A/N: a huge thanks again to my wonderful beta-reader, Tempest_Juvano!

Chapter 19 – I will be at peace with it

The journey to the station was a blur. Fortunately, no one stopped Chloe to ask questions or express their sympathy. Everyone seemed too tied up to discuss the details of the lieutenant's sudden death with each other, so nobody noticed as she sneaked into his office.

Chloe stepped to Marcus's desk and opened the drawer carefully. There were several folders, documents, a few strewn about pens and pencils in there, but a strange-looking old folder soon caught her attention.

She opened it slowly and gingerly – as if, like Marcus, it would too die and disappear. Her head hurt now, a little, from exhaustion and emotion and sheer shock.

The folder was full of photos – of Marcus. Some were old and crumpled, some were cut out from old newspapers and had some accompanying text. As Chloe flipped through the strange pictures, a sheet of page, which looked like it had been folded up after being crumpled up, fell out of the folder. She unfolded it, and to her surprise, it was handwritten, with her name appearing in it several times. In some places words, sentences or even paragraphs were crossed out. A letter, maybe?

Suddenly, she felt a strangeness about it all. About the folder, the page, and where she was. She decided to leave with the folder. She didn't want to risk being caught inside Marcus's office, being questioned, or talked about.

All the way home, Chloe desperately tried to push out the thoughts about Lucifer, Marcus, and her newly upended reality. But the quiet and solitude of the car got to her. For a few minutes though, as she concentrated on driving, she was able to forget. But as she stopped at a red light, all the mental chaos slammed back at her with doubled force. She felt her ribcage stretch, her heart pounding so violently she thought it would break out. "Just breathe, Chloe," she told herself, as she tried to focus back on the wheel in her hand.

Legs trembling and head pounding, she reached her home, fortunately having calmed herself down and focussed back on driving. Luckily, Dan had made the calls for her, arranging to have Trixie stay with Chloe's mom for a few more days, so Chloe got in to an empty house.

She dropped onto the couch, trying to slow down her breathing, to just – catch herself. The folder lay beside her, photos having spilled out as she had dropped it.

She flipped through the pictures again, but this time, she took a closer look.

It didn't take long for her to realize that the pictures were taken at very different times. Some of them were quite yellowed or faded, and the clothes of the people on the pictures seemed strange. As if they were cast members in old movies.

Marcus was in each picture. One of the photos had fallen out of the folder and landed on the ground, upside down. Chloe read the number on the back. 1953.

She picked up the photo and studied it carefully. She could see the Los Angeles City Hall in the background, but everything else was so different. She spotted a vintage car at the right side of the picture and a very old-fashioned poster that advertised some kind of waffle that she had never heard about before. Three men were standing in the middle of the picture. She didn't recognize the one in the middle and the one on the left, but the third was definitely Marcus. He was wearing a light-coloured suit, a skinny tie, saddle shoes and a fedora hat. And he didn't look a day younger than she had last seen him today. How was it possible? She looked at the other photos. Every one of them had a year on its back. Chloe turned pale when she realized that the images covered the entire twentieth century.

Was it possible that Marcus had been – like Lucifer, maybe? Immortal? The idea sounded so strange in her head, even now.

Lucifer. Her stomach tightened at the memory of Lucifer's limp body. She had a strong urge to rush to LUX right away, but then she remembered Amenadiel's words. She had to wait until tomorrow. But why did Lucifer need to be away from her? Thousands of questions were swarming in her mind and she felt the start of a massive headache. She wanted answers, but now she had only one option. She picked up the white paper and began reading it. On closer inspection, it didn't really seem like a letter. It rather looked like a sketch for a speech. The first few sentences—or rather beginnings of sentences—were crossed out, but then the text became quite fluent.

Chloe, I have to tell you something. Actually, I have to tell you a lot of things. I wasn't completely honest with you, in the beginning. Although I think that you probably wouldn't have believed me anyway. Not without proof. When we started dating, I had some selfish motives, but you changed me. I started to have feelings I had never experienced before. I fell in love with you, Chloe. Which is ironic because

several words were crossed out

I know that if you get to know who I really am, I could lose you. But I have to be honest. If I want to be with you, I have to start with a clean slate. So, here we go…

You know me as Marcus Pierce, but this is just one name among the many others. I've been living a long life, longer than you could imagine. My first name – real name, was Cain. I'm sure you've heard the story from the Bible. And although it isn't entirely accurate, the most important thing is true. I did kill my brother. He was – a jerk, our conflicts escalated, but I'm not proud of what I did. Especially now that I'm with you. You're a good person, Chloe. And since I've been with you, I have wanted to be a better person. I didn't realize it until this day, but it's true.

After I killed my brother, God marked me. Remember my tattoo and the scar underneath it on my arm? That scar was the sign of my punishment. I was doomed to walk the Earth alone and see everything around me turn to ashes over and over again. Immortality was a curse and all I wanted was to die.

I tried a lot, to rid myself of the curse. Find a weapon, a way that would end my life. I had lived too many lifetimes, seen too many changes, lost people.

But eventually, that became old as I realised – there was nothing that could end the curse. Then I started to watch intently as celestials and the divine interacted with the earth. Lucifer was quite often here, so, I attended him closely. When I realized he became mortal around you, I thought maybe you could help me to die too. But I remained immortal around you. At first, I was frustrated and lost hope, but then I tried to figure out the reasons. Why did Lucifer become vulnerable when he was around you? I assumed it was because you loved him. So, I decided not to rest until you fall in love with me.

I wanted to be the perfect boyfriend because it served my plan well, but something changed after a while. Chloe, I've always kept my distance from other people. I didn't want to make any connection because it would just bring pain to my life. But when I was with you, I began to feel like I belonged somewhere. Like I belonged to someone. I think the events of our previous night helped me realize all this. When I saw Lucifer kiss you, I became jealous.

I realized that I don't want to share you with anybody. But I also realized that I couldn't hide the truth from you because you deserve much more than this. Besides, you would notice sooner or later that I'm not ageing. I decided to be honest with you, so you can make an informed decision. I didn't even care about my plan anymore.

And then something quite shocking happened. My mark has gone. I still don't know how that could have happened. Maybe because you finally fell in love with me? Or because I fell in love with you? Maybe my mark disappeared because I finally truly cared about someone. Because I cared more about your happiness than I cared about mine.

I was thinking about this a lot, but then I realized that it doesn't matter. I can finally die, but I also have the opportunity to try something with you. A real relationship. We could spend the rest of our life together if you'll have me.

I know it's a lot. And I understand if you need time to think about our relationship or if you want to break up with me. It's a lot for me as well. I've even made a note about what I want to tell you.

I love you, Chloe. And whatever you decide, I will be at peace with it. You have already redeemed my soul.

She could see a side note as well and her stomach somersaulted when she read it: When should I tell her that I was the Sinnerman?

Chloe dropped the paper back between the photos and closed the folder hastily. Her hands were shaking, and she realised another round of hyperventilation building up.

She felt her eyes well up, but for the first time since all hell broke loose—oh, the irony—she didn't want to stop it. The first wave of sobs erupted from her throat with a liberating force. The dam ruptured and she could finally surrender to her emotions.