annafanhide bio
 Author has written 54 stories for Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, and Sleepy Hollow. Hello and welcome. Decided my old profile had got way too long, so it was time for a drastic prune. My stories A mix of parody and straight up adventure/romance, with occasional forays into slightly odder stuff. A lot of it of course featuring the characters I wanted to be as a child/teenager (Eowyn, Leia) and the characters I fell in love with as a teenager (Faramir, Han). Lord of the Rings Relatively straight-up, close to canon Flower of Ice and Steel, The Red Tower of Ecthelion, The Little Wooden Horse. Humour, but canon-based Whenas in Silks, Even Educated Fleas, Redware, Night on the Plains More AU A Tight Space, Howzat, The Princeling, There, The Pale Rider. Parody Adventures outside Middle Earth, Groundhog GDIME, Surrender to the Steward (actually, that's a weird one - simultaneously canon and parody), Because Second Best is Pretty Good, Adventures of a Tenth Roadie, Christmas Lecture Way out in left field The Bequest, Who Will Guard the Guardians, A Single Barrel (I leave this as a how-not-to lesson: my first attempt at M rated stuff). And now appearing as The Silk Road: Part 1 - Howzat, Part 2 - Dear Diary, Part 3 - Hazard Heart, Part 4 - Whenas in Silks. This particular universe will be expanded and added to as the mood takes me - Hazard Heart is still a work-in-progress.Star Wars Beginnings, Change a line - ruin a movie franchise, Her Beautiful Back, Tell me about the first time, Just another day on Hoth. And I have fallen completely in love with Cassian and Jyn as a pairing in Rogue One, so we now have The Thread and the Vibroblade (serious, canon compliant) and Blueprint 75159 (parody fix-it). Sleepy Hollow Real men take responsibility My favourites No particular genre - I'm a firm believer that what matters is the quality of the writing - so canon gap filler/extension versus modern day AU, straight or slash, serious world building that tries to be true to Tolkiens world versus GDIME - they're all in there. (The only thing that's beyond the pale in my books is stories which set out to eroticise rape). The stories in this list are in there for lots of reasons - great writing, exciting plots, moving romance, engaging characters, laugh-out-loud humour, pick-me-up-on-a-bad day fluff. Chances are if you've enjoyed my stories (which I guess is why you're here) you'll probably like some of the stories on my list of favourites too. Thank you to all the people who help with my writing - Lady Peter (who's beta-ed some of the longer pieces), Sian22, Tommy Ginger (who helped supply so many of the crazy ideas which make people laugh), Borys (for letting me play in his sandbox and great discussions about weapons and military tactics), the Ladies of the Garden of Ithilien (encouragement and critique) and all the many, many people who've sent helpful PMs. And a very big thank you to the reviewers without accounts - I can't PM you to thank you in person (as I do people who do have accounts), so I'd just like to take the opportunity to thank you here - all reviews are so very much appreciated, and so very encouraging. |
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Charmed Life by Altariel reviews
After the death of Boromir, Faramir returns to Henneth Annun.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,186 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/6/2020 - Faramir - Complete
Darkness in the Forest by SerenLyall reviews
Eryn Galen-Greenwood the Great-has begun to fall into darkness. Evil creatures stalk the shadows hunting, thirsting. When calamity befalls a group of travelers from Rivendell accompanied by an escort led by Legolas, two of the company find themselves in a situation that quickly turns from bad to worse. Now they only have each other to rely on as they battle to simply stay alive
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Angst - Chapters: 49 - Words: 113,799 - Reviews: 636 - Favs: 127 - Follows: 199 - Updated: 9/30/2019 - Published: 10/28/2012 - Legolas, Elrond, Elrohir, Thranduil
Echoes by sian22 reviews
One diary. Three different Mettare Eves. Three generations of the Steward's family. Sometimes a secret wishes to be shared. Annafan's Christmas present and my submission for the Teitho Challenge 'Curiosity'
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,818 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Published: 1/16/2019 - Aragorn, Boromir, Faramir, Finduilas - Complete
Captains and pawns by sian22 reviews
"The board is set and the pieces are moving." So Gandalf said, but what unseen hand made them move? The Lords of Gondor and Rohan find Saruman will use them for his own end; the Steward's sons and Rohan's Prince and Lady must find their way. A tale from Faramir's birth until the fateful kiss. Avatar by the wonderful mythlorn-art
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 41 - Words: 294,893 - Reviews: 371 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 7/23/2018 - Published: 4/21/2014 - Boromir, Eowyn, Faramir, Theodred - Complete
Love is for Sisters by rlsa reviews
The third (and final) look at the Black women and their dealings with love. Narcissa invites Andromeda to tea three months after the Battle of Hogwarts.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,296 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/8/2018 - Narcissa M., Andromeda T. - Complete
Diary of a Wimpy Sith by PinkFluffyUnicorn123 reviews
So, we (my son and I) watched TFA last night in preparation for going to see TLJ today, and we still think Kylo Ren is scary until he takes his mask off, at which point he looks like a bit of a wimp. So here it is, the story of Kylo Ren's school days. (Parody!) Possible spoilers for TLJ from chapter 2 on.
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 969 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/16/2017
Hotspur & Steelsheen by Medea Smyke reviews
Following the aftermath of the Battle of Five Armies, a trip to Lossarnach takes a nasty turn for Prince Thengel. He must rely on the hospitality of the young mistress of Imloth Melui. Even under the blossoming trees of that fabled valley, life takes a turn from the idyllic. Where greedy relatives fail, can Morwen and Thengel discover strength in friendship & perhaps more?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 45 - Words: 216,607 - Reviews: 301 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 2/1/2017 - Published: 4/10/2014 - Morwen S., Thengel - Complete
Mrs Ferny by Be3 reviews
Face it, girls, there's not much you can do if you fall into Middle Earth all alone and helpless. Rated for language, themes, and a couple swearwords. Character death in the final chapter. COMPLETE.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 6 - Words: 9,197 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 7/4/2016 - Published: 6/1/2014 - OC - Complete
Into the Fire by suezahn reviews
Whether things are getting better or worse after the disaster on Hoth really depends on one's point of view. A trip-to-Bespin story and part of my Kismet series. Please R&R. Revised in 2016.
Star Wars - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 29 - Words: 86,306 - Reviews: 233 - Favs: 284 - Follows: 79 - Updated: 5/1/2016 - Published: 12/3/2008 - Leia O., Han S. - Complete
Morgengifu by Lady Bluejay reviews
Eomer just cannot understand why his wife doesn't remember their first meeting. Surely he made some impression on her. COMPLETE.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 23,951 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 136 - Follows: 124 - Updated: 4/30/2016 - Published: 11/2/2015 - Faramir, Eomer, Lothíriel, Imrahil - Complete
Of Wine and Rhymes by Adelie P reviews
Lively nights in Emyn Arnen lead to a new invention, which is immediately put to good use. Also featuring: Aragorn, Arwen, Éomer and Lothíriel. A tongue-in-cheek one-shot written for the February Teitho challenge (the theme was "First") with no connection to my other stories.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,895 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/17/2016 - Legolas, Gimli, Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
Feelings Untold by Niloriel1701 reviews
Set during the fellowship of the ring. Aragorn comes to a realization about his dearest and most beloved friend and ally, Legolas. The fellowship is nearing Rohan, and the confusion intensifies as Aragorn begins to question who he really is, and whether his past choices are truly his present self. It becomes clear that the feelings are not unrequited.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 21,710 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 3/13/2016 - Published: 3/29/2013 - Aragorn, Legolas
The Same Battles by A Sweet Catastrophe reviews
On a rare sleepless night, unplagued by nightmares, Eowyn wanders through the Houses of Healing and finds she isn't the only one who spends most nights revisiting her fears.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,598 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 3 - Published: 2/25/2016 - [Eowyn, Faramir] - Complete
Under the Influence by sian22 reviews
Caught in the grip of a powerful antidote, Gondor's young Captain finds he reveals more of his heart and fantasies than he would ever have imagined. What will he and the object of his hidden attraction do? An AU to Captains and Pawns where Faramir and Amerith actually do get together pre-WoTR. A Birthday present for Wheelrider who wondered 'what if'
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 6 - Words: 15,819 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/23/2016 - Published: 1/5/2016
Emyn Arnen Yule by sian22 reviews
As the Prince of Ithilien and his lady prepare to celebrate their first Mettarë together the past and future intertwine, like mistletoe on a branch of white hawthorn. An advent treat for Annafan. Merry Christmas my dear.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 18,667 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 1/6/2016 - Published: 12/16/2015 - Complete
Drop It by Tomas the Betrayer reviews
The imprisoned Horseman is spilling secrets. But if Ichabod Crane drops one more name to remind everyone how important he is, Abbie Mills will not be responsible for what happens next.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 22,147 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 12/19/2015 - Published: 10/2/2014 - Abigail M., Headless Horseman - Complete
Home with the Fairies by I-Mushi reviews
We've all seen the horribly butchered and cliché girl-falls-into-Middle-Earth stories. So is it possible to make a semi-realistic one? Follow Maddie on her own adventure exploring Middle Earth as the opposite of a Tenth Walker. COMPLETE
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 30 - Words: 255,903 - Reviews: 1488 - Favs: 2,508 - Follows: 1,707 - Updated: 12/16/2015 - Published: 6/4/2010 - Boromir, Faramir, Eomer, OC - Complete
Tainted Love by Immael reviews
"High chiselled cheek bones, startling blue eyes, hair like spun mithril, white-gold beneath the midday sun. But the allure hid only the underlying cruelty, of this she was certain..." In the midst of battle, Legolas is saved from almost certain death by a beautiful, mysterious Elleth. But why does she seem to hate him so? And can he melt her icy heart? Rating may change.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 42,289 - Reviews: 221 - Favs: 183 - Follows: 249 - Updated: 12/10/2015 - Published: 9/28/2014 - Legolas, OC, Thranduil
Shoqed by Ambrosia Jones reviews
I want to meet Abbie and Jenny's father. I don't want him to be a deadbeat drunk that bailed. I want him to be a warlock or a demon hunter or an angel or a centaur. I want him to be something other than a stereotypical absent Black male. Here is the Daddy Mills I imagine and so desperately hope we'll see.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,817 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 6 - Published: 8/24/2015 - Ichabod C., Abigail M., Jennifer M., OC - Complete
Béma! by lena1987 reviews
Amrothos has an educational experience, Rohirrim style. The night before annafan's amazing 'Howzat', because the Rohirrim are Aussies, didn't you know?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 585 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 6 - Published: 6/28/2015 - Eomer, Amrothos, Eothain - Complete
The Bride Price by sian22 reviews
Of all the negotiations the new King of Gondor mediated in his first year, this was surely the most perilous...Submitted for the May Teitho Challenge "Money". First place-Favourite Romance-2015 Tree and Flower awards
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,221 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 11 - Published: 6/18/2015 - Eowyn, Faramir, Eomer, Lothíriel - Complete
The Fine Print by CatLady4 reviews
I have always loved Jackson's depiction of the lighting of the beacons in Return of the King. However, I also wonder how they found men to tend the fire? Below is one theory.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,587 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Published: 6/10/2015 - OC - Complete
Hot Spring by sian22 reviews
Faramir shows Eowyn a green and lovely corner of their demesne she has never seen. Along the way they discover love and desire can conquer (most) fears. What more could a woman want for her birthday than a Ranger, his Shieldmaiden, a cliff rated 5.2 and rope? Happy Birthday Annafan. Rated M for mmmmmmm
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 14,942 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 2/2/2015 - Published: 11/15/2014 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
Justice by Dwimordene
Dwim's attempt to answer Ang's/E.W.'s challenge: is Eowyn a deserter or a heroine? Features Eomer, Eowyn, and Elfhelm. And the answer is...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,919 - Favs: 2 - Published: 12/28/2014 - Eowyn, Eomer, Elfhelm - Complete
Not Alone by bluelusa reviews
Legolas and Gimli's friendship was forged under the eaves of Lothlorien. But how did they find common ground after so many weeks of rivalry?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,918 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/6/2014 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
An Elf, A Man, and A Dwarf by Lasgalendil reviews
Wherein the reader finds out exactly what business each has in the Riddermark. Crackfic, Oneshot. Oblivious Legomance. M for obvious reasons.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,478 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/5/2014 - Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli, Eowyn - Complete
A Practical Guide for the Courtship of Elves, by Beren son of Barahir by Nerdy Nell reviews
Beren finds himself volunteered to share seasoned advice on "successfully" navigating the world of elvish-mortal relationships (if he can manage not to be interrupted).
Crossover - Lord of the Rings & Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 20,155 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 145 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 10/5/2014 - Published: 4/26/2013 - Beren, Lúthien T. - Complete
A Confession that Contains its own Proof by JWAB reviews
D'Artagnan is desperate to win Constance back, but he can't do it alone. "After all, what is a kiss? A vow made at closer range, a confession that contains its own proof…; a secret told to the mouth rather than to the ear, a fleeting moment filled with the hush of eternity… a way of living by the beat of another heart, and tasting another soul on one's lips." -Cyrano de Bergerac
Musketeers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,643 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 9/30/2014 - Published: 9/19/2014 - Aramis, D'Artagnan, Constance Bonacieux
Grey in the Dark by Eildon Rhymer reviews
Fog has descended on the lower levels of Minas Tirith, and a killer stalks the streets. In the Citadel above the fog, Aragorn wants the killer found. Down where the fog is thickest, a young man raised on the streets is trying to find him, too. These two men, whose lives are so very different, will end up being brought together by the fog. Because in the fog, everything is changed.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,268 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/27/2014 - Aragorn, OC, Faramir - Complete
Through Shadows by Thanwen reviews
Do you believe in love at first sight? I do not, no matter what the Professor tells us. So here comes my attempt of a plausible and hopefully entertaining story why and how Éowyn and Faramir came to love each other. Classical gap filler; strictly book-verse.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 40 - Words: 260,277 - Reviews: 725 - Favs: 301 - Follows: 168 - Updated: 9/18/2014 - Published: 8/27/2013 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
GDIME-So long and thanks for all the fish by sian22 reviews
In honour of the end of a brilliant parody-Annafan's favourite limerick tweaked just a little, with thanks for all the fun and effort that went into it. Rated T because 'nudge, nudge, wink, wink' it is about beards and exits. Red beards of course. 'Hacha Bain'
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 87 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Published: 8/13/2014
Matchmaker, Matchmaker by PI-Valkyrie-exLorien reviews
Tauriel joins the Fellowship as a matchmaking 10th Walker, determined to ship Aragorn and Legolas to avoid the love triangle Peter Jackson has planned for her. Along the way, she falls for the most unexpected of canon characters and pits herself against an evil Mary Sue. Slash, femslash, completely AU silliness. Low T for slight language and occasional innuendo. Now complete.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 18 - Words: 36,109 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 8/12/2014 - Published: 1/17/2014 - Aragorn, Legolas - Complete
A bitter winnowing by sian22 reviews
Faramir, charged with retaking Osgiliath by his father, searches for the courage to do his duty as he walks the Great Hall of Minas Tirith. Written for the June Teitho Fanfiction Challenge on the theme "No time'.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,329 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/18/2014 - Faramir - Complete
The Awkward Adventures of Meghan Whimblesby by FebruarySong reviews
What happens when a girl who is afraid of blood, thinks Legolas is a complete moron, and knows next to nothing about LotR gets dumped into Middle earth with the Fellowship? Crazy spin on a MarySue fic. Now complete.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 46 - Words: 112,684 - Reviews: 2473 - Favs: 1,904 - Follows: 1,400 - Updated: 7/14/2014 - Published: 7/14/2007 - [Legolas, OC] - Complete
A Little R and R by Zoop reviews
10th Walker decides to ditch the Fellowship after Helm's Deep. Tired of killing orcs, she drags an Uruk survivor along for the ride. Seductions, arguments, and discussions about the best way to "serve" man ensue.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 44 - Words: 112,061 - Reviews: 279 - Favs: 292 - Follows: 327 - Updated: 7/2/2014 - Published: 10/19/2011 - Uruk-hai, Human, OC
Lost in Translation by sian22 reviews
And now for something completely different: fluff, happy fluff, suggestive even. Faramir returns to work after a month long honeymoon. He may never look at council meetings the same way again.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,446 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/4/2014 - Aragorn, Eowyn, Faramir, Imrahil - Complete
I Heard It Through the Grapevine(of Delicious Mirkwood Wine…) by Lasgalendil reviews
On women, tropes, and the thrice-dreaded supernatural interspecies love triangle. Rumors of a certain movie and fanfics have reached Middle-earth and characters are not amused. Can Tauriel convince the canon that their reasons for hating her are wrong? Legolas laments, Tauriel teaches, and Gimli…Gimli is just Gimli. (Elessar's General Warning: meta fics may contain strong satire.)
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 14,061 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 4/30/2014 - Published: 12/8/2013 - Legolas, Kíli, Tauriel - Complete
Ashtuzual - the Orc and the Ranger by TMI Fairy reviews
In 2981 TA two Rangers free several women of different races from orc and mannish slavers in Northern Eriador. A gap-filler about how the Dunedain of the North, Dunlendings, Breelanders and others live, spanning over a decade. A tale of their customs, political intrigues, social mores, of the Rangers in particular. And a forbidden love of the sort which shall not be mentioned.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 49 - Words: 91,005 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 3/11/2014 - Published: 10/6/2013 - [OC, Orc] Aragorn, Dwarf - Complete
Heroes Don't Hate Their Lives by McJunker reviews
After the War of the Ring, a Gondorian soldier is left adrift in a sea of bureaucracy, alcoholism, and depression.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,811 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 2/23/2014
Some Other Beginning's End by Determamfidd reviews
(Written for Gigolas Week). There are first times that matter. And then there are those that never end. (Gimli/Legolas, Oneshot)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,081 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 111 - Follows: 19 - Published: 2/15/2014 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
Of Spices and Stewed Goat by Eildon Rhymer reviews
Faramir receives an unexpected visitor in the wilds of Ithilien, leading to an afternoon of wine, cooking and memories.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,509 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/1/2014 - Boromir, Faramir - Complete
Royals by Sookie Starchild reviews
Legolas is a straight-laced EBI agent. Gimli is an uncontrollable hurricane of justice working with the Dale PD. Can they find a way to work together to stop a drug lord known only as The Necromancer? Based on the film The Heat, done by request. Lots of profanity, vulgarisms, obscenities and fantastical racism.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 20 - Words: 25,951 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 1/15/2014 - Published: 12/17/2013 - Legolas, Gimli
Promises by CSHL reviews
The sequel to "40 Days" that answers the questions, "What happened when our lost Rebels returned to the Alliance? How did Leia cope with the loss of the man she loves, and what were the reactions to their relationship? How was the rescue for Han planned? And the burning question I know you all can't wait to find out…How does Leia feel about Han's response on Bespin?"
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 43,712 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 12/23/2013 - Published: 11/1/2012 - Leia O., Han S.
Dear Writers of FanFiction by A Vulcan's Kiss reviews
The ℱellowship of The ℛing would like to have a few words with us concerning some of the cliché stories that are abundant on this branch. I suppose we can say that the most of them are a tad bit peeved • Canon and Pairings, mostly • Will accept Requests/Suggestions • Chapter 47: "Treebeard ON - Run, Forest, RUN!" • Please Read • T for safety • R&R! • 100,000 HITS! • CH47UP!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 47 - Words: 6,390 - Reviews: 1347 - Favs: 335 - Follows: 302 - Updated: 12/11/2013 - Published: 2/22/2013 - Aragorn, Legolas, Arwen U., Elrond
A marriage born of cold calculation by TMI Fairy reviews
Miriel needs to replace her husband fallen in the War of the Ring. She needs a man to guard her, her children and the estate until her son comes of age. Hastogur is an ugly Ranger of the North. He has ambitions going beyond an unmarked grave in the Lone Lands. Riding with the Grey Company gives an opportunity to change it. Slightly AU - Hastogur is Aragorn's relative.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,212 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/5/2013 - OC - Complete
Just Paw-sitively Purr-fect by OogieBoogie reviews
During an Auror mission gone wrong, Malfoy was turned into something not-human. And until they find a proper cure that won't kill him, he is placed under the care of one who has experience with such beings. Yes, Hermione Granger.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 22,913 - Reviews: 302 - Favs: 1,257 - Follows: 350 - Updated: 9/24/2013 - Published: 9/8/2013 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Kiss me by TMI Fairy reviews
AU. Eomer dies at Black Gates and Eowyn is shaken out of brooding and gets busy.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,837 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/23/2013 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
Tomorrow by Scotch reviews
What if tomorrow will be the end of everything? What then? Elrond/Gil-Galad. Oneshot.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,287 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/19/2013 - [Elrond, E. Gil-Galad] - Complete
The Last of the Stewards by Ark ThirtySix reviews
Thanks to Éomer's involvement and the well-intentioned interference of Beregond, the first week of her marriage to Faramir does not go as Éowyn had hoped.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 11,212 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 6 - Published: 7/12/2013 - Eowyn, Faramir, Eomer - Complete
Adventures of the Fanfiction Fellowship by Terreis reviews
Read and review, please! As their battle with fanfiction draws to a close, the Fanfiction Fellowship realizes they have to say goodbye to one another. And then they realize that maybe getting rid of fanfiction wasn't the BEST idea they ever had...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 25 - Words: 78,032 - Reviews: 121 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 7/5/2013 - Published: 5/13/2009 - Arwen U., Eowyn, Elrohir, Glorfindel - Complete
Speaking the Words (Carnal Spirits) by ladypeter reviews
When Leia was a girl, they called it "talking dirty," and she found the whole concept distasteful. What she didn't understand was the power that words could have to drive passion. Here's how she gained that understanding. Part of the "Carnal Spirits" series.
Star Wars - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,019 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 9 - Published: 6/13/2013 - Leia O., Han S. - Complete
In Fading Light by milgarion reviews
""You should go." Legolas spoke, the whispered words more a sibilant arrangement of air between his lips, stained with the sweet and sickly smell of blood." - not all battles can go to plan. slash.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 23 - Words: 64,719 - Reviews: 151 - Favs: 108 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 4/2/2013 - Published: 12/14/2012 - Aragorn, Legolas
Une Cruche en Terre du Milieu by CryForTheMoon reviews
Une autre parodie 100% Marysuesque ! Gloria est une jeune fille passionnée de la saga LSDA, a un gros faible pour le beau Legolas et désire le rencontrer... Ardemment ! Un jour, elle débarque mystérieusement en Terre du Milieu...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - French - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,740 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 3/25/2013 - Published: 2/29/2012 - Estella B.
Imrahil's Daughters by Lialathuveril reviews
A chance encounter in a linen cupboard in the Houses of Healing has unforeseen consequences as Éomer of Rohan finds himself caught between two very different women. However, things are not quite as they seem: a tale of love, deception and bees.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 61,995 - Reviews: 395 - Favs: 261 - Follows: 151 - Updated: 1/14/2013 - Published: 9/3/2012 - Lothíriel, Eomer - Complete
The Rules of Negotiation by BlueNynaeve reviews
Lothiriel thinks marriage is a contract and it is her job to teach Eomer what that means. But in teaching, she learns more about... her embarrassing wedding night.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,715 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 11 - Published: 12/29/2012 - Eomer, Lothíriel
Liquid Numbers by Isabeau of Greenlea reviews
Gondor's Geek Prince finds a kindred spirit at last.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,014 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/21/2012 - Amrothos - Complete
No Whining Allowed by jzhanfan reviews
A humorous re-do of the original trilogy featuring all the usual suspects. A mother-daughter fan fiction collaboration in which Luke is not rescued on Hoth but suffers life-altering injuries instead... and the SW galaxy becomes a Whine-Free Zone. Rated K for a few mild expletives and excessive use of alliteration.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,292 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Published: 7/19/2012 - Leia O., Luke S. - Complete
Simulating Life by prisoner2187 reviews
A new training simulator on base sparks the continuing development of Han and Leia's friendship/relationship.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,348 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 12/18/2011 - Published: 12/7/2011 - Leia O., Han S. - Complete
Choppy Waters by Thanwen reviews
While in Dol Amroth for trade negotiations in the summer of 3020, Éomer, King of the Mark, encounters Lothíriel of Dol Amroth for the first time and a catenation of misunderstandings and conflictive emotions lead to a race of life and death.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 17 - Words: 76,101 - Reviews: 209 - Favs: 258 - Follows: 119 - Updated: 9/21/2011 - Published: 6/18/2011 - Eomer, Lothíriel - Complete
Scattered Leaves by Eldalie reviews
When Míriel came to Mirkwood, Legolas found love. But when she goes visiting her native land of Ithilien and meets the Captain of Gondor, things may happen that even the wisdom of the Elves cannot prevent...MEFA 2010 NOMINEE
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 42,357 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 4/20/2010 - Published: 2/24/2010 - Legolas, Faramir - Complete
Author's Notes by Geale reviews
Being Aragorn is not very easy, not when you have heavy writing duties, a Quest to Mount Doom to undertake, and one jealous lover with an unhealthy love of words. Rated M for SLASH, occasional dying, poetry, and general madness.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 78,520 - Reviews: 196 - Favs: 167 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 2/9/2010 - Published: 8/17/2008 - Aragorn, Legolas - Complete
Talk to Me by Sara's Girl reviews
When the usual channels of communication are shut down, the most surprising people can find a way in. A strange little love story. HPDM slash, AU 7th-year fluffy!verse.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,550 - Reviews: 538 - Favs: 2,731 - Follows: 331 - Published: 9/25/2009 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Foundations by Sara's Girl reviews
When one door closes, another one opens... with a bit of a push. Life, love and complications. Sequel to Reparations. HPDM slash. COMPLETED.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 249,430 - Reviews: 1051 - Favs: 1,784 - Follows: 315 - Updated: 8/1/2009 - Published: 5/8/2009 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
First Time by Lady Bluejay reviews
Will Elladan and Elrohir decide to help out a lady? A very short story. Complete.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,031 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 6/28/2009 - Published: 1/8/2009 - Elrohir, Eomer - Complete
Reparations by Sara's Girl reviews
Harry is about to discover that the steepest learning curve comes after Healer training, and that second chances can be found in unexpected places. HPDM pre-slash/slash. Now completed.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 92,767 - Reviews: 1335 - Favs: 3,232 - Follows: 521 - Updated: 4/10/2009 - Published: 2/5/2009 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
The Other Kiss That Changed Everything by LittleCatt reviews
Some say the Bespin kiss changed everything, but there was another kiss that occured not long before that tends to get overlooked.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,533 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/10/2009 - Leia O., Han S. - Complete
The Safest Place On Earth by ducky72 reviews
My take on Abby’s “Can I stay with you tonight”.
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 413 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 5 - Published: 11/3/2008 - Abby S., Leroy Jethro Gibbs - Complete
Seeing Stars by Raksha The Demon reviews
Faramir celebrates the birth of his heir with new friends, old memories, ancient history, and a bit too much to drink. thanks to betas LadyBranwyn and Lindahoyland, and to Tanaqui as Dunedain Inebriation Consultant . First Place, MEFA 2008.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,407 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/4/2008 - Faramir, Aragorn - Complete
The Bet by ness345 reviews
A one shot about a bet set by the Rouge Squadron surrounding Han and Leia. Han/Leia romance. May become a series of oneshots
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 627 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 10 - Published: 7/28/2008 - Leia O., Han S.
Waterloo by Lady Bluejay reviews
No one who had endured the Siege of Minas Tirith or lived through the Battle of the Pelennor Fields emerged unscathed. Either in mind or body, all were affected in some way. Lothíriel only played a small part but her experiences changed her life. Complete
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 12,890 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 187 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 1/7/2008 - Published: 1/5/2008 - Lothíriel, Eomer - Complete
A Dance, Your Worship by BatmansBabe reviews
Luke began to notice that, more often than not, when he went to check up on Han, Leia was already there. She ate Han’s smuggled food rather than the rations while admonishing him for not sharing it with the rest of the base
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,131 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 147 - Follows: 19 - Published: 5/4/2007 - Han S., Leia O. - Complete
Unexpected Detours by Scarlet Scully reviews
It usually doesn't take 3 years to turn sexual tension into a relationship. Here's my take on why our couple is still fighting in ESB. HanLeia. Some smut and other mature subject matter. Finally complete!
Star Wars - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 43,508 - Reviews: 162 - Favs: 152 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 1/7/2007 - Published: 7/3/2006 - Han S., Leia O. - Complete
Book Learning by LadyBranwyn reviews
In the libraries of Minas Tirith, Faramir had learned the abstract lore of numbers and the healing secrets of herbs, yet his studies had not included this, the most arcane of subjects. Rated M for acts of matrimony. Written in honor of Raksha the Demon.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,104 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 11/2/2006 - Published: 6/13/2006 - Faramir, Eowyn - Complete
Black Eyes by Lialathuveril reviews
King Éomer of Rohan and Princess Lothiriel of Dol Amroth – surely the perfect political alliance, but what if the lady is not willing and decides to use unconventional means to get out of this arrangement? My second scenario.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 32,626 - Reviews: 328 - Favs: 426 - Follows: 80 - Updated: 7/21/2006 - Published: 5/23/2006 - Lothíriel, Eomer - Complete
Not A Nice Man by SoloFalcon reviews
Han lets his own life experiences help Leia and Luke deal with the losses in their lives. Set shortly after the battle of Yavin, between A New Hope and Empire.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 30,577 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 7 - Published: 4/13/2006 - Han S., Leia O. - Complete
After The Storm by Sar-kaz-m reviews
Completed. Movieverse gapfiller, FaramirEowyn. Sequel to Points of Precedence. How Faramir and Eowyn came together. Completed.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 36,850 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 202 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 1/2/2006 - Published: 10/31/2005 - Faramir, Eowyn - Complete
Comfort Me Not With Cookies by Raksha The Demon reviews
Being the condensed version of an epic tale that I would never, ever write! Faramir Angst! Legolas-passion! A plucky OFC! It's a movie-verse AU parody, for your viewing pleasure. Complete.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,387 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/31/2005 - Faramir - Complete
Valentine's Day by Erestor reviews
Legolas emerged. He was wearing silken blue pajamas, his blonde hair was tousled, and his grey eyes were only half open. “What’s going on?" he asked. "Are we under attack?” Erestor smirked. “Not yet,” he said.'
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,014 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 19 - Published: 2/14/2005 - Legolas - Complete
The Slash Fairy Cometh by cyberwulf reviews
Parody. Theoden and Denethor hunt the Slash Fairy after she makes them... do things. WARNING: non-explicit slash.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,495 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/12/2004 - Complete
Gift Horses by Some Jedi Girl reviews
Eowyn only wants to escape the Houses of Healing and a sad future in Rohan.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,376 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/2/2004 - Eowyn, Faramir
Fairdinkum Faramir by clairon reviews
After a confusing conversation with Boromir, Denethor finds he has more in common with Faramir than he imagined. A response to A'mael Taren's February Challenge: "Portray the relationship of Faramir and Denethor in a positive light."
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 971 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 6 - Published: 2/12/2004 - Faramir, Boromir
Both Fang and Fire by Erestor reviews
A dog falls into MiddleEarth instead of her beautiful, but stupid, owner. She meets the obnoxiously charming Glorfindel and becomes involved in the happenings at Rivendell. EDITED February '07.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 19,001 - Reviews: 137 - Favs: 150 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 2/2/2004 - Published: 12/5/2003 - Glorfindel, Erestor - Complete
FARAMIR: Owner's Guide and Manual by lalaithien reviews
PG for mild innuendo. This is an homage to the brilliant Owner's Guides by Theresa Green, which I adore. If you enjoy, write a review and let me know!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,079 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 7 - Published: 11/28/2003 - Faramir
Horses and Verses by Isabeau of Greenlea reviews
Cowritten with Altariel. After Theoden's funeral feast, Eomer and Faramir have a little chat.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,104 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 5 - Published: 3/9/2003 - Complete
Hello? Two Kings by tbossjenn reviews
Faramir seeks answers regarding a certain movie
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,817 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/31/2003 - Faramir
Blood And Warm Blankets by Kielle reviews
Eomer and Faramir are trapped in a nefarious web of (*gasp*) slash cliches! Light metahumor.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,020 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/14/2002 - Faramir
Mary Sue's Ugly Divorce by The Evil Old Woman reviews
So.... say a modern girl falls into Middle-Earth and snags Legolas. Do you think it’d last? Hah! If you’re sick of Mary-Sue, click in and see her exposed to her worst nightmare... reality! BWAHAHAHAHA!!! (Canon-sensitive and proofread)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,990 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/3/2002
The Official Fanfiction University of Middleearth by misscam reviews
The fic that spawned miniBalrogs, Elrond's Naturally Nine, the MorgothSauron feud, Urple, the WitchWall and finally, Gimli got the girl.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 64 - Words: 66,366 - Reviews: 3186 - Favs: 2,017 - Follows: 238 - Updated: 7/12/2002 - Published: 3/8/2002 - Complete
I finally settle the "Great Hair Debate"! by The Evil Old Woman reviews
Tolkien scholars have spend enough time arguing about Legolas' hair color - so I present the only possible answer! (A parody of Tolkien scholarship that contains actual research. Hopefully funny; at least canon and proofread.)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,062 - Reviews: 1697 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/25/2002
Left Out by Victoria Bitter reviews
**SLASH** The kind of Mary Sue fic we'd like to see...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 822 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/23/2002
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .
The Antiquarian reviews
A modern-day AU Hitchcock parody, for Sian, Altariel and Borys's Christmas. Mild mannered Faramir owns an antiquarian bookshop. Enter a mysterious icy blonde, apparently casing the appartment block opposite. Boromir lives (and has found some interesting antiquarian smut in their late father's book collection). CW: genuine antiquarian smut (but not explicit!)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,266 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 12/24 - Boromir, Eowyn, Faramir
The Epistles reviews
What happened between the kiss on the walls and the troth plighting in Edoras? And why did the dressmakers have to take such care over the cut of Eowyn's wedding dress? The answer lies in a series of letters and diary entries. Part of my "Silk Road Series", sequel to Dear Diary.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 30 - Words: 12,402 - Reviews: 168 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 4/12 - Published: 7/4/2020 - [Eowyn, Faramir] Eomer - Complete
Miss Congeniality reviews
Christmas. When the bad guys get a break from the attention of fanfic writers, and the good guys are very, very frightened. Christmas crossover madness. Merry Christmas, Sian. (M only for language
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,479 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/27/2020 - Gimli, Galadriel, Eowyn, Faramir
Categorical Imperative reviews
Two rangers, separated by fifty years, watch political decision making collide with moral principle. First place in the Teitho Challenge "Good of the Many." (Content warning: plague and pandemic.)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,090 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/22/2020 - Aragorn, Faramir, Denethor
Tales from the Silk Road reviews
A collection of one-shots/short pieces about characters from my Hazard Heart/ Silk Road series. (1) Siliveth and Úron (2) Chang and Laerwen The first piece is a present for Thanwen, who suggested this outcome to Siliveth's dalliances at Cormallen.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,870 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 7/27/2020 - Published: 5/29/2020 - Ivriniel
Decameron reviews
What do we need right now? A fourth age soap opera! Men, Elves, Dwarves and of course Hobbits. Friendship, family, love, lust. Intrigue, skirmishes, espionage. Adventure on an epic canvas. And hobbits on a (modest) quest. Featuring all our favourite canon characters plus OC aplenty.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 17,032 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 6/8/2020 - Published: 4/12/2020 - Aragorn, Eowyn, Faramir, Eomer
Citadel of the Ladies reviews
What are women supposed to do when their men ride off to a pointless war? A Middle Earth retelling of a possibly recognisable tale. Written for the Teitho Challenge "Rebellion". Beware - sexual innuendo (nothing graphic though).
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,357 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/17/2020 - Aragorn, Arwen U.
Kitten Kong reviews
For Altariel, because we are sadvat the death of comedic genuis Tim Brooke Taylor, and also "the lovely Samantharwen" needed to make it into a fic. The faked-up news report of "Twinkle" knocking over the Post Office Tower is an abiding memory of my childhood, so of course it had to be Middle-Earth-ified. (And with thanks to Sian22 for inspiration - parents tell stories to kids.)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,829 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/13/2020 - Aragorn, Arwen U., Eldarion
Adding Insult to Injury reviews
A chance youtube viewing of Matt from Scholagladiatoria talking about his "5 worst weapons" from Lord of the Rings set this plot bunny up and running. Because we all need a bit of crackfic in these difficult days. Movie-verse. M just for language, nothing else.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 438 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Published: 3/21/2020 - Eowyn, Witch-King of Angmar
Ballista reviews
Sometimes relationships are between people, sometimes they are between objects, and sometimes they can be between numbers. Erchirion puts some of Faramir's geometrical theories to an all-important practical test during the Siege of Gondor. Joint first place in the Teitho challenge "Relationships."
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,575 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/18/2020 - Faramir, Erchirion, Imrahil - Complete
Te Amo, Tantissimo reviews
Come mantenere sensuale il vostro matrimonio. Con gentile riconoscimento alla scena in A Fish called Wanda, in cui John Cleese parla russo. How to keep your marriage exciting. With grateful thanks to the "speaking Russian" scene in a Fish called Wanda. Translation of Amo, Amas, I love a lass.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - Italian - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 163 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 3/15/2020 - Eowyn, Faramir
The Knight before Mettarë reviews
AU silliness, loosely based on that made-for-TV gem, "The Knight Before Christmas". A Christmas present for Sian. Do not expect anything profound, or indeed anything other than complete crackfic. "Oops, it's gone and got itself a plot!"
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 46,334 - Reviews: 101 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 3/2/2020 - Published: 1/1/2020 - [Eowyn, Faramir] Eomer - Complete
La Petite Mort reviews
In which much is made of the subtle differences between Sindarin as spoken in Gondor and by the Silvan Elves, we learn some Quenya and grapple with the subjunctive mood in Rohirric. Basically smut (mild M).
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,919 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/20/2020 - Eowyn, Faramir, Lothíriel
Blueprint 75159: an affectionate parody reviews
So, there are now rather a lot of fix-its out there. And I love them, and I love the people who write them. But -profound apologies - I cannot resist parody. So here it is, a parody fix-it, in which our characters are not entirely happy with their parts. There will be out-of-character moments, and high (bordering on ridiculous) passion. Buckle up and enjoy the ride!
Star Wars - Rated: M - English - Parody/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 34,467 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 1/15/2020 - Published: 1/19/2017 - [Jyn E., Cassian A.] - Complete
Hazard Heart reviews
Cormallen, shortly after victory. The King of Rohan needs a wife - at least this is what his advisors tell him. Repeatedly. But certainly not a flighty social butterfly. Or a girl straight out of the schoolroom. Meanwhile, the last thing the youngest princess of Dol Amroth wants is a husband. She has far more interesting plans. Sequel to Howzat, and Dear Diary.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 81,883 - Reviews: 203 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 118 - Updated: 4/20/2019 - Published: 10/14/2016 - [Eomer, Lothíriel] Ivriniel - Complete
The Fall of Gilgalad reviews
Eowyn discovers Faramir and her children tending to an unexpected new addition to the family. Pure, unadulterated syrup! Happy Belated Birthday, Sian.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,007 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/9/2018 - Eowyn, Faramir
Love at first sight reviews
A follow up to A Tight Space - and a cheer-up present for a friend. Faramir paces the corridor waiting for news of Eowyn.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 812 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 13 - Published: 3/18/2017
The Thread and the Vibroblade reviews
Rogue One gave us lingering glances that could set the world on fire - but what was going on in Jyn's head? Canon, not a fix-it. Major spoilers for Rogue One. Jyn/Cassian
Star Wars - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,072 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/31/2016 - [Jyn E., Cassian A.] - Complete
Qualmë reviews
Because sometimes the law is stacked against women, and sometimes the law is an ass, and sometimes we need a good fantasy about a shieldmaiden who can right wrongs. (Trigger warnings - rape, albeit off screen, rape trials, horrible defence arguments).
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,985 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 17 - Published: 10/16/2016 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
The Pale Rider reviews
Anorien, TA2980. An eleven year old girl watches a mysterious stranger ride into town. It is the start of a sequence of strange and dangerous events that take a town already perched on the edge of violence into chaos. Will the chaos end in destruction or redemption?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,211 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 10/13/2016 - Published: 9/8/2016
Dear Diary reviews
I know it's been done before, but I couldn't resist. Éowyn and Faramir's diaries from the Houses of Healing. Part of the "Silk Road" series (Howzat, and Whenas in Silks).
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 21 - Words: 17,459 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 10/4/2016 - Published: 9/9/2016 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
Smooth Operator reviews
Ah, fanon tropes, gotta love 'em. Boromir the misogynist. Boromir the womaniser. Boromir the naive ingenue just waiting for a 21st century 10th walker to show him the delights love has to offer. So what was the real Boromir like? Crackfic? As if I would! (Author assumes slightly offended, innocent expression).
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 558 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/11/2016 - Boromir, Faramir
The Victors Sing the Loudest Songs reviews
A Dunlending woman in Bree muses on the arrival of King Elessar and his retinue. (Grim. A million miles from my usual fluffy output. I'm not normally one for trigger warnings, but in this case, be warned, this tackles racism, rape, forced abortion and infanticide. None of it is graphic, however, hence still being a T rating.)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,264 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/8/2016 - Complete
Brassed Under reviews
So, I am in mourning because the totally wonderful Victoria Wood died this week at the all-too-young age of 62. She was brilliant - stand up, parody, script writing, comic songs - she did it all. So here (shamelessly channelling her parody of Brassed Off) is my tribute - Victoria Wood as tenth walker, joining the fellowship in the Mines of Moria. RIP Victoria.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,124 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 3 - Published: 4/23/2016 - Gandalf, Aragorn, Boromir, Legolas
A tight space reviews
AU - Eowyn is sent to Ithilien by her brother to get her away from Edoras and Wormtongue. Promped by Sian making an off-hand remark about Rangers in tight spaces, then adding that this was just what she wanted to take her mind off her migraine. Started out as PWP migraine cure, but has now taken on a life of its own - AU all the way through to Pelennor and Houses of Healing.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 63,709 - Reviews: 186 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 3/16/2016 - Published: 1/31/2015 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
Pearl Buttons reviews
Two days before Éowyn and Faramir's wedding, Éomer makes an unexpected discovery. Written for Wheelrider's Valentine's challenge: write a canonical wedding night for Éowyn and Faramir. Part of "How do I love thee? Let me count the ways."
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,805 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 2/17/2016 - Published: 2/14/2016 - Eowyn, Faramir, Eomer, Elfhelm - Complete
Erulaitalë reviews
A Christmas present for Sian - a gap filler based on her wonderful fic, The Bride Price. We know Elphir's wife, Mareth, lied with a straight face (much to Aragorn's admiration) as to who painted the symbols on Faramir's body. But who did do it? No real prizes for guessing, but the fun is in the telling. Very mild M, could probably get away with T.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,501 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/29/2015 - Eowyn, Faramir
The strangest ship in the galaxy reviews
So many questions... Both before and after seeing TFA. What new "ships" would grace the pages of fanfic dot net? Which would be the most unlikely? Would we ever find out why R2D2 shut down for so long, only to wake at an amazingly convenient moment for the script writers? Possible slash if you squint, new warning tag of "TPreg". Definite crackfic. Merry Christmas Lady Peter.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,811 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/24/2015 - Leia O., Han S., R2-D2, C-3PO
Elegy reviews
An elderly man and his grandson visit the sun-baked stone quarries of the Isle of Tolfalas. Second place in the Teitho Challenge "Stones".
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,687 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Published: 11/16/2015 - Aragorn, Arwen U. - Complete
Howzat! reviews
The Field of Cormallen wasn't all jousting and tourneys... No, the flower of Gondor's knighthood had other pastimes, pastimes which the Rohirrim found confusing, to say the least. Inspired by the distinctly Aussie twang of Lena1987's Eomer. G'Day! (M only for the rather earthy language, no other reason). Part 1 of "The Silk Road".
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,607 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/8/2015 - Eomer, Lothíriel, Amrothos, Eothain
Even educated fleas do it reviews
In Lady Bluejay's wonderful Tide of Destiny, a rather embarrassed Eomer rather belatedly asks Eowyn if she's talked to anyone about what to expect on her wedding night. She breezily replies, "Faramir, of course." Now, how could one resist wondering how that conversation went? A comedy about having "THE TALK". With thanks to Lady Bluejay. New chapter because Hilde got inside my head
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,159 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 6/12/2015 - Published: 5/9/2015 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
Whenas in Silks reviews
First summer in a new job! Aragorn faces council meetings (one, exceptionally boring), weddings (two, lovely) and looming diplomatic crises with allies (one, narrowly averted). Written for April's Teitho challenge, "Raiment", where it took joint second place. Part 4 of "The Silk Road".
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,311 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 21 - Published: 5/18/2015 - Aragorn, Faramir, Imrahil - Complete
The Princeling reviews
What if Faramir had still been unconscious when Eowyn went to look for the ruler of the city to ask permission to follow the host to the Black Gate? An AU re-imagining of the Houses of Healing/ Steward and King chapters in which everything unfolds rather differently.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,264 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 4 - Published: 4/30/2015 - [Eowyn, Lothíriel] - Complete
Flower of Ice and Steel reviews
"When I first looked on her and perceived her unhappiness, it seemed to me that I saw a white flower standing straight and proud, shapely as a lily, and yet knew that it was hard, as if wrought by elf-wrights out of steel. Or was it, maybe, a frost that had turned its sap to ice, and so it stood, bitter-sweet, still fair to see, but stricken, soon to fall and die?" (JRR Tolkien)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 29 - Words: 153,924 - Reviews: 279 - Favs: 164 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 3/11/2015 - Published: 9/9/2013 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
The Bequest reviews
Dear, departed Aunt Beryl turns out to have... well, a skeleton in the closet isn't entirely accurate, but it's not far off. Not so much a work of fanfiction as a work about fanfiction. A bit weird... and as for the humour and romance tags... that's very dark humour and seriously twisted romance. Mild M only for the acts referred to, nothing explicit at all.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,939 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/4/2015 - OC
The Red Tower of Ecthelion reviews
An exhausted Lothiriel takes refuge from her day of helping the Healers during the battle of Pelennor. She falls asleep in a half-ruined guard tower on the walls, but is awakened by the arrival of a battle weary warrior, a horselord from the north.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,206 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 48 - Published: 1/19/2015 - Eomer, Lothíriel
Real Men Take Responsibility reviews
An unusually quiet day for Sleepy Hollow PD, when Captain Irving gets an unexpected visitor. Inspired by Orlando Jones joking about the sort of fanfic he'd like to read about his character... An affectionate parody (sorry, everyone, just can't resist parody). Set late series 1.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,597 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Published: 1/2/2015 - Captain F. Irving, Abigail M., Ichabod C., Headless Horseman
Surrender to the Steward reviews
What would happen if Eowyn and Faramir were to come upon a stack of rather racy, badly written, Harlequin-like books... Books featuring themselves? A parody of bad sex writing (hopefully with some more entertaining smut too). Plot? What plot?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,126 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/6/2014 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
Because second best is pretty good reviews
Apologies. I'm on a bit of a crack-fic roll at the moment. So anyway - Laws and Customs of the Eldar has always struck me as more than a bit implausible. So, it was a dark and stormy night in Meduseld...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 509 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Published: 10/5/2014 - Aragorn, Legolas, Eowyn
Adventures of a Tenth Roadie reviews
We're all familiar with the tenth walker story, in which a teenager from our world (usually with suitably angsty back story) falls into Middle Earth. But what of the reverse? What happens when a teenager from Middle Earth falls into our world? What sort of quest awaits her? Who will be the other half of her OTP? Another Tommy Ginger/Annafan collaboration. 100% pure crack fic.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,144 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Published: 10/4/2014
Groundhog GDIME reviews
Charlize has read all the fanfics, she knows all the tricks... All she has to do is follow the tried and tested methods for falling into Middle Earth, and she'll get the elven prince of her dreams. And if at first you don't succeed, try, try again... and again... and again. Not a Legomance (but not for want of trying on Charlize's part). The fic where everyone gets a happy ending!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 34 - Words: 79,835 - Reviews: 256 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 9/23/2014 - Published: 9/2/2013 - Human, Legolas, Boromir, Aragorn - Complete
Beginnings reviews
Why did it take Han and Leia three years to start to get close to one another? Perhaps it's because, in the middle of a war, you have other stuff to think about. Or perhaps losing your whole planet puts a damper on things. Han gets caught up in an argument among the top brass, and finds himself caught up in mission planning with "Princess Death Wish." Happy Birthday, Lady Peter!
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,893 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/15/2014
Redware reviews
Trying to get a moment alone away from their chaperones, Eowyn and Faramir explore Minas Tirith shortly before their wedding. Sometimes a little bit of art history can prove... inspirational. Plot? What plot. ;-)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,288 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/13/2014 - Eowyn, Faramir
There reviews
"The war has cost Rohan two kings and one prince – I only ask for one steward in return." AU – Éomer fell at the Black Gate and Éowyn is now Queen of Rohan. To avoid her nobles manoeuvring her into marrying one of their own who would then become the power behind the throne, Éowyn proposes to Faramir instead. What happens when he arrives in Edoras? Sequel to Borys68's Kiss Me.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,364 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/2/2014 - Eowyn, Faramir
The Little Wooden Horse reviews
It is not often that King Theoden finds himself confronted with a situation he does not know how to handle, but choosing a birthday present for a small girl is one of them.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,122 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/11/2014 - Théoden, Eomer, Eowyn
Who will guard the guardians? reviews
A little Frankenstein's ficlet of a crack fic. We're all familiar with those modern day AU versions where Gandalf is a high school teacher, Legolas an eco warrior, etc. etc. This is what happens when instead of a fresh-faced teenage self-insert, two middle aged ladies write themselves into an AU fic with the brothers Hurin. Collaboration with Tommy Ginger.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 887 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 2/1/2014 - Boromir, Faramir, OC
Christmas Lecture reviews
A random piece of Christmas fluffiness for all who liked Adventures outside Middle Earth. Gimli has come up with a suggestion for what Legolas can do to fill his time. Cover art by mini-Annafan. Inspired by R. Brown's work.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,580 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/24/2013 - [Legolas, OC]
Night on the Plains reviews
Out on the plains of Rohan, Eowyn recalls a night in Minas Tirith. An out-take from "Flower of Ice and Steel" which didn't quite fit, and a Christmas present for Tommy Ginger. Gratuitous smut and comedy.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,290 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 14 - Published: 12/24/2013 - [Eowyn, Faramir]
Change a line, ruin a movie franchise reviews
A variation on that old game "change a word, ruin a movie". Does exactly what it says on the tin. A Christmas present for Lady Peter. A cast of thousands, and nothing is sacred.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 984 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/24/2013 - Luke S., Leia O., Han S., Darth Vader
Adventures outside Middle Earth reviews
Middle Earth is suffering yet another invasion of Mary Sues. What can Galadriel do to rescue Legolas from his pursuers? Send him to another world, of course. What could possibly go wrong? Adventure, humour, a spot (OK, a lot) of Legolas/OC romance. And poor old Haldir's life is spiralling out of control. Rated T for swearing, sexual references, and silliness. And very AU.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 30 - Words: 78,865 - Reviews: 200 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 9/10/2013 - Published: 3/18/2013 - Legolas, Galadriel, Haldir - Complete
A Single Barrel reviews
Alternative version of chapter 19 of Adventures outside Middle Earth: the encounter that was "glossed over" in the T-rated version. Helena has been looking after her "ethereally beautiful" visitor from another world since he appeared from nowhere, wounded and in need of help. M for a reason, please do not read if sexual scenes aren't your thing, or if you're not old enough.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,945 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/29/2013 - Published: 7/16/2013 - Legolas, Human
Her Beautiful Back reviews
During an intimate moment, Han reflects on how they got this far together, and what he wants from the relationship. M for a reason.
Star Wars - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 696 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/13/2013 - Leia O., Han S.
Tell me about the first time reviews
Luke is out drinking with the Rogues when the conversation starts to go places Luke just doesn't want it to. Who can spare him his blushes? T for sexual innuendo.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 843 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/1/2013 - Han S., Leia O., Luke S. - Complete
Just another day on Hoth reviews
Luke watches the Rogues as they watch Leia and Han have another spectacular argument. My first fan fic, please be gentle!
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 576 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/3/2013 - Leia O., Han S.