During Volume 14 Chapter 8, Second Half
Spring break was not a time of rest for everybody.
The word "break" was misleading. Most people would assume that a break was an escape from the stresses of a learning or working life. That was not always true, depending on one's responsibilities. Take, for example, my father's so-called vacations. While he did not have to attend his usual workplace, a large portion of that time was used to strengthen his informal relationships. I wondered how relaxed he really felt playing golf with certain bigwigs? The other part of his vacations was spent with us, but was he actually comfortable having to constantly tiptoe around my mother?
Analyzing the word "break" more carefully, one would find that it pertained to escape was from a select number of duties only. This would then free up time to pursue other duties. Of course, they were not guaranteed to be less difficult than one's main duties.
Indeed, our spring break started off not with a party but with work to prepare a certain kind of party — the joint prom. My workload did not lessen compared to regular school days. I had to ensure that the event hall was reserved for us, manage the work of our large crew, and ensure that the budget was in place.
Of course, Sobu's budget was extremely limited. Even worse, any cash or resource provided by our side would technically be under-the-table, given our unofficial status. Thus, we had no choice but to depend quite heavily on the pocketbooks of Kaihin Sogo.
We used the now-familiar community centre as our workspace. The staff was on rotation, dependent on their availability. Today, Hikigaya, Isshiki and I were meeting up with Tamanawa and company to finalize the details of the budget.
At present, Tamanawa sat in front of us, reading over our pamphlet. His brown hair was neatly groomed, although in a questionable fashion. He had a fairly distinguishable businessman-like face and often desired to stand out. What truly pushed him past averageness were his tendencies to spout jargon and the tumbling of his hands that spaghettified his fingers.
"This venue is great. I like it," excitedly spoke Tamanawa, "This conforms exactly and compactly with the proposal."
With a frown, I questioned his use of the word "compactly" in this circumstance.
It would be the first time that Tamanawa, and most likely anyone from his school, would hold a prom, so his excitement after seeing the details was understandable. Furthermore, it had never been revealed to him that the original proposal was a sham. There was no damper in the middle. His excitement had only grown since Hikigaya first spoke to him about it.
Next to Tamanawa was Orimoto. She had a bob cut, though the curliness of her permed hair was the more prominent aspect. She was friendly and excitable but of a different variety than Yuigahama. Yuigahama's friendliness was sisterlier whereas Orimoto seemed more like a partygoer.
Tamanawa passed the papers over to Orimoto. She gave it a quicker read-over than him, but her enthusiasm was no less than his.
"Ooh, looks good to me," she beamed.
Isshiki and Hikigaya nodded twice in unison, greedy to push the meeting along. I was no exception, of course. I hurriedly pressed on before they could form any doubts.
"The issue is that it's available only on the first week of April… which coincides with our farewell ceremony. Are you fine if we proceeded to reserve this time period?" I asked.
"Of course," happily spoke Tamanawa, "We'll actually be conducting our farewell ceremony fairly soon, so I expect many of our graduates will be available then. It'll be relatively easier to have them attend."
Most schools in Japan had a similar schedule. I did not expect him to bring up any issues, but it was worthwhile to get ourselves on the same wavelength. That was crucial for collaboration.
"Sounds great to me! I mean, we're not gonna get anywhere if we can't get the people," spoke a fired-up Orimoto.
Hikigaya spoke up, "That leaves the budget, but can we rely on your student council for that?"
Hikigaya jumped directly into the meat of our negotiations. I straightened myself in my seat.
"Let's see… Even if we share the expenses evenly, we should be prepared for some personal expenses," rationally spoke Tamanawa, "Otherwise, I believe we'll have the room to shoulder some of the burden."
Hikigaya uneasily responded, "Uhh… actually, we're a little strapped for cash, you see…"
"Hm?"
With his eyes, Tamanawa implored us to expand on that point.
"Um, the thing is, we can't use our budget, so…" Isshiki muttered.
"Hm?"
With the same tone as before, he sought for even more explanation. It seemed that he was genuinely confused, and so was I.
"Did Hikigaya-kun not inform you?" I asked him, "Our student council is participating only as volunteers, not as sponsors for this event."
"Hm… Hmm? So you're saying, we can't make use of your budget?" fearfully questioned Tamanawa.
Three nods came from our side. At that, Tamanawa's smile started to crack.
"O-Oh, I don't think we can foot the entire bill, I think, h-hahaha…" he croaked.
This was unexpected. No, this was irresponsible. I turned to the expectedly irresponsible person beside me and pinched his thigh.
"I see, so it sounds like you never came to an agreement on that," I uttered under my breath.
It was Hikigaya's turn to make a strained smile. He looked like he was about to cry, almost as if somebody was subjecting him to physical torture (what could be the reason?). He tried to shrink himself into his clothes, almost as if there were two female glares from either side of him boring holes into his head.
Isshiki eventually nodded to herself, reluctantly accepting the situation.
"Which means, we'll need to include an admission fee," suggested Isshiki.
Without either of the organizing parties having sufficient funds to cover the prom's expenses, we had no choice but to turn to the guests themselves. Having the consumer bearing the cost was a valid business tactic, but there were of course obvious issues.
"That could be a little problematic… There might be some people who might not be so welcoming if they hear of a fee," reasoned Tamanawa.
Tamanawa hit the nail on the head, using surprisingly concise words. I had expected him to say something along the lines of the high elasticity of demand would greatly decrease the quantity of participants, should the price rise above zero.
Sobu's graduates didn't experience an admission fee for our first prom, so they would most definitely be put off by a prom with one. Kaihin Sogo's graduates were inexperienced with the idea of a prom, so they required a zero-cost push in order to achieve our desired attendance.
Hikigaya advised, "Then, we can do some crowdfunding. Let's invite some willing investors."
I nodded, having no issue with his suggestion. It may be the only way forward.
Hearing the word "crowdfunding", Tamanawa's face lit up.
"I see… There's some potential there," he contemplated.
"Totally! Probably," agreed Orimoto.
"Is there…?" critically spoke Isshiki, "They're still paying in the end, aren't they?"
"They are, but it's how they're feeling when they're paying that matters," Hikigaya explained.
"Um, feeling…? Like, the fish cake from Kibun Foods?" skeptically murmured Isshiki.
Not understanding, Isshiki latched on to the name of a business, since she most likely associated the word "feeling" or "kibun" with that particular company. After eyeing Hikigaya as if he was a slimy fish, Isshiki turned to me, hopeful for clarification.
"Basically… Hikigaya-kun is talking about psychological barriers and perceived value, right?" I spoke.
Investment was more associated with gain of value and purchases were more associated with losses and expenses.
"Well, you could say that," said a nodding Hikigaya, "To make it easier to understand, it's like the difference between using an iTunes card and a credit card in mobile apps."
Still confused, Isshiki spoke, "That's just harder to understand…"
I clarified for Hikigaya, "It's a problem with how we perceive spending cash versus digital money. There are people who are less resistant to making online payments and using credit cards instead of physical money, right?"
The iTunes card could be considered physical money, since one could go to a store and exchange physical coins and bills for the card. The card had a stored value equal to the amount it was purchased for — which was analogous to the feelings of limitations of physical currency. Both the card and physical money could be depleted in value to zero, with the physical money being more visibly striking. That would result in the purchasing habits of an iTunes cardholder to be more careful. On the other hand, credit cards did not result in an immediate feeling of loss. Even though it had to be paid of later, in the heat of the moment, one might even treat it as a limitless source of money. That would render the purchasing habits of a credit card holder to be looser. It seemed like a naïve difference, but people's purchasing habits, especially impulsive ones, were driven by their own wants, which didn't have to be rational.
Isshiki groaned, still unable to see the point.
This time, it was Tamanawa's turn to interject. He twirled his hands like pinwheels. His brow slightly twitched from the air currents generated by his finger-propellers.
"The merits of CF go beyond those aspects, though. A prominent one is perception of being an investor or a backer. In that respect, patrons are more analogous to collaborators than to clients. In other words, the awareness that they are collaborating will make them more accepting of a standard admission fee."
It was another well-worded explanation from Tamanawa. Essentially, people were more willing to part with their money if they perceived it as a seed to sprout something worthwhile or to become a part of a cause. Even if they were to partake of the product in the end, it was better to diminish their view of the loss of money as an expense.
"Uh-huh," said Isshiki with narrowed eyes.
After all of our explanations, Isshiki still failed to grasped the concept of crowdfunding and lost interest. I wanted to lecture her about the importance of accumulating knowledge, but that was something for another time. I pushed our discussion back on track.
"That leaves us with the problem of providing returns for their investments…" I pondered, "Admission to the prom can be the bare minimum, but we'll need to provide larger rewards for bigger investments…"
On popular crowdfunding websites, different levels of contributions provided different levels of rewards. This provided another kind of incentive. It would be even better if the reward being provided enhanced the enjoyment the investors would eventually get out of the product.
"Oh, I know! How about something like this?" exclaimed Orimoto, "We can have a limo to pick them up or something? You know, those instagrammable ones! That sounds super nice, right?"
A cheer of agreement came from Isshiki.
"Oh, it does! It's like being a bachelor."
"We can make the arrangements, but it'll be difficult to ascertain whether the extra costs will keep us out of the red," I murmured.
The cost of hiring limos was not trivial, so having the students footing the cost of the limos plus the extra profit needed to fund the rest of the prom would be difficult to justify to them. We needed another push.
Sure enough, Hikigaya weighed in with his own suggestions.
"The parking lot… Let's add the right to use it as a reward."
Hikigaya raised up a document with a map. He pointed at the directions to the car park.
"We're talking about recently graduated students, so I'm sure a lot of them want to come by car," he added.
"Ahh… something like having your boyfriend come to pick you up, right?" inquired Isshiki.
Nodding, Hikigaya spoke, "There's probably some demand for that kind of thing. Either way, we won't be able to reserve the lot for everybody, so we'll have to limit it to the bigger patrons."
For several of the students, owning and driving a car was a rite of passage, even in a country where public transit was readily available. We did not need to look at demographic data; that was just common sense. Thus, there definitely existed some demand for parking spaces.
The demand for something could be increased by scarcity. The scramble to obtain something scarce implied to consumers that the good or service was valuable. Scarcity could come in several different forms. There was material scarcity, which did apply to the limited physical space of the lot. There was also scarcity due to difficulty in obtaining the product. We could price a parking space highly in order to increase the monetary difficulty in attaining it (which would also add the element of conspicuous consumption). Scarcity was a powerful card to play to drive up the price of a product, when you had the marketing and reputation to back it up. One needed to look no further than the wine industry for excellent examples. Of course, if you artificially induced scarcity, you would begin skirting the ethical line.
Hikigaya continued, "One more thing we can do is designate one of the waiting rooms as a VIP room and make that another reward. This way, we can add more value without incurring additional costs."
As if he had read my mind, Hikigaya made questionable suggestions.
"You really would make for an amazing scam artist…" I sighed before sighing.
Although, none of the wryly smiling people around him made any effort to disapprove of his suggestions.
"I wouldn't say that," hurriedly spoke Hikigaya, "I'm just really bad at math, that's all… I really don't know how our expenses will look in the end."
"You can leave that to me," I said as I jotted down the ideas, "At any rate, let's proceed and have the limousines and other gaudy matters on the table."
Nothing was ever easy, and no one had ever demanded that we play fair. If we considered each other's suggestions, stopped ourselves from crossing certain lines, and did what was feasible, we should have a good chance. The ideal solution was often not possible, and we often had to wade through mud. Even so, the burden was bearable if everyone took their share of it.
Hikigaya spoke to Tamanawa, "All right, we'll leave the rest of the details to you, then. We'll probably need more rewards, so can you take care of that, too?"
Like a scam artist, Hikigaya sweet-talked Tamanawa to push as much responsibility as possible onto him. It was like second-nature to Hikigaya. I supposed that, compared to negotiating with my mother, Tamanawa was but a child.
Tamanawa quickly folded with a nervous smile.
"O-Of course…"
His mutterings did not instill anyone with confidence, but that was, nonetheless, his role in our plan.
Since the last time I met with Tamanawa, he seemed significantly more responsible and mature. Although he still loved to experiment with centripetal forces with his hands and recall words from the glossary of a business textbook, he seemed more willing to contribute. He no longer pranced around with nonsensical phrases to pretend to do work. He evaluated our plan with a critical eye and gave feedback to our suggestions. I would allow myself to have some trust in him.
I glanced at each of the meeting participants. No one had anything else to add.
"If there's nothing else, we'll send you the quotes and an estimated balance sheet," I spoke to the Kaihin Sogo students, "Can you contact us once you have the details finalized on your end?"
"Roger that!" shouted Orimoto.
Tamanawa responded, "We'll try to join you in the preparations within a few days."
With that, we had successfully assigned the responsibility of the budget to Kaihin Sogo. The Sobu side's main responsibility will be attracting guests. Of course, both sides will need to find enough staff to make our very large-scale event a success.
We bade our farewells. Tamanawa gallantly stood up and left the room with an air of satisfaction. With the end of the negotiation, both sides managed to get mostly what they desired, with as few compromises or losses as possible. Of course, Tamanawa's needs weren't nearly as dire as ours, since Kaihin Sogo was mostly alongside us for the ride (and their pile of cash), so the excitement of the joint prom itself provided large enough incentive for him. Orimoto carefreely chased after him.
Hikigaya breathed a sigh of relief and spoke, "Looks like the budget's more or less figured out."
"That's only if the crowdfunding goes well… what should we do if we don't have enough?" I questioned.
I threw that thought into the open, but I hoped that it wouldn't come to that. I wanted to have a bit of faith in this new-leaf Tamanawa.
With a grave frown, Isshiki replied, "Well, if we're off just by a little, and I mean, very little, the student council can maybe, just maybe, cover some of the costs if we really have to…"
I gave my own frown. It had not been that long ago since I last laid eyes on the student council's remaining funds. Suffice to say, I didn't blame Isshiki for not taking her student council members out for a final get-together. The only saving grace was that the amount they could contribute was small enough to be slipped under the table.
With difficulty, Hikigaya spoke, "I don't think I've heard anything more unreliable than that… Anyway, it depends on how much, but in the worst-case scenario, I can cover it with my own personal funds."
He threw his hands up in resignation.
"Even though you don't have any savings?" I spoke in bewilderment.
"I might not have any, but my parents do," he replied, "I'll get an interest-free loan from them and default on it. I'm that resourceful."
"I'm not really sure you can call that resourceful…" I murmured.
It was not resourceful. It was not even shrewd. It was more like criminal.
I was not entirely, cold-hearted, however. If Hikigaya was willing to foot the bill, then I would try to find some way to lower our expenses. I took out a calculator and made a few rough calculations.
"Try not to reduce my labour costs at least, okay?" begged Hikigaya.
Shaking my head, I reassured him, "Don't worry, that's been zero since the beginning, so there's nothing to reduce."
"What a wonderful workplace…" he spoke with astonishment.
Our usual banter was let loose as haphazardly as ever. We smirked at each other with the same, long-time shamelessness.
Isshiki sighed. The two of us turned to her. She rested her cheek on the palm of her hand.
"You two sure are close… but I'm going to ask just in case. What kind of relationship are you two going to have exactly?" she frigidly asked.
Hikigaya and I froze. She posited to us a question that was difficult for me to answer.
It was an unwritten agreement between Hikigaya and I to remain silent about our relationship. We were simply not the type to flaunt. Also, I wanted to avoid situations like this that caused my mind to lock up.
Of course, someone like Isshiki would be able to tell that our behaviour was slightly off, even though we tried to act as normal as possible.
Isshiki inched herself closer, urging us to spill the beans. Hikigaya and I glanced at each other, trying to find in the other some words to say, though we both turned up with nothing.
"Wh-What exactly, indeed…" stuttered Hikigaya.
Isshiki's eyes gained a threatening glint, unsatisfied with that non-answer. I hurriedly spoke up.
"Th-This is difficult to explain, but…"
Not strangers, not acquaintances, not friends, not— I was not ready to pursue that line of thought. Think. What described two people who were very close and agreed to share in everything?
"I suppose we're something like… p-partners?"
Even though I managed to sidestep that common word with something vague, my cheeks flared up nonetheless.
"That's it!" hurriedly agreed Hikigaya, "Well, you know, when you ask us outright like that, I'm not really sure how to answer, but it's probably something along those lines."
Nodding repeatedly, I spoke, "Th-That's true. I'm not entirely sure either, but I'm sure it's something along those lines."
Isshiki continued glaring at us with skepticism. Every time our eyes met, I felt like I wanted to shrink away. Then, she sighed in resignation.
"Huh, right. Well, if that's good enough for you two, then okay."
Isshiki stared at us with dissatisfaction, as if we were two problem children. If that was what she thought, then it would not be in inaccurate assessment. It would be a fool's errand to have us live up to expectations of normalcy, after all.
Isshiki grinned at us widely.
"But I think it'd be better if you made it clearer than that, though," she soothingly spoke.
I averted my eyes.
Isshiki was not wrong. It would better to make an explicit declaration. Several of our acquaintances would not know how to act unless we made things clear. Hikigaya and I would, ourselves, benefit from firmly acknowledging where we stood with each other.
There were times in the past where our inability to communicate caused us to fall away. To remain close, we had to speak with each other, as best as we could. We would not have a single clue about what each of us were thinking unless we made the attempt to communicate.
With the meeting adjourned, Isshiki stood up from her seat. She started to walk to the door, but she suddenly stopped in her tracks.
Heading towards us was Miura Yumiko. She played with her golden ringlets, wrapping them around her finger. She had a pompous frown, almost as if she was forcing herself. She exhaled exaggeratedly, and she glanced at Isshiki, Hikigaya and me in turn.
"Do you mind if we grab something to eat?" she nonchalantly asked.
Surprised, I answered, "N-No."
For some reason, Miura watched Hikigaya and I like a detective. She did not bother asking Hikigaya's approval (perhaps mine was enough). Instead, she turned her attention to Isshiki.
"You want to come too?"
She used the same unamused tone, but it was by no means inimical. The two of them weren't exactly good friends, so this could be considered a relatively amicable exchange.
"Wha? Uh, well, I don't know about that…"
Isshiki must have been bewildered by the unthreatening exchange as she muttered something ambiguous instead of a solid approval or disapproval.
Miura exchanged a glance with Hikigaya. This served to agitate him, but he did not shake his head or back away. Miura turned back to Isshiki. Standing stock-still, Miura tilted her head to beckon Isshiki for a response. Having played her cards, it would look terrible for Isshiki to refuse now.
With more resignation than reluctance, Isshiki spoke, "Well… I'm a little hungry, so I guess I can tag along."
"Mm."
Miura nodded. Then, she wordlessly turned and made her way to the door. The way she carried herself was somewhat like a model but mostly like a queen. Isshiki chased after her as that confident back would not tolerate an unhonoured declaration.
I was a little baffled at Miura's mildly off-putting attitude. Technically she did invite us to go eat with her, but her attitude clashed with that.
When I glanced at Hikigaya, he was making a warm smile. I turned to where he was looking at.
Our whole group was gathered at the door. Whether it was Yuigahama, Kawasaki, Ebina, or the three boys who were acquainted with Hikigaya, they were all discussing where they wanted to go to eat. When Miura arrived, she asked if they had settled on anything.
There were some discomforts, but they decided on a place that they would all be satisfied with.
Miura was unable to be frank, whether or not that was intentional. Maybe it was awkwardness, or maybe it was to put on a positive sort of pressure. But that was her own way of communicating, and she had managed to get everyone together.
It was not easy to understand. I was convinced that, for some things, I would never reach a full understanding. However, by continuously interacting and continuously grappling with each other, we would reach a place that was previously unfathomable.
The proof was right next to me.
"Why don't we go get something to eat, too?" I spoke.
"Good idea…" Hikigaya returned with a fatigued smile.
We rose from our seats. We hurried along to join Miura and the others.
Our work became busier bit by bit as the days passed. The saving grace was that I was able to speak with Yuigahama about mundane things along the way, which we had no opportunities to do the last time. It was one of the few things that I was grateful for, in exchange for holding this haphazard event.
However, the growth in busyness was not linear. The venue afforded us two days of reservation, one to prepare and one to hold our event. The reality of our limited time creeped up our bodies like a crawling spider as the deadline drew closer. This had the effect of making us take our work more seriously. We discovered issues where we hadn't noticed before and sought to rectify them. How much blood, sweat and tears we poured into the event increased exponentially by the day.
To pour oil in the fire, out work environment also became less hospitable. Spring awakened the sun. The sun shone through the windows of the community centre, which had less-than-ideal ventilation. Thus, the environment became hot and stuffy. The lukewarm energy drink in my hand hardly served as coolant for my body. I even feared that the sugar being digested by my body would generate more heat from the process than would be alleviated by the beverage.
I had become tired. The endless documents being displayed on my laptop's screen seem to meld together, turning into a sea of white and black. I've had to trim my already short nails even shorter to avert the irritating feeling of nails colliding against keys, something that occurred tens of thousands of times per day.
"Sure is hot…" grunted Hikigaya, "Time to call it a day and go home."
He repeatedly flapped the collar of his shirt, pulling it out and pushing it back in, to ventilate himself. I frowned when I noticed that his sweat had turned parts of his white shirt translucent.
"Didn't you go home the past two days? Are you planning on going home today, too?" I croaked, with a parched throat.
He languidly replied, "Is there something wrong with going home everyday? I still have a place I can go home to, and nothing could make me happier."
My ridiculous request for him to work for 24 hours per day was met by his ridiculously war-torn response. This was evidence that our brains were already fried.
"Well… it looks like you're taking your back work with you, so I can't really complain."
He had been sneaking in several hours of unpaid overtime (on top of his unpaid work), and I wasn't able to stop him because of how desperately we needed work to be done.
"Wait, you're doing the same thing, aren't you?" he lashed back, "Anyway, give me some of your work before you hit your limit."
He was not incorrect. I had been taking this laptop home with me every night. The bin of empty energy drink cans next to us was as full as the bin I had at home.
I felt dizzy, and my stomach began feeling strange. I was unable to hide it. Hikigaya was right. I was approaching my limit.
"Okay…" I muttered, hanging my head.
"Um, 'okay…?' You okay? Things are looking kinda bad, aren't they?" he said, looking at me with concern.
I struggled to reply, "Yes, they are. I honestly don't know if we're going to make it. This is bad. I could die a little."
My mind was so hammered that I muttered a phrase that was out-of-universe. I could recognize the tone of my own voice being unnaturally hoarse. My vision became a little blurred — though that was because my glasses were slipping from my face. This was definitely bad. I had to continue working, but my body was going to shut down.
"Yukinon, I'll take this."
Yuigahama suddenly appeared. She swiped away a document from my table that I had my eye on. She took a few other papers as well. Before I could say a word, she marched back to her own station.
"Oh, then, I'll take this."
Isshiki materialized, did the same thing as Yuigahama, and left. When I glanced back at my table, the pile of work I had remaining had been reduced to half.
"Hachiman, material supplies are running low."
One of Hikigaya's acquaintances pulled Hikigaya away to talk to him. I struggled to recall his name precisely. It was Zai-something? He was the one on the larger side, with a peculiar way of speaking. Although he looked untrustworthy, he was working as hard as everyone else, as was made evident by the nails being held by his teeth and the hammer in his hand. Overhearing bits and pieces of their conversation, it seemed that they planned to go to MrMax for more supplies.
I took a moment to rest. Surveying the room, everyone was knee-deep in their own tasks. Like the peculiarly-speaking large individual (who was speaking with Hikigaya), a lot of the boys were in charge of the physical labour, assembling signages and other equipment. Others, like Yuigahama and Isshiki, handled the logistics, which involved not only filling out documents but calling the appropriate parties to make arrangements. Tamanawa, Hayama, Kawasaki, and many more steadily worked along. If I had described the scale of preparations for our first prom in hyperboles, the same descriptions could be applied to our current preparations but taken literally.
I gathered my thoughts. Staring at the clock, I organized the remaining tasks and timeline in my head. If we proceeded as is, we would might just barely make it time. A dizzying amount of preparation would have to be last minute, and I might have to pull off one last all-nighter. It was doable, though at a great bodily cost.
Of course, all of that was assuming that I was able to move my body. Since entering a state of rest, it became difficult to take myself out of it. My mind and body would not respond.
"It's almost time to eat, after all. Right? Right?"
Isshiki loudly spoke, catching my attention. She was standing between Hikigaya and Zai-something, seeming rather energetic. She launched a blow with her fist against Hikigaya's side. He recoiled from the horseplay, looking more exasperated than injured.
"It's that time already, huh…?" I murmured.
I wearily sighed. I had nearly forgotten about eating. Perhaps that was one reason why I could barely move at the moment.
"Let's have a meal break, then. Can you bring something back after you finish your shopping?" I asked Hikigaya.
"Yeah… Wait, no, that's not happening, because it's going to take awhile," he stated.
He initially spoke absentmindedly but quickly transitioned to a firm refusal.
"Why?" I spoke with confusion.
"Because… we're going to the sauna," he insisted.
"Huh?" I spat.
He smirked, proud of his own suggestion. I failed to retort at his absurdity because I was so bewildered at his out-of-place suggestion. "This was not the right time or place" was what I should be telling him.
Because of my mistake, I also failed to stop him from spiraling into one of his usual, long-winded explanations.
"All right, listen up. It's important for us to go because it's part of our job. By bathing in a sauna, we're able to condition our disordered autonomic nerves and relax our bodies, allowing us to work more efficiently…"
Unknowingly or not, he leaned closer to me as his speech went on with increasing fervor. By the time his nonsensical rambling was finished, he was only a couple inches away from my face, wearing an intimidating, fanatical look.
"…If anything, they're a necessary expense that should be paid for. I'll go get a blank invoice so tell me who to write it to."
"O-Oh…" I meekly spoke.
I uncomfortably shrank back. However, I was the only one feeling uncomfortable. All of the boys around us, whether they were from Sobu or Kaihin, had overheard Hikigaya's loudly spoken suggestion and were excitedly chatting amongst themselves. Isshiki did not speak up in rejection; she only nodded in approval. Before long, most of the people stood up and headed to the door.
I pressed three fingers against my temple. With so many people wanting to go to the sauna, I had no choice but to allow it.
Perhaps this was Hikigaya's plan. He was forcibly evicting me from this room. Had I been left to my own devices, I would have continued pushing myself. He knew me well; I would only leave the room if he created a situation where I had no choice but to leave. That was his own way of showing consideration, a necessary tactic aimed at someone as stubborn as myself.
I turned to Hikigaya and asked him, "Let's take a break, then. Do you mind giving me the address of that place just in case?"
Among all of us, we quickly reached a consensus on our plan for our break. First, we would go to the sauna at Yukemori Yokocho. After that, we would have dinner at Surprised Donkey. There wasn't any of the awkwardness from the first day; Miura didn't need to ungently nudge us along. By now, everyone got the hang of working with each other, and we were far more interested in relaxing our tired bones and filling our empty stomachs than introducing unnecessary drama.
As a very large group, we marched to Yukemori Yokocho. Interestingly, we occupied much of the sidewalk, and it was the strangers who avoided us rather than the other way around. While I've seen plenty of unfamiliar faces around the community centre these past few days, it was not until I witnessed everyone packed together that it struck me just how massive of a gathering that we had assembled. The majority of the people the Service Club trusted in were present, along with another school to boot.
"…And I thought I was supposed to be the reckless one," murmured a dizzied Isshiki, peering around, "And it's super weird how having extra people to help didn't decrease our workload. If anything, we have even more things to worry about!"
"I do apologize," I spoke to Isshiki, "Though this could count as the finest moment of your first year as student council president, no?"
"Ahaha, it is literally twice as big this time," cheerily spoke Yuigahama.
When we arrived at the sauna, we split up into several groups and went into different rooms.
I was the first of my own group to enter. The instant I opened the door, I was smashed with a blast of hot air.
I navigated around the hot rocks and sat on the wooden bench. I instantly felt the hotness run through the lower half of my body.
I sweated. When I did fierce physical activity for long periods of time, I sweated enough to feel droplets of sweat run down my skin. I had reached that state in a fraction of that time just by sitting here. My heart was beating as fast as if I had run a marathon.
Saunas were supposed to help one relax. After acclimating as much as I could, I did somewhat get the feeling of relaxing in a hot tub, though with much greater intensity. My head began feeling a bit light. I hoped that was a sign of relaxation and not anything dangerous.
The others had come into the room after I did and had settled in.
To the right of me was Yuigahama. Wrapped in nothing but a towel, she stretched her arms and massaged her shoulders. Her cheeks were fairly flushed from the heat, which actually made her look healthier.
"Aaahhh, these days everything feels so… heavy. But it's so good to let loose and relax like this!" exclaimed Yuigahama.
She gave me a captivating smile. She was genuinely happy to be temporarily free of the endless work, a burdensome yolk on us all. Though, I had to wonder, what, exactly, was particularly heavy?
I turned my attention to my left. Sitting there, as petite as a fairy, was Isshiki. She had her eyes closed and leaned back while gripping the edge of the bench. Unlike her usual chatty behaviour, she was completely silent as she soaked in the heat of the sauna. She focused fully on rejuvenation.
I was unable to estimate how much endurance Isshiki possessed, but anyone would feel fatigued after preparing for a prom, holding a prom, cleaning up after a prom, followed by preparing for another prom. I was thankful for her persistence, but I was also a little concerned about her ambitions. Who knew what absurdities were in store for us next year?
On the other side of the rocks were three others.
The first one was Kawasaki. Her long, slender legs peeked out from the towel wrapping around her lean body. The opportunities I got to see her with little to no clothes on was quite infrequent, so I was treated to quite an intriguing sight. Her signature lengthy ponytail was draped on the bench. While Kawasaki was usually quite the cool person, in every sense of the word, today, she was slumped forward, clutching onto her knees, with a wearied expression. Occasionally, she would steal furtive glances in my direction for an unknown reason, though we wouldn't ever make eye contact. While the work may have played a role in her unease, there was another, major reason.
Sitting next to Kawasaki was Ebina. There was a common trope in fiction where a character who usually wore glasses looked entirely different and potentially more attractive with their glasses off. I wouldn't go that far with today's glasses-less Ebina, but she somehow gave off a different impression. The Ebina without glasses looked relatively normal, for the lack of a better term. Previously, her usual round lenses with red frames made her look bewitching, in the "witch" sense. Perhaps it invoked certain stereotypes regarding people who spent grossly long hours absorbed into unhealthy reading materials, or maybe the bit of reflectiveness partially obscured the sight of her eyes to make her seem more enigmatic. Without her glasses, she looked plainer, in the wholesome sense, like freshly baked bread. Of course, that was speaking purely of her facial characteristics. Unfortunately, even in the sauna, she enjoyed pestering Kawasaki, giving her a wicked grin. Excessive sweat gave a slight sheen to the skins of Kawasaki and Ebina due to Ebina's repetitive, unwarranted, and heat-generating physical contact.
Finally, next to Ebina was Miura. She sat regally. She had one of the most impressively natural display of crossed legs I had ever seen. It was as if she was born to be grandiose, to be flashy and domineering. In this aspect alone, I believe she may have even surpassed my sister. Her ringlets danced as she fanned herself with her hand — those this endeavour was quickly ceased with a grimace when she discovered that she was sending hot air into her face. She chatted with Yuigahama from across the rocks. Miura was quite dynamic. In addition to nods and facial expressions, she made motions with her hands and leaned her body in several directions. Her body language served to double the presence she emanated. It made me feel a little small (but obviously not to the point of inferiority).
My long hair covered the back of my neck and a decent portion of my back like curtains. Unfortunately, that served to insulate and heat up the parts of my body that were especially vulnerable. I attempted to gather up my hair and drape it over one shoulder to limit the coverage.
I looked to Yuigahama. As always, her hair was bundled up into a neat bun.
"I should've tied up my hair like you…" I muttered.
"It would be cool to have the same hairstyle as you, though it would also be a little awkward," said Yuigahama with a careful smile, "Though, I think you'll look good with any style!"
"Looking good… now there's an understatement!" exclaimed a voice on my other side.
I felt a gentle tug on my elbow. Then, fingers started running along my upper arm, making me feel a little ticklish.
"What exactly are you doing, Isshiki-san?" I condescendingly asked.
Pouting, Isshiki replied, "It's not just the hair! Your skin is so pale and smooth. Every part of you is just so slim, fragile and perfect. And when you're looking at me so scarily like that, you actually look super mature!"
"I think I'm supposed to feel embarrassed or angry, but I just feel tired," I said before sighing, "It must be the heat that's affecting me."
From my right side, my arm was pressed against the roughness of a towel, as well as something far softer.
"There's also this part about Yukinon where she gently tries to push you away, but then you squeeze even harder. That little bit of resistance is really cute. Like playing with a cat, you know?"
I pondered, "Hmm, w-when you put it like that… But that's a bit off, actually."
At least from my experience, cats tend to escalate your play and claw black. Put another way, you've given them the OK for rougher play. I wouldn't recommend it to beginners. I've seen it put people off cats for good. What I do recommend is to gently rub every part of their head but without an excess of focus on any single area. They'll easily purr, and they'll eventually start rubbing their head against your hand. If they really like you, they will initiate the rubbing on their own, even if you don't move a muscle.
Anyway, it was extremely hot. The touching and grasping on either side of me increased the temperature even further. I was both relaxed and exhausted, or maybe exhaustion gave way to relaxation. Either way, as much as I would like to, I couldn't bring myself to move, so I let myself be felt and held on to.
From across the rocks, a startled Miura stared at me as if I was some sort of ghoul. I found the strength to shrug, communicating to her that all was part and parcel.
It could have been worse, I told myself. At least I was in a relaxed state and not involved in some sort of competition, the stress of which would have heated myself up even further.
"So hot, hehehe… But what about the intertwining of flesh on the men's side? Huffing and puffing in the sauna heat and the chaffing of skin, the suspension bridge effect would throttle upwards and explooooooode!"
A jaw-droppingly terrible statement was exclaimed from the non-glasses wearing girl on the other side as she suddenly stood up and thrust her arms into the air. It was unfortunate that Miura wasn't able to restrain her in time. As a result, all of our eyes were forced in her direction.
Then, Ebina pointed her finger at me.
"But there is hotness in here too! You, over there, what gives you the right to make every day so hot!?" she shouted at me.
"I'm sorry?" I spoke in bewilderment.
Miura glared at me. Kawasaki was nervously rubbing her slender legs together as she peered at me. From beside me, Isshiki grinned like a cat. Yuigahama gave me a lonely smile.
The room fell to silence.
An increased amount of sweat poured down my back, adding on to the sweat that was already there. I was duller than the rest when it came to interpreting social cues, but even I was able to predict that something bad would happen.
"We're slaving away everyday, but it gets really uncomfortable when Hikitani-kun keeps pampering you. Must be nice to be dating someone… But wait! Watching from a distance as a couple does what a couple does— my goodness! I'm unlocking new gates!"
Ebina wriggled her body around like a worm.
I shot up from my seat.
"Ah— wait, so everyone knew?" I hesitantly asked the room.
Several poker faces blinked repeatedly in my direction. Their lack of a reaction was a confirmation in the worst sense. It was as if they were admonishing me for expecting otherwise.
So it was that obvious after all…
I sunk back down to the bench. I wanted to bury my head under the rocks in the middle of the room. I hung my head and stared at the floor.
"Saki-Saki, go!"
"W-Wait, what—"
With the ruffling of towels and a few pitter patters, a pair of feet entered my vision. I looked up. In front of me was an extremely nervous Kawasaki.
"U-Uh, um…" started Kawasaki.
She had been inadvertently put on the spot by Ebina, though I was also sharing in her misfortunate limelight.
A strange kind of tension tugged in my chest. I felt like I had to apologize for some reason, but I stayed silent as Kawasaki seemed like she had something to say.
"I… I think it's good if things have a proper beginning and end, so… I've seen enough to be convinced, so… I think that—"
Suddenly, Kawasaki raised her voice.
"I-It's your responsibility to t-take care of each other!"
"Y-Yes?" I said as I tilted my head.
After she finished saying her piece, she flew out the sauna room. I tilted my head even further.
"Saki… An ending…" murmured Yuigahama.
"Hmmhmm, very good," said a pleased Ebina as she nodded to herself.
In high spirits, Ebina marched out of the room as well, presumably to bother Kawasaki some more.
I naturally turned my head towards Miura. Usually, Miura would step in to put a stop to Ebina's antics, but she was strangely complacent today. Even more unusual was that, despite her perpetual frowning, she had the air of one who was amused.
"Hmm, I think I will get out as well," said Miura.
As Miura stood up, her golden ringlets jiggled. From across the rocks, she looked over at me. I tilted my head upwards to meet her piercing gaze.
While twirling a lock of her hair around her finger, Miura spoke to me, "I don't feel like stuffing myself in here anymore. If you get out of here faster, you can meet with him… meet with the others sooner."
Unbeknownst to herself, Miura flashed me an excited smile, even though the rest of her body was poised as assertively as ever. She did not mean harm, but it seemed like she was rejoicing about something involving herself, rather than being happy to lend me some soothing words.
She slowly made her way to the door. Perhaps due to feeling a bit faint, the towel that was wrapped around her body fell halfway down on the posterior side, revealing her delicate back. With her model-like physique, it did not require having a bizarre fetish to note how sensual the sight was.
Presumably having noticed my stare, she whipped her head back towards me. Her cheeks were tinged red, and her lips were pursed. She hurriedly fixed her towel. She quickened her steps towards the door and disappeared from the room.
Yuigahama, Isshiki and I were the remaining people.
They continued to sit, with no intention of standing. Even though Isshiki's skin started to get flushed and Yuigahama began discomfortingly shifting positions, they remained with me. Perhaps they were watching over me, since I had the tendency to overdo things. Alternatively, they were trying to share in my heated burden, despite the impossibility.
Everyone had their own responses to the heat in this room. One single factor had a rippling effect, significant enough to evoke a diversity of actions. How much more interesting would things be if a second or third factor was introduced? It was unimaginable what would occur with a hundred or a thousand factors.
It had been a year since I had nothing but the zero-ness of loneliness. Looking back, it was arrogant of me to think that my two tiny hands alone could achieve anything more than futility. That's why he, who despite always claiming to be alone, always involved others, even if not in entirely friendly ways.
If one, one-hundred or one-thousand was already this grand, then the infinity of "everything" was definitely something miraculous.
I stood up. I had reached my limit. It would not do to be stubborn and remain, lest I overburden the ones around me. As the ones who have left have told me, there were others whom we ought to reconvene with.
"Yuigahama, Isshiki, we should leave as well."
They looked up at me with relieved expressions.
After we had our fill of the facilities, we left. As expected, evening time and dinner time had fallen. The skies had turned to the colour of egg yolk (of the orange variety of course), and the half-yolk sun was poaching on the shimmering horizon of the sea. With rumbling stomachs, most of the group headed immediately to Surprised Donkey.
Though, not everyone had exited the facilities quite yet. The number one enjoyer of saunas in Shiba (and the number one enjoyer of all other activities in Shiba) had decided to take extra time streaming himself, or so I've been told. To not leave him behind, Yuigahama, Isshiki and I sat on a bench just outside of the door.
To the right of me was Yuigahama, and to her right was Isshiki. None of us were reading a book or playing with a phone. We simply sat. Our warmed bodies basked in the cool air.
After a short wait, steady footsteps headed in our direction.
"Hikki," called out Yuigahama.
With a can of MAX Coffee in hand, he sauntered towards the bench. His cheeks were reddened, having spent an extended time inside. His usual gloominess was dispelled, and he seemed chipper. It was evident that he was true enthusiast of saunas.
Though, not everyone shared in his enthusiasm.
"Senpai, you're so slow," complained Isshiki.
She vocally let loose her displeasure, complemented with a scowl. Her mannerisms were exaggerated to the excess, so I suspected that it was somewhat forced. The proof was that she was sitting here on the bench with us. She did enjoy giving her senpai a few playful scratches, and he did not mind scratching back.
"Or maybe you three are just too fast?" he joked.
Hikigaya surveyed at the surroundings.
"Where's everyone else?" he asked.
I responded, "They already went to eat."
"I see," he briefly spoke.
Hikigaya turned his attention to his MAX Coffee. He vigorously gulped down his favourite beverage. He leaned against the wall adjacent to the bench.
With that, the conversation ended.
Then, there was peace. A tranquil gust breezed by. The regular whooshing of low-speed cars driving by us served as a largo metronome, steadily ticking the time by in slow beats. It was serene, just like those mundane days after school, lounging in the clubroom. I revelled in the heat of my body and heat of the body next to me, silently basking in each other's presence.
Isshiki began humming a familiar piece that we played during the first prom. It was a soothing piece. I was calmed by it, perhaps overly so. The combination of fatigue and relaxation caught up to me, now that I was idle. My eyelids became heavy, and my body tilted to the side. My head bobbed against Yuigahama's shoulder, and I would draw back each time. However, Yuigahama eventually leaned towards me to communicate to me her acquiescence. The final time I leaned my head against Yuigahama, I let myself indulge.
My eyelids alternated between fully shut and partially opened. The sunlit scene that would peek through was bright enough to keep me from becoming fully asleep. The warmth next to me made me feel like I belonged. The humming from beyond lightened my body. The gaze of the one who stood made me feel watched over.
If this was a dream, then I did not want to wake up. If this was serendipity, then I wanted to be lucky forever.
Winter had turned to spring, and the school calendar year will soon advance. Yesterday and today will soon be bygones of a matured self, just like how the me of today already pities the lonesome me of last year. Yet, it was through those vain struggles where I had found everlasting understanding, incomplete as it was.
"Ready to go?" asked Hikigaya.
His hands were now free. An empty can of MAX Coffee laid atop a bin of other cans.
Opening my eyes, I replied to him, "Sure…"
The time to advance to our next destination had come.
Separating from Yuigahama, I assumed a proper posture and straightened up my clothes. I thanked Yuigahama for letting me rest on her, and she shook her head.
"Yep… let's go," tenderly spoke Isshiki.
Not one to be left behind, Isshiki leapt to her feet. She was always keen to be seeking the next thrill. In this case, she was keen to fill her stomach.
"Okay, we should get going…" whispered Yuigahama.
She gazed up at the standing Hikigaya and Isshiki. Without another word, Isshiki began walking. Yuigahama hurriedly stood up and chased after Isshiki. The two of them did not look back towards the bench. They did not need to, for I would soon be joining them.
Hikigaya nodded to me, urging me to rise as well. After gathering my strength, I nodded to him. Before I could stand, his hand was presented to me.
"I can stand up on my own…" I declared.
Stubbornness left my lips automatically. It was not just a holdover from the times where I was imbued with thorns. It was ingrained into me and was something that would be difficult to change.
With a truant smile, Hikigaya stated, "I know."
The hand that was offered to me was superfluous. So too was our bickering. So too were his methods. So too were my feelings.
This, too, was something that had become had become difficult to change.
A person was born with one life. To be offered another, that was quite a bit extra, no? It gave unto me additional responsibility. Yet, it also gave additional meaning.
I took the hand of that morose knight attempting to wear shining armour.