A/N: Rated M for music. Okay? Well no, it's for language. And for sex. Very McDreamy sex. And I've also never had sex. Or written smut. So sorry if it's bad.

Disclaimer: I don't own crap. Other than this computer. All characters belong to Shonda Rhimes and co. So don't sue.

"I'm so sorry, Addie. For Meredith, for the prom, for New York. I forgive you." Addison Adrienne Forbes Montgomery was shell-shocked. Derek Shepherd was finally doing what Addison had always wanted.

To apologize. To care. To forgive.

Why would he wait until they had signed their divorce papers to really actually care? Why is it just now he thought of what it would be like to lose her?

She had already thought about him leaving her forever, and every day she prayed to God it wouldn't come true.

Since moving to Seattle, all she has wanted was for Derek to forgive her. And now she had gotten it.

"Derek, I," She gulped, knowing she would regret what she was about to say. She stared around the room, hoping to give herself enough time to comprehend what she was about to do.

"I look at you and I feel nauseous. I feel sick. Disgusted." She breathed all out at once. She turned around, ready to leave the on call room.

She opened the door, barely making it out of the room before she felt Derek's soft lips on the back of her neck. She paused, feeling him nibble at her neck, knowing their would be love bites there the next day.

The sensation of his lips was thrilling. Alive. Sensational.

And she wanted it so fucking bad.

"Derek, no, I don't want this." She sighed. She didn't want sex. She wanted his love.

Any of him.

She wanted to be set free, but she didn't want to let him go. He cheated on her, but here he was trying to fuck her.

Seattle was really changing her. She'd never use fuck as a verb. He pulled her back into the room, slamming the door before pressing her back against it.

"Why are you doing this to me?" He whispered into her ear. "I'm sorry. Meredith wasn't right. I love you, Addison, and I will only ever want you."

I love you.

I will only ever want you.

She couldn't do this again.

"Der, listen to me. When I found Mer- her panties in your tux pocket, it killed me. I think my soul left my body. I cannot put myself through that again. I'm not strong enough."

Her voice cracked at the end of her sentence, and Derek felt his heart break.

"Well, I'll be strong for you." He pressed a kiss to her temple before pulling off her dark blue scrubs. He stared at her in her blue green eyes, lost in them.

He pressed his lips against her own, brushing a piece of hair out of her face.

The kissed deepened and Addison moaned loudly, craving his touch. "God.."

"I thought I wasn't God?" Derek smirked, yanking off her bra. He placed his mouth on her nipple, sucking it slowly.

He stuck out his tongue, flicking it arem

Addison arched her back, pushing her into Derek's mouth even more. He groaned, "Addie," He pulled off his clothes, ready to devour the woman infront of him.

He removed his mouth from her nipple pulling down Addison's pants. He looked at her soaked panties, with a laugh. "Just fuck me Derek, okay?" She demanded, her limited patience showing.

He took off her underwear before thrusting himself into her. She grabbed onto his shoulder for support, her legs suddenly feeling limp. "Derek, fuck" She moaned into his mouth he thrust into her a few more times.

Addison felt up Derek's dick before removing her mouth from Derek's tongue. She sucked it thoroughly, causing him to groan. "Shit, Addie." After a few minutes she let go of Derek's penis and he began sticking his fingers inside her.

1,

2,

3,

4.

"Derek I'm coming- ahhhhhhhhh yes. Oh yes, God!" She had reached her climax and it wasn't long before Derek had too.

They both collapsed to the floor in a sticky, hot mess, panting heavily. "That was-"

"Good?" He questioned.

Addison chuckled. "Jaw dropping and earth shattering." The red head lay upon her ex husband's chest, quote unquote snuggling with him.

Bizzy would have a field day.

"You know you called me God just now. Like twice. Did my jaw dropping and earth shattering ways change your mind?"

Addison shook her head, having forgotten an it it completely. "You have a God complex. Not that I'm complaining." She laughed and he kissed her forehead, because even though they both knew that they would face a tremendous amount of troubles, in that moment everything was perfect.