Hell in a Crapbasket
Episode 2, Luxuria: Level 3
"Fall back, they've breached through!"
"AAAAAAH! MY LEG!"
Following the aftermath of the riots, things had gone further down the drain for Luxuria Proper's inhabitants as the wave of feral demons had flooded the burning ruins. The fighting between the authorities and the would-be insurgents had quickly taken a backseat as everyone began to fight for survival.
Out of all of the survivors, it was the Horny Police, underfunded and understaffed as they already were, that handled the crisis the worst. Their arsenal, intended more to subdue than kill, was quite simply not suited for fighting off a coordinated feral demon attack, and it began to show in their mounting casualties and increasingly more desperate resistance.
The sounds of battle echoed from every corner of the city, and it seemed that no place was safe… except for the rich district which was surprisingly intact. Possibly because of the various private security forces that kept things in order, mostly by shooting anything that looked too poor or bloodthirsty to be there.
Through this chaos, two humans and a demon tried to carve a path for themselves. The smell of smoke, blood, sweat, and burning flesh coalesced into an unbearable stench, but they persevered.
An imp went flying into a pile of flaming rubble, its chest caved in. With another swing, more of the offending ferals found themselves at the business end of Alien's mace. It was downright massive, but his arms kept swinging as if it weighed nothing, shattering bones and flesh alike. Slowly but surely he kept advancing, like a boulder splitting a river.
To a more attentive eye, though, he wasn't doing well. His chest heaved, his clothes and skin torn by scratches and blistered by unholy fire. Yet another fireball careened towards him, singing his side. The impact was followed by the triumphant screech of its caster, but with a wordless roar, Alien batted aside the unfortunate imp.
By that point, several ferals had realized melee wasn't going to work. They all aimed, ready to put him down in a flurry of cursed flame. Just as the first imp in the line was readying a fireball, though, it found its arm falling to the ground. The resulting screech of pain was silenced by a flash of steel.
In short order, each of the imps had found their end by the edge of Sloth's saber. The man didn't waste time, weaving between demons, cutting ligaments and tendons, crippling everything he came close to. He was like a gale blowing through the battlefield, in some cases even appearing to be in two places at once.
For his part, Sloth was focusing on not getting hit. He didn't consciously pay attention to what he hit with his blade, so long as he hit something. And hit he did, continuously scoring grievous wounds on anything close.
His concentration faltered when he spotted something closing in on them. Tall, muscled, pig face-
He couldn't finish the thought before a squeal of pain came from all the demons around him. They writhed on the ground in agony, everything was forgotten except for their suffering.
A Pinky tried to grasp his leg but found its hand impaled to the ground by a pen. A gloved hand grasped one of its horns, pulling up its head. It squealed as its hand was torn apart by the sudden movement. Then it stilled, a loud squelch mixed with a crunch coming from behind it.
The hand let it go, allowing the corpse to fall to the ground and revealing Pandemonica behind the demon, holding a bloody, still-beating heart in her hand.
"It has been far too long since I was last able to… let loose like this." She uttered gleefully, right before crushing the heart between her fingers. "It's exhilarating."
The demoness' eyes shone with something dangerous the whole time she spoke, and Sloth was somewhat unsure of who he should be afraid of. He hazarded a quick look at the Hell Knight- Knights! Plural!
"We've got Hell Knights incoming!" Sloth yelled over the screams of the still-agonizing demons.
"Cambians!" Pandemonica corrected.
Sloth didn't answer, choosing that discretion was the better part of valor and high-tailing it out of there.
"What the fuck, Sloth!" Alien tried to call, but it only came out as a hoarse cough. His vocal cords felt on fire… he didn't remember screaming that much. Rather than talking again, Alien simply pointed Pandemonica in Sloth's direction.
"What are you trying to do?" Asked Pandemonica, a hostile edge in her voice.
He didn't answer, instead meeting the first Hell- no, the first Cambian, head-on. He swung down, and it blocked with an arm. The demon stumbled back a moment but regained its footing easily. It threw back Alien's weapon, and him with it.
Alien skidded on the ground, thankfully still on his feet.
"They're tough. Even armed, I'm no match. If we were all here, then maybe…" He moved out of the way of a fireball, his line of thought abandoned. "I just need to buy some time."
"We can't hold this position forever, I can handle whatever comes my way but you two won't be able to keep the pace up!" Pandemonica yelled before zapping one of the Cambians with her usual spell, causing it to start spasming in agony before gradually going still as its heart stopped.
Alien could recognize the truth in those words. Compared to Pandemonica, he was an underwhelming fighter at best, and a liability at worst. He could recognize that. Hell, he was terrible when compared to the first Cambian they fought! But he'd rather bite his tongue off than admit it out loud.
"I suppose I am getting a bit too tired… fine, let's catch up and get the others."
The two ran after Sloth, a veritable torrent of magic flooding the way behind them.
"Both of you get behind me!" Pandemonica yelled out, turning to the tidal wave of ferals.
"What, why?!"
"JUST DO IT!"
The trio stopped their escape and observed as blood-red esoteric symbols filled the air around them in every direction. In a blink, the symbols flung themselves at the horde still approaching.
All the while this was happening Pandemonica kept chanting in an alien language that neither of the humans could comprehend, although they could feel the sheer weight behind each word.
The runes didn't seem to have any outward effect at first, but as soon as the last demon was marked, they began to glow. The road was filled with cries and screeches, pain and terror overtaking the ferals' simple minds. One by one, their eyes rolled into the back of their heads as blood poured from every hole in their heads. Then, with one final gurgle, they fell limp to the ground.
A moment of silence passed. Sloth was the first to recollect himself.
"What the absolute fuck did you just do?"
"I popped every major blood vessel in their brains… however little they had of those." Pandemonica swayed unsteadily as she walked away from the carnage. Her foot caught on some debris, messing up her precarious balance and sending her to the ground.
Except she didn't fall to the floor. Instead, she found herself swept up by a pair of arms. Alien shifted her around a bit so that he could hold her in one arm, while the other held his mace. In any other circumstance, she might've objected to that, but she felt too drained to bother. Thus, she just leaned into his shoulder and gave them directions.
Another flash of green fire came from their five o'clock, accompanied by a porcine screech.
"Oh, screw that!" Sloth muttered, beginning to run once again.
###
"Take your time and aim, this ain't a competition on who can empty their mag the fastest!" Cletus yelled to Ralts as the two sat behind the makeshift barricade with the other members of the impromptu insurrection and fired into the approaching horde.
"This thing kicks like a mule!" Ralts complained as he stopped firing to massage his bruised shoulder. "Also I don't think aiming matters at this point considering that everything's a target."
Feral demons were everywhere at that point, only three things stopping them from tearing apart the insurrection along with Ralts and Cletus: the barricade, which was holding up well; the hail of gunfire, which had no intention of stopping; and Modeus, who was running around with her sledgehammer and breaking the knees of anything dumb enough to approach.
"I mean, fair enough but you'll get plenty more splat for your bang if you aim for the vitals instead of firing wildly and giving them a mere flesh wound," Cletus explained as he took down another Pinky. He went to shoot another demon, but his weapon clicked, demanding more bullets. "Reloading!"
"Gotcha!"
As Ralts resumed firing, Cletus had to take a moment to remove the magazine from his brand new assault rifle, which seemed to be some variant of AR-15.
He didn't know for sure who the manufacturer was - or why there were Earth guns in Hell, to begin with - considering there were no proof marks on the weapon beyond a serial number. Regardless, it was a reliable weapon that allowed for plenty of pimping out and that was what mattered at the moment.
Thankfully both his general gun knowledge and previous experience with an airsoft version of the platform allowed him to quickly find his way around the weapon.
As the minutes went by, it seemed like the horde was beginning to thin out slowly but surely. In fact, they were doing so well that Modeus took a few moments to catch her breath, intervening only when a big threat like a Cambian would appear.
"Don't let up! We'll see the end of them soon!" An incredibly burly demon loudly encouraged over the sound of his minigun. They didn't know his name, but he became the self-appointed leader of the demons as soon as the shit hit the fan, and for good reason as the other demons responded with a roar as they redoubled their efforts.
A bang came from the rear, and a few seconds later a loud thud echoed out as a massive ball of flesh fell from the air, crushing a few imps.
"Isn't that a Cacodemon?" Cletus asked rhetorically as he watched the still twitching form of the red ball of death, now filled with fresh bullet holes all over its body.
"Looks like it."
"You humans have weird naming conventions." One of the more humanoid demons next to them commented as he finished loading his rifle and resumed firing.
A green fireball whizzed by, Modeus ducking just in time for it to pass over her head. The smell of burnt hair reached her nose.
"Oh c'mon, I cut it yesterday…" She complained while slamming her hammer into the offending Cambian's midsection. It doubled over, and she quickly twirled around to slam it into the ground.
Several rounds from Ralts' L1A1 quickly put an end to the thing's suffering as they impacted its head and sent chunks of its cranium flying.
Seeing as the demon was handled, she turned to put some distance between herself and the horde. A series of voices from the barricade yelled at her to get out of the way, but she wasn't fast enough to dodge. A massive blow to her head sent her sprawling to the ground, the sledgehammer flying out of her hands.
Cletus and Ralts focused fire on the demons crowding around her, trying to buy her some time, but for every demon that fell two more seemed to take their place. Eventually, she was dragged away, hidden among the horde.
That's when they saw it.
A massive, pink-skinned Cambian walked out of the horde, seemingly ignoring the bullets thrown at it. The horde stilled at its arrival, all staring at it.
In a very human manner, it seemed to grin with glee as it continued its unstoppable advance. It stopped in front of the barricade, peering down to everyone hiding behind it. The scene felt very familiar to Ralts, but he couldn't quite place his finger on it.
"I will admit," it began, its deep voice carrying easily to everyone. "You lot have put up a much better fight than most. But it is time to end this farce."
It took a few steps back much to the confusion of the defenders before rolling one of its shoulders in preparation. "Rejoice, for you will have the honor of dying at the hand of The Baron."
It soon dawned on many what the giant feral was about to do and they resumed firing on it with twice the vigor. Someone even decided that now would be the perfect time to use the single rocket launcher that the defenders had at their disposal.
Neither Cletus nor Ralts knew why a gun store would have military ordnance like a rocket launcher, but they just chalked it up to Hell being really loose on regulations.
As the smoke from the explosion cleared, it quickly became clear that it was all for naught, as no amount of lead or explosions could stop the momentum of over one and a half tons of muscle. It barreled through the barricade as if it were made of paper, and not concrete, steel, and plastic. It ground to a halt in the middle of the former barricade, its hooves leaving deep indents into the road.
Everyone stared at the titan who stood among them, reveling in their terror and awe.
Unfortunately, this was no cartoon or movie, so it didn't waste much time in doing villain monologues and instead snatched the first demon its claws could reach and chomped the head off the unfortunate soul before they could so much as scream.
Everyone else did scream for their lives. All except for one minigun-wielding demon, who opened fire on the Baron of Hell. He simply roared in defiance as the minigun's barrels gradually began to overheat.
The Baron stood there, not looking particularly impressed as the bullets ricocheted off the thick skin. Although, it did seem to feel the impacts, as its head was pushed back a bit with every hit.
Eventually, when the weapon melted to the point that its rotary mechanism jammed, the demon wielding it simply tossed it to the ground and cracked its knuckles.
The Baron's eye ridge rose a bit at seeing the demon's wordless challenge. Still, it threw to the ground what remained of the corpse in its hands. "Make this interesting would you?" It asked with painfully fake politeness. "It's been a while since I had worthy opponents."
"I'll try not to disappoint."
With those words, the two titans charged at each other.
Meanwhile, more ferals began to pour in from the breach. What was before a coordinated effort quickly turned into a chaotic scramble for survival, bullets going everywhere as demons and ferals alike were torn apart.
"Shit went south way too fast!" Cletus yelled as he used both hands to smash an imp across the face with a field shovel that he managed to appropriate from amongst the surplus gear within the store.
Ralts finished slotting a bayonet into his rifle, just in time to stab an imp as it tried to lunge at him. He struggled to push the limp corpse off of him, only for more ferals to approach. Cletus held them at bay, swinging around the shovel just as he'd seen Modeus do with her sledgehammer… though without an ounce of her grace.
"What is your name, whelp?" The feral asked as it locked arms with its opponent.
"Darius." The other demon grunted.
"Darius… I'll be sure to remember that when I feast on your carcass." The feral grinned even further.
"In your dreams, bacon." Darius spouted before spitting in his opponent's face and headbutting him.
"Good, I like it when my meals put up a struggle." The old Cambian said before it responded with a brutal uppercut that sent its opponent flying backward.
###
"RRAAGH! Where is Modeus when we need her the most?!" Cletus yelled as he smacked the edge of the shovel's blade hard against an imp's collar, causing it to fall backward and onto the blood-stained ground before finishing it off with a hit right through its forehead.
"I think we oughta worry about ourselves right now!" Ralts argued as he shot a Pinky in the mouth. He then turned his sights towards another feral and went to pull the trigger again.
It clicked.
"Oh, for fuck's sake! Reloading!"
"Don't worry I'll cover you!" Cletus reported as he put the shovel away and started unloading his weapon, single-fire as to conserve ammo and keep the recoil manageable.
Ralts plucked a new magazine from the bag he'd slung over his shoulder and attempted to replace the spent one. He fumbled around, hands shaking too much to be accurate or fast. He couldn't reload in time when he heard a roar quickly approaching.
Cletus heard it too, but was being kept too busy by the other demons to turn around. He could only hope that Ralts would handle it.
And handle it he did… although in an unorthodox manner, as he threw his rifle like a javelin, getting lucky and piercing through the imp's neck and pinning it to the ground.
Every part of Ralts' already weak body was aching at this point, even standing up was a struggle. But still, he fought to get back on his feet and pull out a sidearm. The very same sidearm that he had been entrusted with as his first weapon.
The pistol felt like lead as he strained to lift it, his arms ready to give out. But he had to keep going. Everyone was giving it their all, even Cletus for all of humans being weaker than any demon, he kept going! So why couldn't he?
Why did he always have to be the one that was saved? He wasn't a burden!
"C'mon, go get your weapon back, I'll cover you!" Cletus encouraged him along as he quickly loaded a fresh magazine into his weapon, something which had almost become pure reflex at this point for him. "We ain't dead yet."
They were still alive, yeah… right? So they had to keep fighting.
Then why would his own body betray him like that? Why did he have to collapse at the slightest difficulty?
"Ralts, stay with me, buddy! This ain't no time to zone out!" Cletus said as he noticed his friend wasn't moving and slapped him lightly on the back before he resumed firing.
He wasn't alone. Right. He had a chance to live, to thrive. And those ferals were roadblocks to that goal. Now, if he could fucking move!
"There ya go, baby steps!" Cletus encouraged him along as he made his way towards the weapon, still stuck pointing towards the sky as it remained impaled in the throat of an - at this point - very much dead imp.
Getting distracted was a terrible mistake, as a sphere of green fire hurtled towards Cletus' midsection faster than he could realize. The man was sent sprawling to the ground, his friend's entire upper body had been engulfed in unholy flames that he desperately tried to put out.
And the screams… Ralts didn't know a person could scream like that, but it was the kind that shook him to his very core. There seemed to be no end to it as the fire showed no signs of dying out no matter how much Cletus rolled around.
All he could do was watch, unable to do anything.
The demons seemed to have stopped their onslaught, simply looking as Cletus kept wailing.
First, it was only one. Then two, three, and so many more began to laugh maniacally like a bunch of hyenas. Barely more than animals, but they understood pain…
...And they reveled in it.
Something deep and primal within Ralts broke alongside the floodgates.
He wanted those things to stop laughing at his friend's suffering. They did not deserve to live. He did.
He wanted to stop being helpless. They didn't deserve the power granted to them. He wanted it.
He wanted them to stop existing. He would make it so.
In an instant, the malicious laughter stopped, as a ripple coursed through the air. The first ferals in the horde stumbled, falling to their knees. The others soon followed.
Soon, shoutings of fear and confusion began to spread as their energy was sapped away. Then, they couldn't even cough as their bodies slowly began to wither away into naught but ash.
Ralts' body began to heat up as more and more demons collapsed. It was a pleasant feeling. He wanted more. He could feel his perception expand, some kind of sixth sense taking in the presence of any being around him.
More and more feral demons collapsed, fueling the aura slowly forming around Ralts. His body felt more energetic than it had in years!
He stood up with ease, observing the white flame-like aura following his movements. It was then that he was reminded of why this had even happened.
The flames on Cletus' body had finally died out, but the scene left behind was downright horrifying. His face had burned so badly that the skin had melted off, exposing parts of his skull, and his eyes had turned milk-white, any hair on top and in the front had completely burnt off. The clothes had partially melted into his body… what remained of it.
His chest was practically nonexistent, his ribs out in the open and even the organs were slightly singed.
And yet, he was still breathing somewhat.
He could not speak, what remained of his vocal cords having been burnt to a crisp. But he was definitely in agony as evident by his ragged and desperate breathing.
As if responding to his will, the white flames covering Ralts leaped to cover Cletus' massive wounds. The flesh began to grow back slowly, as if it were burning in reverse.
While Ralts observed Cletus' recovery, someone else had taken notice of it.
###
The Baron dodged Darius' fist, grabbing it and flinging him away. "Enough games," it muttered, moving towards the small human. If he could take down a horde in mere seconds, then he needed to be eliminated immediately.
It could still feel the lingering effects of some of its essence having slipped out of its body. It would need to recover soon, but for now, it would finish what it started.
It was a few steps away from the maggot when he finally spotted it. He scrambled away like the insignificant insect he was, ending up with his back to the wall. The Baron could feel its power beginning to slip again, no doubt courtesy of the maggot, but it was inconsequential.
It raised a fist, ready to crush the insolent pest when white flashed across its vision. It barely had time for its eyes to widen before with a mighty blow, the demon known as Modeus sent it flying away.
Ralts could only watch in shock as Modeus appeared out of nowhere and sent the feral demon flying through a building. Some of her hair was burnt, her clothes were torn apart and she was covered in blood from head to toe, but still, she stood tall and smiled. Like a vengeful angel, coming to smite their foes.
He had to admit that it was pretty hot.
###
"What's that in the distance?"
"Looks like a bloodbath to me, but then again that's the whole city."
"I meant the pile of debris in the middle of the street." Sloth deadpanned. "It looks deliberate."
"Looks to me like it's a barricade of some sort."
"Think it's worth checking?"
"Might be survivors there."
"Your friends are there," Came a certain demon's comment. She was still sitting in the crook of Alien's arm.
"How do you know?" Asked the man holding her.
In response, the demoness simply flicked her tail around.
"Right, demonic radar stuff." He then blinked. "Hold up, weren't you the one to say that it's hard to keep track of us since we're so feeble to your senses?"
"Modeus is there. It's bound to mean something."
"That can mean plenty of things honestly." Sloth said pessimistically.
"Let's not start speculating on the worst scenarios just yet." Alien cut any further conversation off before he began walking towards the barricade in question.
As they approached, they found a massive hole in the barricade. Inside though, was a group of demons cheering. And next to them, sitting on the ground, were Ralts, Cletus, and Modeus. Both men were asleep, while Modeus was keeping her guard up.
"Damn, what happened here?"
Plenty of gazes turned their way in response, including Modeus'.
"We fought off a massive wave of them, but not as many of us might have survived if it weren't for…" The young heiress explained as she gazed towards the sleeping duo.
Pandemonica's gaze turned to Ralts. "What did he do? He has an actual presence now."
"I'm not certain, but it seems he was… awakened by something that happened during the battle. One moment I was fighting to get back to them, and the next a wave of energy swept over everything, killing them where they stood." She frowned. "Well, not really killing them as much as draining their life away. It was that same energy that he used to heal… Cletus, was it?"
Alien approached the sleeping men, noticing how Cletus' beard was missing, along with the rest of his hair.
"I suppose we'll need to wait for them to wake up before getting any answers."
###
The terrified screeching of the last remaining imp was cut short by the bark of a shotgun blowing half its head into oblivion as it tried to run away from the being responsible for massacring the rest of its kin, leaving only said being as the sole living thing left standing within the entire city block.
Calmly and methodically, Doomguy - as the other men in Hell called him, he had to admit that the name grew on him a bit - reloaded his shotgun, taking a moment to appreciate the satisfying sounds. One didn't think about relaxing when exterminating hordes of demons, but that… did put a smile on his face.
He still had sand stashed away in any and all crevices of his armor, which annoyed him to no end, but at least he'd made sure that his guns functioned properly. Wandering for a whole day through the massive desert that made up this circle of Hell was… actually pretty tame compared to some of the things he had to do in the army, but it still wasn't a walk in the park: feral demons were everywhere.
At one point all the demons seemed to converge towards a certain direction, and that was where he found a massive city… or what remained of one, as several places appeared to have either been set on fire, carpet-bombed, or something powerful threw a hissy fit of epic proportions.
Any of those possibilities was worth investigating, thus he'd made his way into the city, which the ruined gates revealed to be called 'Luxuria'.
...That explained the naked dead bodies. Which weren't exactly a pleasant sight. He forced down a shudder as those awful days resurfaced when he had nothing but weird stun guns and sex toys for weapons to fend off the hordes coming after him.
He hoped he wouldn't have to deal with Lust demons like Imp-Tan anymore after that experience, but of course, nothing ever went right in Hell.
It wasn't the first time he'd seen demonkind fight amongst itself, if anything provoking infighting was one of his more commonly used strategies whenever he needed to save on ammunition, but this situation still felt different in his mind.
He certainly hadn't seen examples of demons using firearms before, humans possessed by demons sure, but not demons themselves. The Cyberdemon was the only exception to that rule and that thing had been purposefully augmented with a rocket launcher by the UAC.
Beyond that though, demon infighting was scattered and usually came in the form of individual demons fighting to the death, not wholescale slaughter like this. It must've been masterminded by something. Another Spiderdemon?
No, it couldn't be: those things would have made this whole ordeal more organized than just a massive free-for-all. It might have been an actual challenge rather than just another one of his daily hunts.
A crash rang out from somewhere above him, and he moved just in time to dodge the debris as something smashed through the building next to him.
Doomguy readied his shotgun, aiming for the gaping hole in the wall. Whatever had crashed through was big, bigger than any of the demons he'd seen in the fray so far.
The pile of debris shifted, some pink becoming visible through the rubble. Then, with a heave, the rubble was flung away, revealing the massive form of a demon Doomguy was irritatingly familiar with: a Hell Baron: the older, stronger form of a Hell Knight. There was a good chance that it was the one behind the attack considering how demon command structure often seemed to come down to the biggest and baddest leading the rest.
Well, time to cut the head of the snake.
###
With the invading feral forces repelled, the survivors exploded into a frenzy of celebrations. Cletus, Ralts, and Modeus were the center of attention, being praised for saving everyone. For their part, the trio felt rather awkward about it, but considering the circumstances, they simply humored the demons.
At some point, the smell of meat being cooked and the sounds of crackling fire attracted everyone's attention. A small group of demons had found a bunch of grills and had set them up. A few others were carving up the meat… feral meat.
"On one hand I'm very much fascinated considering the new cultural knowledge we can gain about demon cuisine, on the other, it's basically the equivalent of us eating chimps and other primates," Cletus commented to Ralts as the two watched a pinkie being sauteed over an open firepit.
"Didn't we eat Pinky Bacon this morning, though?"
"Well, we're not demons."
"Y'know…" Modeus piped up from next to them, her eyes boring into the roasting Pinky, "I really wanna get a bite of that… but mum will tan our hides purple if we tell her we're not having dinner with her."
"Considering the experience I had sleeping on your house's couch last night… I'm not prepared to risk being kicked out of her bed by angering her."
"I would relish the chance to wash all this blood off, to be honest."
The trio turned to look at Pandemonica, still being held in Alien's arms… though the man was starting to look rather tired. The demoness herself had smatterings of blood covering almost every inch of her body, only her face being somewhat clean. As for Alien, well, he was an absolute mess. His skin was burned, there were more cuts than he cared to count on his body, and some were still bleeding.
"Fam, not gonna lie you look like hammered shit," Cletus commented, taking in the state of his friend.
"Bro, I can't feel a damn thing," Alien replied lightly as if he were talking about the weather.
"Must be the remnants of adrenaline talking."
"Or the blood loss." Ralts added, noting that some of the cuts hadn't fully healed yet.
"Ehhh… maybe?" Alien conceded, his speech starting to slur a bit.
"Just… take a rest dude, we're not in immediate danger anymore," Cletus said, shaking his head.
Alien's eyes narrowed at that, apparently focusing on what Cletus had said. And he probably needed it, considering that he was starting to see double. He couldn't feel his arms anymore, and his legs were growing close to that point too.
Everyone else watched as Alien took a hesitant step forward, only to lose his balance and fall face-first with all the grace of a drunken blue whale. Pandemonica ended up pinned underneath him, squirming around while muttering half-hearted curses. After a few moments, she finally freed herself, having a bit of difficulty finding the right level of strength to move Alien's body without causing any more damage.
"We… might need to get him some help," Ralts muttered.
"No shit, the guy looks like he needs a visit to the nearest hospital and an IV drip."
"Are you trying to bankrupt us?" Pandemonica asked, genuinely baffled at the suggestion.
"Oh, right. I almost forgot that this place has every public service privatized. Nevermind."
"I mean… we could just bring him home?" Modeus interjected. "Hertzneìa has some healing properties, but for something of that level we'd definitely need mom."
"You're joking, right?"
Modeus turned around to see Sloth standing behind her… staying several meters away, though, so he had to yell.
"Are you even sure that it'll have the right effects on a human? For all we know it could just make it worse. I say we treat him the old-fashioned way, it's not like we're in a time crunch."
"And how, pray tell, do you suggest we do that?" Cletus got up, going towards Sloth to avoid having to yell back. "If you hadn't noticed, none of us have the proper training for that plus we're in the middle of a conflict zone. Our options are sorta limited."
Sloth visibly faltered at that. "Well, yeah, but it's just burns and cuts, no? It's not that hard to deal with. We can just scavenge for supplies, and-"
"Yeah, no." Ralts interrupted him. "We don't have the time for that, and Alien himself said that he's already been on the receiving end of some kinda healing magic when we got separated. It's our best option, considering that the only one of us who knows anything about first aid is down for the count."
"Enough." Pandemonica's hiss cut through the mounting argument like a hot knife through butter, leaving only silence. "We're wasting time, the longer we debate this the worse his future outlooks get." Pandemonica the bridge of her nose in frustration, before motioning to her fellow demoness. "Modeus, get over here and do what you can to keep him stable. I'll see about finding something to use as a stretcher."
With a hesitant nod, the demoness approached the downed man, her eyes glowing red. The hearts floating around her head took on the same glow, spreading over Alien's body and touching the worst wounds. The cuts stopped bleeding, and the burns seemed to be alleviated a tad, but that was it. There was no miraculous regrowth like had happened with Cletus, just… stabilization.
"I don't know how long I can keep this up for, Hertzneìa really isn't meant for this kind of stuff."
"It'll have to do for now," Pandemonica reassured her friend with a tap on the shoulder. With that, she was off.
The three remaining humans were left idle, unsure of what to do. That's when a handful of lesser demons approached them.
"Messiah, would you give us the honor of your company?" The demon in the lead asked Cletus. "We're about to begin the feast."
"Messiah?" Pandemonica probed, her narrowed gaze flickering between the lesser demons and the mortal.
"Look, they came up with the term on their own and I've already asked them to stop." Cletus defended himself before turning back towards the other demon. "Also, I'm afraid I can't. Our group has other things planned so we can't really stay."
The Tiefling-like being nodded, seeming somewhat disappointed by the response but not willing to push the issue further.
In the meantime, Pandemonica had found a somewhat intact door and casually ripped it off its hinges. After placing Alien on it - with Modeus' help - she called out to the remaining humans.
"Let's get moving, there's no time to waste."
She then walked off, forcing Modeus to hurry to not let Alien fall to the ground.
"Damn, I know Alien is a big guy…" Cletus muttered, staring at his friend's prone form.
"For you," Sloth muttered from the side.
"You know, even though I'm not a fan of capeshit I understood that. And I hate you for making a reference that old."
Sloth went to answer but found himself interrupted when both he and Cletus began to get dragged away by Ralts. Or rather, they let him pull them along.
###
Approaching the rich district, the group felt as if they'd walked through an invisible boundary of some sort, the ruined buildings giving way to the pristine copy-pasted mansions with little to no bloodstains anywhere.
"Wow, it's almost like a city-wide riot didn't just happen when you look at this place."
"Yeah, that's because of them." Modeus pointed to something in the distance.
Everyone turned to look at where the horny demoness pointed to and saw what looked like a garbage truck loading on bodies by the dozen. Around it, was a squad of demons armed to the teeth and garbed in tactical gear.
"Well, certainly can't fault them for not being efficient… even if said efficiency comes at the cost of basic decency like respect for the dead."
"They tried to kill us, fuck 'em," came a voice that nobody expected quite yet.
Everyone looked at Alien, who calmly flipped off something above himself. "I lived, bitch," he muttered.
"He's clearly delirious right now," Pandemonica said dismissively.
"Gee, no shit."
The demoness glared at Cletus, who pointedly ignored her, going to knock at the mansion's doors… only for them to swing open before he could even touch them.
"About time you got back! Dinner is almost ready- what in Lucifer's name happened to you?" Asmodeus immediately grabbed onto Cletus' head, turning it this and that way. "Where'd your beard and hair go?"
"I got burned to the point that I was knocking on heaven's door before being brought back," Cletus answered deadpan, leaving out a lot of context.
The devil chuckled at that, giving him a little slap on the cheek. "Hey now, don't say stuff like that. I'll get…" That was when she spotted everyone else, her mirth leaving immediately. "...worried."
Cletus gave away no indication that he was joking, his expression blank to the point of being akin to a thousand-yard stare.
"Mom? We kinda need your help here." Modeus waved at her mother, hoping that she wouldn't pay attention to the way her hair was still lightly smoking. "This guy got messed up pretty badly, and-"
"Inside. All of you. Now." Asmodeus stepped to the side, ushering everyone in without letting them get a word in edgewise.
Pandemonica and Modeus were directed to the living room, while the humans were very directly advised to clean themselves up before Asmodeus rushed off to join the other demons.
"And to think this day started off so well," Cletus complained as he cleaned soot and remnants of burnt hair off his face and scalp at a sink.
"Look at the bright side, we're all alive!" Ralts patted his friend's back as he walked out of the shower. "Anyways, shower's free."
Cletus didn't seem to respond at first, simply staring at his shaking hands for a moment before taking the offer for a hot shower with a silent nod.
Closing the door behind himself, Ralts was left wondering. "Now, where do I get some extra clothes…?"
###
Dinner had been… awkward to say the least, interrupted more than once by bouts of quiet sobbing from Cletus who couldn't find any of the variety of things on offer appetizing no matter how much he wanted to. Things had escalated to the point that Asmodeus had told everyone else to vacate the dining room.
"Is he going to be like that all evening?" Pandemonica muttered annoyedly as she tried to focus on reading, being constantly interrupted by Cletus' crying coming from the next room over followed by Asmodeus' attempts at soothing him.
"Probably, yeah." Ralts nodded whilst performing maintenance on his sidearm in the way his mentor had taught him. "He did come really close to dying, it's not something you get over in a few minutes."
"If he worked in my department, the DR would've got rid of him already. Mental breakdowns are bad for productivity."
"Aren't you the DR, though?"
"Exactly."
The conversation returned to a lull, the silence only interrupted by Cletus starting to scream at one point.
"Why are you here, exactly?" Pandemonica asked, realizing that Ralts being in the same room as her was… uncharacteristic of him, to say the least.
"No real reason," the man hummed. "You, on the other hand. Why are you here?"
The demoness gave him a flat look, pointedly flipping another page of her book. "I was here before he started. While these sounds may be annoying, I don't find myself inclined to leave."
Ralts shrugged. "Alright then. Anyways, when's it going to be your turn?"
"Is this some sort of human joke I'm too demonic to understand?"
"Cletus has Asmodeus." The man began to count on his fingers. "Modeus has been working on Sloth… though that's slow going. And then there's you. So when's your turn?"
Pandemonica glared at him, her eyes taking on the tell-tale glow of magic.
"You're walking on some dangerous ground there, little man…"
"And? If you wanted us dead, you would've killed us on day one." A grin stretched across his face. "And now you can't anymore."
For a moment the demoness was stunned by the confidence of the normally meek Ralts.
"As if," she huffed. "I may be in a contract with your friend, yes, but it doesn't mean I cannot make your existence worse than Hell if I put my mind to it."
The gun in Ralts' hand clicked as he slotted the last piece back. After a quick test, making sure that the slide was functioning, he flicked the safety on and put it away. Then, he met Pandemonica's glare with one of his own.
"If you want any hope of us going along with whatever scheme Lucifer has, then you'll have to do better than that."
Pandemonica hesitated at that, her mind running a mile a minute. "How does he know? I'm certain that nobody heard my reports, then when… Modeus."
"Well then." She straightened up, attempting to project more confidence than she felt. "I suppose the masquerade is over. Yes, Lady Lucifer has plans for you lot, and that includes - unfortunately for me - not killing you."
"There we go," she thought to herself. "Go on, take the bait. You'll let something slip."
"Aren't you forgetting something?" Ralts goaded her, leaning back into the sofa. "Maybe a tiny, insignificant, but important detail?"
"Nothing comes to mind, no. My Lady is quite secretive."
Ralts looked at her for a long moment. Pandemonica felt pressure around her, not unlike being stared down by a Fiend. She'd almost forgotten how it felt.
"Is… is this what they always feel like?" She suppressed a shudder, but a small part of her mind was certain that he'd noticed it. "Just what are they? Not humans, definitely. Just what did Lady Lucifer do to these… beings?"
And then, the moment was broken. Ralts' gaze left her as he went to stand up.
"Alright then," he shrugged again with a smile, moving towards the door. Before leaving though, he called out to her. "In that case, I'll go see if Alien is awake. Maybe I'll tell him about your feelings for him, would you like that? I'm sure it must be very hard to keep it all to yourself, especially now."
Pandemonica had expected many things. To be called out on her actual objective, to be ignored, even for the man to simply leave. But that last curveball dodged every reply she'd prepared, leaving her a sputtering mess.
"What? What are you even talking about? Me? And him? Absolutely not, I'd rather die!"
The man's hand hovered over the doorknob for a second after her tirade, before he turned around to her fully. "Do you really have a choice, though? It doesn't matter if you like him, or any of us. But I think he might be more agreeable to 'run a train on you', as it were, if you were honest about it."
He knew. If he knew even that, then he knew everything. She had to salvage this somehow!
"Ahem, yes, I… I suppose I did miss a detail there. Just a token of goodwill from Lady Lucifer, of course. After all, you've come a long way to arrive here, and the way to reach her is still long, so she assigned me to keep you… entertained."
Pandemonica had to stop herself from retching at what she said. Each word felt rotten on her tongue as she outright admitted to being nothing more than a toy for them to use. She would never admit it, even in her thoughts, but she was cursing Lucifer's name at that moment with every fiber of her being.
For his part, Ralts didn't seem very impressed.
"Goodwill, you say?" He mused, his voice lacking anything resembling emotion as he approached the armchair in which she was sitting. "I don't think it was goodwill. Why would the Lucifer, ruler of Hell, the one who took our souls and refused any attempt to bargain for them, have any goodwill for us?"
"Why, she-"
"Spare me your bullshit." Ralts hissed at her, cutting off any half-baked excuse she was trying to come up with. "I can't say that I know her plans - if she has any - but I can guess." He began to pace around the room, and at that moment Pandemonica felt like an insect, not worthy of attention as the man continued to rant.
"She wants to keep our souls, for whatever reason. But in the same vein, she wants us alive. And if she sent you, along with any other demon you can recruit to get into our pants- you're not exactly subtle, you know," he commented as she outright flinched. "At first I couldn't really piece this mess together, but after today I think I have a good grasp on what's going on."
"Care to explain it yourself, or should I?"
And that was the last nail in the coffin. Pandemonica bowed her head with a sigh, losing the will to even sit up straight anymore as the tension left her. In its stead was… nothing. She felt drained of everything.
"...Fine."
Even her voice sounded as dead as she felt.
"You four are Hollow. I'm not privy to all the details, but without a soul, you basically run off of sin. And being in Hell… you'll get powerful. As much as a High Demon, maybe more, I don't know."
"And she's afraid of us?"
"Doubt it. But you might be useful in whatever new dumb idea she has to take over Heaven."
"I take it you're not really thrilled with how your employment is going, huh?"
"Oh fuck no, she has the mind of a spoiled child, and her actions reflect that."
"You'd think that being in charge of Hell for who-knows-how-long would require some planning skills," Ralts muttered as he sat back down. "Anyways!" He addressed Pandemonica again, the demoness still staring into the void. "Planning aside, I had an actual question for you."
Pandemonica gave a tiny nod, and that was all he needed to continue.
"Now that you've gotten to know us a bit more, what do you think of Alien? He's the one you've been spending the most time around, after all." He settled down onto the couch, knowing that she would've needed some time to gather her thoughts.
Then, after a few minutes, she spoke.
"He's a meathead who likes to antagonize others. He's extremely stubborn, even when by all rights it should get him killed. He's careless, stupid, a general nuisance to be around…" She trailed off, unsure of how to continue.
"That he is, yeah." Ralts nodded. "Sometimes."
Pandemonica returned the nod. "Sometimes, yes. I'll admit that he isn't always that insufferable."
"And when he isn't?" The man pressed, hoping for the demoness to get to the conclusion he hoped for.
"He…"
She struggled to answer. No words she could come up with fit exactly what she wanted to say. Her mind conjured up a few memories. His bravado when facing her. His warmth when she hugged him. The way he smiled when she gave him that 'headpat' thing. How small she felt when he carried her, even when he was just about ready to collapse himself.
"He's not horrible company, I suppose."
Ralts shrugged, hiding his disappointment. "Alright then. Still, even if you've been discovered, do you intend to go along with those orders?"
That pulled Pandemonica out of her funk, the demoness glaring at Ralts with renewed vigor. "I have no intention to go through with such a demeaning plan only because I was told to do so. Unlike some of the demons here in Luxuria, I have some self-respect."
"Then lucky you, there's no need to do it anymore," he admitted with an easygoing grin. At Pandemonica's confused stare, he continued. "I mean, I'm not particularly interested. Sloth has his hands tied with the whole 'Modeus putting a spell on him' deal. Cletus is-" The lull of silence was broken by yet another bout of crying "-Well, there you have it," he finished raising his voice a bit.
"Aren't you forgetting someone?"
Ralts chuckled, knowing exactly where she was going with that. "Nope. If you tried to seduce Alien out of 'duty' or because you were 'following orders', well… saying that he'd be pissed is an understatement. And he wouldn't be the only one." His tone shifted from amused to frosty during that last sentence. The pressure returned for just a fraction of a moment before dissipating as if it hadn't been there.
Pandemonica's mind was reeling in confusion. "That makes no sense! He outright stated that he found me attractive, why would he deny himself a chance to… eugh." She didn't need that mental image.
Before she could put together her thoughts in a coherent sentence, the door clicked.
She was alone.
Dread and disgust in equal measure welled up inside her. Finally free to stop acting, she buried her face in her hands.
"I'm going to die…"
In a completely different zone of the mansion, Sloth and Alien were rifling through a veritable sea of books. The latter of the two was sporting bandages covering a large portion of his body, having been patched up by Asmodeus. The Devil had warned him to not exaggerate for a while, almost sounding caring.
That is until she elaborated that she didn't want either her daughter or Cletus to be cross with her, as it would be too much of a pain to deal with.
"Didn't expect someone in the circle of Lust to have so many books," Alien muttered as he put yet another book away after a glance.
"To be fair, most of it is smut." Sloth threw yet another book over his shoulder, the filthy novel joining several dozen others in a pile.
Finally noticing the pile, Alien stopped looking at the shelves and went to pick up the scattered books. "Can you not? It's not exactly polite to throw books around, and they ain't yours to boot." He lightly chastised his sort-of-friend.
"Tsk. Fine," Sloth acquiesced with a click of his tongue, holding back from throwing away yet another book.
They remained silent for a few more minutes before the younger man hazarded to break the silence again.
"Sloth, are you… How are you feeling?"
Sloth froze. He slowly turned to Alien, confusion clearly painted over his features.
"I have what amounts to a magical shotgun marriage contract sticking to me, binding me to a demon who tried to rape me. How the fuck do you think I feel, Alien?" He growled at the other human as if daring him to actually answer.
Alien wilted a bit, fully aware that he would get that answer. But he didn't let it stop him.
"I get that. I get that you're in an awful situation, but you've been… No, we've all been getting worse in some ways."
Sloth raised an eyebrow, motioning for the man to continue.
"Like, I acted like an asshole earlier today - which I'm sorry for, by the way. Cletus is… he means well, but he's been getting a little pushy at times…"
"You can say that again," the blonde muttered, rolling his eyes.
"...And you're as abrasive as sandpaper."
"Well fuck you too," Sloth turned back to the shelves with a huff. "I think I've got the right to be pissed."
Alien suppressed the urge to facepalm, both at the way the situation was progressing and at his apparent inability to get to the point.
"Being pissed doesn't mean that you should keep instigating everyone. We're all in the same boat." He grabbed Sloth's shoulder, forcing him to turn around and meet his gaze. "Weren't we supposed to get our souls back? How are we supposed to do that if we keep fighting?"
"I don't…" He sighed. "Alright, I'm sorry, happy now?"
Alien slowly shook his head. "I didn't ask for an apology. I want you to talk to us. We can't help you if we don't know the details of the problem, no?"
Sloth deadpanned at Alien. "Sure, take a page out of Cletus' book, why don't you? Worked really well for him."
"Ok." Alien removed his hand from Sloth's shoulder and took a step back. "You don't have to tell me. Go talk to Cletus, or Ralts… or even Pandemonica if you think it might help."
The duo shared a long look at that.
"Nah." They shook their heads in unison.
"Anyways, just… ask if you need anything. It'll take more than 'hell', or 'the devil' to stop us," Alien continued, maiming some quotes with his fingers. "Everything's fucked, but maybe we can ease the burden a bit- oh, I think I found something."
Sloth walked closer to see a book in Alien's hand. It was an unassuming little red thing, titled "Fencing techniques of ancient France".
"Not quite what I was looking for, but maybe there's something useful in there," the blonde muttered as he took the book and began to skim it. His brows furrowed, mouth turning into a tight grimace as he kept reading.
Then, he threw the book away with as much strength as he could.
"I will need to clean my hands with bleach after touching that," he hissed.
Alien blinked, eyes glancing between Sloth and the book currently on the other end of the room. It took him a moment.
"Oh. 'Fencing' techniques, huh?"
"If you make that joke I'll stab you."
"With which sword?"
"Goddammit Alien."
Behind them, the door clicked and swung open. Modeus walked inside, her usual strut closer to a power-walk as she made a beeline for a specific section of the library. She barely even noticed the two humans there, but they definitely took note of her.
Sloth moved instinctively, taking a step back and keeping Alien between himself and the demoness. The taller man gave him a questioning glance but thankfully didn't press the matter. Instead, he followed the demoness.
"May I ask what you're searching for?"
"A book," Modeus replied half-heartedly.
"You seem pretty focused. Looking for a specific one?"
She barely gave an affirmative hum, moving to another shelf and scanning the books there.
Alien rolled his eyes at that. He glanced at Sloth from the corner of his eye, finding the man looking conflicted. He seemed stuck between walking over to Modeus and holding himself back.
Well, he could provide a push.
"Modeus, if you tell us what you're looking for we could help you search for it," he called out a bit louder than strictly necessary.
That seemed to do the trick, as the demoness finally turned to properly look at them, fidgeting a bit.
"Ah, yes. I… didn't see you, sorry."
"That book?" Came Sloth's curt question.
The demoness looked down at the floor, her tail curled against one of her legs. "Er, yes. The book. It's called "Geas, Bindings, and Vibes"."
Sloth kept staring at Modeus dispassionately, while the demoness kept staring at the ground. In the meantime, Alien remembered something.
"Pink and white book, really big?" He asked, remembering where he'd seen said book.
After receiving a nod from Modeus, he went and brought the book - more of a tome really - to her. She placed the tome on a table nearby and began to rifle through its pages at a feverish pace.
Out of curiosity, Alien hazarded a look at the pages which he was sure would be filled with smut, only to find diagrams, what looked like magic circles, and a whole lot of scribbles.
"What… do you need this for?" He asked, suddenly very afraid.
Modeus took a few seconds to answer.
"I fucked up. Badly. And I'm trying to fix it."
"Ah, if it isn't my favorite bureaucrat!" Lucifer answered from the other end of the phone in a tone that seemed like it was simply designed to add insult to injury for Pandemonica. "What do you have for me?"
"Well, Luxuria is in utter chaos..."
"No, no not that I don't care about that."
Pandemonica held in an aggravated sigh. "Ma'am, you are aware that Luxuria's population is less than half of what it was this morning according to the latest estimates, right? You can't simply ignore this."
"Watch me. Honestly, if they want to kill themselves, whose problem is it?"
"Yours you damn buffoon!" That was what she wanted to say, but several centuries of dealing with Hell's CEO taught her better.
"They aren't simply killing themselves for the sake of it, ma'am. A rebellion has begun, and I speculate that one of the goals is to get rid of your position."
"My palace? What did it do to them-"
"I mean you. Their stated goal is to change Hell's political landscape quite radically, and not in a way that is beneficial for any of us."
"Then again, maybe I wouldn't have to deal with you anymore." She had entertained the thought a few times over her long life, and now it was looking more real than ever.
After a long moment, in which Pandemonica thought that she'd broken Lucifer, the CEO finally spoke up again.
"I see. In that case, I have a solution."
Wait why did she feel scared-
"All political activity is banned. The only exceptions remain the Devils and above. The punishment for disregarding this decree will be death."
Pandemonica was so shocked at her superior's words that she couldn't even find the energy to facepalm at the utter stupidity of it. Actually no, it had gone far beyond stupidity. She was being downright suicidal.
That was the final straw for her.
"On one hand, side with Lucifer and hundreds of thousands of demons. And probably die. And if I don't, still have to deal with her." It wasn't a very enticing choice. "On the other hand, take the rebels' side, and by extension… the humans. And maybe live, without having to deal with this imbecile anymore."
It wasn't a hard choice to make.
"I see. In that case, I will defer to your decisions, ma'am."
"Good. Nothing else?"
Pandemonica hesitated a moment. She didn't want to outright lie, there was no doubt that Lucifer would know. If there was one positive thing you could say about her, was that she could spot lies very easily.
Thus, she settled for a partial truth.
"One of the humans seems to have figured something about their nature. There was an outburst of… I would guess Giersavrós? I was a bit too far to sense it properly at the time, we were under attack by a horde of ferals."
"Oh, that's nice." Lucifer sounded a bit too chipper. "Really nice. I'm so happy to hear that these mortals are growing stronger, really it warms my blackened heart." She paused for a moment, and Pandemonica braced herself.
"Now, if only a certain someone could give me some fucking results too! That would just be the best!" The Fiend's shrill screech threatened to rupture Pandemonica's eardrums, but she held strong.
"I'm sorry ma'am, there were some complications-"
"I don't care!" Lucifer interrupted, still screaming. "I gave you one. Job. Get those mortals to eat out of your palm: they're too valuable to lose just because you were too incompetent. You have no idea what's going on, but I'm warning you right now. If you fail, you aren't getting a second chance."
"I-"
"Hush. I don't want to hear it. You have until you reach Gula to provide me with some results, or I'll be sending in Cerberus to take your place. I don't care what you have to do, or how humiliating it might be. If they want you to act like their fucking pet, then you do it. And you'd better do it with a smile on your face. Understood?"
Pandemonica's self-restraint was holding on by a thread at that point. She wanted to scream, to curse at this too-grown child that was her boss, but… she couldn't. Not yet.
"...I understand, ma'am."
The line fell silent.
Surrounded by the silence of a half-destroyed town and its sleeping inhabitants, Pandemonica had a second realization about herself.
She'd forgotten what pain felt like.
This fic is back, everyone! With more chaos that ever, and with a long chapter to boot! We've officially breached 10K words on this chapter, damn.
Big thanks to Cletus, Ralts, and Sloth for being here even after that long break. Let's hear it from the boys!
Ralts: "It's getting fun!"
Cletus: "I'd just like to say that this was probably the most rewarding chapter to work on in hindsight considering just how much we got done. But again most of that is thanks to Alien being able to push out words like nobody's business when he gets down to it."
Sloth didn't wanna join the fun.
Another big thanks to my patrons!
Tier 1, Private: whod99
Tier 3, Emperor: CameronTheFrozenBurrito, Wiggy