Chapter 246: Leah's Back

I was slowly woken by voices around me, but my eyes remained shut. I felt too tired to even open my eyes. Maybe I can open them when I am ready to face reality again. I..don't know if I want to face it just yet.. I took this time to feel where I was placed. I noticed that I was laid on a bed, with a blanket placed over me. There were gloves on my hands. I noticed that I had bandages around my neck. I felt the soreness around my neck and hands. My hands felt like it was on fire

Am I in the hospital again?

I heard Sam said, "she's waking up. Everyone get out, please..I need to be alone with my mate."

It got quiet around me and then I heard shuffling of people leaving the room. I was still thinking. I don't know.. How did I end up here again? I know.. I started to get overwhelmed by the memories, so I went to the bathroom to get myself together. Then, somehow it came all at once. I knew..I fell in the ground. After that, this is where my memories get hazy. I did remember there were people around me calling for my name. I finally snapped out whatever..that was..it didn't felt like a normal panic attack..it felt like I was reliving so many memories at once..it got too much.. …but whatever that was, I remember that I recognized Sam before passing out.

Sigh. This is not the time to get a mental breakdown. Sam has a funeral to attend to, and now he has to worry about me, I thought bitterly. I want to cry in anger, to be honest. I feel so frustrated with myself. Why did I have to break down like that? Why I couldn't just..be normal for one day?

Then, I felt someone hands on my face. I recognized immediately that it was from his warm, calloused hands. I didn't realize I was crying because I felt him wiping my tears from my eyes.

He asked with a very tired tone, "hon?"

I decided to finally open my eyes. I felt my eyes were severely swollen from the amount of crying that I did earlier. My eyes were very dry. I had to blink couple of times to figure what I was looking at and then I saw how Sam looked. He looked rugged. His hair was a mess from running through it multiples times. When I saw his chest, I was horrified from what I saw. There were light pink rashes that looked he had multiple scratch marks across his barred chest..and a bite mark close to his shoulder blade.

T-that was all me?

I was horrified of what I was looking at. I felt Sam nudging my face to look at him instead of his body. With gold eyes, he said sternly, "don't look at them. Look at me."

I gulped nervously, but tears starting to fall more down on my cheeks. I croaked, "I'm so sorry, Sam. I-I.."

His eyes softened, and he said lowly, "I know. I know.. it's not your fault."

I twist my neck around to get better look of my surrounding, and I noticed that I was in an infirmary? It was small with a small table next to me. A computer and a white table close to the door. It was only me and Sam in the room. He saw my confused expression, so he answered my thought, "I took you here in the nurse office that's inside the recreation center. You passed out for almost an hour.."

I asked, "what about the funeral?"

Sam's jaw clenched and he turned his eyes away from me. I knew..he was in turmoil with what to do. I can tell that he was contemplating whether to go to the funeral or be by his mate's side. I didn't want Sam to fight with his wolf side to find closure for his human side, so I said, "Sam..You need to go."

Sam's hands clenched into fists. He said sharply in a strained tone, "No, I can't leave you here alone.."

Even though he said it in a strained tone, his eyes were giving off a different measure. His eyes were flickering from his normal eye color to gold. He's trying to reason himself of why he shouldn't go..He needs to go, or else he will regret it. Or maybe he won't regret it due to imprinting, but nevertheless, everyone deserves closure.

"You can go, Alpha. I be here with your mate. I have some experience when it comes to sickness of the mind."

Sam turned to look whoever said it and I looked over him as well. It was Old Quil. He was by the door with a cane. He was wearing dark traditional clothes to go along with the funeral. He had multiple necklaces around his neck and his hair was pulled back in a low bun instead of a braid like last time. He looked very calm as he waited for Sam to reply back.

Sam finally said thickly with a small nod , "thank you."

Old Quil gave a small smile and nod back to Sam. Sam turned around to give me a quick kiss on lips and he caressed my face. He said with tears in his eyes, "I be back."

I replied softly, "kay."

Sam left the room, leaving me and Old Quil in the room. Old Quil closed the door behind him, pulled a chair to sit close to me by the bed. Once he sat down and saw the bandages, he gave a long, deep sigh. I turned my head away from him in shame. I didn't want to face him. I felt my throat getting tight, trying not to cry again. My lips were trembling because I knew..he was going to ask and I wasn't sure if I was ready to tell him what happened..

What if it all comes back to me again? I don't want to go through it again.

Old Quil finally said, "you don't need to tell me what happened. I heard from Sam and witnesses."

I remained silent.

He continued, " Alegria..She left this life with unresolved feelings and conflicts, so as someone who is using her body, you had to experience at first hand of her memories.."

I asked hesitantly, "..am I going to keep experiencing…this..for the rest of my life?"

Old Quil responded slowly, "depending on the severity of her unresolved feelings and conflicts, you might experience these episodes during the first few years in her body until you're fully integrated to this life."

Fuck. I started sobbing bitterly. Even though I couldn't produce any more tears, I just felt emotionally exhausted. I felt Old Quil's hand patting me gently on the arm.

He said softly, "you'll be able to overcome this, child. I know you can."

I continued to sob for myself until I felt like I mourned enough. I sighed again, and he asked, "do you want a glass of water?"

I finally turned my head around and nodded lightly. He helped me get up from the bed. He personally fed me the water. I drank all of it, and he put it back on the table next to the bed. The water helped my throat to not feel as sore and scratchy. I was able to get a better look at my gloves. I looked at it attentively and slowly took them off.

My eyes widened when I saw the bandages around my finger tips. There were faint drops of blood bleeding through the bandages, and it clicked to me. I scratched..Sam's chest until my fingers started to bleed. I was reminded of the time that Bella punched Jacob in the face. Their skin is very tough, so I suffered more damages than he did. No wonder my jaw feels sore. I probably bite as hard as I could without realizing it.

Damn.

Old Quil murmured, "Sue patched you up before she head out to start the funeral..but, from how unfazed you look, this isn't the first time it happened, hasn't it?"

I gulped thickly, "y-yes..In..my old life, I had mental breakdowns from stress and severe depression that led me to harm myself to find a release from my panic attacks..it hasn't happened for a long time..usually, I can see the signs where it is going to happen and I am able to prevent it from escalating, but this time..I..just couldn't.."

Old Quil hummed, "you weren't prepared because her memories came suddenly to you."

I said lightly, "..yeah."

He nodded. He was about to say something else when we heard a loud screech from the distance. With furrowed eyebrows, we turned to look at the window to see what it was. It was drizzling outside. It was like even the sky was mourning with us for this depressing today. Nevertheless, there was a car that swerved over the edge of the sidewalk. When I looked to see who was coming out of the car, my eyes widened in realization.

It was Leah Clearwater.

Author's Note:

I know. I was gone for a month. With the holidays coming, I got busy with life. I haven't abandoned this story, so as a Christmas gift to you guys, I decided to send this chapter. Enjoy!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!