AN: Hey everyone, this is Phoenix, at your service. This is my first Founders fanfiction, and I hope it will go somewhere! Please F, R, F. I will put story recommendations at the end of every chapter. I got this splendid idea from* scroll down. Have fun!

Sixth Year, Day 1

Poopsies! Voldy! And..Underwear?

"How are you today, Mr. Potter?"

"I'm fine, and how did you get into my dorm?" Harry Potter was rather unsure of the name of this mysterious person who had just appeared right across from him with a bow and a flourish. The stranger had cast a muffliato around them and smiled brightly.

"Just call me...Zar-Zar! I was always a fan of that show..what was it? Oh yes, Fart Doors." The man - "Zar-Zar" laughed. He had a long, pointy beard, a slightly manic smile, and an old hat that rather resembled the Sorting Hat. "So..what are you doing in my dorm, again? Also, it's Star Wars, not Fart Doors." Harry was slightly confused.

"Why must you ask such trivial questions like that? If you must know, I'm here to inquire about this book." Zar-Zar said venomously, his demeanor instantly changing. "Uh..what book?" Things seemed to be getting stranger and stranger. "THIS BOOK!" Zar-Zar screamed. He pointed upwards to a book that Harry was absolutely sure he had never seen before. Also, it was levitating. In the air. So... "Uh..what about it?" Harry asked. Zar-Zar looked even more enraged by that.

He levitated the book down and Harry read the title out loud. "Potions For Dum-Dums: By Salazar Slytherin." "YOU SEE?" Zar-Zar yelled. "No..and also - where did this come from? I could use it." Harry was hopeful. "That's beside the point! The REAL point is, what right do these-these ruffians have to throw around my- I mean Salazar Slytherin's name?"

"Every right, actually!" Harry said, proud that he remembered this little tidbit about the law. "Since Sir Evil Snaky died, like, a thousand years ago, we all can-do whatever with his name. Heck, I could swear fealty to Voldy-poo in public and say Salazar Slytherin did it! It's freedom, bro! There are so many dead people's names to choose from!"

"Sir EVIL SNAKY?!" Zar-Zar threw his hands upward in rage. He accidentally undid his Muffliato in the process, and the other children awoke. "Oopsies, gotta run! Send Voldy my love. Underwear!" Zar-Zar Apparated in a shower of sparks, which really made no sense because you couldn't Apparate in Hogwarts. "Whazzit.." Ron blearily asked.

"Why're you awake?" Harry mumbled, pretending to be asleep. "I was asleep.." He said. "I thought I heard something.." Ron looked around, confused. "M-me too..it sounded like someone yelled..'Poopsies! Gotta run! Underwear!'" Dean Thomas said. "Say what now?" Harry's voice became high.

"That's, that's crazy, man! That's mad! Underwear?" Harry chuckled nervously. "You mad. Now if you don't mind..I..have to go..rescue someone, that's right, yes? I'm that one..the Goy Who Lived..or died? Bye.." He madly dashed for the nearest bathroom. "What's with him, eh? It's only the first day.." A very bemused Ron stared at where Harry had been just a second ago.

AN: Hihihi, these chapters will be short. VERY short. If you have questions, requests, pairings, etc, just PM me. A quick thing, this was supposed to be a joke fanfiction, but now it's evolving into something more. I hope very much that I can stick with this! And yes, I wrote "Goy" on purpose.

Now for the reccs. Sometimes I'll summarize, or add a note, sometimes not. NOW READ.

*The Dark Phoenix by Peverell's Rise

Courage and Cunning by preciousann : one of the best fanfictions I have ever read. It's about Salazar Slytherin as Harry potter - but with a TWIST.

If you can't find them or have any trouble, PM me, or review it. If you want me to get notified, review, because I get an email notif whenever someone reviews. PMs I get no emails, so I may take longer to respond. But either way, it's a huge joy to know someone cares. :)

Happy reading!