I stop as I was about to reap the first flower. These plants… I know them. Not from before when I couldn't say the difference between a weed and an herb and not from 10 where if I had saw them, I would have used to make my siblings crowns. No, I know this from another place.

The plant station in the training center.

I am sure of it. I made that test countless times. This is not only a beautiful flower. I am certain that it has poison. Poison enough to kill a child with only one leaf. The sap was even more dangerous. But it needs to be ingested or put into the blood to be deadly for an adult.

Deadly…

A smile rose from the corners of my lips.

Finally. I found my weapon.

If I can extract the poison out and cover my knives with them I can bane whoever is left. The plant is not going to kill them instantly, if I remember correctly it takes about five to ten minutes to take effect if it is eaten, but if I manage to put it into the blood flow it would be faster. Two or three minutes in the worst scenarios. Until them I am going to run. I am fast. If I can make someone play cat and mouse with me for a little while I can win. It is unlike that the gamemakers would interfere in the final confront. It is when there is more tension and the spectators are glue to their screens.

I pick my gloves. I really thought they would end up being useless, but you never know what you are end up needing in the arena.

I tried to reap from different parts of the glade, so if anyone else stumble upon it they wouldn't notice anything, and honestly even if they found it weird, I doubt they are going to recognize this plant. No one of the tributes left spent as much time as I did in the plant station, some of them have not even went there and the flowers are from district 6 so they would probably never saw them back home.

There was not enough day time to make the poison, and I would not risk it doing it when I can't see, but that night was the most relaxing I had since I enter in the arena. Now I could see a light in the end of the tunnel.

The girl from 3 died that night. She must have been smarter than I thought since during the training she was more interested into the systems behind the machines than the weapons, I don't think I saw her trying with anything sharp before, but she spent quite some time doing traps. Maybe that is why she survive so long. I doubt anyone was betting she would make so far. But again, I doubt someone bet I would be here today and this includes my family and mentors.

Capitolians normally bet on whoever they think is going to be the victor. People from districts, the one that don't have a family or simply don't care, bet in who they think is going to be reaped. Obviously, they don't do it open for everyone to see, at least not in 10, not because they think it may be disrespectful, but because if the person they put their money on ends up being reaped and someone point they out, they are going to be beaten until their almost dead.

And no one help these kinds of people. Not even the peacekeepers.

I didn't look which tribute was more likely to win before coming into the games. There was no need. I watched they training and saw their scores. I know them better than the capitolians. Seeing the betting would only made me more terrified and more prone to focused on one tribute rather than being afraid of all of them. But if my preparation team is one to be taken into consideration the boy from one and the girl from two are the favorites. They prove something is right since they are still alive. The final battle is going to be against one of them.

I don't know which one is the lesser evil. Aurelian is stronger and could kill me with his bare hands, but Augusta is faster and a smaller target, it would be difficult to escape from her until the poison takes effect.

I shake my head. I have to stop doing this. Being stuck inside my head. This is not a healthy thing to do. Right? I don't know anymore. But I can't give myself this luxury. I need to make the poison.

In the Before, I stopped worrying about chemistry and biology when I finished high school. I didn't have anything against them, but they didn't have anything to do with my major and the work I got after. This mean that it has been more than fifteen years that I don't do anything like this. I guess that if I can crush the plant until I can create a paste, I could cover my knives with them. This may work. But a paste can easily be washed of and I would need to be extra careful to keep it in the blades. Maybe if mix with a little bit of water I can turn the paste into a liquid and if I heat it up until it boiled and the water evaporate only a concentrate of poison will be left. I can scrape until I get a fine powder and them cover my blades with it. Yes, this is a better idea. Riskier since they could see the fire, so I would need to do a better coverage, maybe dig a hole so that would not have smoke, and also the poison can react with air and I would end up killing myself, but if it works, the poison is not going to leave my knives and it can reduce the time it takes to kill someone.

If I was out of the arena, maybe my choice would be different, but I am stuck inside. The last time I talked to a human being that didn't want to kill me was about two weeks ago, it has been almost three weeks since I last saw my family and isolation can make you do some stupid things, especially when I can almost taste the freedom at my reach, this is making me reckless.

But I can't care. I can feel that I am no longer the same person as I was before the games and I am sure that I would never come back to be that same girl that even thought was an old soul still had an innocence of a lifetime being sheltered from the ugliest parts of the human being.

And as I cover the last of my blades I can't stop, but wonder. If I survive, would I think that the me from right now was naïve? Would I still have hope in human kind after all I will mostly like go throw?

Would I be able to say that while Ophelia Gadeer made awful choices due to terrible circumstances, she was indeed a good person? Would I be able to move on?