Six - Homeward Bound
Jackie stood next to Steven in the waiting room, clutching his arm to her body. She loved having the ring around her neck, but right now she wanted to distance herself from all evidence she and Steven were married. If they were caught, they'd be in so much trouble.
The desk clerk, a stout and familiar looking woman, finally came out of the back office, veil and bouquet in hand. The veil looked very similar to the one Jackie had on in their wedding photos. She wanted to get the hell out of this place before anyone recognized her and Steven.
Fate, however, had other plans. Plans that involved screwing Jackie over.
"Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Hyde! Let me just say, your ceremony last night was one of my favorites to watch. It's not often couples here are as clearly in love as you are!" the desk clerk said with a bright smile.
Jackie smiled, because she frankly could not believe this woman had said that. Or that she and Steven had been so incredibly bad at keeping their marriage a secret.
"What the hell is she talking about?" Red asked with a disbelieving smile.
Eric and Donna exchanged a look, then looked at Jackie and Hyde. It was then that Jackie realized all eyes were on them. "Um…"
"Well, you know… a lot can happen in one night," Steven said.
"Especially when you're drunk," Michael added helpfully. Jackie swore to herself that she would kill him later.
Red nodded. "So… if I'm reading between the lines correctly, you all got drunk. And these two dumbasses decided to get married."
"Without me!" Mrs. Forman cried.
"Maybe," Steven said. "But who's to say what really happened?"
"Me!" Fez said, raising his hand. "I only had one drink the whole night."
They all looked at him. "So? What happened?" Red asked.
"Oh, I don't know, I was with Kelso the whole time," Fez said.
"That's true," Michael said. "I don't really know what we did, but we were together the whole night."
Red was turning pinker by the minute, which Jackie knew meant he was getting angrier by the minute. They were in so much trouble.
"I am so sorry," the desk clerk said. "I did not know the, um… situation. However, we do need to get on with this ceremony. I do have other clients. I am so, so sorry."
Red thrust a finger at Jackie and Steven. "I'll deal with you later. For now, we're gonna watch Bob and Joanne get married and we're all gonna ignore anything that happened last night."
They all nodded. The clerk gave Joanne the veil and bouquet. She let everyone in but Joanne and Mrs. Forman, the maid of honor. Jackie sat next to Steven in a pew next to Eric and Donna. Kelso and Fez were across the aisle.
Bob stood with Red at the altar. Wedding procession music started, and Mrs. Forman walked down the aisle. She was soon followed by Joanne, who was smiling despite the scene Jackie and Steven had just made. Jackie was glad for that.
She hoped the ceremony was long, just so she could avoid her and Steven's inevitable demise at the hands of Red Forman for a little while.
Hyde and Jackie tried to break away from the others and escape Red's wrath, but fate seemed to be against them. Red and Kitty caught them in the hallway outside their room. Their friends gathered around to watch.
"What were you two dumbasses thinking?" Red asked.
Hyde looked at Jackie, then said, "We weren't thinking?"
"Damn right, you weren't. How the hell did Jackie convince you to do this?"
"He came up with the idea," Jackie said.
"You didn't need to tell him that," Hyde muttered. He shook it off and decided to just face Red. "Look, what happened happened. We're both fine with it, even today. It wasn't… ideal timing, but we can't go back and change it. It is what it is."
"Oh, I am not mad at you for getting married," Kitty said. "I'm mad at you for doing it without any of us there! We are your family and your closest friends, we deserved to witness this moment in your lives!"
"Sorry, Mrs. Forman. We agreed to do a vow renewal earlier today. You're invited to that," Jackie said.
"I better be," Kitty said.
"Well, that's not why I'm mad," Red said. "I'm mad because you two made one of the most important decisions of your life while you were drunk! You're supposed to be sure that you love each other before deciding to take this step. You can't be sure if you're drunk. Now, when you fight again like you always do, you won't be able to just break up. You realize that, don't you?"
"Yeah," Hyde said. "But we did it because we both wanted to be married. We knew that before last night."
"Exactly," Jackie agreed, lacing her fingers between Hyde's and standing closer to him. "We love each other, like you and Mrs. Forman love each other. Are you really gonna be mad at us for wanting to make our love official?"
Red sighed. "I guess not. If this ends in divorce, you're gonna get one hell of an 'I told you so.' Hopefully I'm wrong. And hopefully Bob and Joanne aren't too mad at you for almost ruining their wedding. I'll let them deal with you when they get back, though. For now, I'll let you all enjoy what little time you have left on this trip." Red stalked off towards the elevator, Kitty close behind.
"That was so ominous sounding," Forman said. "What little time we have left… Let's spend it talking about how Hyde got drunk and his first thought was to marry Jackie right away."
"Let's not do that," Hyde said. "What did you guys do last night?"
Donna shrugged. "Eric and I played strip poker in his room."
"Then we had sex," Forman said.
"Thanks for filling that in, I never would have guessed," Hyde said sarcastically. "Fez? Kelso?"
"I don't remember a lot of it, but I remember making out with someone," Kelso said.
"Yeah… About that…" Fez said. "It was me." The rest of them gaped at Kelso.
"What was you?" Kelso asked, apparently confused.
"I was the person you made out with."
"WHAT?" Kelso shrieked. "No way!"
"Yes, we made out. It was actually pretty good. I didn't expect a lot from you after Jackie told me you still only last two minutes during sex."
"When did she tell you that?" Kelso asked, his voice shrill.
Jackie stepped in. "My actual words were, 'I can't believe I ruined my relationship with Steven for two minutes of bad sex with Michael.' I didn't say it outright."
"Yeah, well, I bet I was better than Hyde!" Kelso said. Hyde raised his eyebrow at Kelso. Jackie gave him a look and shook her head. He relented. "Okay, fine, he probably is a little better than me. But I was good enough for Fez to make out with me, so there!"
"I don't know if that's really a big achievement," Forman said.
"Hey!" Fez said. "I'll have you know that I am great at making out."
"He is," Kelso said. "It's not gonna happen again, 'cause I was drunk and it didn't mean anything, but it was good."
Fez smiled. "Thank you. It was good."
"You sure it didn't mean anything?" Donna asked teasingly.
"Yes, I'm sure," Kelso said. "Now, what are we gonna do for the rest of the day before our flight home tomorrow?"
Forman grinned. "Let's burn Hyde for getting drunk and deciding to marry Jackie."
Jackie pulled her hand out of Hyde's and crossed the short distance between herself and Forman. She kicked him in the shin sharply. "You will not burn Steven for loving me! You have no right when you left Donna at the altar. Don't burn Steven just because you're a pathetic coward. My husband is a real man who knows what he wants." She turned away from Forman and smiled brightly at Hyde. "I love calling you my husband."
Hyde smiled back at her, then looked at Forman. "Well, me and my badass wife are gonna go celebrate our honeymoon. See you losers later." He offered his hand to Jackie, and she took it happily.
Jackie sat next to Steven in the airplane, holding his hand firmly, but not too tightly. She ran her thumb over the gold band on his ring finger. She'd closed the window screen already so that he could look over at her and not see how high off the ground they were.
"So, what do you want our first dance song to be?" Jackie asked. She was distracting him from the flight by asking him questions about their future vow renewal.
"I thought you had everything planned out," he said.
"Not everything. This is your wedding too."
He smiled softly at that. "Then, uh… Thank You by Led Zeppelin. That should be our first dance."
Jackie grinned. "I love that idea. And where do you wanna go for our honeymoon? The next one, at least."
Yesterday, Jackie and Steven had really celebrated their honeymoon. They had not wasted the little time they had left. The only non-honeymoon thing they did was talk to Bob and Joanne and apologize for making a scene right before their wedding. Luckily, neither of them were too mad. They'd even congratulated Jackie and Steven on their marriage.
"You can decide that," Steven said. "I don't care, as long as I'm with you."
A happy buzz rose in Jackie's chest. "Aw, Puddin! How about Paris? Then you wouldn't have to go to the beach or wear shorts."
"Sounds good."
They spent the rest of the flight making plans for their vow renewal. Jackie couldn't wait for the day she got her dream wedding. But if she was being honest, she was perfectly happy just being married to Steven without the big fancy ceremony. And she was excited for what would come next for them.