A/N: this is my first fic! sorry it sucks
set after 2.12/ angsty
The air was cold, wisps of snow circling the life around it.
If she counted as a part of that life. At this point she honestly didn't know what to say, or why she was even alive. Derek had loved Meredith. He was still in love with her.
What was so special about Meredith Grey?
Hell, even Richard seemed to prefer Meredith to her. What did that intern have that she didn't?
She doesn't let herself mope. Forbes-Montgomery's don't mope- she made a mental note to leave out the Shepherd, if it even counted.
"Another one, Joe," she waved her arm in the bartender's direction and he handed her her seventh shot of gin.
"You're gonna feel that one in the morning."
Addison whipped her head around only to see Derek staring at her. Watching her.
As if he cared. But he didn't.
So she grabbed the glass in front of her and gulped it down, the alcohol burning down her throat.
He will still staring. He didn't say anything, he just say down on the barstool next to her
"You love Meredith." Her voice is raspy, and her voice almost breaks at the end of the sentence. He spreads apart his lips, only to close them, then to open them again.
"Yes. I do."
She can't help it. Tears leave her eyes. She bites her lip. "Say it." He looks at her confused, "I just did."
"No!" She shouts, slamming her hand down on the table hard the glass shatters. She gulps. She's afraid to speak, because if she opens her mouth, she going to cry.
"Say you love her, Derek, tell me right now, and I-" she looks down back her hand and a son escapes her lips.
"Say you love her, and I'll let you go."
She can't remember what had happened after that, but all she remembers hearing was the bell on the bar's door ring.