Omg, thank you so much frankannestein, Kagz419 and EmilyAnnMcGarrett-Winchester for the amazing reviews! And thanks to everyone who's reading this fic. I appreciate it so much.

Writing the latest chapter was such a high, and getting so much praise for it - it meant the world to me. I can't thank you enough.

I'm sorry it took me so long to continue writing and updating, but here we are at last. Please, if you like what you read - write a review.

"You almost got your boyfriend killed."

Joe said it as it was, as a fact, not like an accusation - but Jackie felt the burning dagger of guilt in her gut nevertheless.

"I didn't mean to." She managed, her mouth as dry as the Saharan desert.

"Well, you can't afford to have these kinds of accidents anymore. You're in love with a human. They can die. That's the price you pay."

"I know."

And fuck, did she know? She knew it with a core-wrenching horror that was unlike anything she had felt in centuries. With fear and terror and self-loathe so profound it made her want to claw off her skin.

Jackie hadn't felt like this since her mother had been burnt alive in front of her eyes, and she'd been unable to do anything about it. The smell of burning human flesh and appletrees was suddenly fresh in her nose, her gut was a tight knot in her throat and she wanted to scream and cry and kill herself.

For being a fucking stupid, useless piece of shit.

For putting Sam's life in danger.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Had you not let him into your life, had you stayed firm and slammed the door on his face, he'd be safe now. Nothing like this would've happened to him if it wasn't for you.

She was leaning her back on the wall, and Joe was crouching by her side sliding her hands on her skin, closing the wounds one by one, healing her with her heavenly powers-

Another thing Jackie knew she didn't deserve. Grace.

With a sigh, she turned her tired eyes off Joe and took a look at Sam.

He was lying on the floor on his back, a small distance away, his chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. Joe had healed him first - and only then had Jackie, who had been sinking in an ocean of pain, slipping in and out of consciousness, realized that Sam had been hit, that Sam was in danger, that he was bleeding and dying, and-

That thought tasted like acid on her lips, and Jackie sucked in the tears that followed.

Sam had almost been killed because of her, and she didn't need Joe to tell her that. She would see him like this, lying on the floor, bloodstains on his high cheekbones, for the rest of her life.

You knew he'd get hurt because of you. You knew it from the start, and you just didn't care.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

"You have to stop doing this shit." Joe's voice brought Jackie back to the moment. "You have enough money - or if you don't I'll be happy to give you some. You know I don't really need it-"

"It's not about the money."

"Then what is it? The excitement? The adrenaline rush? Because-"

But just then Joe's hands moved over a broken bone on her hip, and Jackie cried out with pain as the burning glow moved from Joe's palm to her skin, to the torn flesh. She felt the bone reforging, the tissues growing back together, and it hurt like hell.

"Fuck, Joe-!"

"Don't be a baby. I'm almost finished-"

"Christ-!"

At that moment she realized that Sam had opened his eyes - dark hazel eyes with a hint of green, and he was looking at her like he wasn't quite sure where he was. Blood on his face, golem dust on his hair - and still he was so beautiful it cut through Jackie's chest like a blade and left her breathless.

"Sam-" she whispered. "My God, Sam-"

Sam blinked his eyes a couple of times, his eyes moving from Jackie to Joe as he struggled to sit up.

"Are you a doctor?" he asked.

"Oh, I'm a vet actually," Joe said, letting go of Jackie. "Are you feeling okay, kid?"

"Mhhh, yeah, I guess." he ran his fingers through his hair. "What… what happened?"

You almost died. Because of me. And I shall never forgive myself.

Jackie couldn't bear to say that out loud, she couldn't even bear to look at Sam. It hurt too much. It felt like her heart was being ripped out through her throat and that she'd throw it up on the floor any minute now. She closed her eyes and leaned her back on the wall as if her life depended on it.

"You were going to die," Joe replied, realizing Jackie wasn't going to answer Sam's question. "Getting hit by a golem will do that to you. You got a rib through your lungs, and were drowning in blood by the time I got here."

"Shit-" Sam gasped as if suddenly remembering, and then: "Jackie, Gods-! Jackie, are you okay-?"

"I'm fine." she forced herself to speak, forced her eyes open. Sam was by her side now, his hands on her shoulders - hesitating, as if he didn't know if he dared to touch her, but as if he wanted nothing more than to pull her into his arms.

Another thing she didn't deserve.

"But you were… Your arm-" Sam's voice broke, he had to clear his throat. "You were dying. Your arm was broken."

"Yeah."

"But how-?"

"Joe." Jackie nodded towards her sister. "She can heal people."

"Mostly animals," Joe noted drily. "But you guys aren't that different."

Sam blinked a couple of times, taking in that information. His hand moved gently down Jackie's arm, his eyes following, noticing the place where her humerus had torn through the skin, and where now only a faint, red scar marked that spot.

"That's incredible," Sam said silently.

"Aren't you supposed to be a hunter?" Joe asked. "I bet this isn't the most incredible thing you've ever seen."

"Hunting, right." Sam snorted. "Doing that, I only saw things that try to kill people. But you saved my life. And Jackie's too. How?"

"I'm awesome that way. Just buy me a beer and we're even." Joe said and stood up. She brushed the golem dirt off her knees, but her white lab coat was stained with dust and blood, and she looked exhausted, even if she tried to hide it. But Jackie saw - even if Sam probably didn't - she saw the dark circles under her eyes, saw how she had to lean on the wall with a hand, to hide the fact that she was wobbly on her feet.

Using so much grace would do that to her, Jackie knew, with another wave of guilt and shame. She knew it would take days for Joe to get her strength back.

Sam had turned his eyes back at Jackie, his gentle hands moving on her skin, feeling the places she'd been broken but wasn't anymore, as if he still had a hard time believing they had both missed the death he had already held certain.

"I thought you were going to die," Sam said, his voice throaty and low. "And me too."

Jackie couldn't reply anything to that.

Saying that she was sorry felt like an understatement of the century.

You should tell him to leave. Tell him to leave now and never come back.

That is the life he wants. The safe apple-pie life. He doesn't deserve to die because you're a careless lunatic. If you love him, tell him to go. Now.

But saying that out loud felt like dying, and Jackie knew that if she spoke she'd start crying. And she wasn't going to do that in front of Joe.

Joe gave her a curious glance, and Jackie knew she probably guessed what was going through her mind. Joe always knew, damn her. She knew her too well.

"You would've died, boy," Joe said, after a small silence. "And such a shame it would've been - to die because of stupidity."

"Stupidity?" Sam said, arching his brows.

"Yes! For a geek, you aren't that bright. Next time you see a golem - you run. And not towards it!"

"No way I was gonna run away," Sam stated. "It would've killed Jackie."

"I might have healed," Jackie said silently. "Joe is right, you should have run. You should've left me."

Sam's broad chest rose as he took in a deep breath, his eyes were suddenly dark.

"You were unconscious. And that thing-" his throat bobbed. "It was gonna rip you apart."

Jackie avoided Sam's eyes.

The truth was, that his words scared her. To be ripped to pieces, to die like that—

She hadn't been this close to death in a long time, and no matter how many times She had talked about wanting to die (sometimes joking, sometimes not), now that it had been this close—

Well, it wasn't a pleasant thought.

To die like that, and just because she'd been stupid, reckless, and distracted. Taking risks like her life wasn't worth shit.

Not thinking about Sam at all.

And her thoughts had gone full circle, from her own death (unpleasant, but it was bound to find her someday) to Sam, to the worst moment of her life, Sam lying on the floor, choking on his blood and she had been unable to do a thing about it. Hadn't it been for Joe, Sam would be dead now.

Just the thought of it made Jackie feel like there was a black hole in the place of her heart.

Joe gave a sigh. "Fine, Sam, a knight in shining armor saving the damsel in distress. So, you saved Jackie's life - by calling me. And that's what you should've done in the first place. Not go and try fighting off a golem with your fragile human fists."

"I managed to kill it, you know," Sam said.

"Yes - you got lucky," Joe replied. "That happens a lot to stupid people. Just imagine what would've happened if Jackie hadn't had an ang-"

"But I had." Jackie interrupted Joe mid-word. "I had an ancient magical blade. And Sam used it to kill the golem, so save your lecture."

"An ancient magical blade?" Joe snorted. "Really?"

"Is it not?" asked Sam, glancing at the angel blade that lay in the middle of the pile of clay that had been the golem.

"Oh, it is, no doubt about that. A real treasure - can kill anything," said Joe with the tone Jackie knew all too well. The tone that told her Joe was sick of her shit and couldn't wait to get out of here.

"Joe-" she started, but then closed her mouth.

What was there to say?

Joe had told her a thousand times that she needed to come clean to Sam. She hadn't, and it had almost gotten him killed. And yet, still, she was keeping secrets from him.

But how can I tell him? How can I tell him about my mom and Castiel and the blade and all the secrets of Heaven?

The only thing I should tell him is to walk out of that door and not look back.

Her silence spoke louder than words, and Jackie knew Joe followed her trail of thoughts.

"I think I'm gonna go," Joe said. "I bet you two have things to talk about."

Sam's hands were still on Jackie's shoulders, as he turned to look at Joe, then gave a sigh and stood up.

"Joe, you saved our lives," he said, offering his hand. "I still don't understand how, but… Thank you."

Joe made an amused snort but shook his hand.

"My pleasure. You should get some rest, though. I might have fixed you, but you need to give your body the time to heal properly. And Jackie too - maybe you want to make sure she stays in bed at least for 24 hours? And I mean resting, you know, not snuggling."

Sam seemed to blush slightly at that, and Jackie rolled her eyes.

"Where you gonna go?" she asked. "It's not like you can teleport to Alaska in that state, and my couch is ruined, thanks to the golem."

"I'm gonna get a room. This is a hotel, isn't it?"

"Okay." Jackie nodded. "And Joe… thank you. What you did today-"

"Don't mention it." Joe shrugged, but something softened in her eyes. "But Sam - I won't always be there. Next time - you run away from the golem, got it?"

"Yeah, okay. I got it."

"Good. Nice abs, by the way."

Sam's jaw dropped - but he couldn't form an answer in the time that took Joe to walk out of the room.

"Nice abs?" He turned to look at Jackie.

Damn, he was cute when he was confused. No matter how rotten she felt, Jackie couldn't help the impish grin on her lips as she answered.

"Joe needs to touch skin to be able to heal. You should've seen her face when she lifted your shirt and laid her hands on your abs, honey. I bet it was the most exciting thing that has happened to her in centuries."

A blush, a deep shade of scarlet crept onto Sam's high cheekbones.

"You're kidding right?"

"Not so much," Jackie replied. "And Joe was right about one other thing too."

"About what?"

"That we need to talk."

At that, the smile on Sam's lips disappeared. He was so tall, looking down at her from his heights, his face pale and serious and young, his eyes so deep and dark that Jackie felt like falling like she could fall into those eyes forever and forever and forever.

"Yeah, I think so too," he said. "You owe me some answers."

(In case you were wondering, the chapter title is a song by System of a Down.)