PASSIONATE FRIENDS

Sam Seaborn took C.J. Cregg out for a drink. He nearly had to kidnap her to get her out of her office before midnight. These days C.J. rivaled Leo McGarry for hours logged after dark. Leo's wife had left him, that and his responsibility to his best friend, President Jed Bartlet seemed to justify Leo having no life.

C.J. used to be better at balancing things. She'd thrown impromptu dinner gatherings, sent people home before the hours got too late at work and urged balance in lives. C.J. had appeared headed for some semblance of a personal life herself.

Reporter Danny Concannon had worn down her resistance to dating him with charm, tenacity and a Goldfish named Gail. But wagging tongues, worries about conflicts of interest and wary glances convinced C.J. to shut Danny out.

Sam didn't object to C.J. and Danny. He liked the Senior White House Reporter and recognized he'd been more than fair to the Bartlet Campaign and White House. Sam liked the light in C.J.'s eyes when Danny was around or when C.J. looked at the Goldfish in its bowl.

But disapproval, mostly unspoken from Leo and Toby Ziegler had done a job on her. It had an unexpected effect, C.J. hadn't just shut out a bewildered Danny, she'd shut out everyone.

C.J. concentrated solely on her work. She spent time with the rest of the Senior Staff only to get things done. Her tone was light with the Press Corps but everything else had an edge to it.

Sam searched for the right word, she'd become brittle. As they sat having drinks he told her that and said, "You're more like, I don't know, like..."

"Like one of the guys?", she finished for him.

"I guess that's it.", he decided. "It's not you C.J."

"Sure it is. It's the new me-the all business me, the life at the White House above all other life me." She toyed with her glass of wine.

"But C.J. you don't have to be like that. You were effective when your office was a haven. Now it's just a place of ...

"A place of business Sam."

"I suppose. Why can't it be a place of business with the little touches you used to have? Where's the Goldfish? Where's the blanket to steal for late night report reading? You even got rid of your candy jar and your personal pictures."

"And the world hasn't ended Sam because of that. I get a lot more accomplished."

"Because people leave you alone C.J. You used to be a magnet, now you're a leper."

"Pretty weak analogy, Sam." C.J. gave him a tight lipped smile. "Toby would lambaste you."

"Let him. I'm more worried about you C.J."

"Why? My job is getting done and done well. I have to figure that's true, I don't hear any different. Neither Toby or Leo have called me on the carpet for weeks."

"Maybe that's because you naturally evolved into doing the job better with more experience. We're in a different place in terms of what we want to accomplish."

C.J. looked at him. "All I want to accomplish is getting through a day unscathed."

"That's no way to live C.J. You're just existing."

"It doesn't matter Sam, as long as I function at the White House."

"It does matter. As your friend, I want it to matter, you deserve better." He reached over to touch her hand and she recoiled at his touch.

An astonished Sam pulled back, then saw the tears in her eyes. But there was anger in her tone. "I don't want your concern, your pity or your friendship. It's not on my agenda."

His tone matched the anger in hers. "Well revise your agenda because damn it, I'm your friend, like it or not."

"Why? What difference does it make if we're friends or merely coworkers?"

"Friends are a rare commodity in this world C.J. and even rarer in this town."

"That's certainly true." There was bitterness in her voice. "I found out how many friends I had when I tried to build a life outside the West Wing."

"You didn't ask me C.J."

"What would you have said?"

"The hell with them, the hell with me. You proved your loyalty during the campaign. No one has a right to question it now."

"Why didn't you say that Sam, to me or anyone else?"

"Because I wasn't paying attention. I didn't realize what kind of trouble you were in or I would have offered a life line sooner."

"When did you notice I was in trouble?"

"When you stopped filching my French fries."

"Be serious."

"I am. I would never get through lunch with you around. My pile of French fries always dwindled. I thought I hated it until you stopped doing it. I miss it. I miss you C.J."

There was still a film of tears in her eyes but there was also a look of panic. "I miss me too." That admission nearly broke through the wall she'd built. "I have to get out of here before I make a fool of myself."

She stood up, grabbed her things and headed for the door. C.J. could not lose control in a room full of people, tattlers were everywhere in D.C. Sam threw more than enough money on the table and went after her.

But he was careful to keep his face composed and his pace leisurely. Like C.J., he knew the importance of appearances. He caught up with her at the entrance. "C.J. wait. You can't leave like this."

"Sure I can. I'll just get a cab back to work. Thanks for the drink, Sam."

"No, I mean it. Let's go outside." He guided her through the door. "You're not going back to work. There's enough work in your briefcase, right?"

"I suppose but it's early."

"C.J., it's 10 o'clock."

"Okay, it's early somewhere." There was a ghost of a smile on her face. "Call me a cab."

"You're a cab. Look, your apartment is a few blocks from here. Do you want to walk?"

"No, I want to work."

"Give it up for tonight."

She made an exasperated sound. "Aren't you a little over qualified to be a baby-sitter? Let's go." They began to walk. "Did you pick this place because it's close to mine?"

"Sort of. It's away from the White House but you can always get a ride." The Inner Circle always used cabs when drinking. They wouldn't take the chance on a drunk driving charge or scandal. Sam asked one more time, "Walk or ride?"

"We're walking, let's not change that." A resigned C.J. set off at a rapid rate. Sam had to hurry to keep up with her long legged stride.

At first they were silent. Sam decided to go for broke. "What happened with Danny?"

"Let it go, Sam."

"Did he hurt you?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Sam."

"I don't mean physically. We'd have killed him if he did that. But, something hurt you."

"Okay. Let's get this said. I stopped things because of all the gossip, innuendo and pointed comments about us. I thought it was a conflict of interest. Danny momentarily convinced me otherwise."

"He did?"

"Temporary insanity fed by tenacity, charm and a Goldfish." She choked on the words and Sam could see her becoming upset.

"Why'd you recover?"

"I told you."

"No chance of a relapse?"

"Danny tried. I didn't totally shut him out until Mandy's memo story. I couldn't believe he'd run it. So I guess he did hurt us. " They were at C.J's building. She turned to Sam. "Thanks for the escort, the concierge can get you a cab."

"I'm coming up. We're not done talking."

"Sam..."

"C.J. there's more to say. Want me to shout it out here?"

"Fine. Please come in."

"You're so generous." His sarcastic tone mirrored hers.

"Take it or leave it."

**********
C.J. unlocked her apartment door. Sam noticed a difference from his last visit. The apartment seemed colder. C.J. acknowledged that by moving to turn up the thermostat as she kicked off her shoes. "Hard to figure on the right temperature."

Sam heard the heat click on but knew warmth would still be lacking. C.J. used to have flowers, candles and potpourri throughout. They were missing. He mentioned it.

She shrugged. "I don't have a lot of time here or time to shop. Not doing much entertaining. But I do have wine." She served them wine. Sam had kicked off his shoes. When she handed him his glass, she caught him looking around. "What are you looking for?"

"The Goldfish."

"You want something to eat?"

"I wouldn't eat your Goldfish."

"I can buy more."

"Not like that."

"Crackers, Sam."

"I meant THE GOLDFISH."

"Oh."

"I don't see it."

"No." C.J. settled on the couch. Sam sat next to her.

He asked in a worried tone. "You didn't get rid of it, did you?"

"You mean flush it. Of course not."

"Did you give it back to Danny?"

"No. The fish is fine."

"Why'd you keep it?" He took a sip of wine and waited.

"Why not? It's just a fish."

"Right. If it's nothing, get rid of the reminder."

She looked into the wine glass as if looking for answers. "It's all I have left of Danny, okay?"

"C.J., you still care."

"So what?"

"So get him back. Go for it. You deserve a personal life like the rest of us."

C.J. set the glass down with a thud and laughed bitterly. "What a joke that is. You guys are lousy examples."

"How can you say that?"

"Sam, none of us have lives from the top down."

"C.J., the President and First Lady..."

"...are rarely together. One of them is on the road or Mrs. Bartlet is back in New Hampshire trying to maintain a medical practice and a private life. Leo and Jenny have separated, and I doubt they'll get back together. Toby is a bitter divorced man who still wears his wedding ring." She was ticking them off on her fingers. "Josh..."

Sam was glad to interrupt her. "Josh is the exception. He and Mandy got together."

"And look how it turned out Sam. It was a disaster. They tried to force people to take sides. Neither of them have found anyone meaningful since."

He winced knowing what was coming next. "And then there's you. You get picked up, have a one night stand."

"I didn't intend it to be C.J.", he tried to defend himself.

"But it was or should be because she's a ..." C.J. hesitated over the term, "...a call girl."

"What about Mallory?"

"Yes, what about her? She holds your encounter with the call girl over your head. The two of you haven't been able to even agree enough on anything to go out to dinner."

"She kissed me."

"And what happened next?"

"Nothing.", he admitted.

"I rest my case."

"You're not a lawyer."

"And I don't play one on TV either. But I can see you're as pathetic as I am, as all of us are. We're not shining examples of having it all or even half of it."

"Maybe you're right C.J. That's why you have to set the example, break the pattern, get a life."

"What makes you think I can do it?"

"Someone wants to help you get there, Danny."

"Not anymore."

"How do you know if you don't try?"

"It won't work. I hurt him. Danny won't want me back and if he did, then I'd lose at work. You can't have it all, that's what I've learned." Her voice was sad and her resolve crumbled. C.J. began to cry and hated herself for showing what she saw as weakness. She looked around in a panic. "Where is the damn box of tissues?"

Sam put down his wine glass and dug in his pocket. He handed her a snow white handkerchief. C.J. was surprised by the gesture. "I haven't seen a man carry one of these in years."

"My Grandfather said a gentleman always carries one for a lady's use." Sam told her sheepishly.

"He'd be proud of you. I hate to cry."

"It's okay to do it."

"You'll have quite a story to tell Josh.", she said hesitantly.

"He won't hear it from me, C.J. You and I are friends. I wouldn't betray a friendship"

The tears began to flow again. "Don't be my friend Sam. I'm poison. I'm destined to live like this, like there's this giant block of ice around my heart. There's no warmth inside." C.J. started to sob now.

Sam felt helpless, instinctively he started to reach for her. He stood first, however, and took off his jacket. He sat back on the couch closer to her and pulled C.J.'s head to his shoulder.

She stiffened but as he gently held her, she eased on to his shoulder and let the tears continue. C.J. began to calm down and lifted her head. She was puzzled, "Where's your jacket?"

"I took it off before I, you know. I figured it would be easier to get make-up and mascara off a shirt."

C.J. laughed a little. "You're always so practical." She eyed the shoulder. "Looks pretty good, just damp."

Sam looked at her tear stained face and felt his heart break. "What had they all done to her?", he thought. He took the handkerchief to dab at a tear. They were still falling.

Sam reached in to kiss her forehead lightly. He held her hands in one of his and put his other hand behind her head. He kissed C.J.'s closed eyelids and the tracks of tears on her cheeks. To continue to comfort her, he leaned in and gently kissed her mouth. "You taste salty.", he said softly.

He leaned in to kiss her again. As he did, C.J.'s body let out a hiccupping breath. She lurched toward him and her mouth was slightly open so when he made contact it was a deeper kiss. This taste was of salty tears, fruity wine and a mysterious female essence.

It stirred something in Sam that made him stop thinking of C.J. as a co-worker. This was a woman worth exploring. His mouth moved away and came back quickly to linger near hers. When there was no objection, he began to kiss her again.

Her mind went from numb to comforted to curious. Sam's lips were soft but the texture carried a note of danger. As he continued to move his lips on hers, C.J. freed one of her hands from him to stop this.

The thought of pushing him away evaporated. Instead, she caressed his face and felt a bit of stubble. It jolted her and moved Sam from a gentleman co-worker to an exciting, masculine stranger. Her response to the kisses became more eager.

C.J. tentatively ran her tongue over his lips. The sensation thrilled both of them and now their tongues and teeth added pleasure to what their lips were doing. The effects were dizzying as they both began to relax. Then, C.J. moaned.

It was as if a switch had been thrown. They stopped and suddenly realized who they were, where they were and what they were doing.

Sam wanted to kill himself. He pulled away and said, "C.J. forgive me. I can't believe I acted like that."

She was equally mortified. "Sam, it's okay. You weren't alone. We just, I don't know got carried away, got curious, got..."

He finished for her. "...careless."

"Okay." They retreated to opposite ends of the couch.

Sam stood up. "I'd better go. Yeah, I'd better leave."

"Should I call a cab for you?" C.J. stood up too.

"No, the concierge can get me one." He grabbed his jacket, coat and brief case. She followed him to the door.

"I'm sorry, Sam. I told you I was poison. Are we okay?"

"We're fine C.J." He gave her a small smile. "We'll blame it on the booze."

"Nice try. But I don't think almost 2 glasses of wine constitutes a drunken binge."

"Then, we'll just call it a slight indiscretion, an error in judgment." He started to open the door and C.J. stopped him with a hand on his arm. Her touch startled. him.

She pointed down. "Sam, your shoes. I think you might need them."

"Oh yeah." They both bent to get them. C.J. grabbed them first, as they rose their heads hit. It was just hard enough to momentarily stun them. They hung on to each other's arms for balance. "God, I can't believe I did that. C.J. are you all right?"

"Just fine, you?" She looked at him and he nodded. They were very close again. "Well, um, good night." She started to kiss him on the cheek. Once again, their timing was off and they ended up lip to lip.

Their eyes locked and held as the kiss ended. For a second, they just stared at each other, the only noise was the pounding of their hearts. Then, she dropped Sam's shoes. He tossed his brief case, coat and suit jacket aside. Their arms wound around each other as their lips met again.

But, it wasn't relaxed this time. It was frantic, arousing passion. It wasn't enough to feel each other's lips, teeth and tongues so their hands began to roam. The room was growing hot with desire as their moans grew louder. C.J. pulled away and said, "This is no little indiscretion."

"No, it's not a small error either. Do you want a semantic debate?"

"I don't want to think at all."

"Me neither C.J., me neither."

C.J. started to lead him down a hall. They began to shed clothes as they traveled its length. The short journey was interrupted by kisses, but no more words.

They made it to the bedroom and they shed the last of their clothes. In the dark room, they stood naked holding on to each other's arms, looking into each other's eyes for some signal. Sam recognized they were in the guest room and somehow that bothered him.

But before he could say anything their eyes met. This was the time to step back, cool things off, ward off catastrophe. They both moved to speak when their bodies took over. There was a shift and instead of drawing apart, an aroused Sam's shaft touched an aroused C.J.'s center. He groaned, she gasped and their fate was sealed.

They drew together and then Sam pushed C.J. onto the bed. No words, no looks of passion, no tender caresses; just raw sex. He pushed into C.J. and found her open, hot and wet. His body took over, moving inside her. She closed around him pulling him deeper into her center.

The rhythm grew faster and more frantic as they climbed toward a desperate climax. Even as their bodies began to go over the edge, their minds knew it was an empty, soulless satisfaction. But for the moment, neither cared.

Afterward, as their hearts began to slow, they did care. Sam rolled off C.J. and lay on his back staring at the ceiling. She did the same. They both shivered, the room was cold. Who would speak first? Sam did. "May I get you a blanket?"

"No thank you. I'll open the vent. I keep the heat off in here since it's not used." Her voice strained to sound matter of fact.

"I can do it." His tone was polite.

"It's all right." She went to the vent and opened it. He felt the whoosh of heat into the room but knew it would take awhile to warm up. Sam threw back the covers on the bed and climbed in. C.J. did the same. But they stayed on the outside edges of the bed. They both pondered the empty feeling inside after their frenzied mating. The room was warming but they both still felt cold inside and out.

Sam was wondering how soon he could leave and what he could say. C.J. was wondering how soon she could get rid of him and what she could say. She thought longingly of a hot bubble bath, maybe it would soothe the hurt she felt and warm her on the inside. It was her refuge these days.

Sam had to do something. He slipped out of the bed and announced, "I'm getting some water. I'll bring some for you." C.J. nodded and watched as he paused in the doorway to retrieve his boxers. He put them on and left the guest bedroom.

At first, it made her smile, then the tears came. If they'd been truly intimate, he wouldn't have felt the need to cover up. It was yet another sign they'd simply used each other, not shared with each other. She heard Sam coming back and turned toward the wall so he didn't see the tears.

He came in quietly in case she was asleep. If that was the case he could leave but Sam knew he'd have to leave some kind of note, some kind of explanation. He took her place in bed and found it still warm. Sam sighed and opened a bottle of water. He took a drink and eyed C.J.'s back. In other cases he would press the cold bottle against a woman's back to get her attention. But this wasn't that kind of intimacy.

"Hey.", he called softly. "Are you awake?"

"Yes."

"Want some water? She turned back to face him and he handed her an unopened bottle of water. C.J. took it, looked at it and laughed without humor. "C.J., what's the joke I'm missing?"

"Us. And this mess we've made. You bring two bottles of water, put on your boxers as you leave."

"I don't understand."

"There's no closeness. You're not comfortable with me, you won't even share a bottle of water with me now. We've shared more than that at work. But since we didn't share ourselves, why should you?"

"You're right. But I'm not the only one. Is that why you brought us to the guest room so it wouldn't be too personal?"

"I guess we have something in common."

"Our need?"

"No Sam, it was more like neediness and that as we found out is hollow and unsatisfying."

"C.J., I don't know how else to say I'm sorry. It shouldn't have turned out like this. I just wanted to be there for you, I wanted us to melt some of that ice you said was inside you."

She smiled ruefully, "It didn't work. But, it's not all your fault. We're both responsible, I'm sorry too. It was very kind of you." Her tone was tired, sad and resigned. C.J. turned away from him.

Sam thought again, "What have we done to you?" He hadn't been fair to her, maybe he could repair that. Sam put his bottle of water down and noticed a candle and matches on the night stand. He stood up and slipped off his boxers. He lit the candle. When C.J. heard the match strike she looked back at him, "Sam?"

"Could we switch sides?" She was puzzled but complied. He went around the bed and climbed in next to her. "The candle light flatters you more than me."

"Thank you." It came out haltingly.

Sam reached over and took her water bottle. He placed it on the night stand and took a deep breath. "Let me make it up to you, C.J."

"Make what up, Sam?"

"My bad manners."

"Sam, we were both willing participants. You don't have to feel responsible." She shifted toward him and the covers slid down. He was transfixed by an expanse of her pale skin.

Without pausing to think or ask permission, he let his fingers trail over her shoulder and down her arm. C.J. sucked in her breath in astonishment. Sam kept stroking her shoulder and said, "Your skin is beautiful, so pale, so soft, like silk."

"What are you doing?"

"I'm touching you C.J. I'm exploring. Please let me." He moved his fingers across her chest just above her breasts to trace the line of her other shoulder. She shivered. He bent to kiss her shoulder and promised in a whisper, "It'll be better this time."

"You don't owe me anything, you don't have to."

"I want to C.J. please, let me." Sam was over her now.

C.J. looked into his eyes and found her mind going blank. "What?"

"What's wrong?"

"Your eyes Sam. I could drown in them. Blue is a cool color. But not on you." She moved a hand to his face. "They're like a warm tropical sea. I want to dive in."

"Go ahead. " He moved her hand to his mouth and kissed the palm shifting her gaze. Sam raised her arm up to kiss the inside skin toward the elbow. He sighed at the softness, she sighed at the sensation.

C.J. closed her eyes and heard him say, "Look at me. I want to watch your reactions." She focused on him again. But her eyes rolled back when he began to use his tongue on the same stretch of skin. C.J. wriggled at the pleasant sensation.

Sam threw back the covers to straddle her and give himself more skin to sample. C.J. noticed his skin was darker than hers from all that time in the sun while sailing. The sport made his hands slightly rough. But, it wasn't uncomfortable. It was an intriguing contrast of smooth spots and small calluses. It let him alternate between small snags on her smooth skin and silky caresses.

Every time she let her eyes close, he nudged her. She would open her eyes to find he was back over her letting her dive once again into the bright blue of his eyes. She realized it was a blue that darkened as he continued his actions. Sam moved to stroke her breasts, first lightly and then more possessively. His hand molded around them flicking the nipples and sending sensations of pleasure through her body. C.J. became aware the tides weren't centered in her breasts but between her legs. Her excitement grew.

Sam sensed this and slid his hand down to trace small circles on her stomach. Then he stroked her thighs, the creases between her legs and torso. When neither of them could bear the anticipation any more, he turned his gaze on her eyes. He brushed his hand across her center. C.J.'s eyes went dark and unfocused. Her lips parted and moans of pleasure slipped out. She reached for him.

He returned to her face and began to kiss her. She was in a dream like daze, half aroused, half asleep. But she deepened his kiss with her tongue. It was his turn to make moans of desire and pleasure.

Sam reluctantly pulled his mouth away. Sam drizzled kisses down her throat between her breasts and then on her breasts. He used his tongue to make excruciatingly slow circles around her nipples. C.J. clutched at the sheets willing him to quicken his pace. But he didn't. Instead he took a nipple in his mouth and C.J. writhed in pleasure making small incoherent sounds.

As he worked his oral magic on the nipple., he moved a hand once more between her legs. Twin waves of pleasure slammed into C.J. She found it hard to catch her breath but easy to demand, "More, please, oh God, please. Sam."

He kept his hand stroking where it was as she rocked against him. He switched his mouth to her other breast. They were small but so sensitive to his actions. Sam's glance at her eyes told him C.J. was on her way to an orgasm.

She was trying to fight it, to maintain some control. But this was too strong to swim against. As she felt the sensation taking hold she heard Sam whisper, "Go ahead. C.J. Please, let me pleasure you." It was her pleasure to stop resisting and just let go.

As her breathing returned to normal C.J. reached for Sam. He was still nuzzling her breast. She ran her fingers through his hair and he came face to face with her. She wound her arms around his neck and had her tongue in his mouth, tasting and feasting.

When he could catch a breath, he promised. "We're not done yet. You are amazing, so responsive. I'm enjoying this."

"Knock yourself out." she murmured.

"I might knock you out again."

"That's fine too. I can take it."

"Oh, really." He unhooked her arms from his neck, kissed her again then streaked his tongue from her throat to her flat stomach. Once more, he traced circles with his tongue alternating with kisses. Then he moved to the area between her knee and hip. He kissed her inner thigh nearing but never touching her velvet core. Sam gave equal attention to the other thigh. "I want all of you C.J., it's such a lovely journey."

Her mind was being wiped clean of any conscious thought. Sam moved his hands under her to squeeze and stroke her behind. As he shifted, she became aware of how aroused he was when he brushed her leg with his shaft.

One practical thought surfaced in C.J.'s head. They were bound for more intercourse. The first time they were unprotected. C.J. used the Pill but wondered if Sam should use a condom. He'd been with a hooker and even careful ones could have STDs. But how could she bring it up? A worried wrinkle crossed her forehead.

It was almost as if Sam read her mind. He noticed the worried look and went to soothe it. He used the lightest of kisses there, on her eyelids and on her lips. It was like barely being kissed and yet sampled. C.J.'s eyes fluttered, she sighed.

Sam repeated the light kiss on her lips to hear that response again. He wondered what reaction was to come, the same small kiss went on her lips, not the ones on her face but the ones at her center.

C.J. gasped and her eyes flew open. Sam looked into those storm tossed eyes and followed his instinct. He placed another tiny, sweet kiss in the same spot. C.J. whimpered this time and that was consent to Sam. Her permission gave him license to drive her crazy. C.J. knew obviously he wasn't worried about having given her an STD.

The kisses he planted between her legs deepened. She was hot, open and wet just waiting for him to taste and savor. He used his tongue to probe and pleasure. Her hands fisted in his hair drawing him in with her movements and her moans. Sam's satisfaction increased as C.J. thrashed and started to groan. Sam could tell he had her teetering on the edge of anticipation and fulfillment. He drove her over that edge relishing her panting cries of "More, yes, please, more."

**********
The fuzzy edges in her vision were slowly clearing. C.J. felt drained, limp and ready to slip into sleep. She opened her eyes to focus on Sam. He had a contented smile on his face mirroring the look on C.J.'s face. His tone bordered on smug as he announced, "We're not done yet, C.J."

"Sam, you've dissolved my bones. I can't move."

"I don't believe it. See?" He picked up her hand, kissed it and then slid it to her center. "You're still open C.J., you're waiting for more."

C.J. moaned as their hands touched her so intimately. Then, it was Sam's turn to moan when he moved C.J.'s hand to his member. She instinctively closed her fingers around him and it was her turn to explore. Sam was ready for them to be together.

He held himself over C.J. and told her, "You want me. I want you. It's out of our control. Bring me inside you, please." Sam kissed C.J. and nibbled on her lip. He bit his own lip as she rubbed him on herself. "Tell me you want me C.J."

She couldn't deny it. From the mesmerizing power of his eyes to his demanding fingers to the pull in her own center, C.J. knew there was no turning back or refusing. "I do, Sam. God."

"Say it."

"Come inside me Sam, take me."

He followed her direction and entered her. But then Sam waited, he wanted to watch and see himself reflected in her eyes. When they were on the same wave length, Sam began to climb. This time it was in long, slow strokes. It was exquisite torture for both of them. It helped build the tension.

Sam took hold of her hands, fingers intertwined. The rhythm began to change and build. He needed more. "Say my name C.J. Make this personal, make it about us."

It was easy for C.J. to grant the request. Every nerve, cell and thought centered on Sam. It was all about his eyes, his lips, the feel of him inside her. "Yes, Sam, yes. Sam, please don't stop."

It was the final note for them as the symphony of desire and passion swept them into a crescendo. Their pleasure sent them soaring and then floating slowly down to reality.

Sam didn't hurry to end their coupling this time. He was too sated to move quickly even if he wanted to. C.J. was still wrapped around him. Sam experienced the sensation of her running her nails over his back. It was sultry.
He felt himself twitch inside her. Now it was her turn to offer him a contented, smug smile.

They parted reluctantly not awkwardly. Sam lay on his back but kept a hand at her shoulder. He was in renewed contemplation of the ceiling and the evening's events. It was momentous. C.J. was an incredible woman, he never imagined such passion and responsiveness from his kind, loving friend.

His reverie was interrupted by her voice. "I wish I could tell Mandy that we were right."

"Mandy?"

"Uh-huh."

"Right about what?"

"About you."

"What about me?"

"About you and your sexual prowess."

That jolted Sam back to the moment. "Huh?" He turned toward C.J. He found her lying on her side, head propped up on one arm, looking at him. "What are you talking about?"

"I promise, I won't tell her. It's too bad in a way." C.J. had a wicked smile on her face. "We were right on target about you."

"Why would you discuss me that way?" His rich deep voice changed to a squeak.

"You were just part of the list."

"I see." But he didn't see.

C.J. took pity on him and explained. "It was late one night during the campaign. You had just come on board full time. Mandy and I were working and all the numbers started to run together and we started to giggle."

"About me in bed?"

"No. About the absurdity of wasting a Friday night studying the demographics of men when we could be with men. Then, we wondered what you guys were like in bed."

"Which guys?"

"We started with the President, he was the Governor then."

"What'd you decide?"

"I can't say."

"Can't or won't?"

"Both. Then Leo, John Hoynes, David Rosen, Toby, Josh."

"But Mandy was with Josh."

"That got a bit dicey. Mandy asked for my impressions and predictions. I gave them, she dropped a few hints as to my accuracy. We hit a snag. That's where you saved the day."

"How did I do that?"

"We suddenly remembered we hadn't wondered about you. We started with this devastating combination of dark hair and blue eyes. " C.J. ran her fingers through his hair as she continued. "We decided you'd be inventive, considerate and beautifully built."

"Thank you C.J. I'm not sure what to say. I feel like I was on display at the meat market.", he laughed nervously.

"You're top choice, prime grade Sam.", an amused C.J. now started trailing her fingers around his ear, down his jaw line and on to his chest.

"Do women talk that kind of talk a lot?"

"Yeah. It's pretty shallow but we like it. And speaking of liking things, are you liking this?" She pulled herself closer and changed from using her fingers to skimming her nails down his torso. She stopped just short of his stomach. His muscles contracted and her smile widened as she stayed on her side.

Sam was feeling like every nerve in his body was on fire. "God yes, you could say I like this. But C.J. this isn't necessary." Her nails shifted. "Neither is that. I, uh, I um, oh God what are you doing?"

C.J. had dipped her fingers below his waist and gently skimmed her nails over him. "Taking my turn at learning all about you. I'm always curious." She raised herself to satisfy her curiosity by kissing him. C.J. started with his ear, she followed the kisses with her tongue. Sam groaned with pleasure and tried to pull her to him. She resisted, distracting him with her tongue and fingers.

Those fingers mirrored his earlier movements tracing circles around Sam's nipples. It was setting off jangling fibers in his head, chest and between his legs. It intensified when she moved her mouth to his chest. She kissed him and then flicked her tongue around his nipples. Sam was torn, he wanted more but wasn't sure he could survive it.

C.J. stopped to kiss his mouth. She used her lips to suck his tongue deep inside her mouth. They were in a frenzy, desire pulling at their centers. Sam was ready to flip her over and bring himself inside her. C.J. had other ideas.

She moved a hand down between his legs and stroked his thigh. He was charmed by the touch and couldn't resist opening to give her more room. Her hand grasped him and he groaned. C.J. put herself between his legs, she took her time kissing his belly and licking his skin while her fingers played.

Sam felt the room spin. His efforts to pull her to him were futile and he didn't care. "Not yet Sam.", she teased. Not just her words teased, now her lips and tongue moved on to his inner thighs. It was Sam's turn to grab at the sheets for a lifeline. "C.J. what are you doing?" He should stop her. But he couldn't especially when she answered his question by taking him in her mouth.

Sam started to pant and roll on the bed as C.J. slid her tongue and lips over him. She took him deeply. Then room was fading out as his thoughts began to melt. When he thought he would slam into the ceiling from floating on pleasure, she mounted him.

C.J. slowly lowered herself onto him, torturing both of them. His glazed eyes drank in her long, lean body as it absorbed him inch by inch. She leaned in allowing him to use his hands to fondle her breasts. Then C.J. arched her body back and began to ride him.

"C.J. don't stop. I want you." Sam lost the power of speech except for delirious, delighted sounds of passion. He tried to hold himself back but was thrusting harder inside her. They both began to cry out. As the climax built it knocked C.J. toward Sam. He nested his hands in her hair and locked their mouths together. The kiss swallowed the screams of pleasure pounding in them as the orgasm erupted.

They slept exhausted, not tangled up as lovers but close enough to be aware of another person's warmth within touching distance. They slept soundly.

******
Sam woke several hours later to the smell of coffee. He was alone in the bed. The memories of the hours before rushed into his head. He and C.J. had to face each other, here and at the White House. But the pleasure they'd experienced after the initial disaster made him smile.

Then real life intruded. He dragged a hand through his mussed up hair. "What will I say to her?", he wondered quietly as he noticed his clothes piled on a bedroom chair.

"How about good morning.?" C.J. came in wearing a robe and carrying two mugs of coffee. "Here."

"Thanks. Good morning." He sipped the coffee and said "Mmmmm." After that he didn't know what to say. "C.J. we have to talk."

"No, we don't Sam. We both know what happened last night and this morning was a one of a kind event. It won't be repeated."

"You're so calm about this C.J. We broke every rule of friendship and co-workerdom. That means nothing?"

"It means everything Sam, like last night did, the good and the bad. I love you but it's like a friend. I need you as a friend and you will always be a valued co-worker. You made me see that. Do you want to make an issue out of this and change everything?"

"Everything is changed."

"Not if we don't allow it to be changed."

"I just don't want you hurt."

"I'm a grown up Sam and there are lots of ways for me to get hurt. Having to give up my work, you having to give up your work, anyone finding out about us, this, whatever."

Sam smiled in relief. "I'm glad you're a little rattled C.J. I was starting to feel like I was the only one freaked out."

"I admit it's a little, okay, a lot strange. But I've had my first cup of coffee, an extra hour to think about this and I'm dressed, sort of."

"That helps?" She nodded. Sam continued. "What time is it anyway?"

"It's nearly 6. There are fresh towels in the bathroom for a shower. Do you want breakfast?"

"No. I have a meeting on the Hill. I'll get fed there and I'll go home to shower and change before then. Are you all right with that?"

"Fine, if that's what works best."

"There is something personal C.J. We were pretty impetuous last night and I should have insisted on..." Sam hesitated, "...precautions."

"I could have insisted too. Not to worry Sam, I take the Pill. We're fine in that regard."

"And just so you don't worry, I had a check up after I was with Laurie. I'm healthy, I'm clean. You didn't bring it up but I wouldn't want you to worry."

"Thank you Sam. It did cross my mind. You keep proving what a valuable friend you are, like now, like last night."

He gave her a steady look.

"I didn't just mean the physical", she added. "It was the fact you cared enough to remind me I have friends. You helped me feel warmer and more alive at least for a time. Now get dressed."

"You make dynamite coffee, C.J."

"Just one of my many talents." she told him as she left the room.

"Don't I know it.", he thought to himself.

**********
A dressed Sam found C.J. sitting at the table reading, her lap top already open. "We look good on the Transportation Bill. You should know that going to the Hill."

"Got it. C.J., you sure we're okay?"

"As much as we're going to be. It all stays here Sam unless you take it outside. I wasn't the only one in pain. You were searching for something too, acceptance, release, a chance to be a knight in shining armor."

It hit Sam, she was right. He thought he'd done her a favor. But C.J. had given him something too, something missing in his life. Something he wanted more of that would last.

"One more personal question C.J."

She said curiously, "Okay."

"Where is the Goldfish Danny gave you?"

C.J. smiled slightly. "She's fine Sam. Gail is getting along swimmingly."

"Are you sure? You're not just saying that to reassure me."

"Sam, I saw her this morning. She's in my bedroom."

"I'm glad C.J. Tell her we miss her and all her accouterments. Your desk is too empty now."

"No problem. Go." C.J. pointed to the door but stayed where she was. "No use tempting fate", she thought.

"Good-bye". Sam had the door open and paused, "C.J. ?"

"Yes Sam?"

"Next time you need a shoulder to cry on..."

"Thank you, Sam."

He continued as if she hadn't spoken, "Call Josh or someone else. I know call Danny. He looks like he has broad shoulders. I don't think I could trust myself or you." He made that his exit line.

She was stunned by his answer. But it made sense and was worth thinking about.

**********
C.J. walked into the West Wing carrying a large shopping bag. Carol was at her desk but offered nothing more than a greeting. It was the safest path until she gauged C.J.'s mood.

Her boss entered her office and called for Carol. Carol brought the day's calendar and stopped in surprise in the doorway. C.J. was putting a throw back in place on the couch and the candy jar back on the coffee table.

She looked at Carol and said, "How do we look around lunch time?"

"Nothing happening, what do we need to do?"

"We need to do lunch Carol. You've done yeoman's duty of late and I haven't thanked you. Let's sneak out to eat."

"Okay." A leery Carol wondered how long this would last but was glad to see C.J. in a good mood. Maybe she had turned the corner on her problems. Carol was rooting for C.J. to have it all including Danny Concannon. "Briefing in 5 minutes C.J., then Staff after that because of Sam's meeting on the Hill and Josh at Defense."

C.J. jumped a bit at the mention of Sam's name but chased last night's memories away. "Time to focus on today and the future.", she reminded herself. She grabbed her Briefing gear and went to the podium. It was uneventful and quick. As had become his pattern, Danny asked his questions without looking at C.J. Today, she willed him to glance at her. She stared so long at him when the Briefing ended, he finally did catch her eye. C.J. smiled at him, a shy, tremulous little smile but a smile.

He looked back in shock and then checked the row behind him to see who she was smiling at. C.J. understood his confusion. She nodded at him and kept the smile in place a moment longer. Danny shook his head and walked away. C.J. realized it would take awhile to reach him. But the thaw that brought on Spring was usually gradual, C.J. was proof of that.

**********
Sam cruised through the door of the West Wing at the same time C.J. was crossing to Leo's office. "Oh, hi C.J." Sam felt confusion as he looked at her.

"Hello Sam. How was the Hill?" She swallowed a nervous laugh.

"We're in the driver's seat."

"Leo will be pleased."

Josh barreled up behind them and put an arm around each of them. "Hey, you two look thick as thieves. What's going on?"

"Just bringing C.J. up to date."

"On what?"

"The Hill, it's good."

"And I was a hit, no 'da bomb' at Defense."

"Modest as always Josh.", C.J. teased.

"So you guys lit out early last night. Did you have a good time?"

"What have you heard?" Sam changed his tone, "I mean, we had drinks."

"That's it?"

"What else could there be Josh?" Sam fought to keep panic out of his voice. C.J. watched silently.

"You didn't even buy her dinner? I'd show you a better time C.J."

"I doubt that", Sam said under his breath.

Josh continued, "Is something wrong?" He sensed tension and eyed them suspiciously. "Did something happen? "

"All right, I'll confess." C.J. went for broke knowing Josh. "We had drinks, we talked about our wretched personal lives and ended up in bed. We had passionate sex all night long into this morning. I can barely walk."

Sam looked stunned but also felt proud. "She can barely walk.", he crowed to himself.

"Okay, whatever." Josh adopted a kidding tone obviously not believing them. "Fine, don't tell me."

"I just did." C.J. was on a roll. Josh continued to look disbelieving so C.J. gave him what he wanted. "I told him to call Mallory and get something going. He told me to lighten up." She walked away after squeezing Sam's arm and kissing him on the cheek."

Sam was amazed and called after her, "I'm getting French fries with my lunch." He heard her laugh.

Josh was watching her too. "Imagine if she were serious, what would it be like to be in bed with her?"

"Something to imagine, indeed.", Sam deadpanned.

"Probably incredible."

"Well, she's an incredible woman. Let's go to Staff and then I have a phone call to make."