Harry Potter and The Gringotts Line
Harry Potter walked up the marble stairs of Gringotts. Morning rush meant that all the tellers were busy. But that did not matter to heir Harry. Very soon, he would be the owner of this bank. He had read all the fanfics. He knew what a visit in his fifth year meant.
He walked up to one of the tellers and cut in front of the line to reach him. He opened his mouth to politely greet him since he knew that no wizard has been polite to goblins. The fanfics, ahem.. the prophecies foretold that if he was, they would happily go to war with the wizarding world for him.
WHAM!
"Someone hit him hard!"
"Belt him across the face!''
The people he cut in front of were disgruntled wizards and witches waiting to pay their wizarding FDR and DPS.
''Muggle world or magical, you do not cut in front of the line, even if it later turns out you own the bank And no jury shall convict them, especially if the juries were also among those you cut in front.''
Those words were written on Harry Potter's Tombstone.
Lucious Malfoy legitimizes Pure Blood Supremecy
Report by Reeta Skeeter
Lucious Malfoy has used the unfortunate death of Harry James Potter Goku Black Vader Uchiha Senju Kurosaki (and a billion other titles that we will not publish as we will run out of paper before we finish) to legitimize his pureblood supremacy movement.
"Harry Potter belonged to and is the heir and head of every single house in existence. The conduct of the head of the house must be followed by every member. We are following the teaching of the head of the house. He saw it fit to cut in front of the line of lesser humans means that he considers titles, blood purity, and houses to be the absolute determiner of privilege and priority."
He called his allies to action last night from his ancestral manor. They responded by holding a party there to celebrate the Boy-who-cut in front of the line's championing of their cause.
Malfoy family's ancestral manor burns down during a rambunctious party
A party held by Lord Malfoy went out of control yesterday and burned down his ancestral home. Mr. Malfoy, held the party to honor the Boy-who-cut in front of the line's championing of their cause. I have since found out that the fire in the fireplace went out of control and someone poured the entire collection of Mr. Malfoy's wine cellar to quell it. However, Albus Dumbledore has replied to this reporter's query by stating, " It would appear that nobility's gift does not include common sense." Mr. Malfoy refused to comment on the matter when this reporter asked him, as he is unconscious with third-degrees.