A year ago today
One Shot Companion to Perfect

Pairing: McRoll
Characters: Steve McGarrett, Catherine Rollins
Mentioned: Catherine's Dad Admiral Jackson Rollins

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters apart from Jackson Rollins

12th November 2020

Punchbowl - National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific

Catherine was standing in a military grave site known as punchbowl, though she had lived all over the country at different times, her and her mother felt that Hawaii where Catherine and now her mother lived was the place to bury their husband/father.. He loved Hawaii and had always mentioned his wishes of wanting to be buried at the National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific.

A whole year had passed and while a lot of things had changed, including her coming home to Hawaii to be with Steve, one thing had remained the same and that was how much she missed her Dad. Despite him being in the Navy for many years and being away from his family, and then retiring as an Admiral, Catherine was extremely close to her father and her closeness to her Dad was one of the reasons why she herself wanted to go into the Navy and follow in his footsteps.

Feeling arms wrap around her and a chin rest on her shoulder, she sighed softly taking comfort in the arms of the man behind her. "He was a good man Cath". Steve had the pleasure and privilege of meeting Catherine's father, Admiral Jackson (Jack) Rollins, and while Jack did give Steve a bit of a hard time at first being that he was dating his only child, the two managed to get along and after seeing the two of them together, he approved of Steve and had hoped he could live long enough to see his daughter get married.

Nodding her head, not trusting her words at this moment, already feeling the wetness of her tears run down her cheeks, "He was the best", was all she could say when she did find her words. Steve knew exactly how she felt, having lost his father several years ago and he knew no words could make her feel better, and while he wished he was there with her seeing her Dad to the end, he himself had been dealing with his mother whom the CIA had believed had gone rouge.

His own mother had passed during that time, he had watched her as she had been killed, and he hadn't been able to stop it, his own tears were silently falling down his cheeks as they stood there at her fathers grave, just finding a way to process the fact that this wonderful man was no longer in this life.

After a moment, Catherine took a step forward and sat down on the grass, using her hand to clear the leaves off the plaque so she could read the carefully chosen words that her mother and her had asked to be written on it. Steve knelt down beside her and watched as she used the same movements he did whenever he visited his father at the same grave site.

Breathing in, Inhaling slowly and then exhaling, she calmed herself, feeling her heart rate steady out to a more regular beat when she felt Steve's hand in hers, squeezing softly and rubbing his thumb along the back of her hand.

"Wow, it's been a year.. It's hard to understand how I've continued on living during that time, it seems like a lifetime has passed us by and yet it also feels like no time has passed at all.. Some days it's all I can do to get out of bed in the morning". She stopped, feeling her lower lip tremble, "I can recall that day and the days after like it was yesterday".

Her voice was shaky as she spoke, and as she talked to him, her free hand was moving gently over the marble of the plaque, her fingers tracing the lettering of his name. "A lot has happened in the last year.. I've left the CIA for good, Mom and I have moved to Hawaii, I'm back in five-o and Steve and I have found our way back to each other". At the mention of his name, he squeezed her hand a little tighter, his own heart aching for all the losses they have faced over the years.

She looked over at the man she loved, the man whom in her eyes was so much like her Daddy that she couldn't help feeling proud of the fact she fell for someone so similar to her father. "We're taking things slowly, however I promise you that you will see that wedding one day, it just won't be as we all envisioned it with you walking me down the aisle". Her voice broke as she said that and Steve's fingers moved over hand again rubbing gently as she spoke.

"I miss you so much Daddy and long for the day when I can see your face again and feel your embrace. I just hope you are no longer in any pain anymore". Her shoulders began to shake as her emotions got the best of her and Steve moved his arm to wrap around her shoulders to help support her, his free hand moving to wipe away at his own tears.

Steve gently pulled her closer, and her head nestled into his shoulder as she cried softly, she hadn't let herself cry much over the year, she had too much on her plate and she knew if she started to cry, she wouldn't be able to stop.

His heart broke for his girlfriend, while he wasn't close to his parents as an adult, he knew that Catherine had always been close to her parents and that losing essentially her hero and one of her best friends was breaking her into pieces. All he could do was be there for her the way she had been there for him when his parents died.

When she had composed herself, she managed to take the old wilted flowers out of the vase that had been planted into the ground, placing them into a bag that they could dispose of later and then refilled the vase with fresh new flowers, Steve using his own water bottle to pour some more water into the vase.

"Did you want to go", she pointed towards where Steve's father's grave was indicating did he want to go visit his Dad but before she could say anything more, Steve smiled softly looking at her, "You take all the time you need here, we can go visit my Dad on our way out when you feel you have had enough time with your Dad". Steve had ten years to process his Dad wasn't coming home, ten years of visits to his grave and he wasn't going too take that away from Catherine..

All those little firsts, first Christmas, first birthday, first father's day, the first anniversary were all particularly hard and he knew first hand how emotional these days were so he had no intention of moving from this spot till he knew Catherine was ready. She leaned into him and smiled softly, "Thanks for coming with me today Sailor.. Mom was going to come but she didn't feel ready".

Wiping the tears from her eyes, he nodded his head.. "It's been an honour to come with you Cath, and I'll always be here for you.. While your Dad might not be around to protect you physically anymore, I'll make sure I'll be the one to always protect you, always".

This is why Catherine loved him, he was so selfless and always there for the ones he loves, "I know you will, that's why I love you so much and I'll always be there for you. Nothing will change that now.. You are stuck with me". Steve chuckled softly and smiled, "I love you too", his arm still wrapped around her shoulder as he added, "Good, because there is nobody else I'd rather be stuck with babe". They continued sitting there in respectful silence, knowing that wherever their lost loved ones were, they were happy and content.

Author Notes:

I'd love to thank all of my devoted readers for all of your support and for continuing to read these stories of mine. This was an impromptu story, it was never meant to be told however today the 23-06-2021 is the first anniversary of my Pop's death and it is my grief and my feelings that have driven this story. I began writing it to channel my emotions and how I was feeling and after writing it, I feel this is a strong story where it is more so a Catherine centric story as well and Steve there as her support system. For now this is just a simple one shot that I wrote as I was thinking back on the last year and what it's been like for me too be without my grandfather for a year and my mum without her father for a year, however I'd love to continue on with the more Catherine centric stories as I feel Catherine's story and her family need to be told as well.