Kono Suba: Short Stories

by Rustyboy

After dying a laughable and pathetic death on his way back from buying a game, high school student and recluse Kazuma Satou finds himself sitting before a beautiful but obnoxious goddess named Aqua. She provides the NEET with two options: continue on to heaven or reincarnate in every gamer's dream—a real fantasy world! Short Stories.

1. Chapter 1

Konosuba: Disappearance and the Return (Short Story) Part 1

Characters:

Kazuma

Aqua

Darkness

Megumin

000

What could Kazuma expect when it came to Magic. Oh sure he trusted Wiz, but with Aqua being there and being her usual self. Which meant that of course she would be able to screw up something simple. In a moment of being an idiot. She had somehow interfered with Wiz's spell and then bang he was basically screwed once more. Where he expected that the others arrived back at Axel, he was dropped off who knows where. Alone. "When I get home I will..." He was so frustrated that he could not think of a good punishment against Aqua. Well not yet anyhow. Looking around, he smiled. Sure he was out in the middle of nowhere. But it was not as bad as he first feared. Off in the distance he could just make out the roofs of a small village. Which meant he was not marooned as badly as he could be. Perhaps this was in a way a blessing, it would give him the opportunity to reevaluate those in his Party. Sure they were his friends and he cared about them a lot. Yes even Aqua. But he had to face reality. He could not keep coming up with plans where he kept dying and being resurrected over and over again. For one it hurt. It hurt a lot to die. Being beheaded by that Snow Shogun. Being vaporized by Hans the Slime. Having his neck broken. Then the last time being blasted by Megumin's and Yun Yun's Explosive Magic. How many more times was he going to be killed. That was the problem with those in his Party. He rather die then let anything happen to them. Entering the Village, he became the focus of attention from the couple of dozen Villagers. "Excuse me...how far am I from the City of Eris?" He asked one of them and he stared at him with confusion.

When Aqua, Megumin, Darkness and Wiz arrived in Axel. Wiz slumped and began to fade. Aqua had inadvertently cast a Purifying spell just as she had cast the Transportation Spell. Just because the Goddess had freaked out when a Zombie had suddenly popped out of the ground a meter from her. "Hey where is Kazuma?" Megumin asked and they all began to look about them. Realizing that he was nowhere in sight.

"Oh no. When Aqua cast that Purifying Spell...it must have...he could be anywhere." Wiz said still somewhat faded. She felt weak and with Vanir's help she was able to stand.

"We should look for him." Darkness said her voice laced with concern. "Though where do we look?" She asked suddenly remembering that the World was a bit place and if he could be anywhere. They could spend a lifetime searching for him. That concerned Darkness a lot. Without him around, her Father may loose his patience and begin once more to pressure her into marrying someone else. She had left her Father with the impression that she was eventually going to marry Kazuma. Especially since she told him that she was expecting Kazuma's child. Which was a lie, since they had not even had sex yet. "We need to find him before my Father discovers that he is missing." She said desperately. "Because if my Father finds out that he is gone...he will once more pressure me to select other suitors."

"I would help...but Aqua drained me...I need time to rest and recover." Wiz told them, weakly going inside her Shop. After a moment Vanir joined her, leaving Aqua, Megumin and Darkness alone. None of them knew where to start looking.

"I am not saying that we shouldn't search. But where would we start. I think it might be best we go home and maybe wait until Wiz can perhaps use her Magic to at least narrow down where he might be." Megumin suggested and the two others regretfully had to agree.

0

The nearest City that had transportation was twenty miles to the North. Kazuma found out that he was about two hundred miles from Axel. So to get back home he would have to walk to the City and then take a carriage the rest of the way. At most he figured it would take two days to walk to the City and then another four or five days to make it home. He began to wonder if his friends were worried about him. So he would have to send a message to them by Carrier Bird. Though he started to think that perhaps they would not be that concerned that he was not there. It seemed to him that the only times they wanted him around was to clean up some mess that they had gotten themselves in. Or when in a desperate situation they needed him to come up with a plan to get out of it. As he walked he noticed that the sun began to set, so he stepped off the road to set up camp. It would take another day before he reached the City of Arana. That was where he could send the message and then catch a Carriage. Then he would find out if he should have returned home or not. If not then he decided that he would sneak away and leave Axel forever. The next morning and on the road again, he made the decision that he would send a Message first and find out if he should return or not. Believing it to be best to learn first if they even wanted him to come back. So when he did reach the City and after finding where he could rent a Messenger Bird. He went to the Guild Hall to wait for the Bird to come back, before he would actually return to Axel.

AXEL:

Word that a Messenger Bird had arrived at the Guild had Darkness running with Megumin and Aqua right on her heels. Especially when they learned it was from Kazuma. Bursting through the door, she found Luna holding the message. Snatching it from her, Darkness read it then reread it. She gasped audibly as Megumin took the paper and read it herself. "What is he thinking? Of course we need him." The Youngest Girl in their Party said and Darkness shook her head.

"That was not what he means by that. We all have taken him for granted several times and never really thanked him." Darkness said sadly, realizing she had done it as well. He had not yet made that demand of her and it had been over two months, To top it off, she had never thanked him for aiding her to not only get out of the Marriage Proposal, but keeping her Father from insisting anymore that she get married. Believing that she was intending to marry Kazuma. Then there was the numerous times he had kept them safe, while he had died three times already. Once for her. The Winter Shogun would have killed her and not him if he had not pushed her down into the snow. Then before that he saved her from the Duhan and she never thanked him on either occasions. She never thanked him at all. "We never let him know how important he is to us..I never told him how important he is to me." She added just as sadly and Megumin lowered her gaze. Then nodded.

"You are right. None of us has, ever...No wonder he wrote this and none of us have really told him how important he is to any of us." Megumin felt tears sting her eyes.

"Sounds to me like he just is milking it. Of course we appreciate him, he knows that. I brought him back to life haven't I?" Aqua said and then picked up a piece of paper and a Quill. Preparing to write a message back.

"What are you going to write?" Darkness asked and Aqua smiled.

"That we are not falling for this guilt trip. That he needs to get his ass hack here. What else?" Aqua said and Darkness snatched the paper from her.

"No. I for one am going to write him the truth for once." Taking the Paper and Quill Darkness went over and sat down. Megumin and Aqua looked at each other then joined her.

"What do you mean? Write the truth for once." Megumin asked and Darkness closed her eyes. Then decided that they too needed to know the truth.

"That I...I need him to come back because I need him to come back." Darkness blushed, she could write what she wanted to say. But to actually say it out loud was too difficult. "That I need him for reasons I rather tell him face to face." Standing she ripped the paper in half. "His letter came from Arana...I am going to have Wiz send me there and I will do this actually face to face." Striding to the door, then noticed that Megumin and Aqua were following her. "I wish to do this alone. Fear not I shall bring him back home." She then left and made her way to Wiz's Shop and within ten minutes she was transported to the City of Arana.

00

Leaving the Guild, Kazama had screwed up again. He had changed his mind and had decided not to await word from the others. So he intended to get passage back home. But he had not realized that he had missed the Daily Caravan already and would have to wait until tomorrow for the next one. Before he could react, someone collided into him. Hugging him so tightly that it knocked the air out of him. He could tell who it was almost immediately, because she was much stronger then he was and she had blonde hair. "You are crushing me." He wheezed out and Darkness slowly reduced her grip on him. Then released him enough to slug him in the shoulder.

"What were you thinking!" Darkness growled angrily. "Sending a message that you do not believe you will return! Just because you feel you are not appreciated!" She said angrily and he saw it within her eyes. Desperation and sadness. He watched as some small tears streamed down her cheeks.

"Sorry Darkness..It just felt that way. Wait a minute..how did you get here so fast?" Kazuma asked and Darkness smiled slightly, though she was still upset.

"I had Wiz send me." Darkness said and he looked past her searching for Megumin and Aqua.

"Where are the others?" Kazuma asked and Darkness blushed.

"I came alone. I felt it was important that I convince you that you are important to us...to me." Darkness stated and grabbed him for another hug. "You are vastly important to...me and...it is not because we are in the same party." She lowered her gaze downward feeling even more embarrassed. His heart began to pound heavily in his chest as she reached down and took his hands in hers. "You are vastly important to me...because...I want you to...you still have not...demanded from our bet...what you wanted from me." Her voice was low and she could barely say the words. But she hoped that he understood. This time he blushed.

"I only said that to get you off balance...I never intended to.." Kazuma admitted and Darkness shook her head.

"I want you to make that demand...and I want it to involve..." Darkness looked about and then saw the Inn across the street. "Come with me." She released his left hand and then dragged him towards the Inn. Getting a room, she took him to it. Once inside the room, she began to remove her armor as he stared at her in shock. "This is the demand I know you want...because it is the one I want you to make." She said, then pulled him towards her. Kissing him hard. So hard that he tasted blood in his mouth. Now his heart was really pounding in his chest as she pushed him onto the bed, then joined him.

Laying on the bed hours upon hours later, Kazuma had no idea what time it was or how long they had been in the room and he really didn't care. What he did know was sex was awesome. Sex with Darkness was awesome beyond awesome. She had her head resting on his chest as she held him tightly against her. With her strong arms encircled around him and he had his around her. Both were panting heavily and he suspected that neither of them intended to get up anytime soon. "Kazuma...what you said while we were...did you mean it?" She asked and he smiled.

"Of course I meant it. I love you Darkness...I love you Lalatine. I never felt this way about anyone before and I hope that what I feel for you is indeed love, because it makes me feel like I could fly or dance in the street." Kazuma admitted and he wondered if he had said it right. She tightened her hold on him.

"Good...because I love you too. You know sex with you was much different then I expected. It was incredible..but it was not what I expected it to feel like. I get stimulated with being hit and in the throes of combat. But having sex with you felt much more satisfying. Am I making sense?" Darkness asked and Kazuma chuckled.

"Yes. Actually it makes perfect sense. I got to know..what now?" Kazuma asked and this time Darkness chuckled.

"You took the Daughter of a Noble to bed and had your way with her. What do you think must happen now? What do you think my Father will do?" Darkness asked and Kazuma paled. Wondering if he was about to be threatened with execution again.

"Wait a minute...you...you...the first time was all you." Kazuma said slightly panicking and Darkness still chuckled.

"Who do you think my Father will believe? You or me?" Darkness said smirking and Kazuma groaned. "Though there is a simple solution...there is a Church of Eris right down the street. All you got to do is go with me to the Church and Marry me." She told him and he smiled broadly.

"I do not have a problem with that." Kazuma said and Darkness kissed him again.

0

Two days later, the first thing the Couple did was send another Messenger Bird to their Friends. The second thing they did was book all the seats on one of the Carriages. Fully intending to be alone on the long trip. Six other Carriages were part of the Caravan and they were in the last one. Leaning back against her newlywed husband's chest and with his arms nicely around in front of her, Darkness felt happy. Happier then she expected to be. "So Mrs Crusader...you did not put in the message to Aqua and Megumin about this did you?" Kazuma asked and she shook her head.

"No. I rather surprise Aqua and Megumin." Darkness replied closing her eyes and feeling too content to even want to move. Not telling him that Megumin might not take it well. She had a feeling deep within her that the Explosion Mage had a serious crush on Kazuma. That was one of the reasons she made her move now and not later. There had been a subtle change between Kazuma and Megumin ever since they had returned from her Village of the Crimson Demons and she suspected that the younger Girl was close to making her own move. So she was just waiting for this type of situation to arise, so she could do it first. Now it was too late for Megumin. Kazuma Satou was hers, now and forever. For in the Church of Eris, there was no divorce.

"You do not expect me to treat you like what you said you wanted back at your Father's Castle do you? Where I seek out other Girls, cheat on you and also treat you like...well like shit? Because I do not think I can." Kazuma asked and Darkness shook her head.

"No not at all. I was actually somewhat describing you as the one I was attracted to. I sort of exaggerated your personality a lot when I described the perfect match for me. I actually hope that I am more then enough for you and that you treat me like what I am to you. A loving wife that does love you." Darkness replied and Kazuma nodded.

"I can do that easily." Kazuma then felt a hand move along his right thigh and touch his crotch. "Darkness...we can't do that...not with the driver right there." He gasped out as he felt her hand caress his junk. She smiled at him seductively. He had almost forgotten that it did not take much to get Darkness aroused. He smiled himself thinking that it might be fun to be married to her.

"Awww...come on kazuma...I am sure if we ask...he won't look." Darkness whispered as she leaned her head back and licked his ear. Causing him to shudder.

"You are going to have to wait until we stop for the night and then only if you behave yourself." Kazuma said and Darkness giggled, actually giggled which threw him off somewhat to hear her do that.

"If I do..then you better...otherwise I may have to force you. Or even better you might have to force me." Darkness then went back to leaning against him. She found it nice that they could tease each other now. Believing it was because now they were comfortable enough to do that with each other. Perhaps that is what she felt she had been missing. Having a connection with him other then being on the same party and being friends.

000

It took three more days before the Carriage meant for Axel to reach the City, it and two others made three other stops on the way and picked up one more in route. Then lost two at the crossroads ten miles back. So when it actually arrived, Darkness really did not want it to yet. She was enjoying just having it be her and Kazuma. Who now was her husband. Though she would not mind sleeping with him in an actual bed and not a bedroll on the ground. It made it difficult in the bedroll to have marital relations. In truth it was no fun at all. Stopping outside the Guild, she got out of the Carriage followed by Kazuma and before they could go inside. Megumin and Aqua came running, both hugging him. Darkness frowned at them visibly. Feeling something she had not really experienced before. Jealousy. Aqua noticed her expression. "Something wrong Darkness?" The Goddess asked and the Blond Crusader decided that she no longer wanted the two others to keep touching him. So she decided to tell them the news. While Kazuma decided to just remain silent. Feeling that if he said something then he would get into trouble.

"Nothing really that bad. But I would prefer that you too not touch my Husband as much as you are." Darkness stated firmly and both looked at her and then at Kazuma.

"Wait! Husband!" Aqua said loudly and Darkness then smiled.

"Yes Husband. We are married now and Kazuma is my Husband." Darkness declared and she was pelted with questions from Megumin and Aqua. Completely ignoring Kazuma. Who did not mind.

Returning to the Mansion their home, Darkness helped Kazuma pack his things and move them into her room. Which was now their room. While he put his tracksuit in the closet, she made room for his other possessions in her Dresser. "My Father is going to want to see us again. Make sure that we are indeed married." She told him and he paled. Wondering if it would be wise to do that. For one he would want an update on when they would give him Grandchildren. That was not in their plans. Well mostly her plans. She still wanted to go on adventures.

"As long as he does not try to have me beheaded. I guess that would be alright." Kazuma said and finished putting his limited clothes away. Hanging from a hook on the door was her Nightgown, he ran his fingers along the soft material.

"I have no intention of wearing that tonight. Unless you want me too that is. Otherwise I am sleeping naked...by the way so are you." Darkness informed him, sitting down on the bed and then patted the cushion right besides her. "In fact I think we need to spend some time on the bed right now."

00

Downstairs Megumin had left her room right after she began to hear some very explicit noises coming from Darkness's room right next door to hers. Across from her was Aqua who also had left her own room for the same reason. "Geez, if those two are that...noisy when they do it. Then I got to ask Wiz for some noise canceling headphones." Aqua commented with a small wry smile. "Who would have guessed that Darkness was a loud moaner." Megumin chuckled and shook her head.

"How long do you think they will be doing it?" Megumin asked somewhat envious that it was not her with Kazuma. She had to come to terms rather quickly that she had lost her chance. Since they bathed together, she had considered making her own move. Then again in her bedroom back at her home, then though The Devil Kings General Sylvia had messed that up. Now it was too late.

"Who knows? Knowing Kazuma and the fact that he is way sex deprived and the way Darkness is. I would guess that we might want to find Rooms further away from theirs." Aqua sighed, also feeling a little envious. Yes Gods and Goddesses could indulge. Now she regretted not indulging with Kazuma when they shared the Horse Stall at the Stables. She had considered a couple of times to give into her urges and seduce him, but each time he ruined the mood. Or the fact that there was the smell of horse shit in the air. When Darkness and Kazuma came finally did come down to join them, finished with their most recent session.

"How would you two feel about going on a nice pleasant trip?" Darkness asked and both looked at her. "I and Kazuma have to go formally tell my Father and I thought it would be a good idea if we all went." She said and Aqua clapped her hands together, smiling.

"Sounds good to me. I do not know about the rest of you. I could really use a vacation or at least relax. Without any worries or concerns.." Aqua said and Kazuma was about to ask her what she needed a vacation from. But decided to refrain from stating the obvious. Though he was still concerned about seeing Darkness's Father again. The last time when she told her Father that she was pregnant with his child, he at first believed that her Father would order his beheading. Like he did when he came into the Training Room and found her laying on the floor with her clothes shredded. It did not help that Aqua made it sound like that he had assaulted her. He know feared that her Father may not really approve of him. He was not a noble or a high level Adventurer. All he really had going for him, was he was a guy and that he was hopelessly in love with Darkness. Beyond that he was not really worthy to be with her.

"Don't say that. Every time we go somewhere to relax or where there is not supposed to be any worries or concerns. We end up fighting one of the Devil King's Generals and I end up dying again." Kazuma said believing that he may have more then average Luck. Aqua was the opposite. Somehow causing some type of disaster whenever she opened her mouth.

"I do not want you to do that anymore. No more dying. I will not permit it. I am not about to lose you anytime soon, not until we both are old and gray. Even then I do not want to lose you." Darkness stated firmly and made sure that Kazuma fully understood that he was to no longer put himself in jeopardy. Seeing her determined expression he smiled and nodded. He would have to come up with non desperate plans when the time came otherwise he would upset his Wife Darkness and he did not ever want to do that.

"I promise no more dying." Kazuma said to her and Darkness finally smiled back. Pulling him closer to her and put her right arm around his waist. Holding him against her.

"You still plan on defeating the Devil King, right?" Aqua asked. "I still want to go home." Though at this point she wondered if she actually did want to. She was having a lot of fun and she realized that back there, it was awfully boring. Here she got to drink, do her Party tricks and could actually interact with her followers. All the while go on Adventures with her friends. Yes they were here friends and she would hate to not have them around. "You know what...there is no rush anymore." She finally said.

0

Once again on a Transport Caravan and with the others along in the Carriage. Kazuma discovered something interesting about being married to Darkness. In Route to visit her Father, they came across some of those Running Lizards. Well she ended up getting trampled again. Later after they had dispatched all of the Lizards. He went to Check to make sure that she was alright which of course she was. So he was not ready for her to basically attacked him. Forcing him into some nearby bushes and demanded that he relieve the built up arousal she felt. Thankfully at that point Megumin and Aqua moved off far enough away so they did not see what was happening. To him though it was extremely good at the same time it was a little rough. Afterwards he felt like he had been mauled by a Horny Ogre. Stumbling out of the bushes, he walked next to his now satisfied Wife who smiled happily. "That was most thrilling Kazuma. We must do that again." She announced adjusting her Armor back into place. "Hopefully really soon." All he could think was he hoped not. Too many times like that and he would need Aqua to heal or perhaps resurrect him.

That evening, laying next to his Wife. Kazuma held onto her as she held onto him. He could not believe how wonderful it was to have and be with Darkness this way. If he ever did defeat the Devil King and gained that wish. He had already decided that he really had what he would wish for and it was her. He told her that earlier and she nearly attacked him again. Kissing him and holding him close. To gain some privacy they took a blanket and found a nice secluded place a good fifty meters away from the Caravan Camp so that none there could see or hear what they were doing. Then spent the night there until morning.

The Caravan arrived at her Family's Estate a half day later. To Kazuma's surprise when Darkness told her Father that they were married. Her Father hugged him, laughing like an idiot and completely accepted that they were married. Though he also continually asked about when there would be some Grandchildren for him to fuse over. Knowing recently Darkness had lied to him about her being Pregnant with Kazuma's child. Now he wanted it for real. They both told him that would have to wait until much later. Right now they just wanted to enjoy being married. He reluctantly agreed, though it did take her threatening to slap him before he completely accepted the idea.

To be continued