The Twelve Gifts of Christmas

With Castle out of commission due to an injury, Kate decides to do something extra special for him. It is, after all, the holiday season. Set Mid-Season 4

Entry for #CastleFicathonWinter2021

One

Standing in the small alcove that functioned as a kitchen in her friend's apartment, Kate Beckett reached out for the top plate from the pile stacked beside her. With her hip bones nearly flush against the counter she held her elbows out wide as she rinsed the dish under the running tap. Then, with the tap off, she squirted soap on the plate and rubbed that around with her hands. This certainly was one of the more awkward ways she had washed dishes as of late, but with the kitchen space at a minimum and no dishwasher available, she had few other options.

She felt someone squeeze in behind her and pile a few more used dishes on the petite counter space to her right. The man, one of Lanie's coworkers from the morgue, muttered a thank you before squeezing out towards the main room, his rear brushing against hers in a move Kate wasn't a hundred percent sure was due to the tight space, particularly since she'd caught him staring at her several times during dinner, but that didn't matter now; the night had come to a close.

"Oh, girl, you don't have to do that."

Kate turned towards her friend, who had used an almost chastising tone, but the detective merely shrugged in response. "I don't mind; it's the least I can do."

When Lanie first invited Kate to the "friendsgiving" meal she was having on the Tuesday before the standard holiday, Kate was hesitant to accept. In the past she had occasionally spent time with Lanie's friend group and, to be entirely honest, there were some people in that group she did not particularly enjoy spending a lot of time around. Besides that, she wasn't sure of what her work schedule would be, so she told her friend she would try to come. The following day Lanie sweetened the deal by saying that, if she chose to come, Kate didn't have to bring anything significant to the pot-luck event; she could just bring some chips and dip or a six pack of beer—whatever was easier for her to pick up.

After taking a few days to think about it, Kate decided to go to Lanie's party. In the wake of her near death experienced earlier that year, she had promised herself to be more open to social events. Though she had known for many years that her workaholic-like tendencies were not the healthiest choices she could make, the bullet to her chest really had pushed her over the edge into accepting that she if she wanted to make changes, now was the time to do them, because life was fleeting; she could never know when her opportunities to change would run out entirely.

Though Kate had grand intentions to be early to the party and come with more substantial food than a bag of chips, she got caught up in a case and thus didn't leave the precinct until about five minutes before the meal was to begin. She texted an apology to Lanie, who was understanding; she even discouraged Kate from picking up any food on her way over so that she could save time. Thanks to getting lucky with the subway trains, Kate arrived in plenty of time to share a meal with Lanie's friends and coworkers, but the guilt over not providing any food was what drove her to begin the dishes as the party was breaking up; at least she could contribute in that way.

"I don't mind; you did so much work for the party already."

Lanie laughed slightly and tipped the remnants of her wine glass into her mouth. "You act like I cooked all this myself."

"Well, you organized it all so I don't mind helping with this." Lanie had set up chairs and foldable tables in practically every available space in her apartment and had also provided the main course of three different flavors of chicken wings. Evidently, she decided not to get a turkey due to the fact that many of the attendees would be getting a traditional Thanksgiving meal in two days' time. Though Kate did find it a bit unusual to be eating chicken wings with mashed potatoes and green bean casserole, everything still tasted excellent, so she had no complains.

"I appreciate it." Lanie told her with a smile. She then went to the main table, grabbed two of the serving platters, now empty of their wings, and brought them to the counter. She shifted the plates around and managed to make them fit, but then told Kate with a laugh, "Every time I do a big meal like this I forget that I have to wash everything in shifts because my kitchen is so damn small."

Kate nodded. "Mine isn't much bigger than yours so I'd have the same problem."

For the next few minutes, they were quiet as Kate finished up the dishes she could before she ran out of space on the dish rack, and Lanie walked around her apartment with a trash bag, collecting all the crumpled up napkins and abandoned plastic cups of drinks that she could. Back in the kitchen, she gave Kate's arm a squeeze and said, "I'm really glad you could come tonight."

With the shrug of one shoulder, she said, "I said I would."

Lanie gave her a look that said, "Yeah, and we both know in the past you would have canceled," though she said nothing for several seconds. "You just seemed kind of off in the last week, so I wasn't sure."

"Oh really?" Kate responded. She turned her lips into a frown and then twitched her head to the side in a confused manner, as she didn't think she had seemed particularly different in the prior few days. "I guess I've just been extra busy with work stuff."

"Well, your team isn't at full capacity," Lanie said pointedly.

Kate fought the strong urge to roll her eyes. So that's why Lanie thought she was "off". How ridiculous! "Ryan, Espo, and I can solve murders without Castle, you know."

"Of course you can," Lanie said in a tone that edged on patronizing. "How's he doing, by the way?"

A light laugh escaped her lips. "Oh…being a bit of a baby."

"So…same as usual."

With a smirk Kate agreed. "Pretty much. I keep reminding him that he should be grateful he doesn't need surgery, but right now he's too annoyed that he has to stay on the couch as much as possible."

"And here I thought he'd love that."

Kate nodded, having had similar thoughts.

Ten days prior, Castle had tripped when stepping off a curb as they left a crime scene. From her position about ten feet behind him, Kate did not think the stumble looked like anything too serious, but when Castle had tried to take another few steps, his knee collapsed out from under him, and he yelped out in pain. She had rushed to him and helped him into the car, insisting that he needed a doctor. Naturally, he said he was fine, and he just needed to put some ice on his knee. She didn't argue with him at that moment, but when they arrived at his apartment building, and he was unable to walk inside she forced him back into her car so she could drive him to the ER.

The ER doctors directed the writer to a specialist, who informed him that he, fortunately, did not need surgery because none of the tendons or ligaments in his knee were torn. They were, however, very strained, and needed several weeks' rest to heal. Thus, Castle was couch-bound and required to use a knee brace and crutches for the limited walking he needed to do.

"He says he misses coming to work."

"And do you miss him coming to work?"

Kate twisted her lips to the side, considering. "Well, my desk is staying a lot more organized with him gone."

"Kate," Lanie said, her tone serious.

"What?"

"How long are you going to keep doing this?"

"Doing what?" Kate responded, genuinely unsure what her friend was getting at.

Lanie pointed the index finger of her right hand towards the ceiling and twirled it around. "Circling until you run out of fuel."

Kate blinked at her. "I don't know what that means?"

Lanie threw her right arm out to the side in a gesture of obvious frustration. "You and Castle are circling when everyone knows you should just land… in bed."

The detective felt her entire body flush. "Lanie!"

With an expression that indicated butter would not melt in her mouth, Lanie shrugged. "Everyone knows you're crazy about him."

"Wha…I…"

"You are," Lanie continued, ignoring her friend's stammering, "just like he's crazy about you."

Feeling her heart rate speed, Kate huffed out a breath and then turned back to the dishes as though they were the most fascinating thing she had ever encountered. She took a few slow, deep breaths as she rearranged the plates, trying to calm herself enough to respond in an even tone, though she was not entirely sure how to respond. None of her friends had called her out so directly about her behavior before, which had led her to believe she was doing a pretty good job at hiding her true feelings. If, as Lanie indicated, everyone knew she was crazy about Castle, she hadn't been doing a good job of hiding those feelings at all. And that was very frustrating especially since she was still trying to work out exactly what those feelings were! Still focusing on the plates, she mumbled out, "It's…it's not that simple. I'm-"

"I know, you have issues you're working through, and I applaud you for your efforts. I also know that these things take time, but Kate…does Castle know that? Does he know you're going to therapy? Because I think he'd be very supportive of it and I think…well, it might help him not get tired of waiting."

Turning back to face her friend, she asked tentatively, "You think that could happen?"

Lanie shrugged. "All I know is holding patterns are never good. Maybe…maybe you should use this separation as an opportunity to see how you really feel about being without him."

Shoving her hands into her back jeans' pockets, Kate confessed, "Well, I am kind of miserable." Her first day without Castle showing up at the office felt quite freeing. She knew she could place all her paperwork and folders around her desk without the risk of someone barging in and rearranging everything—or, worse, knocking it on the floor due to his exuberance. Of course, that attitude only lasted until after lunch. When she returned to her desk, the stark emptiness of the chair beside it almost felt alarming to her. Castle had taken a break from showing her before, several times in fact, but he only ever stayed away for a few days at a time. Knowing that he needed to rest for at least a month (possibly longer!)…well, that slowly began to eat away at her over the coming days.

She missed him, more than she would ever admit, and more than she ever even realized. She'd missed him during all their extended separations—like the summer he took his ex-wife to the Hamptons, and even earlier that year while she was recovering from her shooting—but this time felt different. During those prior times she was stuck in her old ways of pretending that she didn't care and having such a stiff upper lip about her feelings she found it challenging to even smile. Now, she had been working on herself—working towards a place where she and Castle might have been able to become more. She truly felt that she had made progress and, yes, of course she wanted Castle to rest for as long as he needed to heal and recover, but she still missed him. More than ever.

Lanie let out a bark of laughter that sounded like a triumph. "See! There's your answer!"

"But I…I can't just…I can't just ask him out!" She sputtered, the notion alone causing a cold sweat to break out across her forehead.

"Why not?"

"Well…What—what if he says no…" She had pictured that scenario many times in her mind's eye when she was feeling particularly masochistic. She envisioned the writer being kind, but firm, assuring her that he found her invite flattering, but he just wasn't interested in her that way. Each time she pictured it she felt as though an invisible knife in her gut plunged a little bit deeper.

"Kate!" Her name exploded from Lanie's lips in a tone that made it clear the ME found her to be mad. Though Kate liked to beat herself up with that scenario – and use it as justification for why she hadn't invited him out yet – rationally she knew it to be highly improbable.

Opting for a more realistic scenario, Kate continued, "Okay, but what if we have a bad time?"

Lanie shrugged one shoulder. "Unlikely, but…at least then you'd know. Listen, it's a holiday weekend so why don't you just... take some time and give it some thought. Oh! Maybe you could even send him something to cheer him up! He loves Christmas, right? Send carolers to his door and have that be a first step. Just…do something, okay? I don't want you to miss this opportunity because you really deserve it."

When her friend squeezed her shoulder warmly, Kate smiled. "Thanks, Lanie."

Deep down, Kate knew that Lanie was right. She absolutely did not want to miss any opportunities with Castle, because the more their relationship developed, the rarer and more special it seemed. Still, it was not in her nature to simply dive into things of the romantic nature without intense thought and consideration, and that was exactly what she needed to do over the next few days. Hopefully, then, an idea would come to her.

Seated at her desk, slightly slumped in her chair, her head lolling back against the headrest, Kate lazily moved her mouse to the right so her cursor could hover over her email inbox. She clicked and saw that it was still empty. Letting out a long exhale, she let her hand drop off the mouse, and she shut her eyes.

At five a.m. that morning as some women were getting ready to put their brined and seasoned turkeys in the oven to roast, Kate was yawning her way through her first cup of coffee while riding the subway to her precinct. Despite the early shift, Kate remained satisfied with her choice to work a double shift on Thanksgiving so that those with children could be at home with their families. It was her Thanksgiving and Christmas tradition (and, quite frankly, she had no confidence in her ability to cook a twelve-pound bird while making sure the inside was no longer raw at the same time as the outside wasn't burnt to a crisp). Maybe some year that tradition would change, but for that year she'd stick to her standard plans.

As per usual, the day was very quiet. Most of the precincts dedicated their extra staff to the Macy's parade, which left a skeleton crew inside the Twelfth. On Kate's floor there was only one other person working: McDougal from the robbery division. He was newer and she didn't know him that well, but as per protocol if he got a call for a major incident, she would assist, just as he would assist her in the case of a major homicide. Though robberies on Thanksgiving did happen due to the high volume of stock the stores had for the Black Friday sales, her precinct didn't have too many major retail stores so it was unlikely they would take a call.

Though she appreciated helping out her fellow coworkers by taking shifts so they didn't have to, Kate found herself forgetting each year just how boring the day could be. By mid-day she had cleaned up her email inbox as best she could on her own; for the rest she needed one of her coworkers, or responses from people in other departments who were off for the holiday. She'd also organized most of the files she had stored across her desk, but there weren't too many of those either since she didn't have any active cases to solve or court appearances in the near future.

Just as Kate thought she might drift off to sleep thanks to her four fifteen a.m. alarm, her phone chimed with an incoming text message. Overly excited from any form of communication that day, she snatched up her phone eagerly and unlocked the screen. Happy Turkey Day, read the message from her partner.

A smile on her face, she replied with, Happy Thanksgiving to you, too. Is your bird in the oven?

No, we're getting the meal catered this year since food poisoning from Mother's cooking wouldn't make anyone very thankful this year

For five seconds, Kate felt confused about his message. Then, when the realization hit her, her chest constricted with sadness, for this was yet another challenge the writer faced in the wake of his knee injury.

Kate knew that Castle loved to cook for his family's holiday meals. He genuinely enjoyed creating dishes for everything to share and the way that cooking and baking added to the holiday experience as a whole. Though Kate was far from a talented chef, she was aware of how much standing and moving around the kitchen it took to make even a small meal, and with Castle's standing time restricted to only the time it took him to complete basic needs, he simply was not able to complete the task that year. She knew that Castle liked to joke about the times his mother's cooking gave them food poisoning, or was simply inedible, Kate also knew that Martha could make a meal when she wanted, but also understood how a full Thanksgiving dinner would be too daunting for her, even with Alexis's help.

Given that the writer was not one to spare expenses, she was sure their catered meal would be quite lavish—probably even more so than the writer could create himself—but she also knew he would feel sad for not creating the meal himself.

Well at least no one has to do the dishes :), she messaged back, hoping that he would at least get a small smile out of it. And I'm sure you will all have a great day together.

Thanks, Beckett. Hope you enjoy the holiday yourself. Seeing your dad this weekend?

Yeah, on Sunday.

Well, I'll leave you to your work, then. Talk to you soon.

She replied with a smile emoji and then placed her phone back on her desk as the wheels in her brain began to turn with thoughts. She had been thinking about doing something for Castle ever since her conversation with Lanie a few days prior, but she felt too paralyzed with indecision to actually act on a plan. She had told herself she was going to get through the holiday weekend and then decide, but now after learning about yet another disappointment Castle was facing, Kate had renewed resolve.

Sliding her chair further in towards her desk, she sat up straight and opened a browser window so she could search for carolers for hire in the New York City area. She clicked, searched, clicked, and searched some more for the better part of ten minutes before she huffed out a breath of annoyance and tapped her fingers loudly against the desk. Though she found several groups of carolers that one could hire to sing at someone's home or at a holiday party, the earliest she could find an available booking date was December 10th, which was two weeks away! She understood the holiday season was now underway and these groups were probably booked up weeks in advance, but she had been hoping for something to send Castle immediately, or at most, within a few days.

Grumbling to herself, Kate continued to search for different ideas, but after another half hour she didn't find much more success. Deciding to take a break, she navigated towards a news page with live shots of the parade downtown, figuring she'd watch that for a few minutes. As she did so, a banner ad on the side of the web page caught her eye.

Since she had been searching for so many Christmas-themed things, the ads she was receiving at the top and sides of web pages were similarly themed, which wasn't surprising. The one that caught her eye displayed several photos of what looked like Christmas tree ornaments. Her brow wrinkled at the sight of a Santa with a haunted smile, an elf with a crooked eye, and a tree with a black bird sitting on a branch.

"Yikes," she muttered under her breath. Clearly, these ornaments were discounted for a reason.

She was about to click away from the ad, when suddenly an idea hit her. Whether or not it was the seller's intention, the bird in a tree reminded Kate of the Twelve Days of Christmas song, specifically the partridge in a pear tree. Instead of a partridge, however, this bird looked more like a crow or a raven. The latter bird made her think of Edgar Allen Poe—the 1800's writer that her partner loved so much that he actually made "Edgar" his middle name when he'd changed it at the beginning of his writing career.

Kate clicked on the ad, curious if the black bird in the tree was actually available to purchase, and when she found that it was, an idea began to form in her mind.

What if instead of just one thoughtful Christmas gift, she gave him twelve? Perhaps not the exact version of gifts that were in the song (that was, after all, a heck of a lot of birds), but variations of them. She could try and keep to the theme of what the song's verse was about, but make sure the gift was more suited to his personality. And! Better yet! She could send the gifts to him by messenger but make the sender anonymous. That would be like giving him a mystery to solve, too!

Quite pleased with her idea, Kate quickly checked her work email in box to confirm it was still void of new messages, then returned to the web browser and added the black bird tree ornament to her cart. Now, she only had to find eleven more gifts to fit in with her plan, but that was okay; she was only halfway through her shift, which gave her plenty of time to think—and plan!

A/N: thank you for reading - I hope you're excited for this Christmas Journey :)