A/N: Enjoy!
"You can bet your bottom dollar that the numero uno most underrated and underutilized tactic of survival when facing imminent danger perpetuated by adversaries of the living and breathing genus is an act both subtle and grandiose in its execution. It has saved my bacon from being fried to an overcooked crisp on many an occasion and will no doubt do so on many occasions more. You play possum, you survive. That is a guaran-damn-tee."
It was DJ Fun Guy's advice that RJ thought of after shaking off his shock from falling off the wall. He'd landed on his side with his back to the intruder and half his face pressed into the snow, and he was staying still, just like a possum. He was also focusing on the sound of footsteps getting closer and closer and closer. From the way the intruder was running, RJ could tell that his right leg was weaker than the left. That wasn't much for him to go on to plan his next moves, but it was enough.
When it sounded like the footsteps were really, really close, RJ sprang into action! He sat up and rolled forward into a crouch, stretched his right leg out, spun around real fast, and took the intruder down with a spinning heel kick, just like his Uncle Jesus taught him.
"Fuuuuuuck!" Rick bellowed as he landed hard on his back.
As naughty as that word was, RJ held in his giggle. This was a serious situation, and his mama always told him and Jude to keep a serious face on in serious situations. No giggles were allowed.
With a very serious face, he pulled his slingshot from his pocket, loaded it with a marble, and aimed it at the intruder's right knee.
Rick very quickly assessed the boy and rolled to his side with a groan. While the pain that exploded throughout his back was real, rolling to the side was a cover to check if other armed Alexandrians were approaching. It appeared to Rick that the boy was on his own.
"Keep quiet! Get on your back! And put your hands up!" RJ ordered.
When his commands weren't followed fast enough, he fired the marble into the snow next to the intruder's head.
"Keep quiet. Get on your back. And put your hands up," he said in a low and grumbly voice, just like his Uncle Daryl. "Now!"
Rick complied but gave the boy a hard glare for firing the weapon so close to his head. The glare was far from genuine. After everything he'd been through to get back to Alexandria, he was very much amused that a child of no more than eight years old had laid him out and was keeping him in check with a slingshot. He was also incredibly relieved that the boy seemed to be okay after that fall. He had no visible signs of injury, and Rick doubted that he was suffering from any internal injuries after pulling off that karate move.
Rick also observed how the boy hadn't so much as flinched from the glare that made most men quake in their boots. He credited that physical and mental toughness to Michonne. He was certain that Alexandria was raising fierce little warriors under her leadership.
RJ kept his serious face on, but the scary look on the intruder's face was very, very scary. The last time he was this scared was when Jude and Gracie told him a ghost story about a demon troll living in the old Whisperer caves. Gracie said the demon troll could only leave the caves when there was a full moon. Jude said the demon troll only left the caves to feed its belly and that the only thing it ever ate was little brothers. He was already a little scared because there was a full moon that night and he was a little brother! He was a lot more scared when he heard noises coming from their Uncle Daryl's bedroom. He just knew it was the demon troll looking for a little brother to eat! He didn't stick around to get eaten. He ran out of Jude and Gracie's blanket fort and ran straight to his mama's room so she could save him.
It turned out the demon troll was just Miss Carol. When Jude came up to apologize for making up stories, she told him that she'd heard their mama tell their Uncle Aaron that Miss Carol broke into the house looking for medicines.
RJ was just as scared now as he was when he thought a demon troll was trying to eat him. He wanted to run back home to get his mama to protect him from the scary intruder, but he knew he couldn't show weakness in a serious situation. He would stay put and try to be scary like the intruder.
He scrunched his face the way the intruder's face was scrunched and squinted his eyes the way the intruder's eyes were squinted. He took a step closer to get a better look at the scary-looking face, but it was too hard for him to see anything with his eyes almost closed. He opened them and took a step back.
The intruder had a bushy, white beard and a red nose just like Rudolph, and his beanie was pulled down low to his eyebrows. The face didn't look familiar to RJ.
He redirected his slingshot when one of the walkers the intruder had been standing by started growling. He fired a marble between the walker's dead eyes, and as its body fell, he reloaded his slingshot, aimed it at the second walker, and fired another marble.
His aim was off. The marble hit the walker in the nose.
"F-word!" RJ whispered.
He reloaded his slingshot, aimed, and fired again. This time, the shot landed in the center of the walker's forehead and the walker dropped. RJ reloaded his slingshot and returned his aim to the intruder's right knee.
"Do you have any weapons on you?" he growled.
Rick stared at the fallen walkers with his mouth gaping.
"Do you have any weapons?" RJ asked again, impatiently.
Rick heard the boy's questions but couldn't tear his eyes away from the walkers.
RJ rolled his eyes and slid his slingshot into the back pocket of his jeans. He pulled his switchblade from his boot, flipped it open, and squatted down.
"Mister, do you know what the femrol vein is?" he asked, pressing his blade against the intruder's thigh.
RJ watched the intruder's eyes as they slowly looked away from the walkers and looked down at the blade.
"You mean the femoral vein," Rick replied coolly, looking up from the blade to look into the boy's eyes. "I'm familiar with it."
RJ did his best to keep his hand steady, but those blue eyes were even scarier than the scrunchy, squinty face.
"Good," he said, trying to show no fear. "Then you know if I cut it, you'll be in big, big trouble."
"I will," Rick agreed.
He wondered if Siddiq was still a part of Alexandria and if he was the reason the boy knew about the femoral vein.
"Then you better not move," RJ warned, pressing down on the blade a little to let the intruder know he was serious. "I'm gonna check you for weapons now. Don't try anything."
Rick could have easily wrestled the knife away from the boy and subdued him, but he found the situation they were in to be oddly comforting. Mainly because of how much the boy was reminding him of Carl.
"You're ok from that fall?" he asked as the boy patted down his legs.
RJ ignored the question. His Uncle Jesus taught him how to land soft in hard falls, but he wasn't telling the intruder that.
"Unzip your coat!" he ordered. "And then raise your hands back up!"
Rick did as he was told.
"I've never seen anyone use a slingshot like that before," he commented. "You're very skilled."
RJ ignored the compliment. He was good with the slingshot because his Aunt Connie's sister Kelly taught him how to use it, but he wasn't telling the intruder that either.
"Keep quiet!" he grumbled.
Rick smirked to himself because the boy's surly little face looked so much like Carl's surly little eight-year-old face. All the boy needed was the sheriff's hat to complete the look.
"You have a name?" Rick asked.
RJ sighed and patted down the intruder's right side. "Don't we all?" he deadpanned.
Rick couldn't disagree with that.
"I reckon we do," he said as the boy patted down his left side.
RJ finished his weapons search and was happy to not find anything, but he couldn't be too happy because of what he was supposed to do next. Alexandrians had to follow Level 2 Red Alert rules if an intruder got this close to Alexandria. What RJ wanted to do was continue on his way to the North Pole to go see Santa to get his one wish. He wouldn't be able to do that if he woke up his mama and Alexandria was put under a Level 2 Red Alert.
RJ looked in the direction of north and decided he could handle things himself. He put his switchblade back in his snow boot, stood, and pulled his slingshot from his back pocket.
"Are you here alone?" he growled while loading his slingshot with another marble and aiming at the intruder's right knee.
"I am," Rick answered, wondering how the boy knew to target his right leg. "It was just me and those walkers."
RJ glanced back at the walkers. Because of Alpha and her Whisperers, it was a Level 1 Red Alert for walkers to get this close to Alexandria. The Whisperers were wiped out, but he would have to check the walkers he put down to be sure they weren't skin freaks.
"Don't move, or you'll be sorry," he warned the intruder.
He scrunched his face and squinted his eyes to look scary.
The boy's adorable face made it tough for Rick to hold back a smile.
"I'll be as still as stone," he promised.
RJ was stumped. He knew what skipping stones meant because his Uncle Siddiq always took him and Jude to the lake in the summertime to skip stones. He'd never heard as still as stone before.
"I won't move," Rick explained, seeing the puzzled look on the boy's face.
"Oh," RJ replied.
He was glad he knew what it meant now.
"Stay as still as stone, or you'll be sorry," he growled.
He walked backwards to the walkers with his slingshot still aimed at the intruder. When he made it to the walkers, he fired the marble into the snow near the intruder's right leg as another warning.
"Still as stone!" Rick called out.
"Better be," RJ mumbled, noticing the footprints the intruder and walkers had left in the snow.
He also noticed a backpack off to the side but checked out the walkers first. He looked from one to the other and decided they were missing too many body parts to be people pretending to be walkers. He used the toe of his snow boot to make sure their faces weren't masks.
"I knew it," he said to himself.
Their faces stayed attached just like he thought they would.
He put his slingshot down to pick up the backpack and sat on the back of one of the walkers to go through it. The first thing he pulled out was a small wood carving of a cat with a baby kitty curled up against it. He gasped because his mama loved cats, but he didn't think she'd like this one because there was only one baby kitty instead of two. He dropped the carving in the backpack to see what else was in it. He found an empty water bottle, some apples, a flashlight, batteries, a compass, and a map.
RJ gasped when he saw the map. The man was on a journey like he was! He popped up and ran over to the man.
"Hey," Rick smiled when the boy stopped at his side.
"Oh no," RJ groaned. "My slingshot."
He ran back to where he'd left his slingshot, picked it up, and ran back to the man.
"Take a minute to catch your breath," Rick told the boy, who was panting from all the running.
RJ thought that was a good idea. He caught his breath and then loaded his slingshot and aimed it at the man's right knee.
"I saw your footprints," he said. "They're coming from the east. You passed the guard station?"
"I did," Rick confirmed. "And I didn't hurt anybody," he added when the boy frowned at him. "I stopped to announce myself, I knocked on the door, but no one answered."
RJ huffed and rolled his eyes because Scott was on guard duty and must have fallen asleep.
Rick held in a chuckle at that annoyed little eye roll, though he understood the boy's annoyance. He'd rolled his own eyes when his knocking on the guard station door went unanswered. He didn't know if security was lax because things were just that good here or if there was a lapse in security. The boy's eyeroll convinced him it was the latter.
"Would you have hurt someone? If they answered when you knocked?" RJ asked.
"No," Rick answered honestly. "I wouldn't've."
"Why? Because you don't have any weapons?" RJ asked.
"Because it wouldn't have been necessary," Rick told him. "It wouldn't have been right."
RJ liked that answer. His mama always told him and Jude that they should never hurt someone unless they had no choice.
"But why don't you have any weapons?" he asked.
"Because I don't need 'em," Rick replied.
That was the short and sweet answer. The long and sour answer that Rick wasn't going to get into with a child was that he didn't need a weapon because he'd been made into a weapon of sorts.
"Wow," RJ whispered to himself, lowering his slingshot.
He thought it was sooooooo cool that the man didn't need weapons! Maybe even cooler than how Ezra's daddy Mister Jerry used to fight side-by-side with a tiger.
"Can I ask you something?" RJ asked.
"You can," Rick answered, slowly lowering his hands.
"Why do you your walkers look like that?"
Rick sat up to look at the walkers but was unsure of what the boy meant.
"Like pets. They're tied to the tree like pets," RJ said. "Why?"
Rick's jaw tensed while he stared at the walkers.
"Because that's what they were to me," he sneered.
In their living and breathing forms, Jadis and Dr. Eleanor Baxter were the two people Rick held primarily responsible for his captivity. The last moments of their lives weren't filled with nearly enough pain for his liking, but they suffered by his hands as they took their last breaths, and that brought him some solace.
Their walker lives were meant to be gifts for Michonne, regardless of whether she welcomed his return or not. After learning what he'd been through, she would need something to take her vengeance out on, and Jadis and the doctor were the only things he could bring her. Everything else and everyone else connected to his kidnapping had been scorched in his escape.
"What happened to their arms? And their mouths?" RJ asked.
Rick looked into the boy's big, brown eyes and felt his tension drain away.
"I got rid of 'em," he answered. "Without their arms and mouths, they can't scratch or bite. That takes the danger out of 'em. It keeps 'em under my control. It keeps other walkers away."
"It does?" RJ asked in amazement, looking back at the walkers.
He couldn't wait to tell Jude, Ezra, and Gracie what he just learned!
Rick briefly glanced at the walkers, dismayed that they were now truly lifeless.
When RJ saw how sad the man looked, he felt real bad about taking his pets from him.
"Hey, mister?" he said softly.
He waited for the man to look at him so he could apologize the way his mama taught him—by looking him in the eyes.
"I'm real sorry I killed your pets," he apologized. "We don't let walkers get so close to Alexandria. Not after the Whisperers."
The remorse in the boy's voice hit Rick hard in the chest. He wouldn't allow the boy to feel bad about Jadis and that doctor.
"Hey! Don't apologize for what you had to do," he said firmly. "If the rule is no walkers, you have no reason to feel bad about anythang. You did good, son. Real good."
RJ fiddled with his slingshot while he thought over what the man said.
Rick was relieved when a big smile lit up the boy's face. He smiled in return, though his smile was to mask his concern over the mention of the Whisperers. Throughout the years, he held on to the hope that the Saviors was the last fight for Alexandria and that Michonne's charter had somehow resulted in an everlasting peace.
It sounded like there'd been another fight.
There was always another fight.
Guilt steamrolled through Rick because he wasn't here with Michonne fighting by her side to protect what was theirs.
"Hey, mister?" RJ said softly.
Again, the boy's big, brown eyes calmed Rick.
"Yes?" he answered.
"Can I ask you something?"
"You sure can," Rick smiled, giving a nod of encouragement.
"How many walkers have you killed?"
A gasp of surprise escaped from Rick's lips. It had been ages since he'd been asked or asked anyone that question. It took him back to the beginning when this world was still brand new, back to the start of his new world family.
"Too many to count," he answered.
RJ believed that answer and was happy with it.
"How many people have you killed?" he asked the man.
Rick's gaze shifted to the two lifeless walkers. "Too many to count," he answered.
RJ also believed that answer and was also happy with it.
"Why?" he asked the man.
"Because I would do anythang to keep the people I love safe," Rick answered fiercely.
RJ really, really liked that answer a lot. It was something his mama, and sister, and aunts and uncles would say. It sounded like something the Brave Man would say if he was here.
RJ put the slingshot and the marble in his front coat pocket and sat down cross-legged in front of the man. His mama always told him and Jude to trust their guts with people, whether they were intruders or old friends. His gut was saying that the man wasn't a danger to him or Alexandria. He just needed to figure out what to do with his new friend.
"Can I ask you something?" RJ asked, putting his elbows on his thighs and resting his face in his gloved hands.
Rick pulled his legs back so that he was sitting cross-legged as well.
"Of course," he smiled. "You can always ask me anythang."
"I can?" RJ gasped in delight.
"You can," Rick grinned. "What's your question?"
"Why are you here in Alexandria? Where'd you come from?" RJ asked.
Now that Rick was sitting upright and getting a good look at the boy, he could see how the cold had turned his cheeks, nose, and ears red.
"I'll answer your questions," he said, "but I need to do somethin' first, if you'll let me."
"Ok," RJ replied, trusting his new friend.
Rick took his beanie off and scooted closer to the boy but froze after he covered the boy's curls with the beanie.
"Is this ok?" he asked.
RJ nodded enthusiastically. His head was so cold. He wasn't going to say no to the warmth.
When a small gust of wind made his new friend's curly brown hair bounce around, RJ wanted to giggle. His mama and Jude always told him he had crazy curls. His new friend had crazy curls, too!
"What's that smile for?" Rick asked as he secured the beanie in place.
RJ gave a little shrug.
"You said you'd answer my questions," he reminded his friend.
"I did," Rick said distractedly, eyeing the boy's coat and gloves. "Your coat and gloves are warm enough? Do you need mine?" he asked.
RJ shook his head no. His mama always made sure that his and Jude's winter clothes were the warmest.
"My gloves and coat are plenty warm, and now my head will be warm, too," RJ smiled. "Thank you."
"You're welcome," Rick grinned, impressed by the boy's good manners.
It was something else he credited to Michonne's strong leadership.
"You let me know if you change your mind and need 'em, ok?"
RJ nodded.
"And you're not hurt from that fall? Nuthin's sore or feels funny?" Rick asked.
RJ shook his head no.
"You're sure?"
"I'm sure," RJ answered.
"You'll let me know if somethin' starts to hurt?"
"Yes. My questions, please," RJ said a little impatiently.
Rick chuckled to himself and scooted back.
"To answer your questions, I'm comin' from Montana—"
"The Treasure State! Helena is the capital!" RJ interrupted, remembering what he'd learned in his states and capitals lessons with Jude.
"That's right," Rick nodded, "but I wasn't in Helena. I was almost four hundred miles away in Miles City."
He left it at that. The boy didn't need to know how he came to be in Miles City or that he'd been held against his will for years at a research facility designed for livestock and cattle. He wouldn't share details about the grueling two years it took him to get from Montana to Virginia. It was a journey made mostly by foot that started with a group of about fifty others who'd also been kidnapped and turned into test subjects. The group's size thinned as the survivors gradually split off to return to their own corners of the country, until his only travel companions were Heath, the long-lost Alexandrian who he now considered to be a brother, and Heath's pregnant wife Jasmine, a doctor at the research facility who helped them plan their uprising. They separated in Kentucky where Heath and Jasmine headed north to find Jasmine's people in Ohio.
Due to the severe winter weather conditions, it had taken Rick over two months to get to Alexandria from Kentucky.
"And the reason I'm here is for my family," he told the boy.
"You are?" RJ gasped.
"I am," Rick murmured, staring at Alexandria's wall. "I'm here for my family.
RJ wanted to be excited for his friend, but he couldn't think of anyone in Alexandria who had family coming to visit. Because of Alpha and her Whisperers, Alexandrians had to let the Council know when someone was coming to visit and how long they were staying. RJ secretly listened to weekly Council meetings with Jude, and that's how he knew no one had family coming, but only the Council would know for sure.
RJ gasped in excitement.
"My mama can tell you if your family's here!" he exclaimed, popping up from the snow.
"She can?" Rick asked.
"Yes!" RJ answered, grabbing his friend's hand. "She's head of security! I'll take you to her!"
Rick preferred to see Michonne and Judith as soon as possible, but he didn't think it was a bad idea to meet with the head of security first. It would allow him to gauge how well-received his return would be and give him a chance to fish for information about Michonne. There were also obvious security breaches that needed to be discussed, and more importantly, the boy's mother needed to know about her mischievous son.
"We just have to see Santa first," RJ said, tugging on his friend's hand to get him to get up.
"Santa?" Rick asked, unsure if he'd heard the boy correctly.
RJ nodded, tugging even harder.
"It's Christmas?" Rick asked, looking around and searching for some sign that Alexandria was celebrating the holiday.
"Christmas was yesterday!" RJ told him, still tugging.
Rick hadn't thought about Christmas in years but hearing that he'd missed spending the day with his girls by one day was crushing.
"That's why we have to go to the North Pole! We have to go see Santa to get my one wish!" RJ said, now using both of his hands to try to pull his friend up. "I ate all my vegetables. I always asked for extra tomatoes. I stopped pulling my sister's braid. I was good all year."
Rick stared at the boy in disbelief.
"Santa owes me," RJ grunted out, giving his all as he tugged.
"That's why you're out here so early all by yourself? To find Santa?" Rick asked in disbelief.
RJ stopped tugging to nod and catch his breath.
Rick's reaction to the boy's response was a feeling of overwhelming disappointment.
"That's…"
He started to tell the boy that what he was doing was reckless, and foolish, and dangerous, and… childish. But when he looked into the boy's bright eyes, his disappointment melted away. The reckless, foolish, and dangerous behavior needed to be addressed, but he couldn't fault the child for being childish. A child deserved to still be that, even in these times. Especially in these times. It's what he always wanted for Carl.
However, he wasn't going to let the boy to go on a wild goose chase in search of a man that didn't exist.
"You can't go to the North Pole, son," he said firmly.
RJ dropped his friend's hand.
"Why not?" he frowned.
"Because Santa isn't…" Rick stopped himself before saying something that could ruin the boy's childhood. "Because won't your folks be worried or scared when they wake up and see you're gone?" he asked.
"No. I left my mama a letter, and she won't be scared anyways because I'm brave, too!"
RJ didn't like the look he saw on his friend's face. It was the same look his mama got when she wasn't changing her mind about something. He looked in the direction of north and stomped away from his friend. He had to get to the North Pole.
"Where are you goin'?" Rick asked.
He pinched the bridge of his nose when the boy didn't answer. The boy was so much like Carl. But with Carl, Rick could put his foot down. He couldn't do that with the boy. He was going to have to try to reason with him.
"Can we talk?" he called out as he stood up.
RJ ignored his friend and kept walking.
"We should talk!" Rick called out, putting his hands on his hips and watching the boy stomp away. "I heard what you said when you shot that second walker!" he called out. "I bet your mama wouldn't be too happy to hear that you said 'f-word'."
RJ whipped around to face his friend.
"I didn't say 'f-word' for real!" he pouted.
"You didn't, but I bet she wouldn't be happy with what you said. And I bet it wouldn't be hard for me to find her and tell her. She's head of security, right?"
RJ looked up at the sky and groaned. He could get away with not flushing the toilet, and hiding pillows under a blanket, and eating so many of his mama's favorite cookies, but he would be in big, big trouble if she found out he said 'f-word'.
He dragged his feet as he walked back over to his friend.
"Stop poutin'," Rick gently scolded when the boy was standing in front of him. "I just wanna talk."
He held his hand out for the boy to take.
"Ezra would never snitch on me," RJ grumbled, taking his friend's hand.
"Ezra's your best buddy?" Rick asked.
RJ looked away and nodded.
"It's good to have a best buddy," Rick smiled.
RJ shrugged. It was true, but he didn't feel like talking about his bestest friend. His new friend was a snitch, and he was about to be in big, big trouble with his mama, and he didn't know if he would get to go see Santa to get his one wish.
Rick gave the boy's hand a squeeze.
"I'm gonna go to the North Pole with you," he said.
"You are?" RJ gasped, looking up at his friend.
"I am. If you answer some questions first."
"I will! I'll answer all the questions!" RJ grinned, bouncing up and down.
"Alright," Rick smiled. "What's your plan? If we're goin' to the North Pole, I need to know your plan."
"To go to the North Pole to go see Santa to get my one wish!" RJ beamed.
"That's the goal not the plan," Rick replied. "What's the plan? How do we get to the North Pole?"
"We go north," RJ deadpanned. "It's the North Pole."
"That's true," Rick chuckled, "but how long will it take us to get there?" he asked seriously. "Hours? Days? Weeks? Longer?"
RJ kept quiet because he didn't know the answer to that.
"What about food and water?" Rick asked. "We'll need to keep our energy up in these conditions. All I have are a couple apples. Do you have enough food and water for the both of us?"
RJ knew that he didn't. He'd eaten all his Oreos and a stick of jerky on his way to the wall. He hadn't thought to bring any water.
"And what about shelter?" Rick asked. "We'll need places to stop when we need rest or if we have to camp. Places that we know are safe and can keep us warm. Are you prepared to clear an old house or an old building?"
RJ wasn't sure if he was prepared to clear. He thought he could do it, but his mama or another adult always did the clearing.
"What about threats out there?" Rick asked. "You took care of my walkers, but what about walkers who aren't tied to a tree? What if we come across a horde? What if we come across people who are rotten to the core and want to harm us?"
Rick got down on his knees to look the boy in his eyes.
"These are the thangs you have to think about before you go out there and risk your life or ask anyone to risk their life for you," he said.
RJ looked down at his feet. He didn't think he had to think about those things because Santa was going to look out for him.
"I think maybe we should get you outta the cold and go find your mama," Rick said. "What do you think?"
His heart wasn't prepared for the big, brown, watery eyes that looked up at him.
"We can't see my mama until I get my one wish," RJ whispered.
Rick decided right then and there to work with the boy's folks to do whatever he could to make sure he got his one wish.
"And what's your one wish, son?"
Only Santa and Ezra knew what his one wish was, but RJ wanted to tell his new friend.
"My one wish is for my daddy," he whispered. "Ezra has Mister Jerry. Coco has Uncle Siddiq. Gracie has two whole daddies," he sniffled. "I just want my one."
Rick's heart ached and then broke for the boy. If it was his place to do so, he would wrap his arms around him and hug away as much sadness as he could.
"And mama needs my daddy most of all," RJ whispered, "so she can keep smiling."
Rick's broken heart broke again.
"King Ezekiel tried to be my daddy when I was littler," RJ pouted, "but my mama told my tía that he was just real, real sad about Miss Carol. And Scott wants to be my daddy now," he grumbled, kicking at the snow. "He's always looking at my mama's butt."
RJ sniffled again and wiped his nose. He didn't want anyone trying to be his daddy anymore. He already had a daddy.
Rick wiped away the tears that had fallen down the boy's face.
"I'm not crying," RJ sniffled. "I'm a big kid. Big kids don't cry."
"You are a big kid," Rick agreed, wiping away more of the boy's tears, "but it's ok if you're cryin'. You're never too big to cry."
RJ responded with a sniffle. He didn't think his friend would fib, but he wasn't sure if what he said about crying was true. He'd have to talk to Ezra about it later.
"Can I tell you somethin'?" Rick asked.
When the boy nodded, Rick took both of his hands and held onto them. He didn't want to overstep, but as someone who had dealt with unimaginable loss, he needed to say something.
"Sometimes… sometimes you lose the people you hold dearest to your heart," he said softly. "It feels like the worst thang in the world when you do because you don't want to lose 'em. And as much as you pray and hope and beg and wish for thangs to be different, there's nothin' you can do to bring 'em back. But just because they're gone, that doesn't mean they're not here with you anymore. They live on in your memories, and in the thangs you do or say, and in all the other people who knew 'em and loved 'em, too. Do you understand what I'm sayin', son?"
RJ nodded because he did understand.
"They live inside our hearts and make us brave, too," he said, remembering what Jude told him.
"That's right. They're always still here even when they're gone."
"But my daddy's not gone," RJ told his friend. "My daddy doesn't live in the sky with my brothers. He's just disappeared. That's why we have to go see Santa! Santa can disappear him back with a blink of his eyes. Like this…"
RJ blinked his eyes.
Rick's eyebrows rose high in confusion.
"Your daddy disappeared?" he asked.
"Yes! My mama and my Uncle Daryl said so! They said it was like he was just disappeared!"
Rick swallowed hard as the wheels in his mind started spinning.
"Your Uncle Daryl?" he asked.
RJ nodded. "My Uncle Daryl always goes up and down the river looking for my daddy, but he has to stop when the baby comes. And my mama always goes to the bridge where my daddy was disappeared, but it makes her so sad. That's why I have to find Santa! Santa can bring my daddy back!"
Rick let out a very shaky breath.
"Y-your daddy disappeared on a bridge?" he whispered.
RJ nodded, too excited to tell his friend the story about his daddy, the Brave Man.
"The Brave Man was on the bridge all by himself with millions of walkers, and my mama and all their friends were on the other side of the bridge. And I was there, too! But I was in my mama's tummy! The Brave Man blew up the bridge to keep my mama and all their friends safe. All the walkers fell into the water, and the Brave Man saved my mama, and his friends, and me!"
RJ waited for his friend to say something about how brave his daddy was, but his friend didn't say anything. RJ thought he must have told the story wrong because his friend's face turned really, really white and his eyes filled up with lots and lots of tears. He moved to his side to rub his back the way his mama rubbed his back when he was upset. He didn't know if he was doing it right because his friend's shoulders were shaking so hard and his tears were falling so fast, but RJ kept rubbing.
All Rick could feel was a gigantic tsunami of emotion slamming into him. When it passed, he mustered all of his strength to gently pull on the boy's hand until the boy was standing in front of him.
"Your brothers," he rasped, "their names are Carl and Andre."
RJ giggled at the way he said Carl.
"Those are my brothers in the sky," he said, wiping the tears from his friend's face.
"And your big sister," Rick rasped, "her name is Judith."
"That's my sister!" RJ chirped. "But Jude's only a little bigger," he grumbled.
More tears leaked from Rick's eyes. His shoulders started to tremble again.
"And your mama's name," he rasped, choking on his words while staring into the brown eyes he now recognized as Michonne's. "It's Michonne? Your mama's name is Michonne."
"That's my mama!" RJ grinned. "She's a bad mamma jamma! That's what DJ Fun Guy said!"
RJ thought about the questions his friend just asked and tilted his head to the side.
"Hey… how do you know my mama, and my sister, and my brothers?" he asked suspiciously.
"The head tilt," Rick giggled through his tears, taking in every bit of the little face he created with Michonne.
RJ watched as even more tears spilled from his friend's blue eyes and then gasped.
Jude told him the only thing she remembered about the Brave Man was that his eyes were blue like the sky.
RJ looked up at the sky.
His friend's eyes were blue just like the sky.
RJ gasped again.
His friend was so brave to come from so far away with no weapons, and his friend came to Alexandria for his family, and his friend knew who his mama, sister, and brothers were, and his friend said he would do anything to keep the people he loves safe.
And his friend had crazy curls, just like he did!
RJ's mouth fell open.
"DADDY!" he shouted, launching into his daddy's arms. "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!"
"Son," Rick said in a broken whisper, hugging his son tight, never ever wanting to let go.
"You're my one wish, daddy! My one wish came true!"
A/N: Merry Christmas! It took a while, but we got there. Lol. Thank you for reading!
Reviews of this chapter are very much appreciated.
#KeepRichonneAlive