Benji stumbled out of Victor's family's apartment, shocked at what had just taken place. He was thankful that he at least had half a mind to check that his clothes were on properly, pulling his zipper back up with trembling fingers. He walked carefully down the stairs and then headed for his car, groaning out loud to realize that he had forgotten his keys in Victor's bedroom. And there was no way in hell that he was going back inside that apartment for any reason that night, or ever maybe...
He let out a small shiver. The night had gotten much cooler, or perhaps it was like that on his way over and he was too distracted by Victor's text to notice. Swearing again under his breath for not having the sense to bring a sweatshirt, he pulled on the light jacket that he still had in his hand and tried doing up all the buttons on his shirt in an effort to stay warm. Then Benji started on the long trek home. But he had only walked a few blocks when he realized that that wasn't the best idea either. He was cold. And he couldn't stop shaking.
Spotting a bench out of the corner of his eye, Benji plopped down on the one end. He winced slightly as his butt came into contact with the cold surface, but there wasn't much he could do. Bringing his legs up under his chin, he tucked his head in, and let his sobs come out, their sound thankfully muffled by his body. Why was he so upset? This was hardly the first time someone had kicked him out of their house...but this wasn't really the same and he knew it. He had been so embarrassed when Mrs. Salazar caught them, that he hadn't had time to think about his response at all. Instead, his anger reared its' ugly head, and caused him to say things that he shouldn't have said. He meant them, but he shouldn't have said them out loud. Then for it to be Victor that told him to go, to leave...his heart just shattered in that moment and felt like it was continuing to break as he sat alone on a stupid bench in the middle of nowhere.
Suddenly, a hand rested on his shoulder, and Benji startled at the contact. "Victor?" he asked, raising his head to see who it was, hoping that his boyfriend may have come after him. Upon seeing Mr. Salazar instead, he flinched and pulled back as far as possible from the larger man. So far, Mr. Salazar had seemed rather welcoming, other than that embarrassing situation at Victor's 16th birthday party when he was still dating Derek. But this was different. He had just been caught having sex with this man's son. Did he know what had happened?
"Are you ok?" Mr. Salazar asked, frowning as he took in Benji's appearance and reaction to his touch.
Benji froze. There's no way that he knew what had happened if he was asking that question. But what does he do now? What does he say? Can he even say anything? He frantically wiped his tears on the back of his sleeves as he tried to think of what to say, how to lie without getting anyone in trouble. But then Mr. Salazar pulled off his jacket to place around his shoulders and he just couldn't lie anymore. "No," Benji choked out, shaking his head back and forth, tears springing up again. "No, I'm not okay," he whispered, looking down at his feet.
Benji knew that Victor thought he was this experienced gay guy that had all the answers. But Benji had nothing, nothing worthwhile other than Victor and now he wasn't even sure he had that anymore. All he had was an alcohol addiction, an unsafe relationship with a guy that had been way too old for him, and a self loathing for himself that still wouldn't go away. And now he had to add outing Victor to his younger brother to the list of things that he had fucked up.
But now he had Mr. Salazar looking at him with...with concern and that wasn't helping anything either. There was absolutely nothing Benji could say to him that wouldn't reveal what had happened that night or what a poor excuse of a boyfriend he was being to the man's son.
"I...left my keys at Victor's tonight...and I can't go back there right now," Benji said, praying that Mr. Salazar wouldn't ask for any more details. "And I...I probably shouldn't be driving right now anyways," Benji admitted, as he could still feel the trembles coursing through his hands as they gripped his knees.
Benji brushed back the strand of hair that had fallen into his eyes and sneaked a peak at Mr. Salazar. The man was still sitting there, giving him space but continuing to look at him with concern. Relieved that it hadn't turned to anger, Benji decided to push onward and ask for a ride home, which Mr. Salazar agreed right away. Trailing after the larger man to his vehicle, Benji passed Mr. Salazar his jacket back as he climbed into the passenger seat, eager to turn the heat on to warm up. The rest of the ride was mostly in silence, with the only interruption being Benji telling him where to turn. As they pulled up to his driveway, Benji turned to thank Mr. Salazar again but was interrupted before he could get a word out.
"Benji, I hope you and Victor can sort everything out. But if you can't, please don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it, okay?" Mr. Salazar said, looking Benji straight in the eye. Benji nodded, whispering a quiet thanks as he shut the door. While Benji felt unsafe in Mrs. Salazar's presence, he felt oddly comfortable in Mr. Salazar's, which was a welcome blessing if this relationship was going to keep going. He slid into his house undetected, and headed straight for bed. He would text Victor first thing in the morning and beg for forgiveness. Because he couldn't go back to having nothing.