Chapter 1

The morning sun is shining brightly through the window, playing with the dial of Jeff's watch. For a moment he focuses on the small rainbow on his wrists, but quickly turns to look at the mirror. He carefully judges his reflection. He can see the first wrinkles in the corners of his eyes and lips, even though he uses moisturize cream regularly. Like a lot. He still looks good though. Heavy exercising and low carb diet is certainly keeping him in shape. The cobalt shirt brings out his best characteristics. Brushing his hair one last time, Jeff grabs his sweater and leaves his condo, locking the door quietly. Just in time for yet another Greendale Community College graduation. It is held earlier than usual since College is facing a serious renovation that starts in June, but it just means more free time. He speeds trough parking lot to the brand new Lexus. And yes, Jeff might have been getting older, but at least he never went out of style. While setting the music on from his iPhone, he texts Britta:

"Going to be there around 7 pm. Graduation day, expecting the Dean's romantic moments overload. Will need a lot of alcohol. Be prepared."

The sky is ridiculously blue, the weather so warm that he needs to take off his jacket. Jeff knows the road like a back of his hand so he can relax while the music pounds in his ears trough a soundbar system. These days he seems calm and happy with what life throws his way. He got some of his friends back. Troy returned from his trip around the world. A lot wiser, a lot funnier, and not to mention, a lot richer. The trip of the lifetime helped him overcome intelligence insecurities and Troy finally was able to believe that he is capable of great stuff. Something that Jeff was jealous of for a really long time.

Troy used his money to set up a football club in Colorado and to fly back and forth to LA where Abed is making a carrier in movie business. He is not in the town much, due his business activities, but he spends here just enough time to have regular meetings. And thanks to Troy, they all can stay in touch and organize crazy get-togethers in the old Greendale style. God, Jeff is over 40 and yet he still plays those psycho games "floor is lava" at least once a year. He grins stupidly and feels his phone vibrating as he reaches the campus. He leaves his car on the spot near entrance. Quick maneuvering through group of students sitting on the school steps gets him inside the building. Still hearing some girls gushing over him, Jeff glances over phone. It's a quick replay from Britta:

"Been hiding the good stuff for you. Don't tell Shirley and don't expect a full bottle. Needed to taste it. You still pay for it, though.".

He decides to not push it now and argue over the issue later. He is casually checking his emails when he glances over cafeteria and spots Shirley. He's headed towards her, grabs a freshly made coffee from the counter without saying a word, and just waits for the snarky yet complimenting comment about his looks. And he is not mistaken.

"Watch it you handsome ass. It is not yours" she looks over him with amusement, but still she is a little angry that he made her use a bad word "damn you, Jeffrey."

"What happened here is between us and Jesus, And Jesus don't snitch "he smirks and Shriley gives him a playful pat on the chest.

"Don't play smart with me" scolds and grumbles about something while returning to stucking things in the boxes, preparing Shirley Sandwiches for a little holiday break.

Shirley's dad has died and she has decided to sell his house and bring her boys back to Greendale, where they all felt at home. Fortunately, "Shirley Sandwiches" survived Britta's reign and Shirley could easily slip back to the role of sassy mother hen of the Community College. And of course, their thinned group, where she can squint her eyes and throw "oh, that's nice" either in approving tone, or in that bitter way, giving you a clue that you will surely rot in hell. Jeff still doesn't know who is the winner of the "hell contest". He just know that he still is somewhere on top of the list, battling for the laurel of victory with Britta, even though he seriously did a lot of growing up. Truth to be told, Shirley helped him through his darkest times when he learned how to let go of this sick feeling in the stomach of not accomplishing anything and fought back a growing depression about his friends leaving him behind. Maybe it was because Shirley had this maternal vibe, or maybe because she was closer his age and experienced a lot of crap in those past years. She could relate and somehow understand him in a way no one could. They both experienced the bitterness of a failure, tears, disappointment. And whatever vision of career, money or accomplishment they had in their young minds, it never came true or never lasted. He learned that the hard way when his second attempt to be a rich lawyer didn't work out. She learned it when she made some bad financial decisions and faced yet another separation with her husband.

And they learned that it was ok. That the glory of fame and fortune did not define them. The only difference was that Shirley still believed the world was beautiful and good, and definitely worth saving. She would take care of her sick neighbor without thinking, help Britta with her love problems, even though they did not share a remotely similar version of the right behavior in such scenarios. And while Shirley will never be a Nobel winner, she belonged to that quiet and almost imperceptible kind of people, without which the life of any society would turn into a veritable jungle.

Jeff on the other hand, with his cynical nature, doesn't see the world that way. And never will. He can see the injustice and unfairrness, he got a hell of a glimpse of that during the law practice. But deep down knows, that friends that he grew to love as family, is all that counts. Call him a softie, but he is not ashamed of it anymore. Doesn't mean he lost his attitude. He still doesn't like doing work and getting yelled at. At least now he grades the tests instead of taking them. But these times, he doesn't need fake texting, one night stands (or to be precise regular one night stands, he still cannot bring himself to be in a proper, adult relationship. He thinks that's what still keeps him on the top of Shirley's "hell contest' list), lot of buzz (just some) or hiding his feelings (so much). Even Frankie stopped complaining about this whole dark part of his soul and somehow ended up respecting him, not only as friend, but as a teacher.

He smiles in what Britta calls "irritating smug Jeff Wingers' way". Almost 5 years ago, Frankie plotted behind his back and was ready to isolate him from the students. Nowadays, people went insane during paintball wars every single year just to get priority registration for his classes next semester. His charming personality and persuasiveness turned out to be really handy in a teacher job. And of course it tickled his ego, but Jeff found out that teaching was not only a way of making money, but could also be a source of gratitude. To be honest, maybe not a big source of money and gratitude, but he grew to like it. Who could have thought that he would choose it over a big, luxurious lawyer office in New York.

He is just fine. Just like Annie said he would be.

Annie. He refuses to let his thoughts wander carelessly around her. It is never a good idea. She is the only one from the group that he hasn't seen over 5 years. Truth to be told, they rarely speak or text. He knows that she is closer with the rest of the group, especially Abed, but still she hasn't seen them either. And what started as an internship in DC ended up being a regular job in Boston. Miles away. In some sad way, he knew that is what was going to happen. He knew at that exact moment when she entered the bar group meeting being so giddy and happy, passing the big news. He knew she was slipping through his fingers. And he let her go.

Yet, he still could picture every curve of her hot, little body. Her sexy smile. The pale skin and her blue doe eyes that he could not say "no" to. He remembers the scent of vanilla. And her purple organizer. Her endless enthusiasm, competitiveness, intelligence and bravery, all of which drove him crazy over the years. That she always sticked to her principles and valued the truth more than anything. That when she wanted something, she really fought for it. That she could confront him about anything, especially his bullshit. Like that one time when she cornered him about the thing between them, the thing that he really wanted to bury. He remembers that he hated talking about his feelings and tried to keep people at distance (and still does), but Annie somehow could really see him through. Yes, she got frustrated with him more times that he can count. And he got frustrated with her so many times. And yes, he was a dick to her many times during their relationship. Like that time when he lost his head and kissed her after the Tranny Dance, because he could not longer control himself. And then didn't want to admit it meant something. But God, she tasted so perfect. And the way her body felt against him, made him shiver. But he denied that. Just like he denied "the Annie of it all".

But he also remembers the blast of passion, the realization that he is in love with her. Remembers that she felt so grown up whith her speech in the Borchet's lab. That she was the reason he was ready to settle down and have a kid, which seems absurd. And he remembers six years (eleven now) of longing and wanting to fuck her senseless (yes, as we established he still is the guy). And he thinks he deserves some credit that he somehow managed to keep his hands to himself and it ended only on three kisses. Because the biggest motive of it all, was to protect her and their friendship. She hasn't lived her lifer yet. She had a girly crush on him and even when she grew up, she still was too young for him, making him feel like a creep to want her. And yes, that was an age thing. Not because she was so much younger that him, because with every year that gap narrows. But because he did not want to hold her back. He wanted her to taste the world. When Annie was getting mad that she was too young, that she was nervous just ordering wine or fed up with moving out and in constantly, he was getting fucking mad that he was getting old.

Did she really believe in her heart that she could be happy with him then? The cynical, sarcastic, egoistic Jeff Winger. Could she? He doesn't think so. But he plays different scenarios in his head anyway. And it kills him.

And he hopes that she understands this now if she didn't back then.

And while Jeff is still shocked sometimes that Troy, being at the top of the world, refuses to leave Greendale for good, somehow understands that giving the ridiculous amount of money and successful business, you just want a place that you call home. And that situation with Annie is different. Because Annie is something else. Brave, brilliant and beautiful. And she is going to change the world someday. Like she changed his. And she needs to grasp at world, to see and taste it for herself. And he wholeheartly believes the world needss more women like her. Even if he doesn't believe that the world deserves it. He misses her like hell.

"Jeffrey! What's wrong with you? I've been asking you the same question for the third time." Shirley nudges him, causing him to spill the coffee all over the counter. " I assume we take a cab together this evening? Andrew has the boys, so I can have a drink or two. I wonder what Troy has to say about the new Abed movie, the script seemed nice" she watches him carefully.

"I am fine, fine."he sighs. "Sure, I will pick you up at 6:30." And he doesn't even blink when she hands him a cloth to clean up his mess.

When they get there, the rest of the group is already at The Vatican, sipping drinks and laughing over something that Troy said. Franke mouths a silent hello, while Jeff moves two more chairs from another table for him and Shirley, and takes a full glass that Britta's handing him.

"Winger, Winger, how was the Graduation? Have you broken some young hearts today and you need me to scold you?" She asks playfully leaning back against the table. She looks nice though, she finally ditched her lousy blouses and rock boots. Must have been the effect of this new guy she has been dating for a while now. Or maybe they were just really uncomfortable for those long hours behind the bar.

"I didn't know you need a reason for that. If I knew, that would make my life a lot easier through years. Probably could save me some of my best days."He hoist a glass in her direction, like he just won some contest. Troy joins the toast and before Britta and Jeff could immerse themselves in yet another of their snarky conversations, he blurts:

"So guys, I've been thinking about Abed's 35th birthday celebration and what to do for it." Everybody glances up, a little bit surprised.

"Wasn't it like in March? When we had that videocall?" Asks Frankie with a raised brow, Shirley humming in agreement from behind her. Troy rolls his eyes.

"Yeah, we know, but since it is a big deal, and as Abed is getting seriously old" Jeff lets out a groan, "he can choose when he celebrates. And we did not throw a party in March, because he was busy on the set. The choice was easy, though. We went with Bruce Wayne birthday, May 27." He grins, but does not get the effect he expects, so tries to clarify. "You know, from Detective Comics #27 when Batman was 'born' "Troy rolls his eyes once again and sighs in disbelief when he sees empty looks on his friends faces. "Who are you people?! Anyway, we've settled on it being at Greendale, Community College. For one last time."

"Dean will never allow it." Shirley cuts in, "and sweet lord Jesus, why not celebrate in a proper way?" And the phrase "in a proper way" in Shirley's moouths, probably means just a simple cake at home. With no alcohol. And definetly not a paintball game. Or a lava game. Or any other game that will lead to a bloody massacre.

"I guess Jeff could talk Dean into it." Frankie offers, not sure why she gets herself involved in what seems to be a disastrous project.

"No way!" Jeff tries to protest angrily, but Britta is suddenly on board.

"Yeah, we can even get another video of Winger/Dean's famous duets." And her face lightens up. Every opportunity to mock Jeff is an opportunity to grasp. Welcome to the world of Britta. And she takes the rest of the group with her.

"And you know what's the best?" Troy laughs like a little boy, his body language screaming that he is a second away from dropping the real bomb. " Annie will be there. She has just confirmed it." He jumps on the wooden stool, getting literally everyone's attention, reading the text in a high pitched tone:

"Will be there. I wouldn't miss his *35? Cool. Cool. Cool* reaction."

He sounds nothing like Annie, but that's not stopping Jeff's from getting a sinking feeling in his stomach.