I don't own twilight.
also please note that I do have dyslexia. I'm not ashamed of it because it is something I cannot control but I am self-conscious about it. so a lot of my words are misspelled and many, many of the sentience's are a little back to front. I can't tell you the number of times I've gone to reread something that I have written but couldn't even understand what I was trying to say.
Please leave comments and listen to the songs if you haven't already heard them.
Be my baby chapter 10
Sunny By Boney M.
Leah shifted slightly in the big king-sized. She inhaled as she nested herself deeper in to the bed, hugging the pillow. The events of the night before flashed in her mind.
The tender kisses.
The gently touches.
His strong hands were in her hair.
She lazily smiles and reaches over to feel the other side of the bed. But instead of feeling the tracker her finger only feels the silk and satin of the deep purple bedspread. She rolled over as best she could, making sure not to land on her baby bump. Leah grabbed a hold of the pillow on his side of the bed and buried her nose in to it. her need to smell him every once and while still hadn't ceased. His scent still made her feel less sickly and her body feels stronger, not to mention his smell did start to make her happy of late.
'he's probably out feeding'. She shuttered, understanding she wasn't able to do anything about that. the she wolf sat up and stretched out her spine, giving her baby bump a rub. "morning baby". she said looking down at her stomach. She hopped off of the bed and began to pace around the room as she began to talk to her belly while rubbing circles with both off of her hands. "I got some good news for you Little Awesome. It looks like your daddy is gonna be your daddy". the baby kicked making her laugh. "yeah, yeah I know… cool right". she didn't know what had come over her but for the first time in years she left weightless. It was like all of the anger and stress she had carried for so long had just fallen off of her shoulder like drops of rainwater falling off of leaves on a wet day. the she wolf felt as if she could breathe again with feeling a sharp pain in a bit of her stomach. Nowadays it was only the kicks of teeny tiny toes. She hadn't meant to fall for the tracker, and she sure as shit knew the tracker hadn't meant to fall for her. but at this moment in time she truly, truly, truly couldn't care less. She didn't care what her pack thought, and she sure as shit couldn't give a damn if they thought the couple was an abomination or not. Because for the first time in years she felt free. She looked back down at her tummy. "it looks like the leech it gonna be around for a while now. and he's gonna teach you so many things. He's gonna teach you how to speak Italian. And he's gonna teach you how to throw a ball just like when mummy's daddy taught me". she smiled at the thought of her late father. Remembering all the good times. It was the first time in a long time she didn't feel like she was going to cry over his passing. Every other time in the past when he'd come in to her mind, the she wolf felt like she wasn't able to hold it together for long until the waterworks began. it didn't make it any easy being in a pack full of boys who didn't get it. But even when she would see in to their pea brain minds that a few of them blamed her for what happened to Harry Clearwater.
'you'd think sharing a mental link would give them some clue about how I would have been feeling. But that didn't stop the mean jabs and cruel glares. I couldn't understand why they rally around Seth but would cast me aside. I don't know, maybe it was because he was younger and to the pack, young boys needed a father. Or maybe it was because all of the pack loved my father and not to secretly blame me for his death. The day he and Charlie went out hurting…. The day he died. he and I had plans to go to the movies. I can't remember what we were going to see, but I guess that doesn't matter anymore right. but that morning I had seen Emily and Sam together at the store. They were in the sweets isle picking out different types of chocolate, I noticed that Emily was holding a packet of popcorn and Sam had a six-pack of Coke in his hand while the other hand was looking around her waist. He had his nose in her hand and began to kiss up her cheek. The moment I had turned the corner and saw them I completely froze in place. I put it together a minute later. That son of a bitch stole our movie night and made it hers. Every week when we were together Sam and I would meet up either at my house or his and watch a movie. I remember the last movie we watched together was Walk The Line, but I guess that isn't important either. Our movies nights were my favorite day of the week. He's hold me close and tell me how much he loved me. and now he was doing that to her. he had the nerve to give her our special night without a second thought. It felt like my mind was in a loop, just continuously asking myself how could he have done this, why would he do this. Isn't it enough that she's going to be marrying him in the dress I should of worn, or she's been eating the cake that should have been mind, but she the bitch gets my movie night? I couldn't take it anymore and just left. The only reason I saw there was because I was picking some sweets for myself and dad that day. the cinema always had overpriced snacks. When I got home I slammed the front door shut alerting my parents that I was home. and I high-tailed it to my room and slammed that door too. I rested up against it and burst out in to tears, after a while I slid down it and crawled up in to a ball. I grabbed at my knees and pushed them in to my chest, burying my head in them. after some time my father come up and knocked on my door. he didn't want to come up right away, knowing I'd just turn him away. When he asked me if I was okay I could barely talk, was I able to choke out that I saw Sam and Emily He didn't say anything for a long moment, when he did speak again he told me that he wasn't feeling well and that it might be best to put off the movies for that day. I hadn't realized it at the time but he was making up an excuse not to go and putting the blame on himself so I wouldn't need to feel bad. He then said he was gonna go see him Charlie wanted to do something, making sure he added that the outside air may make him feel better. I choked out a thank you and before walking away from me…. for the last time he told me he loved me. and that was the last memory I have of him. they never came out and said it to my face but I could see in the pack's minds that some of them thought if I had just gone to the movies and sucked it up he's still been alive. It really fucking got to me that no one ever blamed Bella or the Cullen's. the red-headed bitch was their reasonability but they hadn't done shit. If they had stayed and finished her off along with her mate, my father would still be there with me. but nobody ever thought that. every time I'd bring that Bella bitch in to the conversation I'd just be told to shut the fuck off, to have Jacob rip off my head. because how dare any one ever say something against the great Bella. But I least I could be grateful for Seth… my baby bro. who would stick up for me from time to time? but when he didn't I guess I couldn't blame him too badly. He knew the treatment I was facing wouldn't just come to an end he was were to stand up and say something. Everything was too far gone for that. At least he didn't blame for what happened. Leah took another deep breath, thinking That it was nice just to think of Harry as her dad and not her deceased dad. to think of the good times.
The she wolf looked back down at her stomach and grinned. "and I don't think I'd have it any other way". she felt a small, almost unnoticeable flutter under one of her hands. "ya know, once you've born…. When I'm able to look in to your little eyes. I'm going to tell you all about your grandfather. I'm gonna tell you all about how loving he was, and about how caring he was, and how he'd always, always, always put his wife and children first. I'm also going to share with you all the times…..". Leah almost jumped out of her skin when a pair of strong arms looped around her waist.
Demetri kissed her cheek and placed one of his hands on top of one of her that ley against her belly. "how long have you been awake for?". he asked.
"not long". She replied, Nuzzling her face in to his neck.
"how's are Little Awesome this morning?".
"awake and moving. Maybe we should reconsider changing Little Awesome's name to little Alarm Clock. Kicks me every morning at the same time. don't you, ya little kick boxer".
"so… last night". He kissed her ear. Leah could feel the tracker smile against her skin.
"was fun". She bit her lip.
"was amazing". He mused.
"was incredible".
"was the best I've ever had".
"fuck off, it was not". She turned around to face him." two thousand years and I'm the best you've ever had?". She shook her head. "no, nope, I don't believe that I'm calling bullshit".
"you drought my honesty?".
"completely". The she wolf cried.
"and why would that be exactly?". He stuck his nose up at her, crossing his arms.
"I hardly moved". She gestured down to her big melon belly "I can barely roll over on a good day". she laughed. "I have to get up to roll".
"Just think about how good the sex is gonna be when you're able to move around". he raised his eyebrows for a second then began to kiss up and down her cheek.
She laughed and tried to push him away. "stop it, if I laugh too much I pee".
"if you blink you pee". He said, his head buried in her neck.
A few more minutes went by "and now I have to pee, so get off of me". she grinned at him as she pushed him away from her. the she wolf shook her head as she made her way over to the large bathroom.
Demetri sat down on the side of the bed and turned on the T.V. he just got comfortable when Leah's phone started to go off. He reached for it and looked down at the caller ID.
Its big bright words flashed Jacob.
"Oh… the Alpha". He raised his eyebrows. 'wonder what he's calling for?'. for the first couple of weeks after Demetri and Leah had run off together all Leah had been getting for phone calls from her mum, her brother, her alpha, her Ex along with her cousin, and even Bella…. But only once. But after she never picked up…. except for Seth a couple of times. All of the phone calls eventually died down. He jumped off of the bed and made it for the bath room door.
Knock, knock, knock.
"Hey, you got a phone call". He said through the door.
"I'll call Seth back".
"it's not from your brother".
"Who then?". her voice took a sterner turn.
"It's Jacob, what you do think he wants?".
The toilet flushed and within a second she was back on the side of the door he was on… minus pants.
'why would he be calling, he stopped when he realized I wasn't gonna speak to anyone. Has something happened?. Is it Seth?, or Mum?'.
"are you going to answer?". The tracker asked.
"I…. I…. don't know". she frowned at her phone, Jacob's name still flashing on it.
"well if you are you better do it".
Leah throw caution to the wind and pressed answer. "Jake…. what's happened?, What's wrong?".
"Well hello to you too, person I haven't seen in almost two months". He replied dryly, not believing she actually picked up.
The she wolf didn't answer.
"nothing is wrong, I just wanted to see if you'd answer your phone or not".
She exhaled loudly making sure he knew she wasn't happy with him calling her. "what do you want?". She asked, more harshly than she meant to.
"to see if you were still alive".
"well, I'm alive. Bye Jake". the she wolf went to hang up the phone call.
"whoa, whoa, whoa don't even think about it". he stopped her.
"you know I didn't want to talk to any of you for a while. You know my boundaries".
"well then I'm sorry for not respecting your boundaries but I'm sick of not talking to you. Whether you like it or not you are my beta, it's my job to make sure you are safe and well, so if you want me to be sorry for that tuff luck".
She ruffed loudly.
"I just want to talk okay…. that's all I want… only a talk. Could you at least give me that?".
"fine". Leah gritted out through her teeth. She gave Demetri, telling him to give her some pricey. He nodded at her and left the room, knowing he'd be able to hear everything being said anyway. "okay…. talk". she sat down on the edge of the bed, where the tracker had only been sitting moments before.
"Okay, good". Jake said sarcastically. "well…. How have you been?".
"fine, fine never been better". She said it offhandedly but wasn't lying about how she was feeling these days. She was happy and had never been better. "you?".
"who cares about me". he replied. "you were the sick one. you were the one who had to be carried around everywhere".
"it was not everywhere". She rolled her eyes. "well I don't need to be carried around anymore, so don't worry about that".
"but have you gotten any better?... Lee you were really freaking bad. We were all worried for you…".
She cut him off. "you don't need to be worried anymore, I'm a lot better than I was. I'm still sickly". She rubbed at her stomach. "But I'm not as bad anymore, if anything I'm thriving". She squinted to herself wondering if that was the right word for it.
"then if your not as back are you gonna come back home?. to your mum….. and your brother….. and your pack… and me?".
"Jake it isn't that easy".
"Why? why isn't it that easy?". He asked gently.
"because". the she wolf hissed, closing her brown eyes tightly.
"Lee that isn't an answer and you know it. now freaking spill or else".
"because I'm…..". she forced herself to stop talking, before she said what she wanted to say. "because I'm happy here where I am. I have a system here ya know. I wake up when I want to, I watch whatever I want on the T.V. I put my yogurt in the fridge and no one eats it. it doesn't constantly smell like boy stink. No one is in my mind…. I have a freedom here that I have never gotten anywhere else. In my life. I don't feel alone, I don't feel like I'm gonna wake up 'feeling that I'm gonna have another disappointing day or disappoint another person. I can get up every morning knowing I won't be called a bitch and a harpy…. ".
Jacob flinched on the other end of the phone. guilt flooding through his body because he was the one to give her the title of a harpy.
"where I am now I feel validated….. I feel safe in a way I never truly did on the Rez….. or with you". she flinched at her own words, not wanting to say them but she felt like she had to make him understand. "I didn't feel listened to….. and I didn't feel cared about. I felt like my feelings were just tossed to the side and disregarded, like rubbish from an old bin. And even when all you could see in to my mind…". the she wolf sniffled. "none of you chooses to acknowledge….. all the pain I was going through". she took a deep breath, steadying herself before she went on. "for the first time since becoming the monster I did I don't feel like that monster. It isn't only better for my sickness if I say away from the Rez for while…. It's better for me".
"Leah…..I….I…. never meant to…".
"Jacob….. there were so many times I wanted to end it… so any time I just wanted it to end already. I was so done for the longest time, and I was ready for it to be done too. I'd lay on my bed at night…. And stare up at the ceiling…. And just…. fantasize about cliff jumping….. and never coming back to the surface. I would daydream about sinking to the bottom of the ocean, and the last thing my eyes would see was the light from the sun getting further and further away from me as I sank….. if the sun ever came out in La Push that is". she whipped a teardrop from her cheek. Then composed herself again as if nothing had happened.
"Leah….. I'm sorry". He said solemnly.
"Jake it's okay… I'm not looking for an apology. But if your gonna understand why I'm not coming back right away I have to say this. none of this is meant to hurt you… but I need you to get it".
"Lee….. I don't know what to say…".
"then don't say anything…. Let's just….. let's just talk about something else okay. your kind of ruining the happy buzz I had on this morning". she lightly chuckled.
"it's nice to hear you laugh again". He said quietly.
"it's nice to laugh again".
There was an awkward silence
Until Leah had, had enough.
"so….. how's the rest of them?".
"do you mean the Cullen's?".
"maybe". She shrugged.
"well, Ness is doing fine. You know how your brother and mother are doing. The pack is doing what the pack does. the Cullen's haven't changed. Bella and Edward are doing good but I guess you couldn't care less about Bella if you tried could you".
"Aaaah, you're finally leaning".
there was a bit of a pause. "did you wanna know how Sam is?".
"Yeah, why not".
"Really?". He hadn't seen that coming.
"Yes Jacob, really". She rolled her eyes again.
"Are you sure?".
"Jake I honestly don't mind. I've been over Sam and Emily for some time now". she smiled down at her baby bump. "so what's going on with them".
"Leah….. the wedding has been moved up. Sam has…. Leah, wants to move on with his life. He wants to Marry Emily and one day have kids with her. ever since you left…. Ever since you left everybody has been….. the mood here hasn't been great. We're all tense and on edge. Seth kept blaming Paul for you leaving saying if he were nicer to you, you wouldn't have gone. Sue was a mess for a while and even people on the Rez were giving Emily bad looks. Saying that she and Sam were the reason you ran off. there's just been a lot of talks, it's really brought down Emily and Sam just wants to make her happy…. so in the next two weeks their gonna tie the knot". Jake braced himself.
"well if it's gonna make her happy he should do it". she said without hesitation.
"okay Lee what happened to you?". he asked in disbelief. 'this can't be the same girl who would scream at Sam and Emily every time she would make her way down to the beach and see them together. The same girl who would constantly bring up what Sam did to make us all uncomfortable just to punish….. and us for not seeing it. The same girl who we all made sure she knew she was in the wrong for doing so'. Jacob winced again. 'if I could go back and attempt to see it from her perspective I would. Leah it right, none of us acknowledge what she had been going through and what had been done to her. of Couse we all knew what had happened to her but none of the pack took the time to try and care. In our minds because Sam had imprinted on Emily we all really thought that Lee should have just got over it and let it go. I see how wrong we all were now. maybe if I hadn't been so obsessed with Bella I would have seen things more clearly. Maybe if I didn't just agree with the rest of the pack about the things Leah was doing, instead of trying to see it for myself then I could have done something about it. of Couse now I see it for what t was. Leah was just a broken girl who wanted others to see how she was suffering. I don't think she really wanted to upset up everyone and make everyone uncomfortable. All Lee wanted was for all of us to see where she was coming from. To acknowledge that she had been caused pain and that her pain mattered just as much as everybody else's… but we couldn't even give her that.
She laughed again. "what happened?. I just told you, what are you deaf?. I'll say it even slower for you". she cleared her throat. "I….am…..over….Sam. I…have….no…reason….to…be…..jealous. I…..am…..happy…for….them..".
"Oh my god, please speak normally".
"Jacob….. if they want to be happy and start their life together I hope they go ahead. Ans if you could do me a soiled, and spread the word that I left to take a really well-paying job somewhere where it's always sunny and people have diamonds on their shoes that would be great".
"why?... and are you?. is that why you left?". Of Couse, Jacob didn't really believe that was why his beta left the Rez but felt he had to ask anyway just to make sure.
"no, but I'd rather have all the nosy people on the Rez believe that, rather than believing my whole existence evolved about Sam. I don't need everyone thinking I've left for attention, I don't need people thinking I'm trying to be hard to get". The She Wolf said the last part sarcastically. "I want people to know I'm my own person and the not angry, jilted, pathetic Ex who he can't escape from. I don't want to be chained to them forever and to only be known as the girl who was left for her cousin slash best friend".
"Lee nobody thinks…..".
"Everybody thinks of that like that". she laughed. "Jake we grew up in the same place with the same people, and you really think I don't know how it works on the Rez".
The alpha chuckled in agreement. "okay…. maybe your not too far off. "but I'm sure that not everybody who lives on the Rez thinks that way about you".
"other than most of them". she grumbled.
"I think you're making too big a deal out of this. But I'll tell the guys to spread the word if it makes you happy". He agreed.
"it will, thank…". But before Leah could say anything else the baby kicked so hard it sent her to the floor and off of the king-sized bed. "Ouch shit". She cursed. Demetri was right next to her in a second.
"Leah what happened? are you alright?". Jacob's voice sounded panicked. 'what? was she hit by a bus or something?'.
"yeah, Jake I'm fine". She grabbed at her belly. "just….. stubbed my toe".
"then what was that bang?".
'shit'. She thought trying to come up with something. "listen I'm just going to call you back later okay". she told him as Demetri helped her back on to the bed.
"but Lee…".
The she wolf didn't let him finish. She hung up the phone and throw it somewhere on the bed.
"That was a big one". Demetri said to her.
"yeah it…". before she could finish another hard kick almost sent her out of the tracker arms and back on to the floor. "SHIT, FUCK". Leah yelled. She lifted up her shirt to see a rather large red, purple, and black mark on her skin.
"you can't go on like this, it will only get worse".
"Oh, how would you know". she hissed at him with a glare.
He took no notice. "you need a doctor".
"I just need to lay down. The kicking only gets bad like this when I'm up and moving around, or doing something for long periods of time".
"you weren't moving around you were sitting on the bed".
"yeah, but I was talking on the phone".
"none of that makes the scene".
"it's just because I was doing something when it wanted me to rest okay".
"no, it's not okay".
"don't stress me out". She glared up at him. "it will only kick me harder if I'm stressed out because then it gets stressed out". She said through clenched teeth.
"just….". he didn't know what to do for her. "just… at least let me make you comfortable". He grabbed some pillows and placed them behind her back. positioning her upright so she could sit up with him. He rushed in to the kitchen and ran back holding a glass of water. "here drink this".
"I'm not thirsty".
"drink it". he insisted.
She took it from him and after a few gulps drowned down the whole thing. "thank you". she passed it back to him and he placed it on the bedside table.
"I don't want you leaving the hotel anymore okay".
"Demetri…". she said gently.
"I won't leave you". he said looking in to her eyes. "I've fed enough to hold me off for a while". She flinched. "you want food we'll get room service. You want to go for a walk, we'll walk up and down the hallways. You want excitement I'll let you push the buttons in the elevate. But I want you as close to this bed as you can be in the week couple of weeks". He reached over and held her hand. "and when the baby is born we can go wherever you want….. even back to forks if it makes you happy".
"Demetri".
He gazed up at her.
"do you know how to deliver a baby?".
There was a pause. "how hard can it be".
"that doesn't make me feel reassured". She smirked.
"All you'd need to do is push it out and I catch it".
"I think there's more to it than that". she said rubbing his shoulder.
"then there's YouTube videos for everything nowadays right".
"sweet Jesus".
"Leah…".
"when the time comes I don't want you anywhere near me". she shook her head.
He chuckled. "look what I got". He left the room and was back within seconds, holding something in his cold hands. He placed it down on the bed next to The She Wolf.
"books". She said to herself picking up one of them.
"baby books, I picked them up while you were flirting with that man". He took his seat next to her.
"I was hardy flirting". She began to flip throw the pages of one of them. "how did you get those without me noticing?".
"easy….. your very self-involved". Demetri joked, cheeking his fingernails.
She smacked him on the arm and continued to look throw the books.
"there's even one on how to deliver". He picked up one of them and flicked to the page. Pointing it out to her. "see…. We got this shit". He flung his arm around her and pulled her in to him.
She snorted. "why didn't I think of getting baby books while at a library".
"as I said….. you are very self-involved".
Esme and Carlisle.
"HE'S GETTING AWAY". Esme yelled to her husband while running throw the forest.
"LEAVE ME ALONE CARLISLE". The English vampire yelled over his shoulder.
"ALISTAIR…. PLEASE WE ONLY WANT TO TALK".
"BUGGER OF ESME". The beautiful motherly vampire looked around to see her husband had disappeared. 'where did eh go'. She thought But continued to chase down their old friend.
"ALISTAIR PLEASE STOP RUNNING FROM US".
"NO". he shouted back angrily.
Had it taken the married couple almost two months but they had finally tracked the tracker down. It turned out the doctor was right. the English vampire was hiding out in the woods close to Yorkshire, living in a cave away from society. Feeding on lone hikers who unfortunately came his way. of course, once they began to close in on him he felt their presents immediately. The moment Alistair realized he had let his guard down he was out. Leaving Esme and Carlisle to chase him down for the better part of two days. He didn't want anything more to do them after the Volturi scare. Though he felt bad for leaving his friend the way he did, he still didn't want anything to do with them as long as they were on Aro's list. So once he sensed his friends were looking for him, he decided he didn't want to get involved with whatever they had done this time.
"I DON'T WANT TO GET INVOLVED IN YOUR SHIT ESME".
"YOU WON'T, WE'RE NOT IN TROUBLE, SO JUST STOP RUNNING".
But luckily for Esme, her wish come faster than she thought it would. just as it looked like Alistair was going to getaway. Carlisle came out of the trees and tackled him to the forest floor. he quickly got on top of him, not giving his friend time to do anything about it. "Alistair old friend…. it's good to see you". the doctor said, giving Alistair a friendly smile. Esme caught up to them and smiled down at the tracker as he looked up at them both with a defeated look on his face.
"oh, bugger".
Please read Notes, very important.
JB. Campbell: don't worry I'm still gonna be updating my other story's, I just wanna focus on this one for now since I'm on a roll. until another wave of grieving hits.
Hey, I hope you all like this chapter. It is a littler shorter than the last one but I just wanted to get it up. I'm hoping to get the next one up soon but the next few weeks may be a bit busy for me. because of Christmas and my birthday is coming up. it will also be the first Christmas and birthday without my dad, so I'm not sure what my mind set will be like in the next couple of weeks. It will be hard But I have my sisters, my mum, and other family. So I'm hoping it won't be too bad.
I was going to post this sooner but ended up being real busy. The day after I posted the last chapter I was able to write 4000 words on this chapter. Then for about a week ended up house-sitting for my sister, cos she and her partner went to kangaroo island for their 10 year anniversary. I spend most of the time looking after their dog Kaiser. Beautiful dog. it's kind of funny the first night I stayed here Kaiser throw up all over the bed….. while I saw in it. poor thing. But he's fine, he ended up being ok. So because I had a lot of time I ended up going back and trying to re-edit my other story. I haven't had the chance to do this one yet or he Who Haunts The Attic, because it isn't letting me, not sure why, but I'll figure it out. I'm not sure if any of you read my story Angler, if not place cheek it out. I went back and reedited all of that. I have made some notes of things I need to go back to and change, that I missed. But I think I've gotten a pretty big chunk of that done.