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Cast: Young Phoebe Donovan - Skai Jackson

Disclaimer: I don't own TVD.

Ch. 4 - '94 And '95

I knew 1994 was gonna be an eventful year when I saw Stefan Salvatore snacking on bunnies in the woods one morning. Right. It was already May and the world was about to go to hell.

After waking up at dawn, I went into the woods near my house to pray to the goddess Hekate and practice my magic. I had discovered a small tunnel by the river several months ago and decided to turn it into my hideout. I kept candles and herbs in the tunnel along with a small shrine I created. I used magic to carve a small stone statue of the goddess from memory. It was the same as when I saw her sitting on the moon disc throne with her dog by her side. I placed keys around the statue to symbolize the crossroads, decayed animal bones to symbolize her authority over the dead, a pentagram to symbolize status as the goddess of witchcraft, and the full moon flanked by two crescent moons to represent her dominion over the night sky and the moon.

Surrounded by the trees and the water, magic flowed easily in and out of my body. I closed my eyes and sat before the shrine. "Ignis incendium." I smelled the scent of the candles waft around the cave as they ignited simultaneously. Like every day before, I fell into a trance as I meditated, channeling all the magic from my surroundings.

I passed my hand over the flames, extinguishing all the candles before getting up to leave the tunnel. Over the past months, I had mastered the fire spell and levitation spell.

Chants are like mnemonic devices that make it easier to remember the actions caused by magic. They're less about direct translation and more about intention and visualization. Since chants can be in many languages -Latin, French, and Creole- to cast a spell, why can't they be in English, or even backward speak like Zatanna? Using keywords that correspond with an image in the subconscious. Magic and spells are just an association game. Magic is the energy, the chant is the method, and the spell is the result.

"Etativel." I raised a leaf from the ground, leaving it to float in front of me.

Yeah, I can talk backward. I watched Young Justice a lot in my previous life and the levitation spell was the spell Zatanna used the most. It's simple. The only problem with English chants is the complicated grammar and syntax. There are so many articles that a spell would have a very long chant to remember. English would be inefficient for spell casting in dire situations.

With constant practice, my proficiency with the spells increased. I levitated all the leaves in the area off the forest floor. I giggled, simply watching, in awe of my own power and the beauty of the forest. I sat down by the flowing spring, letting the leaves fall as I inhaled a breath of clear morning air.

Going out into nature was one of the many past times I had in my previous life. Just watching the leaves fall, listening to the critters, and taking a short walk as the wind swept through my hair. It was the only respite I had when I spent most of my days cooped up inside my house.

In this life, the forest allowed me to get away from everything and everyone. I was cooped up in my house in my previous life and didn't like it. Of course, I would prefer not to do the same in my current life as it wasn't easy with five people living in a small house. I still shared a room with Matt and Ria, who were growing quickly. No matter how much I love them, escaping the rowdy house once a week was my respite from my siblings.

I wiped the leaves and the dirt off my clothes, deciding to return home. Before I took a step, a chill ran down my spine as goosebumps spread over my body. I had never felt it before but I knew what it was. Bonnie -who had yet to come into her powers- felt danger from Stefan. As for me, my senses were more acute with constant use of my powers. I had no need to come into direct contact with a vampire. I could sense them within a certain radius.

My heart thudded in my chest as every muscle in my body was telling me to flee. But where's the fun in that? I turned and walked toward the danger. I was going to meet my first vampire.

I kicked up the leaves, walking loudly, making sure that he would hear me approaching. I didn't want to spook a vampire and lose my head. I forced myself to trip and cried, "Owie." I got back up and walked closer toward the vampire, only to see Stephan Salvatore wiping blood from his lips. I smirked when I saw him with a clearly relieved look on his face. "Hey mister, are you lost?" I asked in the most childish voice I could muster.

"No. Just taking a walk? What about you?" He slowly approached me and bent down in front of me. "It's dangerous to be here by yourself."

"I know these woods like the back of my hand. I would never get lost." He laughed at my reply when I raised my chin up in the air and pouted.

"How about I take you home?" He smiled amusedly at my comment.

"I'll have you know I'm a witch. I have magic so I can protect myself," I said. Nobody ever believed me whenever I said I was a witch. All of them thought it was the fantasy of a child. I was sure Stephan thought the same as I let him take my hand and lead me back toward my house. You'd think a vampire who was used to witches would at least believe that I could be telling the truth. But I was fine with people not believing me which is why I never showed my magic abilities in public. "My name's Phoebe Donovan. What's your name, mister?"

"Stefan Salvatore."

"Oh, cool name. It's alliterative," I said, enunciating every syllable of the last word.

"That's a big word," Stefan said.

"I can read and write. Some people came to my house and told my granny that I was a genius. That means I'm smarter than everyone else."

"Oh, really. I guess you're smarter than me."

"Of course I am."

"Do you go to preschool?"

I scoffed. "No. They can't teach me anything I don't know. It's so boring. I went once and the only thing I liked was nap time. Now, I take a nap every day." I was making myself puke with the annoyingly high-pitched, cute voice I was forcing. I should get an Oscar. "I've never seen you before. Are you new?"

"I'm visiting my uncle."

"Are you gonna leave after?"

"I'm gonna leave soon."

"Are you gonna come back when you leave?"

"I might," he replied.

"Then you have to come see me when you come back." We stopped when my house came into view. I extended my pinky out to Stefan. "Pinky promise?"

He laughed warmly at me before taking my pinky with his. "Pinky promise. I'll come back to see you."

I left him watching as I skipped back to the back door of my house. I returned to my room to quickly get ready for the day. "Emoc ot em." I levitate my teddy to me, hugging it tightly. It may be a bit much to use magic just for a teddy, but I have to practice my magic.

I use magic in my daily life for almost anything and everything. The constant use of magic increases my proficiency with the spell and my control over magic. The only downside is that when I fall asleep, I sleep like the dead as the constant use of magic becomes a strain on my physical body.

"Good morning, granny. Good morning, mom. Good morning, Ria. Good morning, Matt." I passed around the table to kiss my granny and my mom and Ria and Matt.

"Good mornin' Phoebe. D'you have good dreams?"

"Yes, granny." Amy placed a plate of pancakes and fruit in front of me before she started with the morning prayer.

"Kelly, the people from Whitmore are coming to see Phoebe today," Granny Amy informed Kelly, who was feeding Matt.

"Granny, isn't she too young?"

"Kelly, Phoebe is ahead of the kids her age here. There's nothing anyone here can teach her. We can't just keep her home all the time. She needs to go to school."

Kelly sighed. "Phoebe, what do you want to do?" Kelly and granny were some of the few people who didn't act like I was an innocent and naive child. They knew about my maturity. Every decision they made about me, they asked my opinion.

I thought for a moment. I wasn't a big fan of Mystic Falls. Nosy neighbors always complaining about the Donovans letting me wander around by myself. They were judging and condemning Kelly, calling her a bad mother when they don't know anything about us or our family. How dare they?

I didn't want to leave Kelly, Ria, and Matt. Even without the supernatural, this town was a hellhole of prejudice and bigotry. But, I also had goals. If I was at Whitmore, I could more readily save Enzo and stop Augustine, the worst prejudiced bigots of them all. As a declared "genius", I'd also have more freedom to continue studying magic.

In my last life, I wasn't able to experience a normal school experience. I could still live a relatively normal life before everything goes to hell in fifteen years. Sure, a program for young "geniuses" wasn't "normal", but why would I want to be normal when I could be extraordinary?

"Can I talk to the person before deciding?"

"Of course you can," Kelly said. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to."

By midmorning, a person from Whitmore was standing in the middle of our cramped living room. She gave my mom and granny some brochures about the program. She gave me a test to take while she sat at the table, observing me and writing in her notebook.

Being in a child's body, even with advanced knowledge, I still had a short-term attention span. Instead of taking these stupid tests, I really just wanted to practice my magic. I'm sure the lady would write that in her observations, minus all the magic parts. But even then, I could multitask meditating and channeling magic while still focusing on taking the tests.

May 11, 1994

Dear Diary,

Everything went to hell yesterday. Damon Salvatore came to Mystic Falls and didn't last a day before he massacred an entire house of people, including a pregnant woman. Damon was a charismatic character on the show but he was cruel. It was easy to get into the house. I hid in a room and burned sage for a privacy spell. But, I regretted it. I watched all those people die and I did nothing. I wanted to scream, but only silent tears fell from my eyes as I watched him rip into Gail's throat.

Why didn't I do anything? I had the element of surprise. I could burn Damon to a crisp with my fire spell or drag him into the sunlight without his daylight ring. Did I watch those people die because they were extras, cannon fodder, to me?

Even though I could kill him, I didn't want to kill Damon because I knew he was hurting. He was forced to turn to a life of violence because of his brother and that same brother rejected him because of that violence. Stefan rejected him again and he acted out. But, even then, I could have saved Gail and those people and Zach could live a happy life with his girlfriend and daughter.

I feel so conflicted. What am I supposed to do with these memories? Is it right for me to choose who to save and who should die? Should I just use everyone as a means to an end? I don't know what to do. I can't tell anyone about my previous life or my memories or any of these turbulent feelings in my body.

The eclipse was over. As I was leaving, I caught sight of a newspaper on the lawn reporting on the story from P ortland. Kai Parker massacred his siblings the day before and probably ended up in the prison world.

I don't think I will ever forget that day. The day was more than just a flashback on a screen. It will never be an unimportant moment with unimportant people to me.

The nightmares are already coming. Last night, all I could hear was their screams as they died and their restless spirits blaming me. They will stay with me forever.

What should I do? What should I do?

August 19, 1995

Kelly held my hand as we walked through the shopping mall looking for dresses and accessories for the upcoming fall. I got into the program at Whitmore. The program was for intellectually advanced children and teens. I was already five years old but I'll be the youngest child. I would be going to live at the campus so Kelly saved money to take me shopping for the school as well as for presents for Ria's birthday. "My daughter has to look the cutest," she said.

I ran up to a beautiful white ruffled skirt dress. The moment I saw it, I knew what outfit I wanted to make with it. I love bright colors and cute dresses. Pleated, pink, dressy, floral, flowing, pastel, and everything in between."Mommy, I want this one."

"Okay. How about matching shoes?"

"I think my pink and blue sneakers will work and you can do my hair." Kelly was good at doing hair and all the girly stuff I liked. Whenever we went shopping, she asked me what I thought would look good on her and Matt and Ria. "Mommy, you're good at doing hair, why do you work at the Grill instead of the Salon?"

Kelly cocked her head thinking deeply as though she had never thought about it before. "Oh, I never thought of it before." She had been working at the Grill since she first started high school and after ten years, it was almost as though she didn't realize she could be something other than a waitress.

For several years, I had been cultivating Kelly. I tried to get her to do many things until I found what she was good at. I found out she was the best at makeup, hair, and fashion. She especially loved shopping for clothes to dress me, Matt, and Ria up in. She did my hair every morning, making sure to take care of the different hair textures I had compared to Ria's. She was skilled but she lacked confidence in herself.

I already knew the salon had an opening and by placing the seed in Kelly's head, when we pass by the salon, she can just take a job application. I was slowly changing Kelly. Unlike the show, she was already a good mother who took care of her kids whenever she was out of work. She also lessened the amount she drank from her teen years and stopped doing drugs altogether.

We left the shopping mall with a few bags and went to the salon. Kelly took the job application, using my pen to fill it out right then and there. I smiled at her.

I had slowly begun to like Kelly until I loved her. She was my mother but she became so much more than that as she grew stronger. She was happier, more confident, and less self-destructive. Maybe I manipulated her but I felt that she had changed for the better. Maybe if things continued like this, she wouldn't leave in a decade.

Then, a chill ran down my spine as my nerves came alight. I felt everything inside me was screaming, telling me to run and hide from the danger that was behind me. But my body was frozen. This was worse than Stefan or Damon in his murderous rage. My breath hitched as a lump stuck to my throat stopped me from breathing. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.

I finally got enough control of my limbs to turn around to find the source of the danger. I gasped and held my breath when I saw the man. His face. It was the same. Everything around me seemed to fall away when I saw him. Mikael. As he turned around, his piercing blue eyes landed on me. His lips closed in a tight line under his thin mustache as he turned to look around the street. His eyes came back to me, causing me to stumble and fall on my butt. My eyes tracked his body as he walked out of the frame of the window.

I released a breath as my tears finally fell. The initial shock of the encounter washed over me. I turned to see Kelly was on her knees beside me, wiping my dress. I looked at her and wrapped my arms around her neck as I finally cried. I couldn't help myself as I screamed and wailed. I couldn't stop. Kelly thought it was because I fell as she was continuously telling me, "Does it still hurt? It's okay."

I hid my head in her shoulders as a fountain of tears poured out of me. After several minutes of crying, I was finally about to stop long enough to tell Kelly that I didn't want to go home. Mikael surely came to Mystic Falls for Elena. Abby would desiccate him. I was neighbors with both the Bennetts and the Gilberts. I didn't want to go home just to see Mikael down the street.

Kelly brought me to the Mystic Grill where I sat in a booth with the shopping bags, drinking a smoothie while she worked. I was sure my eyes were puffy and red from all the crying.

I don't know why I reacted to the sight of Mikael like that. Just pure fear and dread filled me when I saw him, and absolute relief washed over me when he disappeared. My whole body screamed to get away from him. I don't know why I reacted like that. Maybe it's because I knew the type of man he was. A man who abused his children constantly with the excuse that he was making them stronger. He traumatized those kids for a thousand years.

I had no idea how he knew the doppelganger was in Mystic Falls. The Originals had a "no child" policy. They did not hurt children. It was surely something influenced by the abuse they received from their father.

Mikael the destroyer went by no such rules. Just to keep his bastard son from becoming a hybrid, I knew in my gut he would kill Elena.

I couldn't sleep that night. It was Victoria's birthday and my eyes were puffy and red from the constant crying and lack of sleep. Mikael was the monster in my nightmares. Every shadow, every movement in the night became Mikael.

"Did you have bad dreams last night?"

I simply nodded my head, looking at her in the mirror as she twisted my hair. "Can I put some makeup on?"

"Yeah." She placed a pink barrette in my hair to finish before turning me around to face her. "Phoebe, I know you're smart and very mature for your age. But, you're still a kid. You're my kid. You know when you have bad dreams, you can come to my room and sleep next to me. I'll make the bad dreams go away. Do you understand?"

I nodded. "Yes, mommy."

She wrapped her arms around my shoulders, pulling me into a hug. "Mommy?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you, too, Phoebe."

My emotions were a mess as I took deep breaths to calm myself. I couldn't cry and make my eyes look worse than they already were. I wanted to look pretty for Ria's party. In my overly emotional state, my mouth moved before I realized it. "Promise you'll never leave me."

"I promise."

Compared to my birthday, most of our neighbors and Kelly's friends were invited to Ria's party. The Scooby Gang was there too, all playing together. The only person absent was Abby.

I put a smile on my face for Ria but my emotions still raged inside me. Mikael was still on my mind and the dread still filled my body. Looking around, I knew moments like this would be few and far between in the future. A time when everyone was together and happy and innocent without any worry or sense of danger. I knew danger was coming and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

Damon wouldn't listen to me if I told him Katherine wasn't in the tomb. Klaus has been trying to become a hybrid for a thousand years, he won't stop no matter what I do. He'll definitely come for Elena sooner or later. Then, there's Esther plotting from the Other Side, Silas trying to revive himself, and the Travelers will also come for the doppelgangers. There was just so much to do? How could I do it all on my own?

"Happy birthday, Victoria." I brought Ria and Matt to our room after everyone had gone home for the party. "I have a special present for you."

Her green eyes shimmered as she said, "Really?"

I spread a bag of feathers over the floor. "Ria, do you know what your name means?" Ria shook her head before I continued, "Once upon a time, there was a great empire. The empire always marched to war, so to ensure their victory, they prayed to a goddess. Her name was Victoria."

Her eyes widened as her mouth turned into an "o" shape. "Really? I'm a goddess."

"You were named after a goddess." I took the crown of flowers and placed it on her head. "She also had wings. Would you like to have wings?"

She nodded quickly. "Ria, you know I'm a witch. I can make you wings but you can't tell anyone, okay?"

"Okay," she replied excitedly.

"Promise?" I held my pinky out to her.

"I promise I will not tell anyone that sister Phoebe is a witch and made me wings to fly."

I gathered the feathers in the air, bringing them together, overlapping them into the shape of wings. I brought them to Ria's back, holding them there as though they were attached to her.

My heart fluttered with contentment when her eyes glimmered as her mouth opened into an unending smile as she watched in awe. Mikael was gone from my mind as I watched my beloved sister raise her arms, flapping them like wings. I wanted more times like these, filled with pure, unadulterated joy, and fewer times of apocalypse and fear.

I levitated her slowly into the air, making sure she remained over the mattress to cushion her if she fell.

"Sister, I'm flying," Ria laughed. "Higher sister, higher."

I brought her back down to the bed. I did the same levitation with Matt, making him fly in the air before bringing him back down on the bed. "Sister, again."

I shook my head. Although making them fly was fun, I had an ulterior motive for showing them my magic. "No. Why don't I teach you magic? Then, you'll be able to fly by yourself." I turned to Matt, who had yet to say a word before. "How about you, Matty? Do you want to be a warlock?"

"W- wa- walok," he mumbled. He still had trouble pronouncing his "r" but he nodded.

Hekate's magic was not bound by bloodlines. Anyone could learn it so long as the Goddess granted permission to use her powers. Matt was only two and too young to handle the strain of magic on his body. It was Ria's fourth birthday, so she was just perfect to learn to channel magic. I sat facing Ria with her hands in mine. "Close your eyes, Ria. Take a deep breath in and let it all out. Relax and let your body turn into a noodle." She giggled as she relaxed. I channeled my power into my hands, letting a warmth flow through them.

"My hand feels warm."

"That's good. Now don't move. With just your thoughts, pull it in your body, in your chest."

Her eyes remained closed as she continued to breathe as I taught her. I could sense the magic around her body, but her brow furrowed. "Ria, remember our tug-of-war game? This is like the game. Think of a rope and pull it to your chest," I explained.

"I feel it. It's warm."

I stopped the meditation quickly before the power could cause any strain on Ria's body. She was still young and couldn't understand. Her body could not handle a long session channeling me. I would take things slow with her just as I practiced in the beginning.

"Does that mean I can fly now?"

I smiled. "No. We have to practice more. When you grow big like the goddess, you'll be able to fly by yourself. But, remember, it's our little secret."

I checked the Wikia timeline for the exact date of Mikael's arrival to Mystic Falls, but I couldn't. It just said 1995.

Spells: ignis incendium (fire blaze); etativel (levitate); emoc ot em (come to me).

It may seem weird to have backward, spells, but thinking about it, if chants in different languages can result in the same spell, then why not have spells in made-up languages, or English, or even backward spells like Zatanna from DC comics. I don't speak Greek or Latin or Hebrew. I'm just using a translation website to translate words to weave them into chants and spells that I'll be using in the future. I'm also gonna flex my poetry muscles to make some interesting English chants.

If any readers do speak Latin and Greek and Hebrew, please leave a review and write some interesting spells you want to see Phoebe use. I'm thinking of using Latin and Greek for elemental spells, Hebrew for protection spells; English for passive spells like cloaking spells. Please suggest spells with that in mind.

Thanks for reading.

See y'all soon, Jamie.