Thanks to all our readers and our team for keeping the Christmas magic alive.
Chapter 20: A Christmas Miracle
December 19, Sunday
New York, New York
Rosalie
"And then she walked in wearing his shirt, and all of us were like, 'Oh, shit. What do we do?', you know?"
I really, really don't know.
I want to know; I really do. My assistant, Heidi, who has only been kind and loyal to me since the day I hired her, laughs around a tall mimosa as we sit at a small cafe on Sunday morning. She's been regaling me with stories of her late-night and apparently, early morning adventures, inadvertently reminding me how old I am and how removed I am from the traps of the dating world. She laughs as she recounts the latest adventure of online dating, a story in which her friend came out of her bedroom last night wearing the shirt of another friend's boyfriend, and I gift her a polite smile around my own glass but remain silent.
There's not much I can say, really. I've been with Emmett for so long I can barely remember what it feels like to go on dates or meet new people. I've grown so accustomed to finding the safety in his arms that the thought of putting myself back into the dating pool makes me laugh out loud.
"It's funny, right?" Heidi agrees at the sound of my laugh. I let her believe I'm laughing at her stories, and maybe I am a little.
Or perhaps I'm laughing at how ridiculous it is that I've pushed my husband away for the last year, and now that he's gone, all I want is for him to be back. All I want is to walk in the door and hear his music from the kitchen as he cooks. Smell his cologne as he walks by. Feel his body next to mine as we sleep.
Am I too late?
I didn't think I would feel his absence as quickly as I did, but now it makes me voluntarily act on it. I find myself reaching for the phone to talk to him about anything and nothing, whereas a few days ago, I cringed at the thought of being in the same room as him. One look at him and his big heart were all it took to be reminded of just how much I let him down when I lost our baby.
We can try again, he had said with his arm around me as I cried myself to sleep one night last year, his own tears mixing with mine.
But my heart couldn't do it then, and I'm still not sure if I'm ready now. But I do know that Emmett being so far away has me completely off my guard.
Hell, I even agreed to meet up with Heidi on a Sunday morning. What does this say about me?
I don't answer my own question but instead, pull out my phone and send a text to Emmett.
I've agreed to go to brunch with Heidi this morning. Tell me why I thought this was a good idea.
He answers me back quickly, just like he always has. Did she drug you before you left the apartment?
Knowing her? Probably. What are you up to?
Working on Bella's truck. They all say hi, by the way. They all miss you.
I stew over a response, debating on telling him I'm missing more than I realized. But he sends another message first, and it makes me drone out the beginning of another one of Heidi's stories. My eyes fill with the emotion I've been ignoring as I read his text.
But I think I miss you the most.
We're missing them both! Get over there, Rose!
Tomorrow, enjoy the chapter with a memory of a time when you FINALLY found what you were looking for!