A/N: Special thanks to my fantastic beta-reader, TempestJuvano!

Chapter 14 – A diminished triad

Lucifer was lying on his bed, unable to sleep. He was confused, agitated, and well…aroused. He had come so close to the Detective—to be with the Detective—a few hours earlier. He would be lying—and he never lied—if he said that he hadn't imagined several times what it would be like to sleep with her, to admire and touch every patch of her glorious skin. But his imagination and sparse memories just didn't come up to the glorious reality he had almost grazed. She was radiant. She had looked so sinfully delicious in that red lingerie that his mouth dried at the mere memory.

His palm that had been resting on his stomach slid lower, wandering over to his hardened member. His fingers ghosted over it, the throbbing painful, almost begging for release. He closed his eyes and imagined that it was her hand and fingers that grazed his hardness ever so slightly. The temptation to imaging the Detective, right there, that way – while he jerked off – had never been so acute; but he felt it was wrong somehow. Deep down, he knew that it wouldn't bring him the relief he wanted – because he wanted so much more than that.

Lucifer thought about his previous session with Linda, and the two options they had discussed. It seemed that they should have considered a third option. Third, he huffed lightly. How ironic. Being a third wheel, being part of a Devil's Threesome had always been fun. Until today. For the first time in his long life, he was grateful they didn't do the deed because after that it would have been even more obvious what he had lost. The Detective would have got him out of her system, would have got rid of any crumble of attraction she might felt for him. She had made it clear that it would be a one-night thing. That she chose Pierce. That she'd still choose him after they'd gone through with their experience.

And there was another thought, which was even more painful. He had scrutinized Pierce from the moment he arrived at his house, looking for any trace of ulterior motives. But he hadn't been able to find any. And if it was true, if Pierce's intentions were pure, then Lucifer had no right to interfere with their relationship. To ruin her happiness. He wanted her to be happy, but the thought that he would never really be part of it shattered his heart.

Lucifer turned to his side and fixed his eyes on the huge windows of his bedroom. The first rays of the morning sun pierced through the dark fabric of the curtain. He slowly closed his eyes as he finally made his decision. Maze was right. Emotions – they suck.

He hated – had hated Hell, but it seemed easier now than this life of the human world, of decadence and involvement and – unpredictability. Something that had drawn Lucifer towards LA and its life of endless lights and spirits. Hell was predictable. Bleak and sombre – a perfect place for emotional emptiness. Perhaps that was what he needed right now. Emptiness that drained the feelings, about the Detective, and life with her, life in LA – and maybe lose himself in his tedious, dreadful job.

Lucifer finally sat up. He needed a good shower before starting his day, he thought, as he climbed off the bed and into the bathroom.

He went over and over his desire to go back to Hell as the hot water wafted into the bathroom, filling it up with steam. Maze would be thrilled. He shook his head, water flying off his hair. It was decided then, to him, that once he'd closed this case officially, he and Maze were free to leave LA.

oOo

Chloe was at Linda's office, bright and early, sipping a nice cup of coffee. She was glad that Linda had been able to fit her in before her first patient that day. She had texted Linda immediately, at early dawn, right after she'd woken up from the nightmare, before she could think anymore and change her own mind about seeing Linda.

It was an early appointment before Chloe had to go to the precinct. She had even had time to stop by the hospital. To her relief, Dan was much better, so she offered to bring Trixie to visit him in the afternoon, but Dan declined the offer. He still looked quite miserable, and he didn't want to scare their daughter, so they decided to wait until Dan got better.

Chloe hoped she would do better this time and not bluntly blurt out her problems as she had on her birthday. That would add to the confusion and embarrassment and painfulness that all of this was gradually becoming, whatever it was.

"So," Linda started gently, putting her mug on the small table next to her chair. "How can I help you, Chloe?"

"I…first, I have to thank you that you have the time for me. I know you're very busy, and I – I probably shouldn't have texted you so early in the morning, but…" she sighed and looked at her with an apologetic smile, "I didn't know who else to talk about this."

"It's okay, Chloe. We're friends. And I'll always have time for you," she smiled at her, crossed her legs, and focused her attention solely on Chloe. "After reading your message I had the impression that something was really bothering you."

"Yeah," she said. She was fiddling with the mug, grateful for this little distraction. Until yesterday, she was sure she would never tell anyone about her dreams. But the confusion that was growing in her had started to tear her apart.

"I'm struggling with something and I really don't know what I should do. And I don't even know if I can speak about this with you because it involves Lucifer. I know he's your patient, and I don't want to cause any ethical dilemma for you. I mean, it's probably a conflict of interest for you."

Linda was silent for a while as she considered her answer.

"Lucifer is not an ordinary patient. As you know, I didn't adhere to some important ethical standards of my job when I started to work with him. And although I have been following the most important rule for some time," she swallowed, and from the deep blush that appeared on her cheeks, Chloe knew which rule she implied, "our relationship is still far from what the textbooks describe as professional. I mean, he's not only my patient, but he's also my friend. And we have several friends in common, so my professional and personal roles have already been mixed. But if we stick to some rules, then this can work. There is doctor-patient confidentiality, so I can't tell anything about Lucifer that is related to our sessions. And although this is not a therapy session, the same applies to our current conversation. Anything you will tell me stays between us."

Chloe visibly relaxed.

"Thank you, Linda, I really appreciate that." She leaned back on the sofa and tucked an unbridled blonde lock behind her ear nervously. "Right, so…I started to have strange dreams."

Linda smiled kindly and nodded to encourage her.

Chloe fixed her eyes on the mug in her hands and continued more determinedly, "The first time, in my first dream, about a week ago, I – it started with Marcus. And then Lucifer appeared – I – I was making out with the both of them. But I woke up, before anything even happened. I pushed the dream out of my mind, you know, because – weird – it was very weird for me." She took a tiny pause and continued. "Then came this case – uh – with a couple who claimed that threesomes were - you know – that a third person in bed made their relationship somehow stronger. I mean –

Anyway, I spoke about the case with Marcus – I mean he's the chief and it was mostly about – anyway, so that night, I had the dream a second time, but this time it went – we went further, and there was something - some odd elements. Like, Marcus was blue – his body was cold and blue and chilling, while Lucifer was bright red. His touch felt so – unbearably hot. It was – they were like yin and yang.

So, the next day, it sort of slipped out - as in the topic of threesomes, not dreams, really, and Marcus asked me – if I wanted to – try a threesome."

She let out a shaky breath, and took a sip from her coffee, to steady herself.

"At first, I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what I wanted. But then, I thought maybe my dreams reflected my repressed desires. So – I said yes. I – Marcus was the one to suggest Lucifer as a third. I mean, he's got experience. I shared the idea with Lucifer, and he was in too. We had decided to do it yesterday – and were almost going through when – I got the call about Dan's accident." Linda nodded, understanding and knowledge of the accident reflecting in the therapist's eyes.

"I went home late last night, from the hospital, and that was when I had the last dream. Right before I called you." Chloe steeled herself to share the dream – it still shook her, just remembering it. "I – it was the same, as it started out – but – I didn't wake up in the middle of it. We were – you know… And after that, I was kissing Lucifer when Marcus started to fade out. So, I held onto him and kissed him, and he stopped fading. But then Lucifer began to disappear, and so I turned to him. I kept switching between them, but I couldn't – couldn't stop it. In the end, they both vanished. And I was alone. So incredibly alone." Chloe's voice caught in her throat. She almost whispered the last sentence, venturing a glance at Linda.

The therapist's posture was calm, and she looked at Chloe thoughtfully.

"It had to be very hard to deal with these dreams on your own."

"Yeah, they were upsetting. But you know, it's not just the dreams. Of course, everything about this threesome nonsense started with them, but I'm maybe more upset because of the events that followed them. I thought I could solve my conflicting emotions with this threesome, but I think I just made an even bigger mess," she sighed and buried her face in her palms.

"Okay, let's speak about these dreams, and maybe it will help you to understand these inner conflicts," Linda suggested. "According to some psychoanalytic theories, dreams can represent wish fulfilment, unconscious desires, and conflicts and they include a manifest and a latent content. What you just told me was the manifest content of your dreams, while the symbolic meaning would be the latent content. As far as I can consider, there are more latent contents in the last two dreams, so we should focus on them. For example, how would you interpret the colours, and this yin and yang impression?"

Chloe puffed some air out through her pursed lips and immersed herself in her thoughts for a few minutes.

"Well, Marcus and Lucifer have quite different personalities, so the different colours could symbolize this."

"And what are the differences between them?" After a short pause, she added, "Why do you think Marcus was blue and Lucifer was red in your dream?"

"Hm…Marcus has blue eyes, but it would be too obvious, I guess. Maybe blue represents calmness. Marcus is steady and collected; he's somebody I can rely on. And Lucifer is passionate and fierce like fire." She immersed herself in her thoughts again. Lucifer was just like that at the beginning of their partnership. Like an all-consuming wildfire. But then he changed. The fire was still there, but it didn't seem to be the destroying kind anymore. It was warming and lively and just so bright that it filled her life with light. "He has some warming kindness in him."

"Great, that's a good start, Chloe. Now, let's see the third dream. You told me that both Lucifer and Marcus vanished. What do you think this means?"

She was thinking about that a lot before she came to Linda. And deep down she knew the answer, still, she needed this gentle nudging to be able to put it into words.

"In the dream, I could stop the fading when I kissed them. But I could kiss only one of them at a time. This meant that if I tried to save one of them, it was a death sentence for the other. And because I couldn't make a decision and kept switching, I lost both of them," her voice quivered, and she cleared her throat to be able to finish the line of thought. "I think this means that if I'm not able to disentangle my emotions, then I will lose both of them for real."

"That's a quite logical interpretation."

"Yeah, but I still don't know what I should do next," she groaned exasperatedly.

"Well, I think that one aspect of the dream may help you with that."

"What do you mean?"

"You told me that one of them was vanishing when you didn't focus on him. I'm sure it was terrifying to see that."

"Yeah, it was awful."

"And which was more awful?"

"Huh?"

"Was it worse to know that you'll lose Marcus or was it worse to know that you'll lose Lucifer? You don't have to answer it now. Just think about it. And it may help you with dealing with your emotions."

Chloe bit her lower lip and nodded.

"I think you're right, Linda." She stood up and Linda followed suit. "I will think about it. Thank you again."

The conversation with Linda was quite overwhelming, and she knew she should sort all of this out, but right now she couldn't allow herself to be distracted while she drove to the precinct. So, she turned on the radio. For a while, she switched between channels, but there were either commercials or terrible songs everywhere. In the end, she found a music-related educational podcast and decided that it would be just perfect to calm her mind before she arrived at work.

"In today's broadcast, we will talk about chords or more precisely triads. As we defined it in our previous episode, a triad is a set of three notes that can be stacked vertically in thirds."

Chloe snorted and shook her head. She couldn't believe that the only sensible program she could find was about something with three elements. If she didn't know better, she would have thought that it was some sort of screwed-up celestial sign. She sighed deeply but decided to give it a shot.

"Last time we learned about major and minor triads that are the most commonly used types, and today I will speak about diminished triads. Have you ever seen a horror movie? Or a scene where a bad guy was planning something sinister? Then you probably heard a diminished triad. But let's see an example!"

With some further colourful commentary, the host gave some examples of major, minor, and diminished triads on a piano.

"See? Compared to the cheerful majors and sombre but tender minors, the diminished triads are dark, mysterious, and most of all dissonant."

The host kept talking, but Chloe no longer paid attention. She couldn't avoid thinking about this new revelation. A diminished triad. So, that's what they were. A dissonant chord that could not be played for long because the elements didn't really match. If she wanted harmony, she had to resolve it somehow.

When she stopped at a red light she thought about the end of her last dream. And the more she thought about it, the more certain she was about the answer. She had been terrified when she had seen Marcus fade away, but if she was honest to herself, it was nothing compared to the overwhelming panic she had felt when she thought she would lose Lucifer.

She really cared about Marcus. They had a lot in common and she was happy with him. But it was also true for her friendships in general. She realized that Marcus was just like a good friend to her. Well, a friend with benefits. The sex was great with him, and he was more passionate than she had originally thought, but something was still missing. A deeper connection. Love.

And this was the crux of the matter. She didn't love him.

But what about Lucifer? He had been her partner for years now, and they had become friends. Maybe more than friends, at least for a while. And the bitter memories rushed back at her in an instant. Just when they were getting together, when she had barely survived a serious poisoning, he had left her. And although they restored their partnership, they had never spoken about those moments on the beach again, and about the possibility of getting together. She assumed that Lucifer didn't want that, and she buried her previous feelings deeply to protect herself.

But something had changed lately. She could tell that Lucifer hated that she was together with Marcus, but she didn't know why. At first, she thought it was simply because he wasn't the centre of attention anymore. But then she realized that it wasn't just that. There was this occasional sadness in his eyes that he always tried to hide as soon as he noticed that she was studying him. And when he kissed her last night… She couldn't really describe the feeling, but it felt as if she was the centre of his universe. That he really cared about her. But what if she was wrong? If any of this was just wishful thinking? She would risk her heart again.

However, anything would be better than the current uncertainty. She had to speak with both of them. She decided that she had to break up with Marcus. It wouldn't be fair to him to stay with him while she was longing for someone else. She also needed to speak with Lucifer. She was determined to be honest with him, and if it turned out that Lucifer didn't reciprocate her feelings, she would ask him to end their partnership. Although they had always been a good team, she couldn't bear another rejection. She couldn't look into his eyes every day, knowing that he didn't feel the same. She didn't want to concentrate constantly on suppressing her feelings either.

She would have these conversations as soon as they closed the case. She parked her car at her usual spot in the underground garage of the precinct and shoved her feelings and personal life in the farthest corner of her mind. She owed the victim and Dan closure, and she wouldn't let them down. Detective Decker, at your service.

oOo

Marcus turned off the water with a sigh. Even the long hot shower couldn't ease his tension. He leaned forward and pressed his forehead to the damp tiles of the cabin. After Chloe told him to go home and get some rest, he really tried, but couldn't sleep a minute. And to his utter surprise, it wasn't because he was annoyed due to the inconvenient holdup in his plan. He was disturbed for a whole different reason, and it scared him.

After he had gotten his mark, he had decided very soon that he would keep his distance from other people, and it had worked quite well so far. He still felt the twinge of loss at starting everything over again and again, but he knew, had he let anyone truly know him, or involved, to be honest, then the agony of it would have been quite unbearable. It was difficult, but he learned gradually, not to get attached to anyone.

Until now.

Getting close to Chloe was part of his plan and he was sure that he could stay professional. But Chloe was so kind, and clever, and beautiful and compassionate. And for the first time in a very long time, he felt happy. He felt a strange drive that he had never felt before: he wanted to make her happy.

When they had invited Lucifer to spend a night with them, he was quite excited. At first, he thought it was because this little escapade would bring him closer to fulfilling his plan. And well, he was aroused as well. After all, it had been so long ago that he had been involved in anything like this. But it wasn't just that. He was excited that he could make Chloe happy. This sweet feeling lasted until Lucifer kissed her last night.

He was jealous. He couldn't admit it, even to himself at the moment, but now it was crystal clear. He didn't want to share Chloe, because he loved her.

He opened his eyes and pulled back his forehead from the tile. He loved her. His mouth curved into a small, sad smile at this thought. He knew that he was screwed. That he would suffer because of his carelessness, but it was too late. He couldn't change how he felt. So, he had to decide what to do next.

He grabbed a towel to dry himself, while he was thinking about it. And it was easier than he initially thought it would be. It was obvious that he couldn't follow his original plan. He couldn't hurt Chloe like this. Not anymore. Maybe he just had to follow his heart this time and be with her. But at some point, he had to be honest with her. She would notice that he's not ageing.

Hiding his identity was never an option. It was only a matter of time – but when should he tell her?

If he avoided the issue now, and told her later, or even if she found out, Marcus knew that Chloe would never forgive him for hiding the truth. But on the other hand, even if he told her right now, would she believe him, even if he presented her with proof? And even if she did believe that he was who he said he was, what then? Would she stay or leave?

But one thing Marcus had realised: if – and he hoped it would become true – if Chloe believed him and still chose him, to stay by her side till she left this world, he knew he would be there, no matter what, appreciating every day, hour, minute, second – every moment, awake and asleep together. And he would endure the pain – he would find a way to get through.

So, the new plan was simple. He would tell (and show) Chloe the truth and accept her decision, whatever it would be. He stepped out of the cabin and tossed the towel to the laundry basket. He turned to the sink and his breath hitched when he saw his reflection in the small mirror above it. His mark was gone. He grabbed his arm wildly to feel the proof that he wasn't imagining things. His fingers grazed the now unmarked surface of his skin. It was really gone. He became dizzy and had to grab the sink to avoid collapsing on the floor.

He glanced up to the mirror again and met his own confused gaze. This would change everything.