A/N: Here's another installment of Sick But Not twisted. There's a lot here but not really anything to brag about; expect heavy AU elements in later chapters.
Sick But Not Twisted
Chapter Two: The former friend and the former friend
As busy as Akatsuki were building their wealth in preparation for its goal of world domination, Itachi found herself having more free time than she really knew what to do with.
She long ago learned to leave her robes behind, unless you wanted to catch the attention of some random shinobi who'd heard about Akatsuki's financial advances in the criminal world.
Of course, they could always just recognize her face, but without the robe, people were more likely to stare at her than associate her with Itachi Uchiha of the sharingan.
But that was what her straw hat was for.
Something to hide most of her features.
The bar wasn't crowded—day had become evening mere minutes ago and Itachi wasn't really one to drink. Even after removing the majority of her family she definitely tried it, but it was still something she decided would remain a rarity for her.
The straw hat on her head did well in concealing most of her features under its shadow.
Still, sitting at the bar on an elevated stool, sipping a Lemon Sour, and chatting with the bartender who didn't seem to have a single inkling who she was despite the fact that the bar gave away free Bingo books in order to attract shinobi.
The girl sat there, quietly sipping her mild alcohol and reading one of the bingo books—staring at the profiles and purposely avoiding her own section.
—
Wanted:
Dead or Alive
Deidara _
Reward: $370,580
X_Ōnoki
(More details on the next page)
—
She'd heard of him before. Their leader couldn't stop mentioning Deidara actually.
Seemed like a new prospect for the Akatsuki.
Something he would note for his Konoha informant.
"A lot of shinobi come through here actually—would you believe, someone said we had Kabuto, one of Orochimaru's goons, in here the other week."
The bartender was spraying this bottle all over his counter and thoroughly wiping it, only glancing at Itachi every so often.
"Kabuto…" she answered "Quite the powerful shinobi, though what his future entails is definitely clouded in mystery."
"Oh, you seem to know a bit about them! What do you do—you're a Kunoichi?"
For a moment she was silent, she didn't have her headband or her robe—just some hidden weapons and food pills in case she had to run.
"Hm." was all she replied finishing her drink and the man could decipher that any which way he wanted.
"I see underground work. Pretty cool, pretty cool. Just saying—a lot of dangerous criminals out here."
"I can imagine."
"I've even seen the 4th Mizukage in here before, he'd bought everyone drinks one time. Nice, though sort of creepy, guy."
That was actually quite interesting, she could imagine the small and powerful Jinchurki doing that and it almost made her giggle.
She flipped through a page.
—
Wanted:
Dead or Alive
Orochimaru _
Reward: $450,790
X_Hiruzen Sarutobi
(More details on the next page)
—
"You don't believe me." the bartender said, ceasing his wiping.
Kunoichi looked up from her book, flipping a free strand of hair from her eyes "I believe you. Not the most unusual thing I've seen around."
"Yeah…" the bartender then looked at her more closely "You know, you look sort of familiar, you come around here often?"
And there it was, the hat really doesn't hide much huh?
"Not particularly."
"That's weird…" he touched his chin and Itachi silently prayed that the man didn't figure it out and then start freaking out.
So, with that said she kept turning the bingo book and while giving him a raised eyebrow, as if, she didn't know herself.
"What're you here for?"
And the answer to that was simple: "Work." Then she pushed the glass his way to say that she was finished.
"If you're looking for work, there's a family down the road that recently lost their daughter to a rogue group of bandit shinobi—hear they're paying a lot—might make you some money.
A family missing their daughter?
Price?
No, Itachi would help for no charge.
"Where?" Her eyes looked at him with urgency.
A sweatdrop fell down his forehead "…ohh, uh–down the road, right beside that fake-pharmacy." He pointed through the door and Itachi thought she got where he was pointing.
With a nod, the shinobi removed herself and then exited the bar to an afternoon fog and glare from the sun. The book still remained in her hand as she continued to read, remaining as inconspicuous as possible as she went down the dirt road.
-The road was a bit muddy.
That's when she mindlessly passed to that page.
Itachi stopped walking—curiosity getting the better of her.
—
Wanted:
Dead or Alive
Itachi Uchiha
Reward: $469,720
X_Danzo Shimura
(More details on the next page)
—
In the book was a photo of Itachi, clad in her anbu attire—she didn't even remember taking that photo and there Itachi was with the blankest expression.
—Before her greatest failures.
Unfortunately, She wished she had smiled in that picture. But to be honest, back then when she was still trying to stop any sort of bloodshed there had been a lot sitting on her mind.
There was nothing to smile about back then if she remembered. But a smile would have made her much more photogenic.
It didn't help that when people recognized her they felt the need to cower or run away—or attack her.
It really made her wish Sasuke would face her with a mastered mangekyou already.
"Oye!"
Pause.
Itachi looked up from the book, not expecting anyone to be called for her
Before her stood eight shinobi all masked though not hailing headbands from any significant villages.
"You're not from around here—and we have a little tax for those from out of town. And you look like you have a lot of money." One stepped forward, his mask that of a mist hunter nin—but it was beaten and tarnished. All she could tell was that he was a silky bleached blond with a semi-deep voice.
Wow, Pain did mention that this particular mist village was quite criminal-infested.
Itachi tilted her straw hat upwards, looking at the ninja who all stared at her with the arrogance of a raging bull—all with the exception of their leader who took a step back as he awkwardly stared at her profile.
It typically was all she needed to do in most situations—in order to avoid combat.
"Boss…she's not saying anything…"
"Yeah, let's take her shit already!"
The supposed boss scratched his bleached hair "Call me crazy but, does she sort of look like that Uchiha chick?"
A wave of silence…
"Itachi Uchiha?"
"The clan killer?"
"The hot murdering S-class psychopath?"
"Yeah, she has those crazy sharingan eyes too! That Itachi?"
The roll of Itachi's eyes was an accidental impulse.
Psychopath? Really?
She understood, but really?
The wind kicked up some dirt.
The boss poked his lip out in a semi-pout and said "Y-yeah that's like the only Itachi I can think of."
Then a shudder of fear hit the group and Itachi wanted to roll her eyes.
She barely killed anyone outside of the boundaries of her mission.
With the rub of his chin, the leader looked to his men "I don't believe it—I mean what would be the odds that we run into a Kunoichi like her?"
The last woman, Uchiha, took off her hat and dropped it, and stood like a stonewall "Do you need any more confirmation?"
Between the rogue ninja, there was silent pandemonium but somehow they still managed to stand their ground.
Their voices were indecipherable from one another.
"Do we fight this, boss?"
"We do outnumber her!"
"Don't ask me to fight murdering Uchiha lady, are you crazy?!"
"Uh—the five nations have a run-on-sight order for her? It isn't different here in Kirigakure, shouldn't we follow the same policy?"
"Naw, screw the Uchiha, we got this."
"Shut up all of you!" The leader cleared his throat with an exaggerated viciousness "Itachi Uchiha! We're no slouches and as you can see numbers are totally in our favor. So, kunoichi, I suggest you surrender and give up all your money, belongings, and weapons." at the last part he raised his shoulders as if what he was saying were obvious
But see, this kunoichi would do no such thing.
She wasn't really interested in wasting too much time with them.
"Remember what they tell you about fighting an Uchiha…" she began, the chakra in her eyes igniting her sharingan—they all prepared for battle "don't look us in the eye."
And for their credit, none of them did. They all looked towards her feet.
But that was fine.
Her words were just a ruse.
Her eyes remained the color of charcoal.
Itachi didn't need her sharingan for ninja who couldn't even contend with her 11-year-old self.
With the flick of her hair, Itachi pointed her finger and all eight of the ninja dropped.
It was silent.
There were only a few people who passed by
If anyone else had been watching they had hidden themselves well.
There was no time to waste.
Itachi was looking for personal work for basic survival needs—though how could she give up a cry for help? Fighting random rogue ninja was not in her agenda for the day.
So, Itachi put her hat back on and inconspicuously walked away from the unconscious ninja and Kunoichi—
Making sure to rush a bit as to get away from the scene, she discovered nobody probably cared that she just beat up a bunch of no good goods and continued about her business.
That's when she came upon the home she was pointed to the direction of. Now she wasn't quite sure if this was it, but the gray concrete box that was the small house. The door was slightly parted open, though still locked on with a chain lock.
Itachi knocked.
A few seconds before footsteps notified her of the woman coming into the doorway.
"Hello? If you've come to rob us, it's already too late." Her voice was feminine all coming from a milk chocolate-haired teenager dressed in black trousers and a shirt that looked like they'd been through a day's work.
That made Itachi frown "No, I'm not here to take any of your possessions. I hear that you're in need of assistance."
Hopefully, she hadn't said anything wrong.
The chocolate-haired girl shook her head in disbelief "That's what the others said before they robbed us of all our money!"
Stunned Itachi wondered if she should just exit, before a much more mature brunette made her presence known by slapping a wooden spoon on the girl's head.
Bop!
The younger girl rubbed her head in absolute emotional frustration.
"Although, we've been through tough times" the older woman pushed the door further open and the teenager a bit behind her "How can we forget our hospitality? Even if you've come to rob us, we have little left. How may we help you, stranger?"
It was a strange way to greet someone.
But Itachi couldn't be one to judge those that had clearly been through a lot of heartaches.
Plus she indeed seemed so sweet.
"I apologize if I'm bothering you and your family, but I was informed that you may be in need of some assistance."
"If you're truly here to help —just know, my husband was a shinobi once…he used to protect us from anyone who used to be up to no good, until—If you're like my husband, then there's nothing for us to fear."
Too trusting?
"I understand…" Itachi said.
"You've heard about the kidnapping then, just like the others."
"Of course." Itachi said, eyeing the older daughter who looked away with her arms crossed, which made Itachi push her hat further down "I actually intend on helping, please don't fret."
"If what you're saying is true then I sure am happy you brought back up."
Silence for a split second:
"Pardon?" Itachi asked.
"You're not with him?" The woman pointed a finger behind Itachi.
With who?
Itachi twirled around on her heels only to come face to face with the dog anbu mask that belonged to a certain Kakashi Hatake.
Suddenly, she remembered what she had done in their last encounter a little over a year ago.
But what puzzled her the most at the moment was how Kakashi had been able to sneak up on her from behind.
Maybe if she had been paying more attention?
Maybe Itachi needed more improvement?
Maybe Kakashi had been training?
Kakashi gestured with his hand "Ma'am, please step aside…"
The woman looked at the two ninja parted lips. "Huh…?" fear immediately spread when the woman felt the murderous intent of both ninja spilling into the atmosphere.
Though, Itachi didn't intend on killing anyone today.
"Oh, it's you, Kakashi-senpai."
Suddenly, she had the urge to apologize for what she'd done over a year ago.
She probably shouldn't have even indulged in any of her emotional desires—it just made things harder.
Maybe it was better she pretended none of that happened.
None.
Not even the part back then— where they still understood each other.
"Ah, what's the point of the mask if you're just simply going to say my name?" he said, sizing her up as he removed his headband from his sharingan eye.
One single giggle came out "I apologize, I thought the gray hair would be giveaway enough."
Nobody said a word.
"Touché."
"What are you doing here? Have you come to capture me?" she blankly looked at her purple nails.
With a katana suddenly in his hand, white-blue electricity consumed its blade and he replied "Yeah, I have."
"What the hell—what the—what the hell is going on?" The lady said, slowly inching her door closed, shooing her daughter further into the house.
"Please stay inside your home and don't be alarmed. You've just encountered a wanted S-class criminal—I may have just saved your life."
Oh yeah, Itachi was certainly going to murder those two because Itachi just absolutely loved to harm and murder people.
No, she had killed enough people for a lifetime.
Kakashi was successfully slowing down any hero work she'd attempted to put on her plate.
The book in Itachi's hand was swished from her hands by the wind and opened directly on the floor for all to witness.
—
Wanted:
Dead or Alive
Itachi Uchiha
Reward: $450, 000
X_Danzo Shimura
(More details on the next page)
…
—
The woman looked at Itachi as if there were some sort of huge betrayal and Itachi could only stare on with a cold expressionless gaze.
"You think of me so lowly." Itachi sighed "What, you by yourself—you're going to bring me in?"
"I think I already said that!" He pointed his katana.
"And I already told you back then. I have no intentions of killing you, for I cherish our past friendship. Do not get in my way and I won't kill you."
Please don't get in her way!
"Ah, I'm gonna have to say no to that one. You committed treason against Konoha, I'm taking you down. And don't think I haven't been honing my skills since last time."
Last time…
The memory she had to force from her mind before asking "I see, you'd like to demonstrate to me then?"
"No, I'd like to bring in a traitor."
"Setting such high expectations will only leave you sour and disappointed." she retorted, but gave him a devilish smile and she thought for a moment he twitched.
With that Itach leaped off their porch and attacked Kakashi, a hidden kunai falling from within her shirt and landing in hand as they began their fight with a clash of blades and the Akatsuki member began by leading Kakashi away from the village.
Past all bystanders and passer-bys, past the unguarded edge of the village's crumbling concrete gate, and into the mist-filled forest.
With electricity enhancing his blade Kakashi attacked at least a hundred times in two seconds.
Yes, she counted—because that was how long she had to duck and swerve away from his blade, she was cautious though, Kakashi was in fact a threat and he kept her light on her toes.
He came at her again, she attacked with her kunai aiming for his neck, she knew he'd duck
But he didn't…
Instead, what she was left with was a water clone.
Interesting—so where was Kakashi?
"Doton Kekkai: Dorō Dōmu!"
Itachi was already 16 feet in the air when the earth began buckling and rocks ascended to imprison her. Only for her to turn mid-air to find and the anbu operative right next to her looking her dead in the eye with his single crimson sharingan—it was absolute concentration.
Her hair began levitating, blue outshining the sun. "Raikiri!"
It extended like lightning from right beside her, Itachi maneuvered herself mid air and landed as electricity leveled the spot she had been momentarily.
Immediately she activated her own sharingan.
His eyes went to her feet.
His effort was great—she understood why he was an Anbu captain.
"Impressive. That doesn't look quite like your Chidori? Ah, Most flashy. You've leveled up, I see."
But just as Kakashi landed two of her water clones burrowed themselves out of the ground before both of her clones flanked his side and both swiftly went through the hand signs.
"Katon: Gōkakyū no Jutsu!" they both said as fireballs devoured the position Kakashi had been.
But the fire attacks never met his flesh or anything. Instead, he slid away only for Itachi to flash behind him and press her small kunai to the side of his throat.
Her former captain just froze.
"Is it your mission to capture me, senpai?" her voice came out as a whisper in his ear.
So close, his scent ran into her nostrils.
Her desire to gently touch him had to be held back.
The Konoha shinobi didn't even flinch.
"No, I'm here for something else…" his eyes cornered in her direction and she knew she only had a few moments before Kakashi figured a way to get out without any harm coming his way.
"And you just so happened to be in the neighborhood."
"Right!" Even from behind she could imagine his one-eye grin "Was actually going to help that family on my free time... when I discovered you."
"Hm."
She was going to do the same.
"And what did you plan to do to that family, Itachi?"
It didn't surprise that to this day everyone thought that she just did horrible things on a whim. No matter where she was or what her intentions were, if someone recognized her—the assumption was that she was up to no good even when it was quite the opposite.
So, was the curse of Itachi Uchiha, killer of the Uchiha clan.
It made sense.
"Nothing. I was curious about the story about the local's missing daughter, even I seek some sort of entertainment."
"Hard to believe."
That's when her eyes narrowed and her chest clenched "You think I just go around causing problems for no reason. You've been misled. What purpose would I have in causing more mayhem for that family?"
"You like to play sick games."
"Ah, that's how you rationalize this?" she said with no trace of emotion.
"I suppose you're going to say that you actually meant what you said the last time."
Of course, he didn't believe her.
And she never expected him to, because Itachi's own self-centered personal desires did not matter.
She brought the kunai closer by a thousand nanometers and in a flashed black blur Kakashi was out of her knife hold and a good two feet away, Itachi watched giving him a glare.
"I am." She admitted "And it's no lie. Don't worry, if my mission calls for it my feelings won't impede hostilities. But again, it isn't my intention to kill you, so my suggestion would be to flee"
Her threat did little to change Kakashi's demeanor.
"What mission?"
Perhaps she had said too much.
That's when she sprinted forward and dove her kunai into the Kakashi that she knew was a water clone, before instantly blocking a downward slash from the real Kakashi who seemed to manifest from the sky.
They exchanged blades, metal vibrating as their fight took them through the clearing, though this time Kakashi gave her a quick shove and her back hit a tree, and immediately after she felt the cold of his katana's blade caress her throat.
Itachi simply looked at Kakashi, her former friend, avoiding the gaze of her sharingan as he spoke
"It's my duty as a leaf shinobi to eliminate any threats to the security and freedom of the village. Whatever past friendship means nothing, especially to scum."
That was how he felt about her?
Scum?
She continued to stare at him, daring him to look her in the eye.
Itachi really was scum.
At least she felt like it.
Regardless, of if someone could justify her past actions or not.
Through the mist, she felt droplets of water falling.
"I'm sorry it has to be this way. But, the Itachi I knew—the Itachi I knew isn't you."
No, the Itachi he used to know was only slightly broken, the current Itachi was completely shattered.
But his hands didn't move—Kakashi of the sharingan didn't try to drive his blade into her throat and silence her.
Sure, she could get out at any moment, but the moment of hesitation made her stay put.
"I'm the same Itachi, just simply with a different motive in mind."
That made Kakashi grip his hilt with such force— "What motive compelled you to kill your own family?!"
At first she wasn't going to answer—as she did when most people asked that question, however…
"Senpai, it's better if you're left in limbo."
"That's code for, you have no reason. That's sick and twisted. You're sick and twisted."
"…I'm not."
"What?"
"I'm neither sick nor twisted. My reasonings remain my own."
It was for the better that he didn't know.
"There was a lot I didn't want to believe. Our friendship—what we went through— all of it felt inorganic after everything. And you left the village wondering why? Why would such a promising kunoichi do such a terrible thing? Tell me…don't you think I should know?"
"No. You're acting entitled."
"Because you said you still cherished our past friendship. Plus—" Kakashi stopped.
She blinked her sharingan away almost against her will.
Her vision was slightly blurred.
"We were friends, correct?" She confirmed suddenly feeling uncertain.
"We were friends…We used to pop soldier pills together, I'd say so."
"Soldier pills and illegal assassinations."
That totally made them friends.
"Yeah…" he confirmed.
And Itachi sighed "I'm sorry it turned out this way…"
But this was the path she chose.
"You're not."
The blade was digging into her throat. She felt the icy steel in each of his words...oh and she guessed the blade was icy too.
Without the sharingan he dared to gaze her into her eyes.
"I am. Reality can be such a painful experience. The fact that I contributed to such atrocities makes my body ache."
"But not enough to turn yourself in?"
Itachi gave him a raised eyebrow "I have to complete my mission."
"Then you'll turn yourself in?"
"No."
Then she'd be dead.
It will be over.
Every regretful act.
Every calculated contingency she placed for after her death, she wouldn't even get to see if they worked..
Nothing would matter.
Nothing.
" 'No…' so, you've made your choic—"
That's when Itachi leaned forward, pulled his mask down, and plummeted her lips onto his.
It was something she admittedly couldn't stop herself from doing. Even though she knew it was nowhere near romantic.
Note… his lips tasted of cherry.
Something hit the grass floor, maybe it was the katana, but Itachi couldn't remember.
For a second he hesitated, though his body gave in tilting her head to the side to angle the kiss better, she could feel his tongue as the sensation of having the one you have a slight infatuation for sent, euphoric pulses through her body.
And for a few seconds, they slowly went at each other.
For a few seconds, maybe she forgot about her entire life up until that moment.
She wasn't so experienced in PDA.
Or whatever the correct terminology was.
What was she doing?
If her father was alive to see her doing this with Kakashi of all people-
When his hands found their way to her butt she allowed it to linger a moment before pulling away in a string of saliva and readjusting his hands to her waist.
And there, covered in mist and surrounded by trees they just looked at one another with heavy huffs.
They embraced and she didn't know quite why he returned it so easily, but she gladly accepted the feeling nostalgic—something she hadn't felt since—Konoha.
"No…" with a stare like he'd seen a feral ghost Kakashi jumped back and put his hands together "Kai!"
And with that, he took his warmth away.
His chest no longer pressed onto hers.
Itachi stepped back with a hand on her hip, though she didn't really know what to say. She kept her typical face and took a deep breath "I think we've been through this already."
Through his mask she could see the conflict, Kakashi stared down at his gloved hand, unsure if he trusted his own senses, "Again…?"
The former heiress to the Uchiha clan looked at him, but she understood.
Kakashi was a ninja of valor, every ounce of Itachi's actions were detestable—so long as he's unaware of the truth.
But why did he respond back to her kiss in such a passionate way?
Well, she guessed he was still a guy, elite shinobi or not.
Huh…too many questions.
A hawk circled around them, letting out a few kakas.
Kakashi looked up, no doubt the bird coming from his comrades.
Meaning it was time for Itachi to exit before any backup began arriving.
With a flick of her hair, she asked one last thing "Will that family who lost their daughter receive proper aid?"
It caught him off guard, but nonetheless, he answered with a nod but then asked "What is this game you're trying to play with me? I'm not having it—"
But she didn't wait for him to finish. In a flurry of crows, she was gone, absent of the knowledge of what was going to happen to that family or when the next time she'd see her longtime crush.
Maybe never again…
Maybe Sasuke would get to her first.
Things would be fine, she needed to prepare to rendezvous with Juzo, sometime later, anyways.
Shinobi rarely ever got to live any part of the life they truly desired.
She was just glad she got to exist in her fantasy even for just one tick on the clock.
And so, the S-classed criminal pushed all of those bundled-up emotions she felt when she was him and continued on her way down the empty dirt road.
Only to be left wondering if perhaps she had acted in a way that may be a bit detrimental to her mission?
Well, only time would truly tell.
A/N: And I hope you guys enjoyed this installment. If you have Comments, complaints, concerns, suggestions leave them below in a review.