.
Larceny
theft of personal property.
Only a fool would touch Erza's cake. Only a suicidal fool would dare steal it right before her birthday. The hunt is on.
"Where is it?" Erza demanded. It was the day before her birthday, and she did not have the patience for nonsense.
She had stopped at the bakery on the way to the guild and picked up a pre-birthday cake to snack on today, but she hadn't managed even a bite of it. Mira had accosted her the moment she walked in, dragging her back to the kitchens to sample possible food options for tomorrow's party. Erza had humored Mira for maybe twenty minutes, and someone had apparently decided to take advantage of it.
"Where's what?" Natsu asked between huge mouthfuls of breakfast. Lucy wrinkled her nose at him.
"My cake," Erza said.
A hush fell over the guild, and every head swiveled toward the empty table where Erza had left an entire strawberry cake merely twenty minutes before.
Gajeel said something very crude and retreated to the corner, outside of the danger zone.
"Who would be dumb enough to steal Erza's cake?" Cana asked with a cackle.
Erza glared at her. She shut up.
"Um…" Lucy looked around helplessly. "It was right there…"
"And now it's not." Erza crossed her arms over her chest and broadened her glare to encompass the entire guild. "Who took it?"
No one volunteered.
"Maybe someone snuck in and swiped it?" Happy ventured. "Like just a common thief?"
Erza threw him a withering look. "Some random civilian snuck into a guild full of mages to steal a cake?"
"Well…"
"Someone must have seen something."
"Sorry," Lucy said regretfully. "We weren't over there. You left it way back in the corner, and we've been over here the whole time."
No one else had seen anything either, or would admit to it. Someone was lying.
"Who is missing?" Erza asked, scanning the guild to see who wasn't here—and might have snuck off with her cake.
"Bisca and Alzack," Natsu said promptly. "But they're on a job, I think. And Laxus and the Raijinshuu, but they always kind of do their own thing. And Gildarts, but he's always–"
"Never mind," Erza growled. "Help me find it." The team exchanged uncertain glances, and she barked, "Everyone!"
Suddenly, the entire guild was on its feet, searching every nook and cranny.
"The backroom is clear!" Levy called.
"So is the kitchen!" Mira said, as if she and Erza hadn't been back there the whole time.
"As if the thing grew legs and walked under the table to play with the rats," Gray muttered under his breath as he crawled under the tables and checked the corners. Erza kicked him in the ribs when he next emerged and elicited a pleasing yelp.
Erza surveyed the room with mounting frustration. They had turned the place over top to bottom, and there was no sign of her cake.
"Over here!" Lucy said.
Erza was by her side in an instant. "Did you find it?"
"Well… No, but look." She pointed to a smear of pink on the floor just inside the doorway.
Erza gasped, scandalized. "Someone is destroying my cake!"
"You sure it's from your cake?" Gajeel asked.
"Sure looks like it, but I can check." She leaned over to swipe her finger in the pink glob, but drew up short when Lucy squealed.
"Erza! You can't eat that!"
"Whyever not?"
"It's on the ground."
Erza considered this. "Five-second rule?"
"One, that has been there way longer than five seconds. And two, that's disgusting. This is a guild of barbarians. Who knows what's on that floor."
Erza had to admit that the second point made a convincing argument. "Fine. Do you think this means someone took it out of the guild after all?"
"Probably," Gray said, pointing at another swathe of pink smeared along the doorframe. "There's no sign of it in here, anyway."
"That thing is long gone by now," Gajeel said.
Erza would not be deterred. "Let's track down our thief. Team, you're with me."
No one dared protest as she ushered Lucy and the boys out the door. Happy flew up high to observe the street and look for any sign of suspicious activity. Natsu sniffed around and quickly found another pink blob further down the sidewalk.
"Can't you smell who it is?" Erza asked impatiently.
"Nah," he said. "The sugar smell overpowers everything, and the scent is muddied since there are so many people around. But the icing smell is strong. I should be able to follow that."
"What did they do to my poor cake?" Erza wondered as she followed Natsu down the street. "It's like it's melting everywhere."
No one seemed to know. Natsu followed the icing trail down another street and then out into the park and down towards the river. Every few hundred yards, a pink blob spattered the grass.
"There!" Lucy cried, pointing.
Erza tore her eyes from the ground, where she was searching for more icing, and followed Lucy's finger. Her mouth dropped open. Spread out along the riverbank ahead of them was a blanket. Sitting right in the middle, beside a wicker basket, was her cake.
"My cake!" she cried, rushing forward. "What in the world…?"
"Surprise!" her friends cheered in unison, making her start in surprise.
She frowned back at them. "What…?"
"Happy almost birthday!" Happy said.
Lucy smiled sheepishly. "You said a while back that you'd never had a picnic and wanted to have one someday, so we thought it could be an early birthday present."
"The cake was a last-minute addition when you came into the guild with it," Gray muttered. "For the record, it was not my idea. I thought you'd murder us."
Erza stared at them. "I still might. How did you even…?"
"We swiped it while you were in with Mira and brought it down here," Happy said, looking much too pleased with himself.
"But the icing…"
"We stole some from the batch Mira made for your cake tomorrow," Natsu said. "Your cake is fine."
They stared at her expectantly.
"Well… I guess I did want to try having a picnic…"
They beamed and crowded around to sit on the blanket, pulling Erza down with them.
"I made lots of food!" Lucy said, digging through the basket. "Don't worry, I didn't let the boys near any of it, so it's perfectly hygienic."
"Good thing no one swiped the basket before we got here," Natsu said cheerfully.
"Or the cake," Happy added in a hushed voice.
Everyone shot Erza nervous looks.
She frowned at them. "You have been very negligent with my cake."
"I told you this was a bad idea," Gray muttered.
"…But the picnic is very nice, so I will forgive you this once. Just don't ever touch my cake again."
They fell over themselves in their hurry to agree.
The picnic turned out to be so nice, in fact, that Erza felt generous enough to cut them each a small slice of pre-birthday cake to celebrate. The next person who touched her cake would be short a few fingers, but luckily for them, it was the day before her birthday and she did not have the patience for such nonsense right now.