Remus Lupin held his head in his hands as he sat before the Order in the small, stuffy lounge at 12 Grimmauld Place. The air was heavy with expectation as the remaining members of the Order waited for him to explain. Dumbledore, McGonagall, Hermione and Snape were all absent. It was Alastor Moody who finally broke the silence.
"Pray tell us Remus, where is Dumbledore, and what in Merlin's name can be so awful you cannot tell us?" he growled, his short patience already stretched.
"Moody – give him a chance, it's obvious something pretty terrible has happened," soothed Tonks, turning back to her lover and gently stroking his arm, "Remus, when you are ready, love."
Remus nodded slowly before raising his pale face to them. He ran a shaky hand through his dishevelled hair and cleared his throat, "Dumbledore sends his apologies, he is unable to attend tonight due to, erm, because he is required at Hogwarts."
"What can be more important than briefing us for this mission?" hissed Sirius Black. He pushed his chair back and began to pace the room, "Sometimes I wonder what he expects from us –" he raged.
He whirled towards Remus and stopped in his tracks. His friend's face was so despondent and bleak it silenced him instantly, colour draining from his face.
"Remus – what is it?" he gasped.
"Severus was late returning from the task Dumbledore set him. As a result, he was also late in getting my Wolfsbane potion to me. Dumbledore believed it imperative that I avoid the change this month, but I had already retreated to the Shack by the time Severus returned." He swallowed hard. When he spoke again, his voice was barely a whisper. "I didn't know until afterwards, I swear it. It's all my fault, if he dies –" he whimpered and threw his head into his hands once more as sobs began to wrack his body.
"If who dies, Remus?" Harry's voice was gentle.
Remus swallowed hard again, as though something were lodged in his throat.
"Severus – he tried, but by the time he arrived it was too late – I don't remember anything before Dumbledore released me, when I had returned to my human form."
His words hung heavy in the air. The silence was absolute. It was a moment before anyone spoke.
"You attacked Severus?" Tonks gasped, one hand flying to her mouth. She had paled considerably.
Mournfully, Remus nodded.
"How bad?" Harry's voice was barely a whisper, eyes wide in disbelief behind his glasses.
"Merlin," Remus swore, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath to compose himself. When he opened his eyes they were glistening with unshed tears. "I damn near killed him, Harry. Gods, the blood! I've never seen so much blood – I didn't mean, you must believe me, Harry –" he lurched forward and grabbed the young wizard's arm, eyes desperate. "Please believe me!"
Harry nodded mutely, and Remus closed his eyes in relief before taking a deep, shaky breath and continuing.
"Dumbledore wouldn't tell me what I did to him and I don't remember! I think he was trying to spare me somehow, but Gods, the blood! I can't get it out of my head – it was just everywhere." He began to tremble, staring fixedly at his fingernails. Despite repeated scrubbing, traces of Severus's blood still remained deep under his nails. He felt nauseous. "They moved him by 4-way apparition because he was so badly injured they couldn't risk moving him too much. By the time they got there his heart had stopped. Dumbledore had to call Fawkes –"
Suddenly, the fireplace burst into life, bright green flames signalling an incoming floo message and Dumbledore's head appeared amongst the flames. He looked to have aged considerably, lines of worry marked his brow and his eyes were bright with emotion.
"Profes –" Moody began, but stopped as Dumbledore waved him away.
"No time for pleasantries – Remus, we need you here immediately. The mission is abandoned forthwith, all of you please return to your homes and await further instructions." The old wizard turned to go before Harry's voice made him pause.
"Sir, Professor Snape – is he -?" the question died on his lips as he saw the devastation in the Headmaster's face.
"Severus is holding on, Harry, but only just. It would appear this may be even too much for Fawkes." With a weary sigh, he looked directly at Remus. "Remus, now, if you please." With that, the Headmaster vanished and the flames returned to normal.
Remus rose shakily to his feet, and with one final glance at his shocked colleagues, threw a pinch of floo powder into the flames and vanished.
In the silence that followed his departure, Harry stared dumbstruck at the men and women assembled around him. It was Tonks who spoke first, her voice unsteady with emotion, "We must pray Severus makes it, for himself and for the sake of Remus's soul."
A moment after stepping into the floo, Remus found himself in the familiar surroundings of the Hogwart's Infirmary. The lights had been dimmed and the empty beds stood all around him like ghosts. Light spilled from the small side room nestled at the far end next to Poppy's office. He could hear hushed voices. He stole a look at Dumbledore and was shocked to find him staring at him, his pale blue eyes twinkling with unshed tears. He watched as the old wizard cleared his throat and tried to find a voice.
"Remus, I brought you here because –" he stopped as his voice broke. He raised a trembling hand to his face and dragged it wearily across his eyes and took a deep, steadying breath before trying again, "So you could make your peace with Severus," he managed. Without waiting for the stunned man to respond, he took him by the arm and led him towards the small room at the back.
"Albus – what are you, is Severus okay?" he whispered, voice quavering once again.
The Headmaster strode onwards, "No Remus, he is not okay. In fact, he doesn't have long left to live and I thought you of all people, would want to speak with him. Now, we must hurry."
Remus let himself be guided into the small, dimly lit room, his mind numb with shock. Clearly, his face reflected his thoughts as his eyes met the red rimmed eyes of Hermione, who rose to greet him as he stumbled to a stop at the end of the bed. She nodded gently, biting her lip and fighting hard not to lose control. Mutely, he nodded back and the young witch sank wearily back into her chair and picked up a limp hand, stroking it gently. He turned his gaze to the man lying still on the crisp white linen. He looked as though he had been carved in marble such was the paleness of his skin. He could see faint traces of bruising along the left side of his face but otherwise he looked unscathed. He chanced a look at Poppy who was stood quietly in the corner, sniffling into a tissue, a shocked and silent Minerva stood next to her with an arm linked through the mediwitch's clutching so tightly her knuckles showed white. The two witches did not acknowledge his presence. Swallowing hard, he stumbled to stand beside the stricken man's head. His mouth felt full of cotton wool and his head was a riot of jumbled thoughts – he couldn't reconcile the man lying in front of him with his knowledge of what had happened. There were great gaps in his memory and he was confused as to what exactly he had done to put Severus in this condition.
"What did I do to him?" the words were so quiet they would have been missed had the room itself not been in held in silent vigil.
"What did you do?" Minerva's voice cracked behind him. "Do you mean to say you do not understand why Severus should be dying at this very moment? Especially as he looks so whole? Our dear Poppy is a magician with wounds, isn't she?" He turned to face her, and visibly flinched at the hatred marring her normally calm countenance. "I will show you, Wolf." She shrugged her arm out of Poppy's and took a step towards him. She grasped his left hand, lifting his arm up and placing it on Severus's pale cheek. "You took this hand and you hit him so hard you fractured his skull. Then, not content with that," she gripped his right forearm hard in her other hand, nails biting into his skin and forced it to rest against a shoulder, "you took this hand and threw him bodily into the Whomping Willow, shattering most of his ribs and his left shoulder." She increased the grip on his arms and he felt her nails sink into his skin.
"Minerva, no –" Albus pleaded softly. Minerva ignored him completely, her eyes two hard daggers boring into Remus.
"Then," she whispered, "despite his weakened state Severus bravely forced the Wolfsbane into your monstrous mouth - after which," she began to tremble, tears starting to cascade down her cheeks, "you used your razor sharp claws to cleave into his flesh, shredding one of his lungs like confetti, before throwing him to the floor like some discarded plaything. In what was probably his last spell and in unfathomable pain, this brilliant, incredibly brave man used the Willow to incarcerate you until the potion could take effect. In short, Mr Lupin, you have single-handedly destroyed not only our best hope of triumphing in this war, but also a man I love dearly and cherish as I would my own son. There can be no forgiveness for what you have done. You are an abomination." She hissed the last word and flung his arms back violently before storming towards the door, pausing only to glare pointedly at Albus. As a parting gift she spat out over her shoulder, "As for you, Albus – I resign, henceforth. From Hogwarts and from your ridiculous Order. I cannot abide another moment serving a monster like you." Before moving rapidly from the room in an angry swirl of emerald tartan.
There was a stunned silence before Dumbledore excused himself, stumbling slightly as he moved to rush after her.
As Minerva's words formed torturous images in his mind, Remus found his legs could no longer support his weight and he collapsed down into the chair beside the bed. He placed his head in his hands and let the tears come, a relentless slideshow of memories flickering through his mind. For a moment, the only sound was the keen sobbing of the broken man, until Hermione's voice broke through.
"Remus, Severus would not have blamed you for this and I think you know that deep down. He took many risks in life, and he understood the dangers. I have feared this day since the moment I realised I was in love with him – I was always destined to lose him. It seems fitting that his last act should be one of bravery, of sacrifice." She whimpered gently, wiping a tear from her eye as it leaked slowly out.
"I think you should also know, that he has been working for some time on a cure for your affliction." She smiled fondly at the silent man in the bed, "Ever since that day in the Shack all those years ago, he has wanted to ease the suffering of those with lycanthropy, so that nobody should have to suffer the way you have. He is so gifted in so many ways." She reached inside her robes and produced a small bottle containing a swirling, purple liquid. "He certainly earned his title. Here, take it." She pushed the small vial into Remus's trembling hands. "He ran several trials with volunteers from around the globe, with a 100% success rate. It is a cure, Remus, and he did it for you."
Remus stared intently at the swirling liquid, his heart hammering so hard he felt it might push up out of his throat. "He did this…for me?" he whispered. Hermione nodded.
"Severus has a heart like no-one else I've ever met and although he pushes everyone away it is his love for others that drives him to do the things he does. His strive for redemption for decisions he made so long ago that he has repaid many, many times over. It is my biggest regret that he never let others see the best of him."
"They will see, Hermione, we will ensure it." It was Harry. He was standing in the doorway, his face set in grim determination. With a strangled sob, Hermione launched herself into his arms and crushed her face against his shoulder, sobbing deeply. He smoothed the riot of curls around her, "Sssh, it will be okay, I think there is something we can try."