This chapter is going to change a lot of things. You'll see. I hope you'll enjoy it.
Time to say goodbye
It was the second time Merlin fell asleep in just a few days, but this time he was in Camelot and he was caught by Arthur.
His magic might have helped him a lot, but there was hardly a spell that could make him immune to tiredness for long. Much as he hated it, the warlock had to make some choices; he had to give up something. Some decisions were really difficult. However, a lot of things had changed since Arthur became king. If it hadn't been for Morgana, Camelot would have been a safer place than it had been during the reign of Uther.
Now, Morgana wasn't a threat anymore, but he'd learned from experience that once a danger was removed a new one would take its place. Even if he wasn't used to relying on others to do his job, Merlin knew he had a lot of people that would keep an eye on Camelot if only he asked them so. However, giving up his job as a servant and moving to Ermet made him feel as if he would abandon Arthur.
Arthur was furious. Merlin hadn't finished polishing his armor and he needed it. Moreover, his servant had fallen asleep while doing his chores. He started to scold Merlin as he'd always done, but for the first time, Merlin was speechless. His servant's mind was far away and the king couldn't reach him.
If he were to think better, he wasn't as furious as he'd thought. Even if he'd never said it aloud Merlin was his friend; maybe the only friend he had. Merlin had always been there for him when he'd needed him.
"Arthur, you need to find someone else; someone who could really do his job. I…. I'm not good at polishing armor and…" Merlin gathered all his courage to say those words. It wasn't easy to let go of so many years and memories.
"You've been a disaster before, Merlin." Arthur tried to joke, yet the way his servant had spoken made him doubt it was actually funny.
"Before I had to help an arrogant prince to become a fair king. Now, you don't need me anymore."
Of course, Arthur still needed him, but it was time for the king to learn to deal with life himself. It was time for Merlin to trust that Arthur would make the right choices without him. No matter how much he wanted to protect his friend, he couldn't be there forever.
"But…." Arthur muttered.
"You are my friend, Arthur. You can ask me anytime for a piece of advice, but Camelot is not my home anymore. I fear it never was." It was now or never. He'd always been afraid of what his friend would think about him were he to reveal his magic. However, it wasn't fair for them to be lied to. If they really were his friends, then they would accept him; if not, then it was not worth making illusions.
"But…you said that you'd be my servant until the day you'll die." Arthur reminded him. Why had he made it more difficult than it was already?
"You need someone better than me. I bet Gorge would be a better servant. My job was never to polish your armor, but to teach and support you. You've changed a lot and Camelot is safer than it used to be. Look at what we've achieved, all of us: you, Gwen, the knights. But, I don't belong here."
"I don't understand. What had happened? Where do you want to go?" Arthur started to attack him with questions. Even if he didn't want to say it aloud, the king was afraid that he'd said something wrong. "Don't be an idiot, Merlin."
"I've figured out that there is no place for me in Camelot. Arthur, I have magic." He was serious, but Arthur didn't take him seriously.
"Merlin, you're an idiot."
"I mean it." And before Arthur could say a world, he saw his sword levitated. "I'm sorry, Arthur. I wished I could have told you before, but you needed me then. I couldn't take the risk." Merlin said as he saw the disappointment in his friend's eyes.
It was little to say Arthur was mad. Merlin was his friend and he'd never expected to be lied to by him. He could not understand why he would do something like that.
"Why? Why do you use magic, Merlin? What do you want?"
"Why? Do you really think I had a choice? I was born like that. I could perform magic before I was able to walk. I wish you could understand. If you ever change your mind, you can always find me. Till then, take care of you, Arthur."
It wasn't what he'd hoped for. The fact that Arthur didn't understand he was like a freezing shower, but the warlock had been prepared for that moment for a very long time.
Arthur, though, was still shocked. He wanted to believe Merlin, but he couldn't. He'd already been betrayed by too many people. He'd seen how evil magic could be and he didn't want to risk everything. He was the king now and for the sake of Camelot, he couldn't let Merlin run away no matter how much it hurt him.
So he called the guards and demanded them to arrest Merlin. The king didn't want to kill him, but he hoped he would buy the time he needed to make a decision that way.
Merlin said nothing. He allowed the guards to take him. If Arthur didn't want to accept him, he was free to do whatever he wanted, but the warlock wouldn't hurt innocent people. He wouldn't die at Arthur's hand, either. He would escape at night. The warlock had already done it numerous times before.
Everything went according to plan. The guards didn't notice when he passed by them. They were already snoring loudly. Merlin ran out. The court was empty, but not for long. The bells started to ring and soon the soldiers of Camelot began to gather. They were hardly a match for him. Yet he preferred to hide behind some wooden barrels and wait. They'd been his friends, after all, and there was no need to harm them.
To his surprise, some of the people of Camelot came to give the soldiers a hand. They were all armed with whatever they could find: pitchforks, axes, knives. They were already sick of wars and sorcerers. They'd all loved Merlin, but everything was different now. Their fear of magic was stronger.
Merlin sneaked in the darkness as silent as a cat. He waited for a moment when no one could see him and ran towards the gates. However, he'd never expected to meet Arthur there and the king didn't seem willing to let him go. He called the guards and in just a moment, Merlin found himself surrounded by furious people and soldiers.
"I don't want to hurt you," Merlin said as he saw there was no way out. "Arthur, let me go. I won't come back. I promise." He had a kingdom to go back to. He had people who waited for him. He had friends there. He couldn't die in Camelot. He wouldn't die like a traitor.
"You should have never used magic, Merlin. I've trusted you. I can't let you go. I won't let you become like them." Arthur said. He tried his best to control his voice and be the king people expected him to be
"I've always had magic. If I wanted to destroy Camelot, I could have done it. I won't harm you. If you let me go, no one would suffer." He practically begged them, not even thinking that he could have taken them all with just a glow of his eyes. And Merlin meant it, but people were too afraid of magic to let him go. He only needed to move his hand a little (without any intention of attacking) to become the prey of the numerous arrows the soldiers had sent towards him as some of the soldiers freaked out and they decided to act even if Arthur hadn't given the order.
It hurt him for a while, but then the pain was replaced by weakness. He just wanted to sleep; to forget everything; to let go. He closed his eyes, but there, in the darkness, he saw Aithusa dancing in the sky, he saw kids laughing loudly while tiny fire dragons fly on the air, he saw new villages and huge fields with grains….and fairies flying over the lake…and unicorns coming to drink water from the cool spring. He couldn't let go...
The moon was bright in the sky. For many years it had been his friend. It had lightened its way through the forest. It had lightened his way home, but today he was leaving Camelot and he preferred darkness.
He blew off all the torches. Then he cast a spell on the sky and clouds covered the moon. None could see a thing and the people could do nothing but watch as the darkness grew until they couldn't make out friends from the enemy.
None dared to take a step. Then the great gate opened and they felt something sneaking very close to them, but as they tried to catch that thing they only managed to catch the ones next to them. Before other soldiers with bright torches joined them, the great gate was closed again and Merlin wasn't to be found.
Arthur inspected his people. There were spots of blood everywhere, but none of his people was hurt. Yet Merlin was. He'd only wanted to protect his people, but it had ended horribly. He wondered if Merlin would be safe. He wondered if he would hate him for that. The king knew it wasn't a coincidence that the clouds had covered the moon. He knew it wasn't the wind that blew off their lights. It was magic. It was Merlin. Even if he had little knowledge about magic, he understood enough to know that Merlin wasn't an ordinary sorcerer. And yet he'd always stood by his side…. He remembered his words. Merlin had made him a king. He'd taught him to make the best choice. And tonight he'd left his men to harm him. But Merlin let them live.
