"
"I'm afraid I can't tell you anything new, except that Dale lies completely abandoned now. Some wanted to return, but when the dragon sneaked out of the mountain in the dark hours of the night to hunt for prey amongst the few who stayed in the city of men, even the last got aware, that there was no living any more." Thranduil, in the shape of Othar, the ranger from the north, looked at the three young dwarves and went on: "I wished, there were better news I could tell you, but the truth is: Not much is left of what was once glorious."
"What about the dwarves of the Iron Hills", Dis asked: "Isn't Nain willing to help the men of the lake?"
"The dwarves of the Iron Hills do as the elves of Mirkwood do. They stay in their halls. The men of the lake will sooner or later become inhabitants of a dying city."
Thorin pushed the empty bowl aside and remarked: "There is nothing in our power to prevent this. Look at us! The proud people of my folk got brought low. We have nothing to give." He shook his head, slowly and deliberate: "May the elves deal with this for now..."
"It might be that the Woodland Realm won't be able to help either..."
"I couldn't care less! All I owe to the elves of Mirkwood is being grateful for saving the lives of my sister and brother. That is much and it will do for a lifetime!"
Thranduil in his disguise inhaled a deep breath and decided once more not to reply to Thorin's sarcastic words. Instead, he said: "Lord Fundin, who granted me shelter the night before, told me, your people prepare for war..."
"That is true", Frerin said: "The way, Thror died...not only the dwarves of our kin will answer to this."
"You'll pay an immense toll of blood..."
"It is not my decision to make", the young dwarf replied.
"What if you'll be forced to answer to your father's call for war?"
"I'm still too young..."
"Never forget, young son of Thrain, you don't have to go to war for to die in battle."
"We'll fight if we have to", Thorin threw in.
"Even, if that would mean to leave your sister behind?"
"That, master Dunedan, should be nothing of your concern."
"Thorin..." Dis looked at her brother and shook her head.
"Don't you worry, sister, I have no doubt, that our guest will know how to get my words right. Being a ranger of the north he'll have heard much worse, I guess. Many people do not trust him and those of his kind. Close lipped grim warriors, they are, who avoid getting engaged and involved in disputes, but always having a watchful eye on the goings-on. Only a few know, who they really are."
"Our number is shrinking, indeed! The more we worry about Middle Earth and its people."
Dis smirked! It was not easy to keep silent about the secret her guest kept hidden from her brothers, but at the same time she admired how easily he replied to Thorin's and Frerin's questions. Of course he knew about the history of this world and its people. His eyes had seen more than she was able to imagine and she was convinced that not everything he ever had witnessed just had been pleasant.
She placed a jug on the table and some mugs, then she grabbed her cape and said: "I'll leave you to the target of your discussion and go to look after the animals before I'll retire..."
Greeting her guest with a nod, she left and went over to the stables.
"I should not have demanded this from you! It was very selfish."
Dis turned round when she heard his voice behind her.
Moonlight silvered his hair – he was all himself again.
"You don't have to excuse to me. You heard my brother!"
"That I did! He'll become a proud leader of your kin one day."
"I just fear he might become bitter." She intertwined her fingers and untangled them again: "We are not like you; we'll pass away within a wink of an eye. So, becoming bitter, does not sound wise to me."
"Tell me, young princess, do you still carry your memories with you? In here?" Thranduil's hand covered his heart.
"Yes! I do! I still consider it the safest place. What about you? Do you?"
"Yes..."
"Will you answer me a question, Thranduil Elvenking?"
"That, daughter of Durin, will depend on your question."
Dis leaned back against one of the trees, her gaze lost somewhere on the horizon: "How are you able to endure all those memories of yours? Don't they overwhelm you sometimes?"
Thranduil went down on one knee in front of her as he had done it once when he had met her for the first time within one of the many corridors of Erebor. A smile enlightened his eyes and it seemed as if they would reflect the moonlight when he finally gave her his reply: "They do, princess; more often than you may assume. It might surprise you, but elves feel as deeply as any other folk you may know. All we do is expressing those feelings in a much different way than you do. Many memories I carry with me, cause me a deep inwardly pain, but I won't let anyone know."
"Are you not afraid that it will tear you apart one day? It says your kind can die from a broken heart..."
"That is true, but to die from a broken heart requires to lose your zest for life as well; even for an elf."
"I'm glad to hear, you're still not tired of life..."
He cocked his head and looked at her a bit puzzled: "Why should I? My heart does not long for death, it desires life. And my kin desires a strong leader."
Dis didn't give him a reply. Instead, she reached out to tuck a strand of his hair back behind his ear and placed her hand on his cheek as she had done it before many years ago: "Give Mahal's grace that my brother will see you one day like I see you."
Thranduil wasn't able to hide another smile. This young dwarrowdam owned a disarming way to speak her mind – just as her brothers – and he had no doubt that these siblings would become strong leaders of their kin as well.