i have the apartment to myself tonight
She stares at the text as her car idles in the parking lot. She should just turn around and go back home. He wouldn't know the difference, she wouldn't have to deal with all the self-loathing in the morning, and maybe she'd actually get some sleep.
She sighs and turns the car off, cursing under her breath and wondering how she ended up here. Austin Moon has been her arch enemy since grade school, when he used to call her the teacher's pet and tease her for wearing glasses. Then, their rivalry only got worse in high school when she found out he's actually smart. She worked day and night for her valedictorian position, but all four years she was in constant competition with him despite the fact that she never once saw him study or take notes in class. That was when she really started to hate him. And of course, he thought she was annoying for studying so hard and asking questions and being a good student, and it didn't help that all of their teachers played into what they must've interpreted as a friendly rivalry.
Then they ended up at the same college, in the same class freshman year. She had decided to take anatomy as her science credit, and evidently so did he. And since he was the only person she knew in that class, when she started struggling she had to swallow her pride and begrudgingly ask him to tutor her.
Naturally, it was mostly petty bickering and her lashing out when she still couldn't understand the lessons, until one day he kissed her just to shut her up. After that, Austin said he had one more idea to try to help her understand anatomy. And while his way didn't exactly involve much tutoring, she did end up with an 'A' in the class. Thank god for professor office hours.
She knocks on his door before she can stop herself and runs a hand through her hair, cursing under her breath. She swore she wouldn't go back to this. And yet, her skin is already buzzing with anticipation.
The door swings open, and he raises his eyebrows when he sees her. As if he's surprised. He crosses his arms and leans against the doorframe.
"I heard you and what's-his-face broke up. Didn't think you'd actually come, though."
"His name is Elliot."
"You don't seem too broken up about it."
"Are you gonna let me in?"
He snorts and steps aside, and she walks into the all-too-familiar living room. It's only been a few months, but she could swear it feels like longer.
"Was he really that bad?" he asks, laughter in his voice.
She looks at him. "What?"
"It hasn't even been a week since you broke up, but one text and you came right back here."
She sets her jaw. "I can leave."
"You're not gonna leave," he says, rolling his eyes. Then he gently takes her keys and phone out of her hands and sets them down. "I mean, you already came all this way."
She lets him take her hands, but she doesn't look at him as he slowly walks backwards, leading her to his room. She doesn't have to look at him, because she's seen that stupid, lopsided smirk and knowing look in his eyes more times than she can count.
"I hate you," she says, even as he closes the door behind her.
"But here you are." She doesn't say anything, and he tugs on her hands to pull her a step closer to him. "Unless you really are having second thoughts."
She sighs and shakes her head. She may hate him, and she may hate herself for wanting him, but she wants him all the same. And he knows it.
"You really need to loosen up," he tells her. "If you squeeze my hands any tighter, I think you might break my fingers." He pulls her closer. "And neither of us wants that."
"You are infuriating," she tells him through gritted teeth, tightening her grip on his hands until he winces and pulls them away.
"You're no better, sunshine," he says, narrowing his eyes.
"Then why did you text me?" she asks.
"Why did you come?" he fires back.
They glare at each other, and she wishes her heart would stop pounding. But then he grabs her hips and kisses her hard, and her insides turn to fire.
She hates how much she missed this. She hates that no matter how hard she tried, she never felt like this with Elliot. She pretended, sure, and she did her best to forget what it was like with Austin, but she kept comparing them anyway.
"What's-his-name never stood a chance, did he?" Austin says against her mouth.
"His name is Elliot."
"When I'm done with you, you won't even remember your own name, much less his."
He ends up being absolutely right, but she'd never admit that.
"There you are," Trish says when Ally returns to the apartment the next morning. "I was worried. You didn't answer my text."
She vaguely remembers reading Trish's message, but she must not have responded.
"Sorry," Ally says. "I went home. My dad made this big dinner to try to cheer me up."
"Did it work?" Trish asks.
Ally nods. "Me and Elliot weren't together very long. It's not even that big a deal."
"Still a bummer, though. He seemed like a good guy."
And he was. Ally winces at a memory of Elliot waking her up from a very realistic dream asking who Austin was, and then believing her when she pretended not to know what he was talking about. And then the sad smile on his face when she broke up with him, and he just said he wanted her to be happy, even if it wasn't with him.
"It just wasn't meant to be, I guess," Ally says.
"Well, you are a catch. He's missing out."
She really shouldn't have told Trish Elliot dumped her. But if she told the truth, Trish would've asked why, and Ally would've either had to lie anyway or find a way to explain that she broke off a genuine, healthy relationship because she wanted to go back to having mind-blowing hate sex with her nemesis.
Luckily, Trish doesn't mention Elliot or the breakup much after that. But Austin definitely does. In fact, the next time she goes over there he asks her point-blank if he's the reason she and Elliot broke up. And, since she's a terrible liar, he knows the answer as soon as the question leaves his mouth.
She looks down so she doesn't have to look at his infuriating smirk. But then he tilts her chin up to make her look at his stupid, pretty face.
"I'm glad," he tells her quietly.
She turns her face away from him. "Of course you are," she says as his hands travel down to her waist. "It's all a game to you, and you feel like you're winning."
He chuckles. "You give me far too much credit."
"Please. You're loving this."
"Well, sure I am. It's nice hearing you missed me as much as I missed you."
She shivers, and she crosses her arms to try to hide it. "I didn't miss you."
"Right," he says, pulling her arms away from her chest. "My bad."
He wraps his arms around her and leans down to kiss her neck, and she shivers again. She closes her eyes as she snakes her arms around him, combing her fingers through his hair. "Why are we even still doing this?" she asks, mostly to herself. "We aren't freshmen anymore. This is stupid." He hums against her skin, and she takes a shaky breath. "Aren't you sick of this by now?"
He moves one hand into her hair, and she feels him smile. "Sick of you? Never."
She opens her eyes to look at him. "You once told me I was the most annoying person you've ever met."
Before she can realize what's happening, he bends and lifts her up, and she has no choice but to wrap her legs around his waist.
"And I stand by it," he says, staring up at her as he walks over to his bed. "But you're slightly less annoying when you're screaming my name."
She narrows her eyes and smacks his shoulder. "Well, I'm very sick of you."
He snorts and reaches under her shirt to unclasp her bra. "Sure you are."
"The more you talk, the more sick of you I get."
"Then maybe you should give my mouth something else to do."
She kisses him hard, and she isn't sure if her anger is dissipating or getting worse. But at this point, she's not sure if she cares.
Later on, after they shower, she can't look at him as she pulls on one of his shirts and a pair of his boxers. She hears rustling as he gets dressed too, and then a thud as he collapses on his bed.
"Man, I can't believe we never had shower sex until now," he says.
She glares at him and pushes him over before climbing in bed next to him. "Never again," she tells him.
"You say that every time, Ally. Neither one of us believes you anymore. Especially not when you broke up with your boyfriend because of me."
"Stop it."
He sighs and turns on his side to look at her. She starts turning away, but he rests his hand on her waist to stop her.
"Maybe you're right," he says quietly. "We shouldn't keep doing this if you're not having fun."
"It's not that," she mutters. "I just have a lot on my mind, I guess."
He chuckles. "You always have a lot on your mind."
She stares at his chest, reaching out and drawing designs over his heart with her finger. "I do have fun with you," she says quietly. "It's just when you talk that I regret everything."
He laughs. "It's a good thing we don't have to like each other to have great sex."
Suddenly she freezes. "Shit," she says, grabbing her phone and checking the time.
After midnight. And she forgot to submit her homework assignment in one of her hardest classes.
"What?" he asks, his eyebrows knitting together.
"I had an assignment due at midnight that I didn't do, so now I'm probably gonna fail this class."
"You're not gonna fail. Pretty sure it's impossible for you to fail."
"This is a hard class. I need every point I can get. I can't believe I forgot!" She brings a hand to her forehead. "Stupid.
Austin rolls his eyes and turns onto his back. "You gotta get out of your head, Ally."
She sits up. "Easy for you to say! You don't even have to try to get good grades."
"And we're on this again."
"I work my ass off, and you—"
"Can we please not do this right now?" he asks, looking up at her. "I'm exhausted."
"You're exhausted? You don't even do anything!"
In one swift motion, he sits up and kisses her, one arm around her back and the other hand in her hair. She responds hesitantly at first, but then she gives in to him, only breaking the kiss to pull her shirt over her head before pulling him back into her. And something about this time is different, even as he lays her down and trails his lips down her throat like he's done a million times before. This time, he doesn't taunt her or tease her or even really talk at all. He kisses every inch of her, stopping at her hips to pull her boxers off before moving lower.
He brings her to the edge once, twice, three times until she's practically begging, and his hands tightening on her thighs is the only indication that he even hears her before he does that thing with his tongue that always makes her see stars.
He sits up when she finally relaxes, and instead of wearing that infuriating smirk on his glossy mouth, he just stares at her while she catches her breath.
"What was that about?" she manages, and now he smiles a little.
He presses a kiss to her stomach, and then in between her breasts, and then to her lips before laying back down next to her. "Best way to get you out of your own head," he says. "And some…less noble reasons. But you're feeling better?"
"I guess I'm feeling a little less anxious, if that's what you mean."
He nods. "Good. Now get some sleep. For all our sakes."
She isn't sure why he's the first person she thinks of when she feels like the world is crumbling around her. But she can't really talk to her parents, and Trish may be a fun, loyal best friend, but she doesn't really have the patience to deal with Ally's breakdowns, as Ally learned a while ago. Her heart is in the right place, but she just doesn't get it.
So Ally finds herself knocking on Austin's door in the rain, shivering and fighting tears and already feeling like an idiot. She's about to leave when the door swings open, and the look of confusion on his face turns into one of surprise, and then concern.
"Ally?" he says, already taking her backpack in one hand and pulling her inside with the other. "What are you doing here?" Ouch. "This storm is insane, dude, you could've died driving over here! At the very least you're gonna make yourself sick." Less ouch. He sets her bag down and holds her by the arms as she avoids his eyes. What is she doing here? "Hey, did something happen?" he asks, brushing a clump of wet hair out of her face.
She shrugs, not trusting herself to speak without bursting into tears or throwing up. At the very least, she needs to stop shaking, but she isn't sure whether it's from the rain or her mental breakdown.
He rubs his hands up and down her arms. "Okay, well, maybe we can talk about it after we get you warmed up," he says.
She shakes her head and kisses him, and he squeezes her arms and kisses her back for a few seconds before suddenly pulling away, shaking his head.
He's never rejected her before. Another wave of tears threatens her eyes, but if he notices he doesn't mention it. "Go, um, shower and grab some clothes from my room," he tells her. "I'm gonna try to salvage all your stuff."
He gestures to her backpack, and she swallows and nods before going off to do as he says.
When she's showered and in dry clothes—his dry clothes—she does feel a little better. But not much. He's in his bed on his phone when she comes out, and he immediately looks up when he hears her.
"Hey," he says. "I think your laptop's gonna be okay, but jury's still out on your notebooks. We'll have to see how much the ink bled after they're dry. You want anything to drink?"
She shakes her head and sits next to him on his bed, looking down at her lap. "I didn't know where else to go," she says quietly. Then she looks at him, the weight of her actions hitting her. "Were you busy? Is Dez here? Oh god, I shouldn't have come—"
"Hey, hey, it's fine," he interrupts, resting a hand on her arm. "Dez is at Carrie's, again, and I wasn't busy. What's going on?"
She shakes her head. "It's nothing, I shouldn't have come here."
"Okay, no offense, but you look like shit. It's obviously not nothing."
She sighs. "I don't know, okay? I just…I feel like I'm drowning. In everything. All the time."
"What do you mean?"
"I don't know! Like, okay, I have an exam next week, but I feel like I don't understand anything in this damn class no matter how hard I study or how much work I do, and my professor is terrible, and I just feel like there's nothing I can do."
"You're smart, and you still have a week before the exam. It'll be okay." He sits up a little. "What's the class? Maybe I can help you study."
"Yeah, because the last time you tried to help me study went so well."
He chuckles. "Depends on your definition of going well."
"It's just not fair that you don't even care about your grades, but you don't even have to try and you have a 4.0."
He doesn't say anything for a while. "You put too much weight on your grades, Ally. You always have. They don't define you."
"Easy for you to say."
He purses his lips. "Why did you come here?"
"I told you, I didn't know where else to go." She looks over at him, glances down at his lips. "And…maybe I wanted you to get me out of my head for a while."
He starts slowly leaning towards her, but then seems to come to his senses. He shakes his head and pulls away. "This is meant to be meaningless fun, Ally. Not a coping mechanism."
"Why do you care? Sex is sex."
"Yeah? What's your therapist say about it?"
She looks down. "She doesn't know."
"Right." Austin takes a deep breath. "So, you feel like there's nothing you can do to do well in this class, and you feel like you're drowning. Do you think it might be because you put too much pressure on yourself?"
She shrugs. "I've held myself to high standards my whole life."
"Doesn't mean it's healthy."
"I can do it. I know I can. I'm just…not."
"Okay, but just because you can doesn't mean you should. Why are you so hard on yourself?"
She presses her lips together, and a few tears escape her eyes. "I'm not trying to be." She sniffles. "My therapist says I'm self-sabotaging."
"No shit," Austin laughs. She looks at him incredulously. "You take on way more than you can handle, you're lying to your therapist, and you're either fucking a guy you hate or trying to convince yourself you hate the guy you're fucking. I could've told you you're self-sabotaging."
Trying to convince yourself you hate the guy you're fucking. Does he really think that's what she's doing?
Austin sighs and moves a little closer to her. "You need to give yourself a break, Ally. You set these impossible standards for yourself, and it's not fair. Even when you do try to give yourself a break with meaningless sex, you end up hating yourself for it." He nudges her gently. "Just…let yourself be."
She sniffles. "I can't. That's my problem. I'm never good enough."
"Who says that?" he asks. "You?"
"Not just me," she says. "In high school, you were always better than me without trying. I barely made valedictorian, and that was only because you didn't take AP Lit senior year. And I know my parents are disappointed I'm studying to be a music teacher. I'm disappointed in myself. It's like I'm wasting my potential."
"You're not wasting anything," he tells her. "You are the smartest person I know, way smarter than me. You love music, and you love kids, so being a music teacher is gonna be perfect for you. Everybody who meets you loves you. It seems like the only person you're not good enough for is yourself."
"I don't know how to stop feeling like this. Or how to stop doing this to myself."
"I don't know either," he says, draping an arm around her shoulders. It's more casual than she's used to with him, but she finds herself snuggling into his side. "But I understand a little where you're coming from. My dad's never satisfied with me, always wants me to do more. It's different, obviously, but…I learned a long time ago that you just have to say fuck it and realize that you're you, and that's more than good enough."
"I don't know if I'll ever be able to believe that," she admits. "I don't even know where to start."
He looks down at her, and she meets his eyes. He gives her a small smile. "Maybe start with forgiving yourself a little, for not being perfect and for…me."
She exhales a little laugh and closes her eyes, draping her arm over his stomach. "You're just worried that if I stop self-sabotaging I'll stop coming over here."
He laughs a little too, his stomach tightening under her arm. "I'm serious," he tells her. "We can't keep doing this if you're gonna hate yourself even more every time we see each other. It's supposed to be fun."
"I do have fun," she says. "You're right. I'm gonna try to go a little easier on myself."
He glances down at her and smiles a bit, and then a clap of thunder makes them both jump and squeeze each other tighter. They giggle for a moment, but then Ally's smile fades as she remembers the reason she's here.
"Hey," Austin says, sitting up a little. "I have an idea."
He gets up, and she follows him to the living room. He walks over to the media console, his back to her, while she looks around, feeling awkward.
"You know, I don't think I could've ever remembered what your living room looked like, if you asked. I've been here like a million times, but I swear I have never seen that coffee table before in my life."
He glances back at her, grinning. "I think you're usually a little too preoccupied to notice our beautiful Facebook Marketplace furniture."
Suddenly, "Shut Up and Dance" starts playing through a speaker, and Austin puts his phone in his pocket as he walks over to her with a smile. "Whenever I fight with my dad, letting loose with music usually helps."
She smiles a little and sways slightly to the music. "So your cure to my complete mental breakdown is a dance party?"
"Yes," he says, grabbing her hands and dancing with her. But after about a minute, he stops and rolls his eyes. "Ally, it's just me here. No one's gonna judge you for actually dancing."
Her cheeks burn. "I'm not a very good dancer."
"You know what they say. If you're nervous, picture everyone naked." He winks and grabs her hand, twirling her under his arm, and she laughs a little.
"You're ridiculous." She shoves his chest lightly, and his smile grows as he takes a step back.
"Floor's yours, my dear." He makes a wide gesture and bows.
She takes a deep breath, realizing he's right. What reason could she possibly have to be embarrassed? She doesn't even like him, doesn't care what he thinks. And even if she did, they're a little bit past the point of no return. He's said too many (admittedly filthy) things about how much he wants her over the course of their relationship for there to be any uncertainty left.
So she busts out her one good dance move, limbs flailing everywhere, and Austin laughs harder than she would've thought possible. Her face burns again, but he starts dancing with her, doing her move for a few beats before taking her hands and just jumping around. He starts singing along, so she joins in, and she finds herself laughing with him as the flood threatening to drown her mind slowly starts to fade away. The problems and stress are still there, but she seems to have found herself a life preserver.
Eventually, they collapse on the couch, laughing and trying to catch their breath. He turns the music down and tilts his head to look over at her.
"You've got moves, Dawson," he says with a grin. Her eyes catch on his chest, rising and falling in time with hers.
She meets his eyes and smiles a little. "Clearly, I've been classically trained."
He laughs a little more and sighs, looking up at the ceiling. "You know, you're not making this very easy."
"I'm not making what very easy?"
"Being annoyed by you. Not liking you. It's easier to hate you when we just fight and fuck. Times like this…complicate things."
She doesn't say anything for a while, her heart pounding, and not just from the physical exertion of their little dance party. "It's easier to hate you when you're purposely pissing me off," she says.
They stare at each other for a while, and then he chuckles and shakes his head, looking down at his hands in his lap and flexing them before relaxing them again. "This is getting very dangerous," he says quietly.
She nods. "Maybe…Maybe I should go."
She starts getting up, but he puts a hand on her knee to stop her, meeting her eyes. "Weather's still pretty bad," he says, and she knows that they're both just going to pretend to believe his weak explanation.
After her exam, she lets Trish drag her to a party and allows herself this night to let loose. She meets a guy named Dallas, and between one moment and the next they're making out in the corner of the room.
It's okay. It's fine, it really is, but he's putting his hands in all the wrong places and the way he's holding her is weird and awkward and every time she pulls away to catch her breath or kiss his neck he just reconnects their lips, evidently not getting the hint that she wants neck kisses too, dammit.
And then she's getting bored, so when he pulls away to catch his own breath and finally starts kissing her neck, she's already over it. And besides, he isn't doing it right. But this is better than being alone with her drunk thoughts, and it isn't bad, so she lets him do his thing while she kind of zones out, looking around the room for something more interesting—and she finds it.
She didn't know Austin ran in similar circles as Trish, but he's here. Staring at her from across the room, expressionless. He downs his drink and then looks away.
An hour later, he's fucking her in some back bedroom.
She isn't entirely sure how they got here—one moment she was politely excusing herself from Dallas's company to go find Trish, and then suddenly she was here. She remembers dancing with Trish for a while, and then Austin coming up to her as soon as she left Trish for another drink. He was angry, or annoyed, or something, but he was all clenched fists and tight jaw and storming eyes and she couldn't take it.
"Fuck, Ally," he says when he orgasms, and he sounds so hot it sends her over the edge too. It's probably one of the top three she's ever had.
But then, after they've gotten dressed again, he drops a bombshell. "I can't do this anymore."
She looks at him, and damn his sex hair and lipstick-stained lips and the hickeys on his neck. "What?"
"I can't—we can't keep doing this. It was just supposed to be stupid, meaningless fun."
"Why? It's only fun to fuck me when I hate myself for it?"
He rolls his eyes and runs a hand through his hair, setting his jaw before looking at her again. "Seeing you with that guy earlier, I thought I was gonna fucking die. I can't handle you being with someone else." She crosses her arms, as if the pressure on her chest might make her heart stop pounding. "And that means it isn't just meaningless fun anymore, so I'm done," he finishes.
"You got a little jealous one time and now you're done? We've been doing this for years, Austin. This is stupid."
"It wasn't a little jealous, and it wasn't one time," he says quietly, and her heart leaps so far up her throat she's worried she'll puke. He's looking at her so intensely she feels bare, like her clothes and skin and muscles and bones have all melted away and he's staring right at her soul.
He takes a deep breath. "It wasn't a big deal, but we had that day last week and then I saw you with that guy, and…I just can't take it anymore."
"I thought our whole thing was that we don't like each other. We haven't gotten along since we were kids." Is her voice really that shaky, or is she just freaking out? Both?
"Yeah, you piss me off and you annoy me and you drive me fucking crazy." He swallows and searches her eyes, and she doesn't remember when they moved so close to each other but she can pick out all the different colors in his hazel eyes as she stares up at him. "But you also make me laugh and you challenge me and you drive me fucking crazy."
She can't breathe.
"I…" She tries to speak, but nothing comes out. And before she can gather her thoughts, he's gone.
It's only been two days, but she's going insane. She can't sleep, she can't eat, and Trish is convinced that something is seriously wrong with her. But all she can think about is what Austin said at the party, and all their interactions leading up to it.
That day she went to him when she was about to fall apart. After their goofy little dance party, when he said things were getting dangerous. She might have developed a little crush on him over the years—one that she never really acknowledged because it would've made things much more complicated—but she just thought he was going through the same thing. She never could've imagined just how dangerous he was talking about.
At two a.m., she's still wide awake. So she climbs out of bed, grabs her keys, and starts driving aimlessly.
Naturally, she ends up outside his apartment.
She takes a deep breath and approaches the door. She knocks, and decides that if he doesn't open it in two minutes, she should just go home and pretend she was never here. But he opens the door barely a minute later.
He looks exhausted, like he hasn't been sleeping either. Not for lack of trying, though, she assumes because of his bedhead and gray sweats and lack of a shirt. But when he sees her, his eyebrows knit together.
"Ally?"
She didn't think this far ahead. What is she supposed to say to him?
"I…I don't know why I'm here," she starts, and internally winces. "What I mean is, I couldn't sleep, so I kinda just started driving. But then I ended up here, and I've been losing my mind over all this and I just wanted to talk about it with someone, you know? But I can't really call up my mom or dad and be like, 'Hey, so, remember Austin Moon? Well, we've been hooking up the past four years and you'll never guess what happened.'" He smiles slightly, but she keeps babbling. "And I couldn't talk to Trish, because she'd freak out and she wouldn't understand and it isn't even something I'd want to talk to her about, and now that I'm here I'm realizing that the only person I'd actually wanna talk about this with is you."
She watches him, out of breath and a little surprised at her realization and immediate confession, and she wishes she knew what he's thinking.
He swallows. "The other day, you came to me when you felt like you were drowning."
"Somehow, you make things better. Even when we aren't sleeping together. And it's infuriating."
The corners of his lips quirk up. "Yeah?"
"I really, genuinely thought I hated you. Maybe I still do. I don't know." She runs her hands through her hair, dizzy and confused and exhausted and missing him even though he's right in front of her and she's still a little mad at him for disappearing the other night. "I think somehow you became my person without me even realizing it." He purses his lips, but she can still see his smile grow a little, and he looks down. She sighs. "All I know is that I can't stop thinking about you and you smell really good right now and somewhere along the way you started feeling like home."
His eyes snap to hers, and then he's grabbing her face and kissing her. It's softer than what she's used to from him, and she freezes for a second in surprise. But then she inhales his scent and melts into him, wrapping her arms around his neck.
His hands move to her back as the kiss gets lazier and slower, and she smiles a little in spite of herself. She feels his lips curve up too.
"What?" he murmurs against her lips in between kisses.
"You smell…really good right now."
"You said that. I think I smell like I always do."
"I think I might kind of like you." He kisses her, his smile growing. "Update: I think I might really like you."
"What happened to hating me?" he laughs.
"I really don't know, but I also really don't care."
"Well, I think I might really like you too," he says, kissing her again.
"That's good."
"Mmhm."
"Does this mean you're my boyfriend now?"
He nods, his nose bumping against hers. "Definitely." She can hear the grin in his voice.
"I'm very happy with this development. And you're fucking hot, too. It's not fair."
He pulls away a little to laugh. "You've said more nice things to me tonight than in the entire time I've known you."
"I've always thought them. I'm just saying them out loud now."
"Well, you're hot too." He kisses her again, a little harder. "So hot, in fact, that if you don't take your clothes off in the next ten seconds I'm going to lose my goddamn mind."
She giggles, even as goosebumps rise all over her body, and leads him to his room. "No more mind-blowing hate sex," she says, and he chuckles as he pulls her shirt over her head. "Now it's just gonna be mind-blowing regular sex. This kind of feels like the end of an era," she says.
He grins at her, eyes full of stars. "But it's the beginning of an even better one."
enemies/rivals w benefits is such a fun trope u guys leave me alone