We're in the home stretch here, people, and you know what that means. Time to get working on that happy ending.
Shout outs to callmeGreen-Eyes and bleuerili for taking the time to leave reviews.
Happy reading, and please let me know if you like it. =)
Chapter Six
When they arrived at Sam's office, a petite and pretty brunette omega woman was there with Sam. She gave off the refreshing scents of grass and wildflowers, but there was something steely in both her gaze and in the way she carried herself. This was not someone to underestimate. Dean liked her immediately, of course. She reminded him of Cas.
"This is my colleague, Eileen Leahy," Sam introduced her. "She also specializes in family law, and I think her input on your case would be helpful, if that's alright with you. Eileen is deaf, but she can lipread, and I can sign for you if necessary."
Dean couldn't help noticing the way Sam's hand lingered on his colleague's arm, or the way her summer meadow scent intensified at his touch. His first instinct was to tease his brother mercilessly, but he ruthlessly squashed it. He was here to support Cas. Plus, he knew that dating wasn't easy for guys like Sam. Too many alphas and omegas were only interested in betas for casual sex because of the 'built-in birth control'. If Sam really liked this woman and she liked him back, as appeared to be the case here, Dean would not be the one to jinx it.
Nevertheless, he couldn't resist saying innocently, "I didn't know you knew sign language, Sammy." He was a good brother, but he wasn't a saint.
"Eileen's been teaching me," Sam said, and his poker face was impressive. He only blushed a little around the ears.
"He's a very quick study," Eileen said, and her poker face was so impressive that Dean honestly couldn't tell if there was a double entendre in there or not.
"Of course it's alright," Cas said, reaching out to shake the other omega's hand. He made sure to face her fully and speak clearly but normally. "Thank you both so much for helping me. I can't tell you how much this means to me. I wish you would let me pay you."
Eileen gave a dismissive wave. "Don't be ridiculous. Any friend of Sam's is a friend of mine, and if you want to give someone money, we can recommend some reputable non-profits that need it a lot more than we do."
"Told ya," Dean chuckled.
"Thank you," Cas repeated. "I'd like the names of those organizations so I can pay it forward."
"I'll get you a list before you leave," Sam said. "First let's talk about how we're going to get your son back. Shall we sit?"
Any other lawyer's office would have imposing leather couches and armchairs, dull grey colors, and framed certificates and pictures of high-profile successful cases, but not Sam Winchester. He had cozy, mismatched sofas from thrift stores and flea markets, comfortable green and cream walls, and baskets of toys and picture books because the majority of his clients were single parents who couldn't always find or afford a babysitter. Dean always felt a warm rush of pride whenever he visited his brother here. Every inch of the place bore Sam's signature. The kid had done good.
"You know, Dean," Sam said as they all took seats, "I get why you didn't tell Dad, but you could have told me that the new boyfriend was Cas. I wouldn't have judged you. I told you I've known for years that you were in love with him."
Dean froze. He felt Cas go very still on the other half of the loveseat, but he didn't dare turn to look at the omega.
"Oh, shit," Sam said, sensing the sudden tension in the room. "I just put my foot in my mouth, didn't I?"
"Dean?" Cas said, and Dean had never heard his voice sound so small and uncertain. "Is… is that true?"
Dean desperately wished that he could lie, but Cas would see right through him like always. His long held secret…
It was out.
"I think we should give you two a minute to figure this out in private," Eileen said after a moment of horribly awkward silence, and she practically dragged Sam out of his own office, the door clicking closed behind them. Dean really liked her. If Sam wasn't dating her, then he should be.
"Dean, look at me." It was a plea, not an order. Cas sounded like he was on the verge of tears.
Dean forced himself to turn and face his best friend, his lover, his Dom… who might not be any of those things anymore. As he looked at Cas though, he finally registered that while the omega definitely looked like he'd just had the shock of his life, he didn't smell upset. His scent was all green leaves sparkling with fresh raindrops.
"Was Sam right?" Cas asked, something hopeful in his eyes and his voice.
Wide-eyed, Dean could only nod, his throat too tight for words.
A laugh burst out of Cas, a sound of pure disbelieving joy. "You're in love with me?"
Again Dean just nodded like an idiot. Five years he'd been dreaming of saying the words out loud, and now he couldn't remember how talking worked. Fortunately for him, Cas had better uses for Dean's mouth.
Dean could always lose himself in kissing Cas no matter what else was on his mind. Even the very first time, which had been messy and semi-drunk and involved more horny enthusiasm than technique, it had still felt like the world stopped spinning and nothing existed but the two of them, tongues and scents intertwining like they were made for each other. It had never felt so right with anyone else.
When they were forced to come up for air, they sat for a moment, their foreheads resting together, their breath warming each other's lips.
"Does that mean you—" Dean started to say.
"Yes, I love you too, dumbass. I've been in love with you basically since the day I met you."
"Well, why didn't you say something?"
"Because I thought you were this nice to all your friends, and I didn't want to make things uncomfortable between us. What was your excuse?"
"I thought you were out of my league, and I didn't want to lose you as a friend when you inevitably shot me down. So I guess we're both a couple of dumbasses."
"We got there in the end."
"Yeah. With a little help from my awkward moose of a brother."
"You know he hates it when you call him that."
"I know. Why do you think I do it?"
Cas shook his head fondly.
"So are we…" Dean brushed his thumb gently over the claiming bite. It had started to fade a little, but it was still sensitive enough that the light touch made Cas shiver with pleasure. "Are we doing this for real then?"
"Mating?"
"Yeah. I mean, we don't have to. If you're not ready for that, we can wait as long as you want."
Dean had never expected to even get to call Cas his boyfriend. He already felt like the luckiest alpha, the luckiest person, in the whole world just knowing that Cas loved him back. Did his inner alpha want to bite Cas as soon as possible and lock this down? Of course, but his inner alpha was a greedy, selfish bastard. Dean was better than that. Dean wanted his omega's enthusiastic consent. He didn't want Cas to do anything because he felt like he had to.
"I—" Cas clutched at Dean's shirt as though afraid he might vanish. "On the one hand, I've wanted you for my mate since before Jack was born, but on the other, I don't think we should rush into anything. If this is going to work, and I want so badly for this to work, Dean… there are things we need to talk about first."
Dean nodded. The rules and boundaries that had worked for them as friends with benefits wouldn't necessarily work for them as mates. They needed to make sure they were on the same page about all the important things before they took such a permanent step. They especially needed to decide if they would be monogamous from now on, or if they were still comfortable sharing and under what circumstances.
"But we shouldn't keep Sam and Eileen waiting any longer than necessary," Cas continued, "so let's have that conversation when we get home, okay?"
"Yeah, okay," Dean agreed.
Cas stood up to go let Sam and Eileen know it was safe to come back in. Pausing, he took Dean's face between his hands, and kissed him soundly on the lips. When he drew back, he was beaming. Dean had never seen or smelled him happier. "My good Alpha," he murmured softly as he had so many times before.
Something clicked in Dean's head, and his jaw dropped. All the times Cas had said those words as he looked at Dean with soft, warm affection; all the times Dean had wished they were a different three words and that the warmth in Cas' eyes was something more than just affection. "Oh my god! Have you been as-you-wishing me this whole time?"
Cas' smile turned into a shit-eating grin.
~o0o~
"Everything okay here?" Sam asked apprehensively as he and Eileen resumed their seats. "I really hope I didn't cause a problem."
"No, we're good," Dean said, and he put his arm around Castiel as though to prove it.
Castiel happily snuggled into his alpha's side. It felt even better now that he knew it meant as much to Dean as it did to him. Mine, his inner omega purred contentedly. My Alpha. All mine.
"Good," Sam said with relief. "Okay. Well, Dean's texts last night were a bit vague, and Eileen isn't as familiar with your history as I am, Cas. Would you mind walking us through how the custody arrangement with your brother and sister-in-law came to be and what made you decide to pursue legal action now?"
Some of Castiel's good mood evaporated as he was reminded of why they were all here, but even that couldn't completely quench the glow of joy inside him. Dean loved him. The world felt kinder and more hopeful than it had in a very long time. Clearly miracles did happen, so maybe with Sam and Eileen's help he could have one more. He laced his fingers with Dean's and felt Dean squeeze his hand reassuringly.
He made sure to look at Eileen when he began speaking. From the corner of his eye he saw Sam's hands moving, translating his words in case she missed anything.
"I had my son Jack when I was nineteen. I had no interest in mating the alpha who impregnated me, nor did I want an abortion. I had every intention of raising Jack on my own, and I tried. I… I really tried." His throat tightened and he had to pause as the old familiar guilt rose up to pull him under. Maybe he hadn't tried hard enough. Maybe he shouldn't have been so quick to accept Michael's offer.
He felt Dean's arm tighten around him, and the alpha's lips brushed his temple, but surprisingly, it was Eileen's kind, gentle voice that brought Castiel back to the present. "It's okay, Cas," she said. "There's no judgment here. We just need to understand what you're dealing with so we can help."
Castiel nodded and took a deep, calming breath. It filled his nose with the scent of maple trees on a warm summer day, the scent of Dean, and he immediately felt more grounded.
"By the time Jack was four months old, it became clear that I was going to flunk out of college. I couldn't keep up with my classes while caring for a newborn and working to keep a roof over our heads. And with no degree, I was going to be very limited in the jobs I could find. I wanted to give my son a good life. I wanted to buy us a house someday with a yard for him to play in. That's when my brother offered me a solution. He and his mate would care for Jack until I was more financially stable. He said it would be simpler for everyone if he had legal custody in the meantime, but he promised it was only temporary. As soon as I was ready, Jack would be mine again."
"Quick question," Sam said, his hands still moving, translating his own words now. "Did you ever put this agreement in writing?"
"No." Castiel grimaced. "I know it was stupid—"
"It's not the end of the world," Sam hurried to reassure him. "There's plenty of legal precedent for honoring handshake deals. Plus, you're the biological parent. The court is automatically leaning in your favor as long as Michael can't produce any evidence that you're unfit."
Castiel and Dean exchanged a look.
"What?" Sam asked, glancing back and forth between them. "Is there something he can use against you?"
Castiel waited for Dean's nod of permission before speaking. "Last night we stayed over at Michael's because of the snow, and Hannah walked in on us in a, uh… compromising position."
"Ah."
Castiel watched the struggle play out on Sam's face with sympathy.
"Okay, as Dean's brother I really don't want to know, but as your lawyer, I have to ask. How compromising exactly?"
"Dean and I have a somewhat untraditional sexual relationshi—"
"Cas tops," Dean blurted out, clearly desperate to get this part of the conversation over with as quickly as possible. "Hannah saw Cas fucking me, okay?"
Sam blinked. "Is that all? I was expecting something a lot kinkier from the buildup."
"Seriously? That's not kinky enough for you?" Dean said incredulously.
Sam actually rolled his eyes, something Castiel was sure he didn't usually do around clients. "Dean, it's the twenty-first century. Despite what people like Dad think, there are plenty of alphas who have untraditional preferences in the bedroom, and the Supreme Court ruled all remaining anti-sodomy laws unconstitutional in 2003. If that's all Michael's got, then he's got nothing. The judge will laugh him out of the courtroom."
"So," Castiel took a deep breath, feeling the giddy tingle of hope once again, "you think we can win?"
Sam looked over at Eileen and both of them smiled. "We've won much tougher cases than this," Eileen said.
Castiel felt a laugh bubbling up inside him, and he didn't even try to contain it. Dean hugged him, embarrassment forgotten as the alpha caught the scent of Castiel's joy and relief.
"However," Sam said, deflating their euphoria, "I have to warn you, this could take some time to actually go to court. There's a process. First we get our case together. Then we notify Michael and his lawyers that you're suing him for custody, and we have to give them some time to prepare their case. There will be a home visit from a social worker to verify that your place is safe for a kid and your relationship is healthy and stable. Then there will be supervised visits with Jack to see how he interacts with the two of you. Michael and Hannah will have to do all these things as well, and there will be psych evals for all four of you and for Jack."
"How long are we talking?" Castiel asked.
"Minimum? Six months. If Michael's lawyers try stalling tactics though… it could take a couple years."
And the emotional roller coaster rushed down a steep slope again. "Years?" Castiel said hollowly. Jack might be eight before they were allowed to be a family again?
"That's the worst case scenario," Eileen said, reaching out to lightly touch Castiel's hand. "It probably won't take that long, but we won't lie to you about this. We need you to be prepared for all possibilities."
Castiel nodded numbly. He supposed two years was better than never getting to see his son again.
~o0o~
Cas was very quiet on the drive home, and Dean didn't try to make him talk. He did hold the omega's hand though, and Cas squeezed back in gratitude even as he stared blankly out the window at the passing buildings.
Once they were back in the safety and comfort of their cozy little townhouse, Dean made Cas sit down at the kitchen table and plunked a cup of tea in front of him before making some sandwiches for lunch. Cas' pliant silence, meekly letting Dean take care of everything, reminded him of the night they'd hatched their insane plan. Was that really barely a week ago? It felt like several years. In light of the things he had learned today, Dean looked back on the things Cas had said that night with a new understanding.
It's just not how I imagined it.
Cas didn't mean that he'd imagined receiving a claiming bite from some faceless alpha he had yet to meet. He meant that he'd imagined Dean biting him, but for real instead of just for show. God, that was… well, hot. Had he spent the nights when they slept in separate rooms jerking off to the thought of Dean's teeth in his neck? Had he fantasized about it while Dean was doing the same just down the hall?
Dean quickly pushed those thoughts aside before his arousal could become obvious in his scent. There would be plenty of time for that later. Right now Cas needed something else from him.
Cas looked up when Dean put a plate with a turkey sandwich in front of him. He blinked, coming back from wherever he had gone in his head, and said softly, "Thank you, Dean."
"Any time," Dean said. On an impulse, he kissed Cas on the cheek before sitting down with his own plate.
Cas smiled. It was small, but it was a real smile, and it was all for Dean. Dean was going to spend the rest of his life making sure his omega smiled as often as possible.
Cas didn't pick up his sandwich right away, and when he had stared at it for almost two minutes, Dean swallowed and said, "If you're not hungry, I can put it in the fridge for later. Or I could make you something else. You want an omelet?"
Cas shook his head. "The sandwich is fine, Dean. I just…" He dropped his head into his hands. For a moment the stagnant smell of fear and sadness encroached on the edges of his scent. "Two years is a long time. I've already missed so much of my son's life. And what if Michael won't let me see Jack at all once he finds out I'm challenging his custody? I—"
"Hey. Come here." Sensing the omega's rising panic, Dean stood up, pulled Cas out of the chair and into his arms.
Cas immediately tucked his nose into Dean's scent gland without prompting, winding his arms tightly around the alpha's waist. "I'm not having second thoughts," he said, the words slightly muffled in Dean's neck. "I have to get him out of there, whatever it takes. I'm just… I'm so scared, Dean."
"I know," Dean said, rubbing his back. "I know, but you can do this. We can do this. I'm gonna be there for you every step of the way, okay? You're not alone."
Cas nodded and held on a little tighter.
After a few more moments, Cas' scent calmed, and they untangled themselves and sat back down. This time Cas dug into his food, moaning a little as the first bite reminded him that he hadn't eaten all day. Hannah had not offered them breakfast before they left.
"Maybe there's some legal way to protect your visitation rights while we wait for the case to go to trial," Dean said between bites. "We should ask Sam about that."
Cas nodded, his mouth too full to answer with words.
"There's, uh… there's something else I was gonna bring up at the meeting, but then I thought I should talk to you about it privately first."
Cas tilted his head to show that Dean had his full attention.
"Something Michael said to me got me thinking. He, um… well, he made some crack about me not being alpha enough to knock you up with babies of my own, and that was the only reason we wanted Jack. Cas, do you think this whole thing could be because Hannah can't get pregnant and Jack is their only chance to have a child?"
Cas blinked. "That… would make a lot of sense, but it doesn't change anything. If it's true, then I feel for them, but I'm not obligated to give them my child."
"No, of course not. That's not what I meant. I just thought if we could prove they had an ulterior motive for wanting to keep Jack, that it has nothing to do with what's in his best interest and everything to do with what's in theirs…"
Dean watched Cas give it serious consideration. He could almost hear the wheels turning in that sexy brain of his. But finally Cas shook his head. "No. We can discuss it with Sam. We can keep it in our back pocket just in case, but I have no wish to publicly humiliate them like that if it can be avoided. I won't fight dirty unless I have absolutely no other choice."
Part of Dean had known all along that Cas would say that, but he still marveled at his omega's compassion. My Omega, purred his inner alpha. All mine. He leaned across the table to give Cas a lingering kiss.
"What was that for?" Cas asked with a bemused smile when they parted.
"For being you," Dean said with a dopey smile of his own. "Don't ever change."
When they finished eating, Cas insisted on doing the dishes. When Dean protested that he'd had a hard day and should rest, Cas shut him up with a thorough kiss, then murmured in his ear, "How about while I'm cleaning up here, you start moving your stuff into my room? You may reorganize my drawers as much as you need to make space."
"Oh, I'll reorganize your drawers alright," Dean said, and he squeezed Cas' ass just in case his meaning wasn't clear.
Cas just rolled his eyes and pushed Dean out of the kitchen.
Dean was only halfway through clearing out his closet when Cas joined him upstairs. Wordlessly, Cas began to help, and between them they managed to get Dean completely moved in in less than an hour. Cas finished the job by ceremoniously placing the framed photo of Dean and his mother that had always resided on Dean's bedside table right beside the pictures of Jack.
"There," he said, turning and putting his arms around Dean's neck. "Now this is officially our room."
Dean kissed him, deep and slow. When they came up for air, he said, "We should turn the extra room into a playroom for Jack."
"Mmm. That's a thought," Cas said, "or…"
"Or what?"
Cas' smile turned shy. "Or we could turn it into a nursery."
Dean's heart skipped a beat. "R-really? You want," Dean's breath hitched, "you want to…"
Cas nodded as though this should be the most obvious thing in the world instead of something Dean had given up on ever having. "I mean, not this year, considering how much we have on our plate, but… when the time feels right to both of us, I would love to have a baby with you."
Dean kissed him again, harder this time to distract himself from the lump in his throat. Cas kissed him back just as hard, and before they knew it, they were frantically pushing clothes out of the way to get at skin.
"We… we should talk about things," Dean said even as he mouthed at the claiming bite on Cas' neck.
"Talk later," Cas growled, fumbling blindly with Dean's belt. "Sex now."
Dean wasn't about to argue with that. He walked them back towards the bed (their bed where they would sleep together every night for the rest of their lives, and maybe where they would make a baby together one day) until Cas' knees hit the edge of the mattress. Cas let Dean take control. For now.
Once the omega was sitting down, Dean knelt in front of him and helped him out of his shoes and socks. Cas looked down at him with such reverence, like Dean was the prize here and Cas the lucky winner when it was obviously the other way around.
"I never did get to suck you off last night," Dean said, reaching for Cas' fly. "May I?"
"By all means," Cas said, voice hoarse and eyes dark with want.
Dean opened Cas' pants, and Cas lifted his ass off the bed so Dean could pull them off along with his underwear. Cas' cock stood out proudly between his strong thighs, flushed with blood and already dripping pre-come. He might be an omega, but he was very definitely a male omega, and Dean loved that about him.
And then Cas said, "Color?"
A jolt of lust went through Dean, his own erection twitching desperately against the confines of his jeans. "Green. Very, very green. Bright fucking neon green."
Cas chuckled. "That's my good Alpha. Put your hands on my thighs, and leave them there. Do not touch me anywhere else, and do not touch yourself. If you follow these instructions, I will help you come after I finish. If you disobey, you will not get to come. If you need to safeword while your mouth is full, double tap on my thigh, and we will stop immediately. Repeat these rules back to me so I know you understand."
"Hands on your thighs. No moving them. No touching myself. Double tap for safeword," Dean recited dutifully, as he tapped the floor beside his left leg. "May I use either hand for that, Omega?"
"Yes, you may," Cas said with a pleased smile. "Thank you for requesting clarification. That was good."
Dean preened at the praise. He placed his hands very deliberately on Cas' thighs. It was a form of binding really, but more indulgent than ropes, allowing him to touch Cas even as it restricted him from alleviating the increasingly uncomfortable situation in his pants.
Cas removed Dean's glasses and placed them on the nightstand. Then he threaded his fingers through Dean's hair and guided the alpha's head down. Dean let his jaw go slack and relaxed his throat as best he could. The moment Cas' cock slipped past his lips, Dean forgot all discomfort. He forgot the meaning of the word 'discomfort'. His mouth flooded with the salty, musky, sour taste of Cas. His nose filled with the scent of thunderstorms as Cas pushed him almost all the way down to the root, pubic hair tickling his face. Dean closed his eyes and surrendered control to his Dom, floating contentedly in his own personal Heaven. Nothing existed but Cas. The only sounds Dean was aware of were Cas' ragged breaths, the occasional gravelly command to swallow which he obeyed readily, and an almost unbroken stream of praise and endearments. "Just like that. So good for me, my Alpha. My perfect Alpha. Oh god, I love you."
Dean felt when Cas was about to come, his cock swelling just a little bit more, stretching Dean's lips to the limit, and he swallowed without being told, riding so high he felt like he might never come down.
When Cas guided him off of his oversensitive cock, Dean almost protested, but then he remembered that he was Cas' good Alpha, and continuing to suck on Cas when Cas didn't want him to wouldn't be good. He gazed hazily up at Cas, and to his amazement the omega was glowing. There was a literal halo of light around his head. Part of Dean's brain was aware that it was just the lamp behind Cas and his own fuzzy vision, but that part wasn't currently in control of Dean's mouth.
"You're an angel," he said. It felt strange to wrap his tongue around empty air instead of the solid warmth of Cas' cock.
"No. Only named after one," Cas said, cupping Dean's jaw and looking down at him with an amused and endearingly fond smile.
"No, you are," Dean insisted doggedly. "You're my beautiful angel. You're so beautiful, my Omega."
"Thank you, my Alpha. Can you stand up?"
Dean attempted it and almost tipped over on top of Cas. Cas caught him and guided him gently onto the bed where he removed the rest of Dean's clothes.
"I'm hard," Dean observed with some surprise as Cas took off his pants. He had completely forgotten about it while he was on his knees having his mouth fucked, but now that he'd noticed, the aching need to be touched made itself felt again with a vengeance. But Cas had ordered him not to touch himself, and he wanted to be Cas' good Alpha. That was the most important thing in the world, so he fisted his hands in the sheets to make sure he stayed Cas' good Alpha.
"Mmmm. So you are," Cas said, his voice and scent rich with arousal even though his cock was still soft after his orgasm. "Would you like some help with that?"
"Please," Dean said, trying his best not to whine. "Please touch me, Omega."
Cas climbed into the bed with Dean and spread himself out on top of the alpha. Just that little bit of friction against Cas' stomach was almost enough to make Dean come. He moaned and spread his legs for Cas to settle more comfortably between them. Yes, that felt right. He wanted Cas to fuck him from the other end too, but he was still just lucid enough to know that he wouldn't last through the required prep.
"I've got you," Cas murmured against Dean's lips. "My good Alpha." When Cas took him in hand and began to stroke him, Dean felt tears leak from the corners of his eyes, but his Omega kissed them away, murmuring encouragement. "Let go, Alpha. I've got you. You've taken such good care of me today. Now let me take care of you. Let go."
His orgasm broke over him in gentle waves. It seemed to go on and on for an eternity, and the final wave pulled him down into sleep.
~o0o~
Castiel left briefly to get water for both of them, but other than that he spent the next hour shamelessly watching his alpha sleep. Dean was always beautiful, but he was especially beautiful when he was free of all the worries he usually carried, when he surrendered himself body and soul into Castiel's care, trusting Castiel to keep him safe. Castiel smiled as he traced the slack lines of his lover's peaceful face and thought with no small amount of awe, He's mine. He wondered when it would stop feeling like a dream.
When Dean's eyes finally blinked groggily open, the first thing he saw was Castiel staring at him. "Caaas. You're doing it again," he groaned, burrowing into the pillow to escape Castiel's gaze.
"Don't pretend you don't love it," Castiel chuckled, kissing his cheek. "I'm onto you. Now sit up and drink your water."
Dean grumbled but he obeyed.
Castiel watched him closely. "That scene was more intense than I anticipated. How are you feeling?"
Dean considered for a moment, and Castiel waited, letting Dean take stock of his body without distractions. Finally Dean said, "Hungry, thirsty, and still kind of tired, but other than that, I feel great."
"Okay, good. Let me know immediately if that changes. I'll order food. Pizza or Thai?"
"Thai."
Castiel grabbed his phone off the nightstand to place the order.
"We still need to talk about shit," Dean said reluctantly.
"Not until after you've eaten," Castiel replied firmly. When Dean tensed a little beside him (almost imperceptible except to someone who was as attuned to Dean as Castiel was), Castiel paused in pulling up the restaurant's website and turned his full attention to his sub again. "I'm not avoiding it, Dean. I promise we'll talk about everything soon, but first I need to make sure you're not in imminent danger of dropping. And I'm hungry too."
Dean accepted that with a small smile and continued sipping at his water.
Once the food was ordered, they put on pajamas and moved down to the living room so they would hear the door when it arrived. Castiel put on one of Dean's favorite makeover shows (not that Dean would ever admit to liking it, but Castiel knew him far too well), and they cuddled up like always, fitting themselves into each other's personal space with barely a thought. After the emotional roller coaster of the past few days, this was reassuring in its simple familiarity.
The young alpha who delivered their food took a half step back as soon as Castiel opened the door, her eyes widening in alarm. It took Castiel a moment to realize that the loose neck of his t-shirt put the bite on full display, not to mention he hadn't showered yet so he was coated in the scent of Dean's arousal. In short, he both looked and smelled thoroughly claimed, and the poor girl had no way of knowing how territorial his alpha might be, so she was instinctively wary of touching him, standing too close to him, or making any move that could in any way be construed as a challenge to his almost-mate. Castiel took pity on her and let her put the bag of food down on the floor just inside the door, holding out the money by the edges so she could take it with no skin contact. "Thank you," he said.
She nodded and practically fled back to her car.
Castiel closed the door and turned to find Dean sprawled across the entire couch, languid and golden as a drowsy lion. He had clearly watched the entire exchange, but where Castiel had expected to see smug pride, there was something else. Something much softer. "What?" Castiel asked, moving the food to the coffee table. "What's that look for?"
Dean shrugged one shoulder, the movement making him look even more like a big cat. "I just love you."
Those words on Dean's beautiful lips would probably never fail to bring a smile to Castiel's face, not even if he heard them a million times. "I love you, too," he said, and watched an answering smile bloom on Dean's face, matched by the joy suffusing the alpha's scent.
Before they could get so lost in each other that they let their dinner get cold, Castiel looked pointedly at Dean's feet in his spot on the couch. Dean looked like he was tempted to be a brat about it on principle, but Castiel raised a warning eyebrow, and the alpha quickly made room for him.
They ate out of the containers, stealing bites from each other, another comforting familiarity. When they were both full, Castiel turned off the TV. "How do you feel now?" he asked Dean. "Still tired?"
"No. Think I got my second wind. So where do you want to start?"
Castiel stood up, went over to the small desk where Dean worked on his lesson plans, and retrieved a yellow legal pad and a pen.
"Seriously, Cas?" Dean said as Castiel rejoined him on the couch. "We're not negotiating a new contract."
"Aren't we? We're shifting our boundaries which may very well affect our scenes. It will be helpful to have a record of our conversation. Besides, there are multiple topics we need to discuss, and I want to be sure we don't overlook anything. Lists help me think."
Dean rolled his eyes and muttered, "Nerd," affectionately.
Castiel ignored him and began writing.
1. Monogamy
He heard Dean inhale, about to speak. "We will discuss each of these things in detail in a minute, Dean," he preempted. "First let me get my thoughts in order please."
Dean kept silent.
2. Sex
"Okay, seriously?" Dean burst out. "Does our sex life really need to be a… a talking point on a list?"
Castiel calmly added a subsection to that one labeled, heats/ruts. Dean deflated with a sheepish, "Oh." Castiel added two more subsections — D/s, and non D/s — and turned to look innocently at Dean.
"Is there anything you would like to add to that?"
"Nope," Dean said meekly. "Looks like you've got it covered." He laid a soft kiss behind Castiel's ear and murmured against the skin, "Is it weird that I think it's hot when you're all efficient and organized and shit?"
Castiel smirked. "No. Nor is it surprising given how much you like it when I take charge. Now are you going to continue distracting me, or are you going to let me finish this so we can, as you put it, 'talk about shit'?"
"Yeah, yeah," Dean laughed. "I'll behave. Tell you what. I'll put away the leftovers while you're makin' your little outline." He pecked Castiel on the cheek and got up to clear away the uneaten food.
"Yes, that would be very helpful. Thank you," Castiel said absently, his mind already miles ahead, running through potential issues and sources of conflict in their new relationship. He tried to look at the entirety of their future together the same way he would plan a scene, accounting for as many variables as possible, and putting safety measures in place for the things he couldn't foresee.
When he was done, the list covered everything from mating and marriage, to joint bank accounts and buying a larger house someday, to whether Dean would legally adopt Jack and how many more children they wanted.
Castiel tapped his pen against the paper. "Is there anything you would like to add?" he asked again. He wasn't sure when Dean had come back into the room, but there the alpha was, a warm, solid, maple-scented presence at his side.
Dean gently took the pad from Castiel's hands and read down the list. "You forgot to put where we'll be buried and who'll speak at our funerals," he said dryly, but Castiel had seen his finger pause at the line that said 'legal adoption', some intense but not unpleasant emotion clogging his scent for a moment. He was well acquainted with Dean's tendency to use sarcastic humor to distract from vulnerability, and since he wasn't Domming Dean right now, he let it go.
"We don't have to discuss things in this order. That was just a stream of consciousness. And we don't have to cover all of it tonight. That's the advantage of the list. We can take breaks and come back to it without worrying about forgetting what we were going to discuss."
"Okay, okay," Dean chuckled. "I stand corrected. The list was a great idea."
"So shall we start at the beginning?"
Castiel leaned over to tap the word 'monogamy', but Dean took his hand and said, "Actually, no. I think we should start with the most important thing." He guided Castiel's finger down the list until he settled on the section labeled, 'Jack'.
Castiel's heart seemed to grow a size as it filled with love and gratitude. Dean not only understood how important his son was to him, but he was willing to postpone discussion of other aspects of their relationship — aspects that most alphas would deem far more important — to set Castiel's mind at ease about this. "Alright," he said with a soft smile. "Let's start there. How involved do you want to be in his upbringing? Assuming I get custody."
"You will. And I guess that depends on how involved you want me to be. He doesn't suddenly become my kid just because we're together for real."
"Oh." Castiel did his best to keep the sinking disappointment out of his scent, but he clearly failed dismally because Dean immediately reached out to gather him up, the list falling forgotten between the sofa cushions.
"No, no, no, sweetheart. I didn't mean it like that. It's not that I don't want to be his dad. I just don't want to overstep. I will not be another Michael. He's your baby, so it's your decision."
Castiel hid his smile in Dean's shirt. "You're the best man I've ever known," he murmured.
Dean snorted. "I think that says more about the other men in your life than it does about me."
His face still hidden in Dean's shoulder, Castiel rolled his eyes. "Regardless, I would be honored if you would raise Jack with me as my partner, raise him as our son. Obviously, whether or not he calls you Dad too will be up to him, but," he raised his head, "as far as I'm concerned, you would be his father just as much as I am. If you want to be."
Dean looked at him with sparkling eyes, an incredibly happy scent filling the space. "God, you… you have no idea how happy that would make me, Cas." A tear trickled down his cheek, and he swiped it away self-consciously. "And I promise that when we have more kids, I won't treat him any different. They'll all be ours, Jack and whoever comes next, and I'll love them all the same."
"I know you will." Castiel cupped his cheek and thumbed another tear away. "I know that, Dean. That's why I'm comfortable letting you have full parental rights to Jack. Can we talk to Sam about making it legal? Not to be morbid, but if something happened to me, I don't want Michael getting back custody or, heaven forbid, foster care. I know he will always be safe with you."
Dean nodded. "Yeah, of course. I mean, obviously we can't do it until your custody is settled, but we'll ask Sam what we need to do to get our ducks in a row, and as soon as possible, we'll make it official. And we'll get Sam to draw up a will naming him and Charlie or someone else as backup guardians in case something happens to both of us. I promise you, Cas, once we get him out of there, he's never going back."
Castiel breathed a sigh of relief, feeling a weight he hadn't even realized he was carrying suddenly lifted. He kissed Dean quickly and whispered, "Thank you."
"What about… what about scening? Are we still gonna do that?"
Castiel blinked, confused by the abrupt change of subject. "Don't you want to?"
"Yeah, of course I do, but it's like you said last night. Getting interrupted at the wrong moment can be dangerous, and kids… well, they're basically walking, talking interruptions. What if he has a bad dream? What if he suddenly starts puking? You should never be put in a position where you have to choose between taking care of your sub or taking care of your child."
God, just when I think I can't possibly fall any deeper in love with this man. "Honey, this is what babysitters are for. We'll have to schedule ahead, so our scenes will be even less spontaneous than usual, and we'll probably have to cut back to once or twice a month until he's older, but I don't see any reason why we should have to give it up entirely."
Dean smiled. "Guess we'll have to make each one count."
"Don't we always?"
"Good point."
Dean rested his forehead against Castiel's and they sat quietly for a few moments. Both of their scents were happy and content. Castiel wanted to just curl up in Dean's arms, put on a movie, and make out until their lips were sore, but they still had things to discuss.
Dean broke the silence first. "We can go back to the top of the list now if you want."
It took Castiel a moment to remember what the first thing on the list had been. "Oh. Yes. Monogamy." He sat up and retrieved the pad from between the sofa cushions. "Is that something you want? Something you need? Please be completely honest. No more telling me what you think I want to hear."
Dean rubbed a hand over his face, knocking his glasses askew and then righting them. "Well, to be honest, Cas, I haven't been with anyone else in almost four years."
That caught Castiel by surprise. "Really? But… what about all the times you spent the night at Benny's?"
Dean shrugged. "He's a good friend. He's easy to talk to and… very calming to be around. And yeah, maybe there used to be something more there. Was a time when I could even see myself settling down with him, get married, adopt some kids who needed a good home. But then…"
"But then you fell in love with me," Castiel finished for him. Neither of them could keep from smiling as the words were said out loud.
Dean ducked his head, grinning and blushing, and god, he was so adorable. Castiel just wanted to cover his pink face with kisses. But he didn't want them to get distracted when they were finally making progress and actually communicating.
"Yeah. Now I'm not saying I didn't know what it looked like when I spent the night at his place and came home smelling like him," Dean continued, his smile fading into embarrassment, and his happy scent suddenly taking on a burnt undertone. "I... might have deliberately led you to certain assumptions to… throw you off the scent."
Castiel reached out to squeeze his hand. "It's okay," he said softly. "This isn't about placing blame. We both failed to communicate, but that's in the past now. This is about laying a fresh foundation, a solid one this time, without secrets, omissions, or lies."
Dean nodded, but he still smelled guilty and ashamed, and he wouldn't meet Castiel's eyes, so Castiel let go of his hand and tipped his chin up, catching and keeping the alpha's eyes with his.
"You didn't hurt me, Dean. I promise you this. It never made me jealous when I thought you were sleeping with Benny. You came home calm and happy, and that was all that mattered to me."
Dean looked up, warily hopeful. "Really?"
"Really. Personally, I am neither firmly monogamous nor polyamorous by nature. As long as my partner or partners are happy and satisfied, so am I. So tell me what would make you happy."
"You," Dean said without hesitation.
Castiel chuckled. "I'm getting that, but in what capacity? Exclusive partner or…"
This time Dean did hesitate. "I'm… not sure? I want to say it won't bother me if you sleep with other people. It's never bothered me before, and the threesome scenes with other alphas fucking you were really hot. But if we were mated," he trailed off, but Castiel understood what he was getting at.
"You're worried that once your alpha instincts see me as your omega, you'll feel differently about other people touching me."
Dean nodded. "And I don't want to be that alpha, Cas. I don't want to be the kind of mate who tells you who you can hang out with and what you can do with your own body! But… but I've read about how the mating bond hormones can make alphas really possessive, especially in the beginning. An, an, and I—"
His eyes were wide and his scent was turning burnt again, and Castiel knew that he had to reel the alpha in before he talked himself into a full blown anxiety attack. He put a hand over Dean's mouth, cutting off the stream of babbling. "Stop. Take a breath," he commanded, holding Dean's gaze.
Dean inhaled through his nose.
Castiel took his hand away from Dean's mouth and stroked it down his sternum. "And let it out."
Dean blew the air out between his lips, and Castiel steadfastly ignored the giddy rush he got from the alpha obeying him so readily.
He guided Dean through deep breaths, calmly stroking his hand up and down the alpha's chest, until his scent calmed and his jaw relaxed. "Okay, first of all," he said when Dean was ready to listen, "there is a big difference between requesting an exclusive sexual relationship and treating me like property. I don't think you would ever do the latter, but if you did, believe me, I would call you on that bullshit right away."
Dean's lips twitched with a suppressed smile.
"And as to the former, if you're not sure what you're going to be comfortable with, we can play it by ear. How about this? From here on out, we don't sleep with other people without discussing it with each other first. If we are not both one-hundred percent comfortable, then nothing happens. No dating, no kissing, no sex without each other's enthusiastic permission. And agreeing to it once does not mean agreeing to it every time. We'll decide on a case by case basis, and we will decide together. Does that sound okay to you?"
Dean had nodded along with Castiel's explanation, his posture growing more at ease with every word, so it was no surprise when he said eagerly, "Yeah. Yes. That sounds good."
"Good." Castiel jotted down a note next to 'monogamy' summarizing the agreement they had come to. "And I think the same arrangement can be applied to threesomes. Obviously we would only do that if we're both in the mood, so if the mating bond makes it unpleasant for you to watch another alpha fuck me, then we'll take a break from those kinds of scenes and we'll play just the two of us until your hormones have settled down. And if you never want to do that again, I'm okay with that."
Dean made a frustrated huffing sound. "I'm not sure I am. I like those scenes."
Castiel tilted his head. "Is this an actual concern or are you being dramatic? Because if you're really worried about the mating bond negatively impacting our sex life, that is definitely something we should discuss."
Dean sighed again. "Maybe? I don't know. I'm probably overthinking it. I can live without the threesomes as long as I still get to sub for you. It would be like never being able to eat cake again but I could have all the pie I wanted. I just…" He rolled his neck against the back of the couch and stared up at the ceiling. "I just don't want to bite you and suddenly turn into some knothead stereotype and then you'll regret getting stuck with me."
Castiel resisted the urge to laugh because not only would Dean certainly take it the wrong way, but he was obviously concerned about the issue and Castiel would never belittle his emotions. Instead, he tossed the list and pen onto the coffee table, climbed into Dean's lap, and kissed him. Dean gave a grunt of surprise but quickly responded in kind, gripping Castiel's hips to pull him closer.
Castiel lost himself for a few minutes in the taste of Dean's mouth (Thai food and a faint lingering hint of spunk) and the familiar hearth fire scent of the alpha's arousal. But when he felt Dean start to plump up inside his thin sleep pants, he slowed things down, switching from deep, wet, hungry kisses, to a soft, nipping, catch-and-release of Dean's lips. Finally he rested his forehead against Dean's and just breathed with him for a moment.
"Mmmm. What was that for?" Dean whispered into the scant space between their mouths.
"You are not a good alpha despite your instincts, Dean," Castiel said equally softly. "You are a good alpha because of them. The mating bond cannot and will not fundamentally alter who you are, and I could never regret being mated to the man you are. But if you are at all afraid or uncertain, we don't have to do that. There are plenty of couples who never mate just like there are plenty of couples who never legally marry."
Dean's hand had crept under Castiel's t-shirt while they were making out, and now it rested on the small of his back, a comforting touch rather than a sexual one. He swept his thumb back and forth across the line of Castiel's spine like a metronome. "I am scared, but not because I'm not sure if I want to mate you, Cas. It's just… I just found out today that you want to mate me. I'm still wrapping my head around that. Maybe… maybe we should table the whole mating bite thing for now and get used to all the other new stuff. We'll keep renewing the claim so we don't get sick, and in the meantime, we could… go on some actual dates?"
Castiel smiled. "You want to court me?"
Dean shrugged, his ears tinting red. "Yeah. Call me old-fashioned." His tone was casual enough, but Castiel knew him too well to be fooled. This was something Dean had been dreaming about for a long time.
"Well, I certainly won't say no to that." He kissed Dean again. It was meant to be a quick peck, but once he started, it was difficult to stop.
"Hmmm. Thought we weren't supposed to get distracted," Dean said even as he kissed back.
"I think we've made good progress," Castiel murmured. "We've earned a break. How about we," he sucked Dean's lower lip into his mouth and nibbled on it for a second, drawing a whining groan from the alpha and a wave of sweet, smoky scent, "take a shower?"
Dean hummed in contented agreement.
In the shower, Castiel let Dean renew the claiming bite. This time, as his alpha sucked a deep, lasting bruise onto his scent gland, he clung to Dean without reservation, making no attempt to hide how much he was enjoying it. He let his scent fill the steamy bathroom with thunderstorms, and he moaned, "Alpha," into Dean's ear. Dean growled happily into Castiel's neck, and the vibrations instantly had his cock fully hard and his ass leaking slick onto the tile wall behind him.
Dean was rutting mindlessly against Castiel's hip as well, so Castiel took them both in hand, stroking them together with quick, deft movements until their orgasms hit them almost simultaneously.
As white hot pleasure gradually receded into a warm, golden afterglow, Dean began gently licking the renewed claiming bite and lavishing it with kisses. Castiel melted, his whole being suffused with safety and happiness. This time there was no need to pretend. This time his dreams really had come true.