A/N: Hello dear readers! I do hope you like the journey the guys are about to embark on. Both have been changed by the events they each went through and need to find their place in the world now. I want to thank VegasGranny for pre-reading, ideas, support, and insights that made this story so much better. Sit back and enjoy the ride because things are going to get dramatic for the guys. I do hope you will leave me a review to let me know your thoughts. NC
Disclaimer: I do not own SPN and this is my own creation. Any errors are my own.
Chapter 1
It was just over two weeks after Sam had completed detox from demon blood, before Dean decided he was well enough for them to leave the salvage yard. Sam had voiced that he was ready after a week, but Dean would not have any of it, taking the mother hen card to the limit. He was making sure Sam ate small meals numerous times a day and pushed protein drinks on him wanting to get that lost weight back on his skinny frame.
During the downtime, Dean tuned up and went over the Impala, helped Bobby clear out a backlog of cars waiting for repair work, did laundry, restocked the weapon's bag and the Impala's trunk, and Sam took the time to read all he could on demons from Bobby's extensive library wanting to learn more about what his brother had become. Sam also helped Bobby with research for other hunters and manning the phones.
In the evenings when things had quieted down, they played cards, watched some old movies one of them found on the television, or with Sam and Bobby, caught up on some reading while Dean listened to the radio and just chilled. Dean would not let Sam start jogging, but they did go on long walks through the woods out behind the salvage yard. When they were kids and stayed with Bobby, they would explore and play games in the woods. It took them both back to simpler times in their lives where monsters were not such a huge part of it yet.
"So, you ready to do this?" Dean asked Sam as he packed the last of his clothes into his duffle and looked across the room to his brother. This was a big step for them and the start of a new chapter in their lives. Neither of them was the same persons they were all those months ago before Dean went to Hell and Sam, broken by grief and despair yielded to temptation and became addicted to demon blood. The brothers needed to learn how to work together and see if that bond was still there. They each had abilities to master and learn to use. He hoped Missouri could help Sam and in turn it would help them both.
"Yeah," Sam replied looking up from folding a shirt. "I feel good about this. I'm doing okay Dean," Sam assured him. He had not had any cravings for demon blood once he had detoxed off of it. His only hope was it would stay that way.
"Good, but Sammy if there's anytime you feel…Like if you start backsliding…Anything…You'll tell me, okay bro?"
"Sure Dean, I'll tell you," Sam assured him. "No more secrets, right?"
"Right Sammy," Dean nodded, zipping his bag, and keeping his eyes down. He still felt guilt about not telling Sam about Ruby but didn't think this was the time to do it. He wasn't sure if he would ever tell him, but he would see. It would not help Sam now and would only drive another wedge between them that they didn't need. With both of them being changed, they were learning to accept the other and building that trust and bond again.
They picked up their bags and headed for the stairs, trooping down them. Bobby stepped from the kitchen when he heard the footsteps coming from the second floor. He knew the time had come for his boys to leave and hated to see them go, but he knew this was for the best and wanted Sam to get help.
"We're heading out Bobby," Dean told him as they stopped in the foyer.
"You two be careful out there and stay in touch," Bobby said. He gave Dean a brief hug and pat on the back before turning to Sam.
"Thanks for everything Bobby," Sam said. He gave him a brief smile, not sure what to really say to him and if he would want a hug.
"Of course, Sam, you boys are always welcome here. You're family and don't forget that." Bobby stepped to him and pulled him into a hug, making Sam crumble slightly and a soft sob escaped his lips. They separated and Sam quickly wiped his face while Bobby pretended, he did not notice his tears.
"We won't Bobby, we'll stay in touch," Dean nodded feeling a tightness in his chest.
Bobby followed them out the door and stood on the porch as he watched them get into the Impala and drive away, hoping it would not be as long before he saw them again. He knew they would be in good hands with Missouri and she would keep him updated on how things progressed. He threw up his hand to wave, seeing Sam return one. Bobby stayed on the porch and watched until they were out of sight and he could not hear the roar of the engine anymore. With a deep sigh, he walked down the steps to head for the garage to work on the vehicles left he needed to fix.
spn
Sam noticed the sign as they passed it saying Lawrence was ten miles away. He did not have to look at his brother to know how tense he was becoming. The inside of the Impala was thick with the emotion that almost overpowered Sam before he blocked it. Sam did not know how he could help his brother. He knew this was something he had no control over, nor could he take the burden from him or help him carry it. All he could do was be there if he needed the support.
"I'm going to stop for gas before we get to the town limits," Dean announced, pulling Sam out of his thoughts.
"Fine with me," Sam replied quickly as he sat up straighter in his seat.
Dean gave him a slight frown hearing the tone of Sam's voice and knew Sam was probably feeding off his anxiety and tension. He worked on controlling his breathing and slowing his fast beating heart. He could do this, it was for Sammy, he thought. It was just a town like any other he had been in and he should not let it bother him.
He loosened his grip on the steering wheel and stretched his fingers that were cramping from gripping it so tight. Dean signaled his intent to exit from the highway at the next exit that offered a selection of gas stations. It was midafternoon and traffic had not yet picked up with the people getting off work.
The Impala stopped at the pumps and Sam got out to head inside, while Dean filled the car and looked around the area, never completely letting his hunter instincts drop. He looked for dangers but did not sense any in the area. The clicking of the pump brought him back and he pumped a little more before stopping. Once he had finished, Dean moved the Impala to the front of the convenience store and got out to go inside. He met Sam coming out and handed him the keys so he could get in the car. He looked around and saw the restroom sign in the back and headed that way.
Sam accepted the keys and went on out, unlocking the passenger side so he could drop into his seat. He knew Dean would want to drive the rest of the way since they were so close now. He sipped on a green tea as he waited for Dean to come back out. He was starting to feel a little uneasy when he realized this was really happening now. Talking about it and actually doing it was now making him nervous. He had not met Missouri before except as a baby, so she was a stranger to him. He trusted Bobby and his advice, and he trusted his brother. Sam looked up as Dean stepped from the store and strolled to the Impala to get in.
"Okay, let's do this," Dean stated as he started the car and pulled from the parking lot to get back on the highway.
spn
The Impala rolled slowly down the residential street and pulled to a stop in front of a two story, well maintained gray colored house. It had a small front porch with a chair and porch swing on one side. There were flower boxes and beds around the house that were full of blossoming plants giving it a homey and welcoming feel.
Dean sat in the car for a moment before opening the door and stepping out, trying not the think of the house that was only a few streets over, where their Mom had died, and his life was changed forever. He felt Sam fall in beside him and headed for the walkway that led to the front porch and door. They stopped at the door and Dean knocked several times and waited for an answer.
Locks could be heard disengaging from the other side and the door was opened to reveal a short, middle aged, coca skinned woman who peered through the screen door at them for a moment before her face broke into a warm smile.
"Well, look at you two boys. My, my, how you both have grown, especially you young Sam," Missouri spoke in her soft, lyrical voice. "Come in, come in."
Dean opened the screen door and stepped into the foyer when suddenly an intense strong pressure started bearing down on him. He stumbled back into the wall as Sam grabbed his arm to help balance him. He could not speak as he struggled to draw in a breath, not sure what was happening to him.
"Dean, hey what's wrong?" Sam questioned, panic on his face trying to figure out what was wrong with him.
"Dean, what's…" Missouri started as she took his hand but stopped instantly when something felt very off and dropped it. "Get him outside Sam."
"C'mon Dean, step back out," Sam encouraged pulling on his arm to get him moving and dragging him back through the door.
Once Dean was back on the porch, he leaned over and rested his hands on his knees as the pressure went away and he wheezed in air, filling his lungs. Sam guided him to the chair and made him sit.
"You stay here Dean, Sam come with me," Missouri instructed once she saw Dean was okay. They stepped back into the house and she led him to the back and to the kitchen. "Here is the key to the gate, go out the backdoor here and through the gate at the front and bring Dean to the deck. I think we need to have a talk before anything else happens. I'll get us some tea and scones to snack on. Go on with you now." She shooed Sam out the door and moved around to get the tea on and place scones on a plate for them.
Sam went out the backdoor and stepped onto a large deck that had a picnic table, several lounge chairs with a small table between them, a covered grill, and several folding chairs. He went down the steps and toward the front of the house seeing the gate Missouri mentioned. He unlocked the padlock and opened it so he could bring Dean around that way.
"Hey, Missouri is getting tea and scones ready for us on the back deck. I think you'll be okay there. We can get to the back this way."
"Okay, sounds like a better idea," Dean grunted, clearing his throat and easing from the chair to stand for a moment, making sure he was stable before joining Sam in the yard and following him back through the gate that Sam locked back. He saw the deck and headed that way.
"Why don't you take a seat at the table and I'll see if I can help Missouri?" Sam told him. He continued into the kitchen and put the key for the lock back where he had seen Missouri take it from before speaking. "Can I help Missouri?"
"Why thank you Sam, you can carry the tray out for me," Missouri said. She was sitting a pitcher of milk and small bowl with cubed sugar on it before stepping back to let Sam pick it up. She opened the door for him and let him go out first and set the tray on the picnic table. "Are you feeling better Dean?"
"Yes, little headache, nothing major," Dean replied rubbing his temple for a moment.
"This might help with that," she said pouring tea into three cups and letting Sam sit one in front of each of them. "There's milk and sugar if you like and I made the scones this morning, so they are fresh. Help yourself boys, you have to be hungry after your drive."
Sam added two cubes of sugar and a little milk to his tea before stirring it. Dean looked at his cup and frowned for a moment before picking it up to smell it first. He watched Sam and added a cube of sugar but no milk thinking tea should not have milk. They bit into the scones and found a crusty, fluffy, orange taste that was delicious.
"These are really good," Sam complimented Missouri as he took another bite.
"He's right, these are amazing," Dean nodded, trying to speak with his mouth full.
"Dean, manners," Sam hissed under his breath as he kicked his foot.
"It's fine Sam, Dean just enjoys food," Missouri chuckled. She sipped on her tea, smiling at the brothers as they made faces at each other and silently communicated. "Once you finish eating, I think you boys have stories to tell me."
Sam and Dean looked up at each other for a moment knowing for Missouri to help, she needed to know their stories. They were going to have to set aside their reluctance to talk about things and share it all with her, no holding back. Neither of them was anxious to begin.
Dean held his fist in the palm of his hand to do rock-paper-scissors with Sam to see who would go first. Sam looked at him and rolled his eyes with a sigh but positioned his hand to do the game. He could never understand why Dean always wanted to do this since it seemed he always lost.
Dean cussed silently under his breath when he lost and looked quickly to Missouri as she arched an eyebrow and gave him a knowing look. He hunched his shoulders and sipped on more of the tea, figuring she must have heard what he had said. He could feel the internal struggle in his soul and tried to quiet it so he could decide what he was going to say. Dean hoped she wouldn't kick them out and would help Sammy, even if he had to leave for that to be done.
Sam smirked a smile and could hear Dean cussing in his head and snickered when Missouri caught him. He had put up barriers so his thoughts couldn't be heard and went back to eating a scone. Even if he wasn't going first, he was still nervous talking about what he had done with Missouri. He liked her and could feel she was an honest, caring person.