Author's Notes: This year has been a ride, but here let me come in and finish part 1 of this story for you (i'm not making a new story for part 2 3, so it'll all be found here, but ya, this is the last chapter for part 1)

Tbh, this chapter is a ride, too. Has a looooot of important revelations. Hang in!

Silhouette

Part 1 - Control

Chapter 20 - Prisons

"You bastard!"

Whis sighed and looked up into the sky just in time to watch Beerus knocking Goku to the ground. The two had been going at it for much longer than Whis had expected, but no matter how much the Saiyan was beaten down, he kept coming back for more. Well, this was the more aggressive, angry side so the insults and taunting actually worked to raise the Saiyan's blood pressure and cajole him into continuing a hopeless battle.

Still, this was getting to be rather tiresome. Even Lord Beerus was reaching his limit. While the God of Destruction certainly enjoyed any excuse to fight and cause such untold destruction around his own planet, everyone had a point where it became a bit boring. Especially when this angry Goku kept repeating the same maneuvers (one really got to see the similarities in attack patterns after half an hour or so).

"Stay down this time!" Lord Beerus shouted, forming a ball of purple energy and throwing it down to where Goku had fallen for the upteenth time. "I'm tired of constantly putting you in your place, Saiyan!"

An explosion rocked the ground and Whis hummed as he floated into the air, narrowing his eyes against the spray of dirt and rocks. He waited for a few moments, watching the dust clear. From this vantage he could see Goku twitch from his place on the ground, and then sit up slowly and cross his legs, rubbing at his head. The Saiyan spat to the side, looked up, and then heaved a sigh and hung his head. Ah. Another switch, then?

Maybe the Goku they all knew finally had control again. So interesting how he flipped like that. Two personalities in one body, fighting for control. Oh yes, quite the fun thing to watch. Though he would like it better if Goku weren't so quick to switch and lose control. Then maybe he could have a conversation with the more responsive side that didn't devolve into an angry death match in the skies of the planet.

Well, maybe this time.

Lord Beerus snorted and dropped in altitude to float beside Whis. "There. He's all yours. I'm taking a nap."

Whis nodded and gave a small smile. "Took longer than I expected."

"Don't give me that," Beerus said as he eyed him and yawned. "I am holding back so I don't kill the idiot, you know."

"Right, right, of course."

Beerus growled but didn't say anything else, being content to make his way toward his castle for a good rest. After how long he spent knocking this Saiyan around, Whis could only imagine how long Lord Beerus might nap this time. No need to let him sleep too long, of course. He could imagine Goku losing control in less than an hour.

Hrm. He would need to do something else to keep the Saiyan held up, then. Whis glanced at his staff and smirked. Oh, the wonders he could do with this little thing. He'd give Goku a prison to keep even that instant transmission of his in check - and something that would give Lord Beerus plenty of time to sleep and be ready for a good fight the next time Whis deemed it appropriate. What a perfect way to keep the both of them occupied.

Flying over to where Goku resided, Whis landed neatly on the ground several feet away from the beaten Saiyan. His shoes practically clicked in time with his tongue as he touched down. Goku's form shifted but he didn't raise his head.

"Hey, Whis," Goku groaned. "How many times is that?"

"Hm. Close to fifty switches in half an hour, I would say."

Goku flinched. "Then I really can't control him at all, and my head is killing me."

"Him?" Whis clicked his tongue between his teeth. "I've told you, Goku. I'm quite sure it's all a part of you; it's something that's lain dormant for all this time."

That got Goku to lift his head at last, bloody bangs crossing in front of his angry eyes. "That guy is not me."

Whis shrugged with a sigh. "Suit yourself, then. You've never seemed the type to deny the truth, though."

"He's not me! He's some terror trapped inside and I -"

"Yes, yes, I know what you believe," Whis waved his hand in the air dramatically. "Whatever the case, there's no doubt you lack control. Which means we have to resort to something else, hmm? Can't keep Lord Beerus up all day, you know."

"R-right…" Goku muttered, deflating once again. "That's the whole reason I'm here, isn't it?"

"I suppose I'd best get to it then, huh?"

Without another word, Whis raised his staff into the air and summoned one of the big see-through cubes he'd used before for transferring great numbers around the universes. This one was special, though. It worked more efficiently as a prison. He summoned it into being so that Goku was now sitting inside of the nearly invisible cube, and then clicked the bottom of his staff on the ground three times to activate the prison features.

He'd added some nice features inside this one, giving Goku a fridge of food and a large private box in a corner for those pesky mortal needs. Other than that, it was pretty empty. Which should suit the Saiyan just fine. He wouldn't need much considering Whis' next assignment for him.

Standing up, Goku looked around at his new prison and frowned toward Whis. "I can't sense anyone's energy from here even if they were to raise their energy levels, right?"

"Of course," Whis said, moving the staff behind his back. "You won't be able to raise your own ki beyond a certain level anyway, especially not enough to teleport to Earth or anywhere, even if you did somehow break through the ki fuzz feature."

Goku raised an eyebrow. "Ki fuzz?"

"The feature keeping you from sensing anyone right now."

"Ah." Goku scratched at his head and then groaned. "He's coming out now."

Whis simply smirked. "I expected it."

Another blink and Goku's statement proved true as his other side flipped into control, eyes immediately dropping into an angry glare. This side caught Whis' gaze but didn't immediately snap anything. Instead, he looked around the cube and tilted his head like the whole thing was some crazy dream. He even walked up to the edge and tapped on it, receiving no response.

"Keh," Goku scoffed. "You think this will hold me?"

"Yes."

Whis made sure to put as much confidence into the word as possible. It would hold. He had no doubt of that. But he wanted to make this side react. It would be interesting to see how he'd respond to what awaited him if he tried what Whis suspected.

Oh, yes, very interesting.

"Fool," Goku growled. "I can break through this easily."

And then he reacted all according to plan. He raised his ki . Hands out to the side, legs spread apart. A great burst of energy and struggle. Oh even a flash of light! Impressive that he almost managed to go into Super Saiyan before the defenses kicked in.

But did they kick in hard .

Electricity swarmed through the cube, bouncing from side to side until it built up a tremendous cloud of buzzing lines. And then it all hit the Saiyan at once, and the scream that came out of that haughty mouth was kind of delicious in its own way. Nice to see the cocky asshole meet the pain of his own ki attacking him at an exponential level.

Right to the nerves, that one. Down to the barest power making his existence a reality. Life energy turning on its own. Smoke filled the cube and Goku fell, unconscious. Well, then. Seemed like he made both of them retreat. Interesting.

A cough challenged his earlier thought and Whis smirked as Goku got to his hands and knees and whimpered. "Ow… What happened? I don't have a headache anymore, but-"

"Your other half tried to break through."

"Oh. Huh. Ouch." Goku groaned as he sat and crossed his legs, hands on his knees. "Damn, I think it'll hold him, then."

"Indeed," Whis hummed, bringing a hand up to his lips. "Now, Goku, before I go, I do have one thing I want you to do for me."

"Huh? What is it?"

Oh, that voice was still so innocent. Amazing that he could manage that after everything that happened. Goku truly was a Saiyan for the history books, for more than one reason. Whis met those black eyes and leaned down to be even closer, right before he whisked himself inside the cube to stand right in front of the Saiyan - who understandably jumped a little in his seat at the move.

"Ah, wait, how did you -?"

"Unimportant," Whis said, waving his hand in the air. "Your focus needs to be on meditating."

"M-meditating?" Goku raised an eyebrow. "How is that going to help anything?"

"Oh trust me, you'll figure out, especially if you can create a little headspace to meet your other half."

"You mean you want me to talk to the demon inside me."

Whis shrugged. "Sure, call it what you want. Do that for me and I'll see you in a few days to see your progress."

"Ah -" Goku licked his lips. "Sure. Okay."

With another wave, Whis reappeared on the outside of the cube, getting Goku to jump again in shock. Well, it always was a good idea to impress the students. Keep them guessing about his own power so they never quit. This might be a different situation, but it could help keep Goku in line to know about what Whis could do.

Because this new development was turning out to be too intriguing to simply let it fester; he had to give them a little push in some way, didn't he?

~!~

Meditating hadn't been difficult for Goku in years, so it took him a few deep breaths to reach the requisite calm state. In no time at all, he felt his mind slipping into the blank space in his head. Peaceful and gentle breezes ruffled across his hair, and when he opened his eyes he found himself in a meadow of tall grass instead of the near invisible cube prison on the planet of the God of Destruction.

Yeah, this was a nice retreat. Whis was right to suggest he meditate. He could calm down and breathe here. Much better than disappearing from reality entirely for however long that other guy took control. Even if that guy decided to step out and cause problems, there was nothing to worry about this time. No one could get hurt anymore. So Goku could take the time to relax his mind and dissect the problem without fear or worry.

After a few moments sitting comfortably amongst the grasses, Goku got to his feet and brushed the grass stains from his now clean and undamaged orange gi. He took a deep breath of the air, relishing the warmth and familiarity. Sure, it was all in his mind, but he could almost consider this the perfect retreat, a home he could return to no matter where he was at the moment. Such a contrast to the turmoil actually going on inside him right now.

"Look at you. Actually managed to stand up. You gonna try to come inside now?"

Goku spun at the voice, looking this way and that until finally landing on a fence in the distance. A wooden fence like the border to someone's house. He took a step toward it and - in dream-like fashion - appeared before an archway connecting two sides of fence that stretched for miles into the meadow on either side.

Blinking several times in astonishment and confusion, he reached out to the poles holding the arch up. A strange tension met him a hand's breadth away from the pole, and it suddenly felt like he was pushing through oil or tar instead of air. Pulling his hand back, he flexed his fingers and flipped his hand over, trying to decipher what had happened. Everything seemed normal now that he wasn't close to the pole, but even trying to step closer made his hair stand on end and his heart race, a harsh feeling that practically pushed him away.

This was his mind, right? What was going on here? Was there actually a place he wasn't allowed to see? In his own mind? What in the world?

"Don't even realize what you're doing, huh? Figures. Kakarot acted the same way about getting out. He's the one that locked himself in, though. Not my doing. I'm just sitting here watching the fireworks."

"Kakarot?" Goku whispered. "How do you know that name? Who are you? Uh - where are you?"

"Up here, dummy."

Listening to the voice, he finally looked up to see a figure resting on top of the red wooden archway. A monkey tail flicked in the air and for a second, Goku's heart stopped as he imagined a random ruthless Saiyan trapped in his mind. Then he saw more of the figure and he relaxed - if only slightly - because the person sitting on top of the archway was a monkey. An actual talking monkey wearing elaborate clothes like from one of Chi-Chi's old picture books that she used to read to the kids.

The tail continued to flick in the air as Goku watched, stunned. The monkey-person-whoever continued to lay back with one arm behind his head, a golden circlet shining from the midst of his hair - er, fur? In his paw, he held a golden fruit. A peach? Wait, wasn't there a story about this? He should have paid more attention to those fairy tales Chi-Chi read to their boys. Is that why this creature was in his mind? Huh. Probably something from his subconscious manifesting as a talking character in his head.

Oh boy…

"I - uh - so who are you?"

"Doesn't matter," the monkey said, taking a bite of the golden peach. "You wanna talk to Kakarot, right? I assume that's why you're here. You two probably need to talk, considering all the running back and forth you've been doing through my gate."

"Uh," Goku blinked, pointing a finger up at him. "How do you know that name? You never said."

"I don't know. Just the name that seems to fit for your body double back in there."

"My what?"

"You know. He keeps taking control and everything. Like I said, you guys keep running past my gate. I guess I could do more to keep things orderly, but that's no fun. And I think you must've hit your head or something because a lot of stuff got messed up in here."

"Uh, yeah, I did, but -" Gosh, he couldn't keep up with all this. "So you're saying I need your permission to get past your gate? I sure hope I don't have to answer any riddles."

The monkey sat up, legs hanging over the side of the arch. Somewhere in that switch of position, the golden peach disappeared, too. In its place there was a thin red pole, which Goku thought looked awfully familiar. Not that he got the chance to really study the thing.

The creature - the gatekeeper of sorts? - shoved the pole toward him and it lengthed in size to where it almost hit Goku in the head. "Yeah. Sure. Riddle me this. What's your name and what's your role exactly anyway?"

"My role? I don't know that one," Goku said, scratching at his head before crossing his arms in thought. "This is my body and my head and my mind and I want control back, that's all. Oh, and my name's Goku."

"Goku. All right, sounds legit, so I'll let you in," the monkey said, standing up on the archway. He waved the pole across the gateway and then sat down again before waving his paw, which had quickly lost the pole and regained a half-eaten peach. "Go on. Figure out your role some other time. Maybe you can talk it out with Kakarot and you'll know."

"Y-yeah, sure, I'll do that."

Though the monkey continued to be an oddity and curiosity and Goku wanted to know more about this other creature that was apparently taking up space in his mind, he had other, more important things to do. He had a good feeling he knew exactly who this Kakarot person was supposed to be. That was his Saiyan name, so whoever had taken control and tried to act more Saiyan or whatever. Obviously. The one he hated and wanted to kick out no matter what.

The quicker he could get rid of Kakarot, the faster he could return home and apologize to everyone. Maybe he could get Chi-Chi to take him back after all the awful things that had happened. He doubted she would, though. Who could take him back after what he'd done? But, well, at the very least he could check on his kids, right?

Of course, this all depended on whether he could get this other guy to leave him alone. Go haunt and torment some other person. Disappear or whatever. He didn't care. He just had to get the guy out of his head.

As he walked away from the fence and the strangely gated archway, the ground at his feet changed from peaceful meadow to a barren wasteland. In fact, it happened a lot faster than he would have expected, but this was in his mind and not a natural occurrence. So he could hop from one to the next in a blink and barely notice. This was a pretty stark difference, though.

The ground didn't look or feel like anything on Earth. Too harsh for that. Too dark. Too dead. Maybe some places had a similarity but he couldn't place why he knew it wasn't based on Earth - it just felt right. Though it didn't look like anything he had seen out in his adventures in space, either. Curious. Who would create a realm in his mind that he couldn't enter unless allowed passage and then be something he'd never visited?

A chill ran down his spine at a thought.

Unless this isn't yours.

He shook the thought away and narrowed his eyes, looking around at the dark wasteland of a realm. Rocks piled up to the sky, covered in sludge that might have given off a terrible smell in the real world. Here, he could ignore such annoyances without an issue.

After walking for what felt like ages, Goku stopped at the edge of a crater, and then stepped back. He gulped and looked over the edge again, staring at the Saiyan space pod in the center of said crater. Now that felt familiar. Why? Shaking his head at the eerie thoughts, Goku slid down toward the pod. Whether he would find a person in the pod or not, he had to check it out. Things felt too -

Something slammed into him from the side and he coughed as he went to the ground and dust flew into the air. No other attack followed so Goku kept himself in control and forced himself to his feet. How could he be so off guard in his own mind? None of this was making sense!

"So you decided to join me here, huh?" The voice was like ice crawling down his back; like hearing a distorted recorded version of his own voice. "Who's in control, then?"

"I am," Goku scowled, narrowing his eyes as he faced his mirror opposite. "I'm meditating, that's all, and I'm here to tell you to leave."

The person in front of him looked exactly like him, except for the eyes. Goku had never seen such a look of hatred on his own face. Of course, he was sure he'd given the look to a few enemies in the past, but he'd never seen it. No wonder Chi-Chi and everyone had been startled if this guy had taken control. In here, the guy wore Saiyan armor and still had a tail, too.

So. Kakarot was an apt name for him after all. An imagined version of what he could have been? He hated to think of it like that. No. He wouldn't. This guy was an intruder, playing some kind of twisted game. No part of him would ever kill Chi-Chi. No way.

Kakarot chuckled for a few beats and then barked out with a full out laugh. "Leave? You want me to leave? That's not gonna happen. This is my body and you're the motherfucker who stole my life from me, so you can get the fuck out and never come back."

"That's not true!" Goku snapped. "You're a recent intruder. So get out before I make you."

"Make me?" Kakarot barked a laugh again. "Oh, that's hilarious. You think you have any power to do that? I can't get rid of you and yet you think you can just push me out like it's easy? I'd almost like to see you try, but what I'd really like to do is bury you somewhere deep in here so you never surface again. Just like you did to me."

"Stop lying. You haven't been here for very long. You don't know anything about my life and you don't deserve to front, either."

"Hmmm? You think I'm new, don't you?" Kakarot shook his head, crossing his arms. "I'd pummel some sense into you if I could, but thanks to your little friends on the outside, I can't raise my ki enough to matter. Not even in here, apparently."

Oh. Well. That would explain why Goku couldn't so much as pretend to gather his energy. He was too weak to fight here. Both of them were. No wonder Kakarot wasn't going at him after that first surprise jump.

He wanted nothing more than to fight this guy, though. Spilling all these confusing lies and assumptions. He'd never buried anyone in his mind. That was just crazy talk. This guy was trying to make him lose his sense of reality.

"Look," Kakarot growled, squatting down in the crater. "You know you hit your head as a baby, right?"

"That's not -"

"It is relevant, asshole. Just shut up and listen to my side of the story, would you?" Kakarot spat to the side, then continued when Goku swallowed his protests. "It's more like I hit my head, really, and then you showed up and kicked me out. So excuse me if I'm pissed that I had to fight so much to get back in control of my own life ."

Goku felt like something was stuck in his throat. He wouldn't believe this. He couldn't believe this. He refused. He didn't want to listen anymore. He wanted to erase this guy from his mind. It should be his mind. His meditation. He should have control.

So why couldn't he just snap his fingers and make him go away now that they were here like this? Why?

"See, I got control when you turned into an Oozaru once. Smashed that old man to bits because he's the reason I hit my head. He fucking deserved it."

"Wait," Goku breathed. "What?"

Kakarot smirked, eyes practically glowing in glee. "Oh, that gets you upset, doesn't it? I laughed my ass off about that one for years. You thought it was some strange monster - and then you thought it was you - when all along it was me. Hah! That's not all, either. You know how you lose sense of what happens to you when you turn Super Saiyan?"

Ice. Down his veins. Through his blood. He wouldn't hear this. His throat was dry. He couldn't. This couldn't - no - no, no, no, no!

"That was me getting past the gate again. All that rage really helped fuel my escape, and I'll admit, it was fun and addicting as hell to control so much power."

"That's a lie," Goku protested. Why did his voice sound like a whine? "That's all a lie."

"Really? I think even you realized it was happening the first time. Remember what you told your son?" Kakarot smirked and licked his lips. "Something like 'leave before I lose what little control I still have,' right? And then, the best part! You barely remember that fight against Freeza from that point on, don't you? It's mostly blank, isn't it? I wonder why that is…"

Goku fell to his hands and knees in the dirt, feeling like the whole world was shaking. He was just so dizzy. He couldn't believe it. He couldn't - he couldn't breathe.

Kakarot walked over to him, tail flicking in the air, standing over him, eyes dark and full of hatred. "So, yeah, go ahead and try to get rid of me. I'm the original so I doubt that'll go over well for you. Good luck, though. It'll be fun to mess with you while you try."

THE END OF PART 1: CONTROL