A/N: Hey guys! This is a fanfic request starring Mihono X Yui (along with Kanami and Hiyori just being another pair of characters who I thought essential for the story). I wrote this as a late birthday gift for my good friend, Jed Dela Cruz, another TnM fan with who I collaborate on YouTube. This is the first time I've ever written a ship story that wasn't Kanami X Hiyori, so I hope you all enjoy it!
IMPORTANT: This takes place after Mihono and the entire gang learn Kanayamahime is in Mihono's body, and before Mihono's imprisonment in Takirihime's chamber. They also don't know yet that Kanayamahime is good.
What We Once Were
Nightfall was descending upon the sleepy peaceful Nara farmlands, casting a pale mist that shrouded like a blanket for miles. Deep within the countryside, far from the other scattered houses around the area, were only a few weak lights just strong enough to glow in the murkiness. They pierced through the shoji paper doors and windows of the Hiiragi Family's ancestral home. It was a humble building—the picturesque example of a traditional Japanese house, complete with tatami mat flooring, sliding doors, and a wooden engawa veranda. Though it was constructed hundreds of years ago, it was sturdy and had served the Hiiragi Family well for several generations.
Including the last Hiiragi descendant of all, Juujou Hiyori.
But for the first time in many years, the Hiiragi Family home was abuzz with animated chatter. Having stood empty ever since Hiyori moved into the care of her guardian, President Gojou, the house had lost all sounds and traces of life. Now, it seemed more lively than ever before, its small space overcrowded with those now almost like second-family to the once lonely Hiyori.
"Pillow fight!" Kanami shrieked, attacking her closest victim, who just so happened to be Kaoru.
Caught off guard by the assault, the pink-haired loli stumbled back crashing into Kofuki, who unfortunately was eating a pudding. The collision caused the grey-haired Renpu Toji to fall forward, her face smacking into the dessert.
"Okay, Kanami...you asked for it," Kaoru snarled, grabbing a pillow of her own.
"Uh...oops." A drop of sweat appeared upon her brow at the sight of the two girls with fire in their eyes. Kanami made a beeline for it, her pair of pursuers hot on her tail.
"No running in the kitchen, you three!" Mai chided, when they nearly sent her, Kiyoka, and a tray of freshly-baked cookies flying.
It was Mirja who was forced to maintain order before Hiyori had second thoughts about letting them have a sleepover at her residence. A night like this when they could just act their age and have fun was a luxury they could rarely afford. As Tojis, they sacrificed normal lifestyles for ones of armed services, bound by vows to protect the innocent, fight for justice, and risk their lives to save those of others. However, despite this golden opportunity of fun, Mirja knew it was no excuse to go completely wild.
"You three, restrain your behaviour, please!"
It was clear her order went completely ignored, especially once Yui decided to join in on the fun, almost knocking her over. In the perverted Toji's mind, a pillow fight was synonymous with also getting freaky in the sheets.
"Ooh! Pillow fight! Yay!" Ellen cheered.
Within seconds, white feathers were flying everywhere into the air like snowflakes drifting down to the earth. When Hiyori came downstairs, she could not help recoiling back in her shock. She only went up to her bedroom for five minutes and the living room had been tidy, just the way she liked it. It seemed even five minutes was long enough for her friends to make a total mess of the place. Blowing a strand of black hair from her face in irritation, Hiyori told herself to suck it up. Her friends could be excitable, yes—perhaps a bit too excitable—but they were responsible when the situation called for it. Hiyori knew that they'd clean the mess up themselves afterwards.
Besides, it had been so long since laughter was heard in this lonely house. Ever since her parents passed away, leaving her an orphan, Hiyori had almost forgotten what happiness looked and sounded like. Her house, which held so many memories, became like a stranger to her, destitute of the love of her family.
But now...she had a new family. And her heart grew warm at seeing new memories being made in this once solitary dwelling. There was no room for annoyance or frustration.
Smiling, Hiyori walked through her property, relishing the sight of her friends. Kanami, Kaoru, Kofuki, Ellen, and Yui still playfully beat each other with any pillows that hadn't lost their feathers. Strict and authoritative Mirja vainly tried to restore some sense of discipline in them with Chie coming to her rescue. Mai, Kiyoka, and Sayaka whipped up another batch of cookies.
Only one person was missing.
'Where's Mihono?' Hiyori thought, her eyebrows now creased into a frown.
Her house being small, she did not have to look for long. Outside on the engawa, gazing up towards the luminous moon, was the young Minoseki Toji.
"Mihono?"
Stirring at the Heijou Toji's voice, the younger girl turned around. "Oh, Juujou-san. I'm sorry. I didn't see you."
"What are you doing out here? It's chilly and you'll catch a cold. Come inside," Hiyori said.
"I-I think I'd rather stay here, Juujou-san," Mihono replied, looking away.
"Mihono? What's wrong?"
"Nothing," Mihono said, a little too quickly. "I just need fresh air and—some time alone."
Hiyori wasn't falling for it, but she also knew better than to push upon the matter. She was fully aware of what Mihono was going through and understood why the Minoseki Toji would prefer solitude at present. Still, she didn't want Mihono to feel like she had to go through this alone. Hiyori knew the dangers of being isolated and forlorn with one's own thoughts. When she went through the same situation as Mihono, she had been all by herself in the wooded wilderness of the mountains, begging, pleading for some almighty power to just let her die. Hiyori did not want the same thing happening to Mihono.
Clearing her throat, she said, "Well...okay, but if you need anything, I'm always willing to talk. Just don't stay out here too late."
"T-Thanks, Juujou-san."
When she heard the sliding door close, Mihono hugged her knees close to her chest and let the tears she had been holding in fall down her cheeks. Hiyori wouldn't understand. Nobody would. None of them had a great aradama inside them, waiting to burst forth uncontrollably. In all honesty, Mihono had not wanted to come here in the first place. However, Chie, Kiyoka, and Yui had pleaded and pleaded so hard for her to join them that she had no choice but to reluctantly relent.
Mihono tried to show courage. After all, where there was a will, there was a way—just as she'd always say. But this time...Mihono didn't think there was one. Every time she'd smile when her friends gave her support, she secretly felt like crying. She was a danger to them all. She was a danger to everyone on this planet. How could they all still treat her with the same kindness as though nothing was wrong when she could at any moment lose control and consume them all in flames? Already she had nearly hurt those she cared about.
Only monsters did stuff like that. That's what she was.
'I'm a monster...'
"Mihono-chan, you can use the bathroom now," Chie said as she walked out, drying her long blue hair with a towel.
"Thanks, Chi-nee."
The water in the bathtub was still hot when Mihono gently eased her body inside. Shuddering, she hugged herself remembering the excruciating pain of being burned in her nightmares. It was an unforgiving heat unlike any other, the worst agony she ever experienced. Every night now, Mihono was scared of falling asleep for fear she'd be once again trapped in that torturous world. The flames of the great aradama inside her licking around her...scalding her fragile body...turning her skin black and exposing her bones...
"Mihono-chan? Are you done in there yet?" Yui's voice called out.
Coming back to her senses, Mihono realized she had been hyperventilating and had dug her fingernails so hard into her arms that they had torn skin, leaving traces of blood. Yui could not see this! Desperately trying to regain control of her breathing, the Minoseki Toji quickly stumbled out of the bathtub, taking care to not drip blood anywhere.
"Mihono-chan? You've been in there for quite a while now. Are you okay?"
"I-I'm fine! Totally fine!"
"Are you sure? I'm coming in, alright?"
"Wait! Yui, don't—"
But it was too late. Red blushes that were hotter than the steaming room they were in appeared on the girls' faces at the awkward situation. Mihono had managed to wrap a towel around her shoulders, so thankfully Yui did not catch sight of her scratched-up arms. However, the same couldn't be said for...the rest of her.
"U-Uh...sorry," Yui apologized, before closing the door.
Mihono's heart was racing a mile every second so fast that she thought it would literally burst out of her chest. What was this? What was going on? Yui's reaction had just been so...un-Yui-like. Mihono would have expected the Ayanokouji Toji's nose to be gushing blood, her eyes sparkling, and drool coming out of her mouth.
"Uh, sorry," was not what Mihono thought she'd hear from Yui's lips either. She'd have imagined Yui saying something like, "Mihono-chan, why didn't you ask me to take a bath with you? I could have helped scrub every part of that drop-dead gorgeous body of yours beforehand!"
Her breathing erratic once again, Mihono tried to dry her body and clear her mind. Still, one thought could not escape her.
'Nobody had ever looked at me like that before...'
After drying herself off and bandaging up her arms with the gauze she found in the bathroom cabinet, Mihono dressed in her pyjamas before joining the others. Most of them were also dressed in their nightwear, save for Yui who now rose to take her turn for washing up. She and Mihono avoided eye contact as they passed by each other.
"Oi, Mihocchi! We're gonna watch a movie on Chichie's laptop. Wanna join us?" Kofuki asked, her mouth full of chips.
"N-No, thanks. Where's Kanami and Juujou-san?"
"They went to bed already," Ellen said.
"Yeah, probably so they could get X-rated so as to avoid waking anyone later," Kaoru snickered, making Kofuki guffaw at the lewd joke. The two were pinned down by Mai, Mirja, and Chie's death glares.
"Well, I think I'm going to turn in early too," Mihono said.
"Huh? It's only eight o'clock though," Kaoru grunted.
"Mihono-chan, are you unwell?" Chie asked.
"No, just tired. I need to hit the sack. Good night, everyone."
As Hiyori's house wasn't a mansion, guest rooms were not really a thing. The Heijou Toji absolutely forbade anyone from using her parents' former room, though a few greedy looks stared at the huge platform bed. As a result, everyone had to find their own horizontal space, sufficient enough to lay out a futon. Most of them were crammed in either the living room or the tearoom, save for Kofuki and Kaoru who wanted to sleep in the kitchen.
"In case of the need for a midnight snack," they had said.
Hiyori's room was large enough for two futons to be squeezed by her bed. So, after drawing straws, Mihono and Yui were the ones who got to share one of the biggest rooms with her—and Kanami, who wanted to with her girlfriend, of course. Mihono didn't know whether she considered herself lucky to sleep in the only room with central heating—or unlucky, having to awkwardly lie by the bed of the two lovers.
"No funny business though, you two," Mai said to the two lovebirds beforehand.
"Yeah, we don't need the whole house hearing you going at it," Kaoru snorted.
'Not that we could though if people are in the same room as us," both of them had thought, disappointedly.
Creeping slowly down the upstairs hallway, Mihono kept her ears alert—just in case if she did hear anything...erotic. She did not want to stumble in on Kanami and Hiyori like Yui just did to her a few minutes ago. Thankfully, all was silent. Knocking softly on the Heijou Toji's door and receiving no answer, Mihono gently slid open the fusuma to see the two lovebirds sleeping peacefully together—their pyjamas still thankfully on.
Though the sight of them was cute, it was going to be weird having to sleep in the same room with Kanami and Hiyori. Mihono did not dare try guessing or even thinking about how many times they had done it in Hiyori's bed. For about a minute, she just stared down at them. Kanami had her arms protectively wrapped around Hiyori's thin body, while Hiyori's long ebony hair was spread over the pillows. Her head was nestled against Kanami's chest in the crook of her neck.
For just a brief second, Mihono wished she had someone who'd hold her the same way. How comforting it must be to feel so safe and protected at night... But that would never happen. Any hopes she could have had of the possibility were gone ever since she learned about the aradama writhing inside of her, wanting to come out.
'Go to bed, Mihono!' she scolded herself. 'Before Yui comes in and thinks you're a creep for just watching them.'
"Mm...Mihono?"
The hair on Mihono's scalp stood on end at Hiyori's groggy voice.
'Shit! She woke up!'
Lifting up only one eyelid, Hiyori did not release herself from the arms of Kanami, who was still out like a light. "I put a bucket and a bottle of water right by your futon by the way," the half-awake Heijou Toji murmured. "You'll need it..."
"Uh...yeah. Thanks." But Hiyori didn't hear her; she was asleep again.
Getting under the fluffy duvet covers, the Minoseki Toji forced her eyes to stay open. 'Don't fall asleep. Don't fall asleep. Don't...fall...asleep...'
It was hot! Too hot! Mihono wanted to cry out, but even breathing was nearly beyond the bounds of possibility. As if the heat wasn't harrowing enough, the smoke was literally hell, threatening to suffocate her at any moment. With each intake of the toxic air, her lungs screamed in protest, feeling like they were actually being roasted. Her throat and nose were raw with her coughing, dying for some oxygen. She had to find a way out! But all around her, all Mihono could see were walls of flames, bearing an unnatural height and heat. She was trapped.
Discomfort now turned to distress once searing pain shot through her entire body, as the fire licked all around her. Falling to her knees, Mihono bent over, tears squeezing out of her eyes and blood being retched from her stomach.
"H-Help me!" she managed to scream out. She immediately regretted it once another wave of convulsions came over her.
Wanting nothing more than to die—anything but suffer this pain—Mihono whimpered, "K-Kanayamahime...what do you want with me?"
No answer.
"Are you just trying to take over my body? Turn me into a monster?"
Still no reply.
Eventually, the inferno was too much for her. Just before the blaze consumed her, Mihono let out one last scream of despair.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"
"Mihono, wake up! Wake up!"
"Mihono-chan!"
Helplessly staring at the girl tossing and turning in her sleep, sweating all over, Kanami, Hiyori, and Yui desperately tried shaking her awake. Anything to free her from that horrible world. Eventually, with a gasp, Mihono's eyes shot open, all red and rimmed with tears.
Just before any of them could say anything, Mihono's stomach made a loud gurgling sound and Hiyori pushed the bucket to her just in time. Coughing from the acid that had been expelled from her stomach, Mihono gratefully accepted the water bottle Hiyori then gave her, gulping the liquid contents as though she'd never see water again. "H-How did you know?"
"I had nightmares too after Ichikishimahime merged with me," the Heijou Toji said. "I wasn't lying when I once told you that I understand your unease."
"Mihono-chan, do you feel better now? Are you alright?" Kanami asked worriedly.
But all she got was silence.
Seeing as Kanami got no response, Yui decided to try herself at breaking through her teammate's shell. "Mihono-chan, it's okay to talk to us. We're—"
Before she could finish her sentence, Mihono clung onto her like a vice, wrapping her arms tightly around her. Judging by how she could feel something wet dripping onto her shoulder, Yui could tell her teammate was crying. Wordlessly, Kanami and Hiyori joined in the hug, the latter more awkwardly than the rest. For a couple of minutes, none of them said anything, only listening to Mihono's sniffles and hiccups.
Choking a little, Mihono eventually wiped her tears and pulled away. "Thank you. I'm sorry, everyone."
"No need to apologize for anything, Mihono-chan," Yui assured.
"It isn't your fault," Kanami agreed.
"I-I didn't wake anyone else, did I?" Mihono asked, worriedly.
"No, they're still asleep," Hiyori said.
Relief swept over Mihono. She felt bad enough waking up three of her friends and making them all concerned. She didn't need anyone else worrying for her sake.
"I'm just so afraid of hurting you guys." More tears squeezed out of Mihono's watery eyes, as she sealed her lips shut. She forced her hands into tight fists and pressed them up against her heart. If there was anything more terrifying than her nightmares of being burned by the flames, it was the thought of her friends or other innocent people being scorched by them instead. Mihono would rather suffer and die than for anyone else to. She nearly lost so much in one single day and the very thought frightened her to the core.
"I had that same fear once too," Hiyori said.
"And so did I," Yui added.
"Y-You did?" Mihono asked.
"Yeah...when Ichikishimahime forced me to merge with her, I felt as though I could lose control at any moment. I feared hurting those I loved the most," Hiyori said. "So, when I ran away to the woods, I was left all alone with my thoughts. I became angry at myself, depressed, and bitter. And those feelings made me forget that I had friends who cared about me. I just wanted to die after Origami Yukari forced me to absorb the other two aradama princesses.
"It was rough to go through, but Kanami and the others reminded me that they had my back. Kanami...she vowed to protect me, and I knew then and there that she'd love me even if I was stuck as an aradama."
"Really?"
"Yeah, and what you experienced with that nightmare and the vomiting was exactly what I went through afterwards. I hated it, but Kanami would always hold me at night and eventually, the nightmares stopped."
Mihono could not help feeling worse about that. Hiyori had someone like Kanami, loyal and true. But as for herself...she didn't have someone like that.
"That's easy for you to say," Mihono sniffed. "You have Kanami and her love, and that's great. But my love for the rest of my friends, even Chi-nee, isn't enough to quell the fears and nightmares I have. How can I carry on if even those I care about cannot help?"
"Mihono-chan..." Yui took her teammate's hand in hers. Seeing Mihono so fragile and shattered hurt her more than she ever could have imagined. Sometimes the sight of cute innocent girls shedding tears in a petty tsundere tantrum could be rather adorable. But right now, this was different—painfully different.
"After I became a Myouga Toji, my regret and self-hatred were so extreme to the brink of nearly falling off a cliff of despair. Hurting those you love is indeed a scary thing to imagine," Yui said. "But giving up isn't the answer. Just imagine all your family and friends who you'd be leaving behind if you did. Carry on for them!"
She paused, biting her lip a little in remembrance of her little sister, Miku. Sweet, tiny, innocent Miku who always cried when she cried; who was her anchor and strength; who was her one true best friend.
"And it isn't just their love who is important," Yui carried on. "Our family and friends accept us for who we are no matter what, and that's important...but it's not enough. It's honest too. You need to love and accept yourself, Mihono-chan—the good and the bad. The only way to truly be in control is to believe that the great aradama inside you doesn't define who you are. Because I—we know the real you!"
"That's right, Mihono-chan!" Kanami said.
"And we love the real you," Hiyori said. "You should too."
Mihono was lost for words from what she heard. But they seemed to work as finally, her tears stopped flowing. Embracing her in one more group hug, the group of friends shared this one tender moment of warmth together.
"Thank you, everyone," Mihono said.
"You're welcome, Mihono-chan. And again, if you ever need anything, just tell us," Kanami said.
"We should go back to bed," Hiyori said, snuggling under the covers again and beckoning to her lover. "We have to be ready in case we get another mission from Director Maniwa early in the morning."
Yui was about to go back to her own futon when she felt a tug on her pyjama sleeve. "Mihono-chan," she whispered, "what's wrong?"
"Um...c-could you sleep with me tonight? In case the nightmares come back?" the Minoseki Toji asked tentatively.
Yui gave a small smile, glad that it was too dark to see the blush she could feel forming on her cheeks. "Of course."
Tucking the thick duvet cover over both of them, Yui then soothingly brushed Mihono's hair with rhythmic motions to relax the other girl. Closing her eyes, Mihono nestled into Yui's embrace like how Hiyori would with Kanami. How safe she felt. This must be what Hiyori always felt like with her girlfriend. Mihono didn't want Yui to stop stroking her hair and she didn't. In due course, Yui's repetitive caresses calmed her down, making her fall into a dreamless sleep.
Though she didn't know it, Yui lay awake for a long time still brushing Mihono's locks and whispering, "Mihono-chan, you may not think you have anyone like how Kanami-chan and Hiyori-chan have each other. But just so you know, there's no one more willing to be by your side than me..."
A/N: And that is the end of "What We Once Were". Hope you all liked it. I left it on an ambiguous note, so readers can imagine what happens later.