Megumin had done a lot of stupid things in her life,almost breaking her neck jumping out of a tree,placing firecrackers under her teacher's seat in highschool because they dared to mock "Explosion magic,and finally wasting her college food money on firecrackers and cosplay material to "unleash her true potential".
But the stupidest idea she had so far was going to a stripclub she had found in hopes she could get some free food. Now at this point you may be rightfully wondering why the hell would she be doing this and to answer this we need to go back a little bit back in time
Megumin had managed to get into college despite her family's poor absolute dog shit financial condition with a scholarship thanks to her amazing grades and scores...despite her oddities of being a chunibuyo at 18 years old. Anyhow after reaching her college Megumin was struck with the realizations that while she wouldn't have to pay a cent for tuition or books...she still had to worry about food.
So she went and got herself a part time job at a local fast food place and when she received her first pay check she immediately wasted most of it on fire crackers and cosplay material despite her roommate/rival/friend Yunyun's advice leaving her with almost no money for food
That's leads us to current day where we join Megumin walking towards the strip club with a plan to get passed the bouncer who went by Darkness who was a tall blonde woman who most definitely lifted.what was her master plan you might be asking? taking a page from the legendary "Solid Snake" Megumin had brought one of her boxes as the perfect sneaking tool to get past her
Darkness looked on in pure dumbfounded as she saw a cardboard box slowly shuffle its way towards her in the most pathetic thing she's seen in a good while when the cardboard box finally reached close enough to her feet she flipped it over to find a small girl laying under it.After one of the most cringeworthy introductions she has ever heard, Darkness now out of fucks to give just lets Megumin in without an ID check and thus phase one of Megumin's plan had succeeded
Inside the Strip club it was dark illuminated only by neon light with scantily clad women dancing with tons of drunk and horny men happy to throw money them. Megumin had to remind herself why she was here before immediately getting distracted by a large group that had gathered near an empty darkened stage when she had asked what the hell they were standing around for one of the men their claimed they were here for "Kazunetta" before Megumin could ask who that was the stage became illuminated as a voice came over the speakers
Enticing,mysterious,and slightly sadistic please give a warm welcome for Kazunetta!
As the crowd when absolutely wild with cash in hand ready,but Megumin was dead quite for the first time in her life as she saw the dancer walk foward. she had immediately fell in love with their looks with their slim yet curvaceous firgure(that the chest was oddly flat compared to every one else)that was only complicated by the tight leather suit they were wearing,and their green eyes which seemed to pierce the room only emphasized more with a sexy looking pair of glasses along with cherry red lips that were sucking on a lollipop ,it was safe to say Megumin was 10000% starstruck and may be in love
As the music started to play the dancer started to slowly,yet sexily dance their way around the pole and Megumin's eyes were glued to them for the entire ride as more of the audience started to throw more money onto the stage "Kazunetta" started to slowly unzip their bodysuit to reveal a dark green lingerie and as Megumin saw them grind their body against the pole they were dancing on not even she could resist joining the crowd in their horny cheers for the dancer and as the song came to a close "Kazunetta" gave one last wink to the audience before walking off stage
As some of the audience members argued who the dancer was winking to,Megumin now remembering her original goal now made her way to the bar in hopes of getting her free food. As soon as she saw the bar tender leave to go on break Megumin immediately set the next phase of her plan into action. As she snuck her way behind the counter Megumin slowly realized that it there wouldn't be food here and that she's in the wrong place,but before she could get away completely she heard a voice eerily close to her
"My I should really tell Darkness she's doing a terrible job at keeping the pest out"
Megumin turned her head around slowly only to find herself face to face with "Kazunetta" or at least to their stomach. Regardless Megumin face turned a tomato red she choked on her words for the next few moments until she finally managed to say
"I-I am n-no pest I'AM MEGUM-"
she was cut off by the dancer placing a gloved finger on her lip and saying
"This place isn't for middle school brats like yourself you should really be calling your Mommy to come pick you up"
"I'm in college you ass"
"Oh sorry my mistake it's just that the way you were crawling around like a rat I just couldn't tell"
Megumin made a rude gesture at "Kazunetta" before trying to walk away...keyword being trying as she found the dancer could easily pick her up and was placing her down on one of the bar stools before she could ask what they were doing the dancer responded with
"I still caught you trying to steal behind the counter...but I'm not really one to snitch and judging with how thin you look you must be hungry right? So if you...entertain me I'll be more than happy to buy you something to eat how does that sound dear?"
Megumin nodded in agreement before "Kazunetta" first asked
"So what do you study in college?"
Megumin gave a small yet cocky laugh before saying
"I am studying to become the world's greatest archwizard!!!!"
"Please when I told you to entertain me I didn't mean tell me your cringy middle school fanfiction"
"I'm studying to become a chemist"
The dancer seemed satisfied with the answer and when the bartender came back from his break "Kazunetta" asked for a burger for the young girl next to him and a margarita Megumin quickly told the dancer that she couldn't drink before they scoffed before saying that it wasn't hers anyway
when their orders came Megumin was practically drooling and devoured the burger plus the fries in seconds as she finished "Kazunetta" took small sip from their drink before asking something they were curious about
"So...why did you come here anyway? you don't really seem like the type that usually come here?"
"Food"
Megumin said with with some of the meal still in her mouth
"Swallow before you speak dear and the food here is terrible and really no better than your average pub"
Megumin swallowed the last remaining bits of her food before replying
"Yeah,but I'm kinda...financially challenged at the moment"
"Kazunetta" looked at the girl's odd getup and replied with a simple
"Yeah I can see why"
a few moments passed and as the dancer finished their drink a smile filled with lust before asking Megumin one final question
"Hey...how would you like if I..showed you a good time...free of charge for someone so cute of course"
Megumin,now with her face turning bright red again tried to speak
"W-We-Wh-Arent we both uh...girls?"
"Kazunetta" gave a sharp laugh at what Megumin said before replying to her with
"Well...if it makes you comfortable dear...I'm not a woman"
Megumin choked on herbown words in shock before the dancer replied with
"Yep I'm a man...now will you let me show you a good time?"
Megumin just let "Kazunetta" take her to a private booth away from the stages and as soon as she sat down "Kazunetta" slowly unzipped his body suit to reveal his dark green lingerie before moving his body onto Megumin's lap wrapping his legs around her back,thanks to him being surprisingly light he didn't make the girl feel uncomfortable and started to slowly grind against her lap
Megumin felt herself growing more and more excited and when the dancer noticed he gave her a a deep kiss with his tongue passionately touching hers and when he separated from her he left the girl breathless with a salavia trail now hanging out of her mouth "Kazunetta" wasn't down yet and before she could fully recover went straight for her neck and started to gently bite and suck on it.all Megumin could do was moan in pleasure as the dancer kept sucking on her neck and when he finally let go he smiled in satisfaction knowing it would leave a nice mark the next morning this process of grinding,kissing,and hickey repeated itself a couple of times until the dancer finally got up from Megumin's lap and started putting the bodysuit back on
Megumin now a complete mess covered in lipstick marks with salvia still hanging out of her mouth asked why it was over "Kazunetta" gave a response of
"Sorry dear this is as much as I can do..plus you should probably get going it's late and it's still a school night"
Megumin now being down bad horrendously for the dancer asked a question
"Can I see you again"
"Kazunetta" pondered the question for a moment before grabbing a napkin and writing something down on it before handing it to the girl
"Of course you can dear..just make sure to bring something for me next time alright?"
and with those final words "Kazunetta" gave one last gentle kiss to Megumin before the girl walked out of the club. Megumin was feeling like she had gotten her heart broken until she decided to check her pockets to see what the dancer had given her and when she did...whoo boy she was acting like she had won a million bucks on the small napkin was the dancers phone number and a note that read
"Come visit me soon my little kitty kat,"
with much love,
Kazuma "Kazunetta" Satou
and that night Megumin walked back to her dorms with her head up high