Jedi Apprentice – Skywalker's Rescue

Chapter 1

There was a flash as the blue blade crossed the green blade, then snapped back, spun into a new position, crossed again, and again. Then the green blade was ever so slightly out of position and in an instant the blue blade was hovering just a breath away from Qui-Gon's neck. The older man froze mid motion, a startled expression on his usually collected face.

The surprise was replaced by pride.

"Well done, Obi-Wan," he said, smiling despite being slightly out of breath.

Then a flash of red and there it was again. The figure dressed in black snapped a blow to Qui-Gon's face, forcing him to stumble backwards. He attacked again, red blade sinking deep into Qui-Gon's chest. Qui-Gon crumpled to the ground. Again. Always the same.

"NO!" his voice sounded distant in his own ears.

Then he was holding his dying Master in his arms, tears clouding his vision. Maybe this time it would be different.

Qui-Gon reached a weak hand to touch Obi-Wan's face.

"Why weren't you there? I needed you," Qui-Gon's voice was sad, fading into nothing, "…You did this to me…"

"NO!"

Obi-Wan woke with a jolt. He was sitting up in his bed, breathing hard. Around him, the darkened room with the air cooler humming quietly in the corner seemed to mock him with its peacefulness.

He clenched his fists, eyes squeezed tight. Objectively, he knew it wasn't his fault. He knew he'd done his best and that Qui-Gon didn't blame him for anything. But that knowledge didn't stop the dreams.

Taking a deep breath, slowly managing to calm his racing heart, Obi-Wan laid back down. He curled onto his side, pushing his palms against his eyes, trying to block out everything around him.

During the day it was surprisingly easy to go about his life. He was the perfect Jedi, well adjusted and focused on his own young apprentice. But at night in the rooms that he'd once shared with Qui-Gon, the pain seeped back in. It hurt so much, almost like a physical hole in his heart where the bond he'd shared with Qui-Gon had once been.

The last few months had passed in a whirlwind. There was nothing like a ten year old apprentice to keep you occupied every moment of the day. It felt more like days to Obi-Wan, rather than months. Already people had stopped mentioning Qui-Gon. It was almost like they'd forgotten he'd ever existed, Obi-Wan thought bitterly.

The pain was welling up in his chest, tightening around his throat. It felt like, if he didn't let it out, it would consume him. Usually he would choke back the tears, force himself to get up and sit cross-legged on the floor, and lose himself in the Force, sometimes meditating until morning. This time Obi-Wan let go. He let himself cry, the sobs shaking his body.

Qui-Gon had been his family, his only family. It was okay to miss him. To be sad for him. To regret what had happened. How could he not?

Obi-Wan didn't notice the door slide open until a small voice called across the room, "Master, what's wrong?"

There was Anakin in his sleeping clothes, standing uncertainly in the doorway.

"Nothing," Obi-Wan lied automatically, sitting up and wiping his face. He tried to steady his voice, "What are you doing here?"

"I heard you," Anakin said softly, "through the Force. You miss Master Qui-Gon, don't you?"

Why did the kid have to be so perceptive? Obi-Wan sighed.

"Yes. I do," he admitted, feeling a small release as he spoke the words aloud.

He reached over to flick on the light beside his bed. In the dim light, he could see the conflict on Anakin's face. Obi-Wan patted the space beside him, "Come here."

Anakin hesitated, then sat next to him. He looked at the floor then looked up at Obi-Wan.

"I miss my mom," Anakin said it like a confession, sadness bubbling up and spilling out of him along with the words.

Obi-Wan was surprised by the strength of the emotions radiating from the boy. The Force around Anakin was tinged with sorrow and also…guilt. Guilt for leaving his mother behind while he set off on a grand adventure. Guilt because whenever he talked about her, he was told that a Jedi must let go of family attachments.

His mother was still alive, he hadn't witnessed her death the way Obi-Wan had with his Master, but she was so far beyond Anakin's reach, Obi-Wan realized, that she might as well be dead. Anakin felt the same way about his mother that Obi-Wan was feeling about Qui-Gon right then. It hurt to see that much pain reflected in someone so young.

"Oh, Anakin," Obi-Wan said softly, reaching out to stroke Anakin's hair in a rare gesture of affection.

He didn't know what words could make things better, the night was too late for meaningless reassurances. His hand rested on Anakin's shoulder. I understand, Obi-Wan sent through the Force.

The moment hung between them, then Anakin tiredly rubbed his eyes and asked, "Can I sleep here? It's too cold in my room."

"Alright," Obi-Wan said, too drained to think of any other response, so he shifted over to the side of his bed and adjusted the blanket so Anakin had space to climb up beside him.

"Only for tonight," he murmured as Anakin got settled.

Tomorrow is a new day, he told himself and he almost said the words out loud but his apprentice was already asleep.