A Major Change: New Surgeon at the 4077

by Parent12D

AU. Takes place within the first three seasons, where this story starts during season 2. The summary is the same as A New Face at the 4077, but with the original main crew, different dynamics, the new major interacting with different characters, and a new tent is set up specifically for the major. How will things go for him? Rated T for occasional adult content.

52. Having Fun in a Wartime Hell Hole

Alright, now readers. Here is the 52nd chapter of this story.

Now, I don't have much to say about this chapter, aside from the fact that I've spent yesterday juggling some ideas as to how this chapter should go. And I think I have somewhat of a good grasp on the setup of this chapter. This chapter seems similar to the season 5 episode 'Movie Tonight' but with several changes made to it to make it work out in Henry Blake's favor, along with the fact that Trapper is included, as is Andrew.

In this chapter, the people at the 4077 have gotten bitter and irritated from all the work that they've done, including all the casualties that they've received within the past 18 hours, some form of entertainment is revealed to be sent over there to boost everyone's spirits, a backup plan for entertainment is also setup, and some other fun stuff will occur. How will this go? Just how bitter is everyone at the M*A*S*H 4077? What is the source of entertainment exactly? And what about the backup plan in case the original form of entertainment doesn't work out? Find out right now!

---

AT THE M*A*S*H 4077 - 10:23

It was a rough and vigorous day in the M*A*S*H 4077. For the past 18 hours, the 4077th has been getting nothing but casualties every hour on the hour. Because of that, all medical staff members were required in OR, thus making it a tight shift and everyone has grown exhausted as the hours flew by. A lot of the pressure that had been put onto everyone also led to the crew becoming bitter and sour from the endless amount of work. Needless to say, there was a lot of action going on near the front that made the 4077th this busy.

Currently, the staff had no more casualties to tend to, much to their relief. Unfortunately, because of the endless hours of meatball surgeries, all available personnel had to get back into OR and clean the place up from the mess that was made, be it cleaning surgical tools, tables and gurneys, equipment, and of course, the floor. This certainly did not help their already sour moods, as they were shown frowning, some of them had their eyebrows furrowed in annoyance at this.

In particular, Hawkeye and Trapper were handling one of the surgical equipment in OR. From the looks of it, they were pretty agitated with the countless hours in OR without having any sleep.

While they were doing that, Klinger was struggling with mopping the floor in OR. The problem with that is everyone steps over the area of which he mops up. Combined with how tense everything at the 4077 has been going, this only added to his frustration.

Everyone was feeling cranky, except for Father Mulcahy, who tried to get everyone in better spirits, to no avail.

"Ah, ain't it a glorious day at the 4077," Hawkeye retorted sarcastically. "With all the casualties that we've been getting, who could have asked for anything better?"

"Hawkeye? I think you need your head examined," Trapper snorted. "It seems this hell hole is getting to you. We can thank those casualties we've been getting from the other side."

"Tell me about it," Hawkeye deadpanned. "18 full hours of nonstop casualties showing up at our doorstep, without a moment to rest. It's been over 18 hours since I got any sleep."

"You're telling me," Trapper huffed. "I haven't had a drink in over 18 hours, and by the looks of it, I really could use one right about now."

"On a brighter note, we aren't expecting any more casualties for who knows how long," Hawkeye told him.

"Careful Hawk. Don't jinx it," Trapper said. "Next thing we know, the action starts up again and we get more wounded. If we get more wounded, you'll owe me $20 and you'll have to serve me drinks."

"Don't press your luck Trap," Hawkeye snarked. "All we're doing now is cleaning up OR."

"You have a better chance at convincing me that you can join the circus that comes to Korea," Trapper didn't believe it. "In case you haven't noticed Hawkeye, we've had 9 rounds of wounded every hour on the hour."

"So that would mean that we've had 162 rounds of wounded so far," Hawkeye snorted.

"And I wouldn't be surprised if the army has enough rounds in their firearms to create more casualties from both sides," Trapper joked dryly. "Knowing the army, anything can happen, and they do love playing with their guns."

"Just like Frank," Hawkeye quirked with a dry tone.

"You know it," Trapper nodded. "As regular army as Frank Marion Burns."

Speaking of Frank, the Major entered OR and stepped on the spot that Klinger had just mopped up. Not caring if Frank outranked him, Klinger lashed out at him.

"Major!? Look what you've done!" Klinger yelled, standing up and giving Frank an angry look. "I just mopped that spot! And you ruined it by stepping on it!"

"Don't raise your voice with me, Corporal! In any case, you're doing a lousy job," Frank scowled back.

"I'll have you know that I'm doing the best job that I can do, sir," Klinger growled. "Only problem is that people like you keep stepping on it!"

"Why don't you go powder your head Corporal," Frank sneered. "Or else I'll be forced to confiscate all your dresses to be burned!"

"You wouldn't dare," Klinger glared at him.

"Try me, Corporal," Frank snarled in retaliation.

"Hey Frank, do us a favor and take a dip into the latrine," Hawkeye snorted. "Morale at the 4077th is already low as it is. We don't need you to make it any worse."

"Why don't you mind your 'own' beeswax!?" Frank barked.

"Sure Frank," Trapper shrugged sardonically. "Then when we gather up enough beeswax from the nearest forest, we'll come to you about it."

"Oh, you guys are impossible," Frank grumbled.

"We're also improbable," Hawkeye added.

"That means the same thing wisenheimer!" Frank howled.

"My point exactly Frank," Hawkeye gave him that smirk.

"Hmph," Frank huffed before stomping off to another part of the OR since he didn't want to deal with the two captains.

---

Meanwhile, Margaret had been supervising some of her nurses to make sure all medical supplies were sorted out appropriately and that the names of the tools were organized in alphabetical order. She was pretty much under the weather too like everyone else. And the way the nurses were handling the supplies didn't improve her mood one bit.

"Alright nurses, get a move on! I want to see you ladies cleaning and sorting through those surgical supplies correctly, and that's an order," Margaret commanded before noticing Baker and what she was doing wrong. "Lt. Baker!"

"Yes, Major?" Baker looked at Margaret curiously.

"You call that sorting out the tools?" Margaret asked irritably. "The forceps have to go in the bin after the clamps! And the retractors and dilators are to be placed separately! I told you that I want those in alphabetical order, and I wasn't joking! Now I want you to take out those tools and sort through them again."

"Aww, Major," Nurse Baker whined. "I haven't had any sleep. I've been at this for 18 hours. I seriously am tired ma'am."

"That's no excuse for sloppiness Baker," Margaret told her in a stern voice. "And if I hear you try to talk back to me again, I'm putting you on 'report'."

"Hey, Margaret, why don't you lay off of Baker for once? Better yet, let me take over," Hawkeye suggested. "I'm pretty sure all Baker wants is a simple mouth-to-mouth task, and with a little check-up from yours truly, she'll be feeling great again."

"Be sure to give her my regards why don't ya," Trapper told Hawkeye.

"Now look Pierce, she's my nurse, and she's my responsibility, just like the rest of the nurses," Margaret scolded him. "In any case, this is none of your business."

"You're right. What business do we have here?" Hawkeye spoke in a sarcastic tone. "Let's all head home."

"Preferably gift wrapped if necessary," Trapper added.

Margaret scowled them as she walked over there to tell them off. But of course, she walked over the part of the floor that Klinger just mopped up, getting him all fired up again.

"Major! You ruined my cleaning masterpiece!" Klinger cried in irritation. "First Major Burns messes it up, and now you!? Why don't we get the Colonel in here to mess it up!? Or even the general if we can get him over here!?"

"Why don't you go suck an egg Klinger," Margaret sneered at him.

"She should know," Trapper had that grin on his face. "Hot Lips is a natural when it comes to making eggs."

"You sicken me, McIntyre," Margaret snarled. "You too Pierce!"

"What? I haven't even said anything, and your jumping down my throat," Hawkeye had his hands up in defense.

"Figures that she'd jump at both of us for it," Trapper snorted. "She's just like Frank in that department."

Before anything else could be said, Andrew decided to walk over and try to get them to settle down.

"Okay guys, come on, this is not the time to argue," Andrew informed them. "We're all plenty tired right now. But I suggest we pull together and keep going."

"Try telling that to those perverts," Frank marched over to argue with them. "They don't know the meaning of human decency."

"Yeah Andrew. Frank should know," Hawkeye said. "Frank goes to the shower every morning while indecent."

"You are a disgrace to the 4077th, let alone the U.S. Army," Frank scowled.

"Well you can't win them all," Trapper shrugged casually.

"Come on guys, this is ridiculous," Andrew complained. "We're all in this together."

"You know what's ridiculous? The fact that we had to work 18 hours in OR, with patients piling up in mounds every hour on the hour," Hawkeye issued. "Having you telling us to cut it out isn't exactly helping."

Andrew had a shocked look on his face as if he was offended by that. Luckily, Margaret took this as her cue to step in.

"Listen, Captain, you happen to be talking to my fiance," Margaret barked. "He's only trying to help us out. Not to mention he outranks you both."

"Ah, forgive me for being so blind," Hawkeye said sarcastically with that faux smile on his face. "Not to mention deaf over the fact that we can't say anything bad about Andrew when Hot Lips is in town."

"I say that the two of them should be shipped off on the next bus," Trapper was also being sarcastic. "Preferably one that doesn't land them in the middle of the war, like where we are right now."

Andrew was growing annoyed by this as he furrowed his eyebrows. Believe it or not, he hasn't been in the best mood either. He hardly got any sleep like everyone else, and trying to be the voice of reason here was taking its toll on him. His patience was wearing thin, and he was at his limit.

Keeping that scowl on his face, he stomped over to them. "Now you listen here, Pierce and McIntyre..."

"NOT YOU TOO MAJOR PETERSON!" Klinger howled angrily, getting his attention. "Now I have all three Majors stepping in the spot that I just mopped up! But I suppose it's three strikes and your out, right Major!?"

"Klinger, I'm sorry! I didn't mean it," Andrew defended.

"Yeah right. Nice try sir," Klinger scoffed. "Why don't we just invite every man in Korea to walk over this floor that I'm mopping? Then we'll see who should mop!"

"Klinger, you're being unreasonable," Andrew deadpanned, rolling his eyes. "It was a simple mistake. Everyone makes them."

"Oh sure. I'm not allowed to make mistakes, and yet you are," Klinger scowled.

"I didn't say that Klinger," Andrew pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Well, it sure sounded like it. You just have to crush the masterpiece that I've been mopping on," Klinger cried dramatically. "Some friend you are!"

Margaret stepped in and sided with Andrew as she stood next to him. "You listen to me Corporal, he's a Major and he outranks you. And unless you want to start eating that mop and cleaning latrines for the rest of this war, you better back off of my fiance."

"I got a better idea," Klinger took the mop and broke it in half with his knee. "Find someone else to mop! I quit!"

"Well, there's your draft-dodging pervert," Frank retorted. "Refuses to obey the commands of a superior officer. Just the same old stuff from living in this pigpen."

"Which pigpen Frank? Here or the Swamp," Hawkeye queried.

"Either way, it's all the same," Trapper retorted. "If you ask me, I say this whole camp is a pigpen."

"Oh why don't you two peddle your fish," Frank scoffed.

"Nah, we did that yesterday," Hawkeye dismissed nonchalantly.

"Just like we do everything you tell us to do," Trapper added.

"Well you two aren't helping either," Margaret spoke up, giving them a cross expression. "You two juvenile delinquents are causing a commotion amongst the rest of us."

"Oh, you should know," Hawkeye said snidely. "You happen to be Andrew's hussy of a lady."

"Now wait just a minute Pierce," Andrew growled, glaring at him. "Don't call Margaret a hussy! I don't want you calling her that! Or a bimbo!"

"Then what is she, Andrew? A man?" Trapper questioned.

"You know what I mean, McIntyre," Andrew was getting fed up. "But I want both of you to know that you're being obnoxious!"

"Is that what we are to you, Andrew?" Hawkeye asked.

"As of this moment, yes," yelled Andrew.

"Gentlemen, please," Father Mulcahy hollered from the sidelines. "We are all under a heavy amount of stress from all the 18 hours of casualties we've gotten, and thus we are all tired from it. But you should all keep it together and not argue like little children. We are in God's presence you know, and he would be very disappointed if we're all acting like total nincompoops."

That instantly got them to stop arguing as they took that in. It was then Andrew was the first to speak as he let out a sigh.

"Father Mulcahy is right guys," Andrew admitted. "Arguing like this isn't getting us anywhere. We're adults, so let's be sensible about this."

"Some of us more than others," Hawkeye said, looking at Frank for emphasis.

Frank was quick to take notice of that, as he was ready to lash out at him for it. "Listen here, Pierce!"

"Alright, that's enough," Margaret interrupted. "Andrew's right. We aren't getting anywhere with us bickering like this. So we might as well get back to work and get everything done. Then hopefully, our sour moods will improve when we finally take a break."

"I couldn't have said it better Margaret," Andrew flashed her a smile. "Thank you, my dear."

"Anytime, darling," she returned the smile.

No one else said a word as they all returned to their usual duties. In Klinger's case, he took the top half of the mop and used it to mop the floor while crouching on his knees. If he's lucky, someone might trip over him before stepping on the floor that he mopped up. But what they didn't know was that an important announcement was going to be made on the P.A. system. And it was sure to help out with lifting everyone's spirits...

---

IN COLONEL BLAKE'S OFFICE:

Meanwhile, we see Henry in his own office, looking through the filing cabinet in the corner to try to find the folders for the soldiers that came into the 4077 wounded. He was doing this since he figured that everyone in OR would be suffering from a minor case of the cranks, and they were likely bickering and arguing with one another. And he wanted no part of it either. The others could take care of that anyway.

He spent the next few minutes looking through each of the drawers. Eventually, he found the folders, and pulled them out, just as Radar was entering his office with some news for him. With his back turned towards the company clerk, Henry turned around just as he was to call out for him.

"Radar!" He hollered right as he looked directly towards him.

"I'm here sir," Radar said simply.

"Oh. Well, uh, very good," Henry cleared his throat as he gave him the folders. "Here you go Radar. These folders have the information of the soldiers that came in wounded."

"Right, sir," Radar took them. "Sir, also, I've got news to share with you."

"You do?" Henry raised an eyebrow. "We getting anymore casualties?"

"No sir. It's different. Something entirely different," Radar shook his head. "Good news."

"Well what is it Radar," Henry asked. "We could use some good news after the past 18 hours of surgery."

"Well, sir," Radar started. "It's about the requisition form you signed earlier?"

"Which requisition form?" Henry queried, crossing his arms. "I've signed at least 6 dozen of them within the past several hours."

"It's for the movie we requisitioned for," Radar reminded him. "You know? One that we sent for?"

"Oh..." Henry figured out what Radar was talking about. "That movie."

"Uh-huh sir," Radar nodded. "You think it's smart? Showing romantic drama movie? Of 1942?"

"Welp, it doesn't hurt to try it," Henry shrugged. "I mean, that ol' classic should be here by tonight. Correct?"

"Yes." Radar said.

"I don't mind telling you, but I think a romantic drama film is prezactly what the doctor ordered," Henry told him. "Wait till the others hear about this. They'll be giving a horse's patoot long enough to bring morale back up to where should be standing."

"I've heard that sir," Radar agreed with him.

"So anyhow, you think it's about time we make that announcement on the P.A. system?" Henry wondered.

"Only if you want it, Colonel," Radar insisted.

"Well, it can be a start to bring up everyone's spirits," Henry said. "So knock yourself out."

"Not literally sir," Radar nodded as he headed for the door.

"Yes. That's prezactly what I meant Radar," Henry hollered as Radar went back into his office to make that announcement.

Before he knew it, Radar turned on the P.A. system and started speaking into it.

"ATTENTION! ALL PERSONNEL! COLONEL BLAKE SIGNED ME TO MAKE AN ANNOUNCEMENT!" Radar started as we're focused in OR with everyone stopping what they were doing to listen. "DUE TO EVERYONE, BEING TIRED AND CRANKY, WE'VE PLANNED A SPECIAL TREAT FOR ALL O' YA!"

"My, this ought to be interesting," Hawkeye looked curious. "Maybe it'll be something good."

"I hope that it's not Halloween yet," Trapper said sarcastically. "I'm not ready for any tricks or treats."

"Shhh," Andrew hushed them as Radar continued his announcement.

"TREAT THAT'S BEEN PLANNED WILL BE ARRIVING, AT 1900 HOURS TONIGHT! IT'S A SPECIAL MOVIE THAT GOT SENT FOR 4077TH M*A*S*H!"

"A movie?" Margaret raised an eyebrow. "What kind of movie?"

"I dunno," Andrew looked confused. "Do you suppose it's something good?"

"Knowing the army, it's probably some boring film that we've seen before," Klinger said dully. "In that case, I already know how it's going to go."

"Do you mind? Some of us are listening to the announcements here," Frank scolded him.

"Frank should know. He's always wondering what the announcements are, to see if he got a recommendation for the purple heart," Hawkeye said teasingly.

"Pierce, cut it out," Frank warned him before listening to what Radar had to announce.

"FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO'RE WONDERING, FILM'S A CLASSIC OF SOME KIND," Radar then revealed to them. "THE FILM BEING PLAYED TONIGHT IS CASABLANCA!"

"What?" Andrew grew shocked at what he just heard as did everyone else. "Did he say Casablanca? As in, the film starring Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman?"

"IF YOU MUST KNOW, IT'S THE FILM STARRING ONE, UH...HUMPHREY BOGART AND ERR...ONE INGRID BERGMAN!"

Needless to say, the people in OR were excited to hear that as some hooting and hollering was heard throughout OR.

"PLEASE HOLD ALL 'PPLAUSES TILL AFTER ANNOUNCEMENTS ARE DONE!" Radar concluded the announcements. "THAT'LL BE ALL, SIRS! AND MA'AMS!"

With that, the announcements were finished and the P.A. system was turned off. This was pretty exciting news for them.

"I can't believe it," Andrew uttered as a smile crept onto his face. "We're gonna be watching Casablanca tonight at 1900 hours. I love that movie."

"It would seem that they're showing a decent movie for a change," Klinger smiled, dropping the mop onto the floor. "This would be the perfect opportunity to wear that outfit that I've been saving just for this occasion."

"Well, what do you know? We're watching a romantic drama classic tonight," Hawkeye mused. "Trap, do you know what this means?"

"We should each grab a nurse to join us for the movie tonight Hawk," Trapper took a wild guess.

"You know it," Hawkeye smirked. "And we can each act like Rick Blaine while our nurses act like Ilsa Lund."

"Not caring if our nurses already have a boyfriend or a husband back at home," Trapper grinned.

"That's how we like them," Hawkeye nodded.

Margaret was ignoring them as she was looking forward to seeing Casablanca again since this wasn't the first time she's seen it.

"Well, I for one am looking forward to watching it. I 'absolutely' love Casablanca," Margaret was gushing. "I haven't watched it in ages, so it'll be a treat to watch it again. And with my charming and handsome fiance to watch it with me."

"No doubt about that," Andrew chuckled as Margaret got up close to his face, rubbing her index finger across his chest. "I just hope you won't get fixated on Rick Blaine my dear, seeing how handsome he is, especially as a man."

"Oh come on darling," Margaret brushed off. "Sure Rick Blaine is a beast of a man, but you are something else. You are virile on top of being handsome. And besides, I think you would look marvelous if you were to dress up as Rick Blaine."

"Yup. Of course," Andrew gulped as his cheeks were light pink. "And you would you very beautiful dressed as Ilsa Lund. Not that I would go for the real thing, because I got you. And I love you with all my heart Margaret."

"Andrew, I love you with all my heart too," Margaret started flirting with him. "Just wait until we get to that plane scene. We can sit in the back row seats in the mess tent, and then," she leaned towards his ear and whispered. "We can be naughty together, under the chairs, baby."

"Oh...w-w-wow. Yes Margaret," Andrew was sweating while blushing profusely. "That would be hot..."

"Glad to hear that," she then kissed him on the cheek. "Because it'll be good practice for us."

"I agree," Andrew smiled. "We could get in plenty of practice together."

"Oh yes," Margaret whispered seductively.

And then there was Frank, who was pretty excited to watch a good movie after so much time has gone by.

"Well, hot-diggity-dog!" Frank yelled while slapping his knee and had that weasel-like grin on his face. "This is terrific! I haven't seen a good movie in ages!"

"Oh, Frank, don't be childish. It's only a movie," Hawkeye chastised him before excitedly saying to Trapper. "Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh boy! A movie! Hee hee hee!"

"I'm so excited, I could plot," Trapper said in the driest tone that he could muster up.

"Well gloriosky indeed," Father Mulcahy got his comment out. "I'm personally happy about this since the Lord has bestowed us with this gift of entertainment to help bring up everyone's spirits in this camp."

"I couldn't have said it any better Father," Hawkeye told him.

"Here here." Trapper agreed.

"Well guys, let's finish up, and then we can get ready for the movie tonight," Andrew instructed. "This is gonna be a wonderful experience for all of us."

"You said it," Margaret winked at him before they resumed working.

They didn't say anything else as their thoughts were plagued with how things are gonna turn out tonight with Casablanca being shown in the mess tent and that this could be the break that they've been longing for. But they would all have to wait for tonight. They could only hope that this would be worth the wait...

---

IN MARGARET'S TENT - 18:23

Several hours have passed since then. And all the work in OR had been completed by that point, so everyone was taking it easy for the moment. In Margaret's tent, in particular, we see Margaret and Andrew in there, getting themselves ready for the movie tonight in the mess tent. While Andrew was wearing his usual uniform, Margaret was wearing that fluffy white turtleneck long sleeve shirt she wore on a couple of occasions, to go with her green pants. They were looking forward to it, and they hoped that it could be a night that they could remember, which was likely.

Currently, Andrew was looking into the mirror that was in her dresser while Margaret was sitting at her desk, brushing her hair to make sure it was neat. She was also doing it in a slightly amorous manner.

"You know something Margaret," Andrew commented, looking at his reflection. "I'm looking forward to seeing Casablanca tonight with you."

"Really?" Margaret asked as she kept brushing away.

"Sure. Why not? It'll be a romantic drama that'll set the mood for both of us. We could use something like that after dealing with this war. And besides," Andrew explained before grinning at her. "We are engaged. Of course, I will do it if you are okay with it."

"I'm okay with it Andrew. Honest," she told him as she put the brush down, put a hair clip on the right side of her hair, stood up, and turned around to face him.

"Okay. Then it's settled," he dusted his hands off. "We'll have a lot of fun tonight, my dear."

"I'll make sure of it, darling," Margaret said teasingly. "Andrew, there's something that I need to show you."

"Why sure," this got Andrew a little curious. "What is it that you want to show me?"

"Come over here," instructed Margaret. "I'll show you."

She then motioned him over to her desk where a rectangular box was. Grabbing the box, she opened it and took out what appeared to be a riding crop. Andrew observed it for a second or so before he remembered seeing it from somewhere.

"Hey, wait a minute," he spoke up. "Isn't that the same riding crop that you had when you were giving that one childbirth lesson?"

"The one that I hit Pierce and McIntyre with?" Margaret gave him a smirk. "Yes. That's the same one."

"Ah, I see," Andrew then had another question pop up in his mind. "Where did you get it from anyway?"

"I'll tell you," Margaret got to the point. "This was my father's. It was his during his cavalry days."

"Wow," Andrew uttered. "That's interesting."

"Uh-huh. My mom gave it to him on their wedding night," she revealed to him.

"That's amazing Margaret," he mused. "Although to be honest, I'm not surprised, considering how you also have a flask bottle and a tiny pistol in his remembrance."

"You got me there," Margaret laughed. "That goes to show how fond I am of my dad."

"In any case, that must've been some special gift," Andrew remarked.

"You know it," Margaret then felt like bringing up something else. "Andrew? Do you remember when I wanted you to try horseback riding at least once?"

"It was when Colonel Potter came to the 4077th to see Colonel Blake and the rest of us," Andrew remembered.

"Yes," Margaret had a sudden seductive tone in her voice. "Do you remember what I said to you in your tent the night Radar brought that horse to the camp?"

"Uhhhhh..." Andrew was unable to say it since he was blushing and sweating profusely.

"I said 'Ride me, Andrew. Ride me.' Don't you remember?" Margaret gave him that flirtatious look.

"Yup," Andrew said quickly while gulping. "Yes, you did."

"Oh Andrew," Margaret cooed. "I love you."

"I love you too, Margaret," Andrew smiled sheepishly.

"Ooh, ride me again," Margaret moaned in pleasure as she brought him to her cot. "Please ride me, darling. Ride me."

"Yes dear," Andrew grinned as they embraced. "Ooh, Margaret."

"Ooh Andrew," Margaret said as they collapsed on her cot.

Then all of a sudden, the two of them engaged in a kissing fest while on Margaret's cot. They were rolling on top of each other, almost as if they were making out with each other.

They ended up pausing for a moment when Margaret heard a thumping sound in her chest, which got her curious.

"Was that cannon fire, or is it my heart pounding?" Margaret asked teasingly.

"Your heart, definitely," Andrew answered with that flirty smirk. "My heart is doing the same thing."

"Ah, Andrew, shall we continue kissing?" Margaret asked in a pleasurable moan.

"Yes we should," Andrew purred before their lips met again.

Being their usual kissing fests, this was going to go on for a while. Of course, they would be done before it comes time to report to the mess tent at 1900 hours for that special movie. They could only wait...

---

While that was going on, outside in the compound, we see Klinger leaving his tent, wearing his best Ingrid Bergman outfit that she wore in Casablanca. And underneath that, Klinger was wearing another dress that he picked out himself. He too was preparing for that movie in the mess tent shortly. For the moment, he decided to take a stroll through the compound, since it seemed pretty nice out, even though the sun was starting to set over the horizon.

His walk took place for a couple of minutes before he was stopped in his tracks by a voice that called out for him.

"CORPORAL!" That belonged to Frank Burns, who saw Klinger walking in his outfit, as he marched right over to him, getting Klinger to stop.

"Can I help you, Major?" Klinger asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes. Why are you in that costume and not in uniform soldier," Frank barked, getting straight to the point.

"Well sir, I'll have you know that this is my best Ingrid Bergman outfit. I was saving it for this occasion," Klinger told him matter-of-factly. "I'm gonna wear it tonight when we're all watching Casablanca."

"Not on my account Klinger," Frank argued. "You are not entering the mess tent dressed like that. I won't allow it!"

"Well sir, don't knock it till you try it," Klinger shrugged casually, not at all intimidated by Frank. "In any case, I suggest you try dressing up like this for a change."

This didn't sit well with Frank, who only scowled. "You know something Corporal? You are nothing but a big disgrace to this U.S. Military soil, let alone the U.S. Army."

"That's what I've been trying to tell the general," Klinger exclaimed. "It's my ticket home and to get myself a Section 8 Discharge. I'm hoping to get my point across soon."

"Well tough toenails Klinger," Frank quarreled. "You aren't getting out of here with a Section 8, no matter how many dresses you wear. Scarlette O'Hara, Shirley Temple, Ingrid Bergman, you name it. You aren't getting out of being a member of the U.S. Army!"

"That's what you think Major," Klinger said. "Someday, I'll get out of this man's army, one way or another! You'll see!"

"I don't have time to argue with a degenerate pervert like you. I've got things to take care of," Frank scoffed, getting ready to walk off.

"Just think Major, this happens to be my chance to dress up like this! It's like I'm going on my first date!" Klinger hollered.

"Corporal," Frank stopped for a second to holler at him again. "I better see you out of that outfit by 1900 hours when we go to the mess tent!"

"Never on a first date sir," Klinger countered before turning around and walking off.

Frank decided to ignore him as he went back to the Swamp to get ready for tonight. But what he and the others didn't know was that some mistake was made by the army and that the 4077 would have to find its means of entertainment instead. They would have to find out for themselves...

---

IN THE MESS TENT - 19:00

It was at this point where everyone was gathering into the mess tent, with the chairs lined up as they would be in a movie theater. They were looking forward to tonight, some more than others, and the main crew had already found their spots in the mess tent. Needless to say, they were expecting this to be a rather interesting night.

"Ah, isn't it a wonderful night to be watching a movie Trap?" Hawkeye queried.

"You tell me, Hawk," Trapper said. "You were the one who got us prepped up for tonight."

"That's true," Hawkeye wrapped his left arm around Nurse Able's shoulder. "And I got my nurse here to prove it."

"So do I," Trapper casually brought his right arm around Nurse Baker's shoulder. "And I made sure my nurse was in mint condition before heading out to the movie theaters."

"Now you know what I did," Hawkeye grinned.

"It was a real good idea of you doctors to bring us here tonight so we could watch the movie together," Nurse Able admitted.

"And it's Casablanca too. What more could we ask for?" Nurse Baker wondered.

"Well, now that you mention it, there is one favor we'd like to ask of you," Hawkeye brought up. "We can meet behind the supply tent tonight after the movie is over."

"You go behind the supply tent Hawkeye. Baker and I will go behind the motor pool," Trapper remarked.

"That sounds good enough for me," Able smiled warmly.

"Me too," Baker agreed with a smile.

"Would you look at that? We got our nurses in the palm of our hands," Hawkeye commented as Trapper nodded in agreement.

"Speaking of which, how's about you two shut your yaps," Frank scolded from the seat behind them.

"You shut your yap first," Hawkeye insisted. "Or should we lock it up and toss the key away?"

"Preferably where it couldn't be found," Trapper added dryly.

"We're going to be showing a movie shortly, and I would appreciate it if you two delinquents bite your tongues for the duration of it," Frank warned them.

"Trap, I think we'll have to reserve another seat for us and our nurses," Hawkeye told him. "The neighbor behind us is impossible."

"Maybe the dog will bite his tongue for us." Trapper said.

"Now come on you guys, this is supposed to be a fun evening," Andrew spoke up as he and Margaret were sitting together near the front row. "That means bickering is not recommended."

"What isn't recommended is for us to have a ranking officer bother us while we're fraternizing with our nurses," Hawkeye deadpanned.

"You've forgotten the fact that those are my nurses that you're with," Margaret hollered. "And they are part of my nursing staff."

"So it seems Margaret is the proud owner of a nursing staff now," Hawkeye retorted. "Wonder what contract she had them sign for that?"

"I would like to give her $500 for some of them," Trapper snorted.

"My nurses are not for sale," Margaret denied.

"What if I gave you a swift kiss to the mouth," Hawkeye teased.

"Save some of her greasy-looking hot lips for me," Trapper joined in.

"Knock it off you two," Andrew sneered. "They aren't for sale, so just accept that."

"Right after Margaret gives us an acceptance form to accept that," Hawkeye countered.

"What?" Margaret growled.

"People, please! We're supposed to be having fun," Father Mulcahy spoke up as he was sitting next to Henry. "The Lord has bestowed this great gift upon. We don't need to anger him into taking it away from us!"

"Try telling that to Captains Pierce and McIntyre," Frank told him. "They're the biggest degenerates to have hit this war."

"Once a degenerate always a degenerate," Hawkeye said with that smirk.

"Here here," Trapper said casually.

"Hey, when's the movie coming," Klinger hollered from the back, sitting in a stool chair with the film projector. "I got all dressed up for this occasion!"

"Take it easy Klinger, there's no need to get to a full boil," Henry told him. "It'll get here when it gets here. So until then, let's remain steady and not get ants in our pants."

"We already got ants in Frank's pants, right Frank?" Hawkeye teased as he looked at Frank.

"You better watch that mouth, bub," Frank grumbled. "I'd button it if I were you, Pierce."

"I'd button it if I were you too, Frank," Trapper got in a comment.

"You too McIntyre," Frank scoffed.

"Guys, come on," Andrew said while shaking his head. "Don't forget about why we're here."

"Oh just forget them, Andrew. They aren't going to listen to us," Margaret retorted. "They never listen to me or Frank as it is. Let's make the most of our night."

"Yeah, your right Margaret," Andrew sighed. "I just can't wait for the movie to be shown, dear."

"Me either darling," Margaret smiled.

Aside from the group chatter, nothing else was said as they were wondering what was keeping the movie and if it was going to show up. Fortunately, the answer was solved when Radar came into the mess tent. But judging by the frown on his face, it would appear that he had bad news for the camp, and he had to tell it to Henry first. Seeing Henry sitting in the front row seat, Radar walked over to him, still bearing that frown.

---

Henry was just minding his own business when Radar tapped him on the shoulder to get his attention.

"Cuse me, sir?" Radar uttered.

"What is it Radar," Henry wondered. "Did the movie come?"

"Uhhhh...'bout that sir," Radar moaned. "'Fraid your not gonna like this."

"Well just tell me about it and we can work something out," Henry suggested.

"Right sir. You see..." Radar leaned over into his ear and whispered the bad news into the Colonel's ear.

Of course, Henry did not like what he heard as a shocked expression was shown on his face, unable to believe what he heard.

"What do you mean the movie ain't coming after all?!" Henry queried loudly, getting everyone to gasp in shock. "Oh Radar. Just tell 'em-"

"What gone wrong. Got it, sir," Radar finished for him as he revealed to everyone. "Seems HQ made a big mistake on sending movie. They sent it to the wrong unit of M*A*S*H. 8063rd has it, and they got it 'stead o' us."

"Welp, I guess that leaves us short a movie," Henry groaned. "So much for watching a picture in the mess tent."

Naturally, the crowd broke out into a state of uproar at what happened and that they weren't gonna be watching Casablanca.

"Well Trap, it just goes to show you, sometimes you can't get 'em all," Hawkeye said in annoyance.

"What about you? You were the one who got the nurses all freshened up for the occasion," Trapper fired back. "Now we're not gonna be watching that movie, and all of our plans are ruined."

"Don't remind me," Hawkeye groaned. "A nice and beautiful night has gone to waste."

"How do you think I feel," Klinger cried. "I got dressed up in my best Ingrid Bergman for nothing! What am I gonna do about that?!"

"Corporal? Didn't I tell you to get out of that getup before getting in here," Frank sneered.

"How do you expect me to get out of the army while wearing my fatigues," Klinger countered. "People will think that I love it here, which I don't!"

"Welcome to the club Klinger," Trapper retorted.

"Sorry Klinger, but Frank is just going by his dress code," Hawkeye snorted. "Which happens to be called 'Frank Marion 'Ferret Face' Burns Dress Code and No Section 8 Discharge'. You'll find it in Frank's bible."

"You better stuff it, Pierce," Frank sneered.

"He could've fooled me," Trapper gave him that face.

"Frankly, I think you guys are being impossible," Margaret retorted. "Since we're not gonna be watching that movie."

"Says more about you than us," Hawkeye huffed.

"Speak for yourself," Trapper snorted.

"People, let's just try to remain calm and remember why we're here," Father Mulcahy tried to get them to stop.

"Forget it, Father, they aren't gonna listen," Henry groaned. "There's no use trying to stop it when they're acting like a pack of animals."

"Colonel, I insist that you do something about this," Margaret huffed. "Oh wait, that's right! Our C.O is a spineless, mealymouthed, fly-fishing, inept impostor!"

"Now that's 'really' hitting below the belt Major," Henry fired back. "Just because I'm not the best with running this man's army doesn't mean you can insult the way I run things. And the way I run things is to allow you guys to settle your 'own' arguments."

"Hmph. No surprises there," Frank huffed. "All the more reason as to why I should be commanding this outfit, so these fiascos can be avoided."

"You heard him, Henry," Hawkeye joked snidely. "I'll get the chains."

"And I'll get the handcuffs," Trapper joined in. "As of this moment, we're all prisoners of war."

"You two are making a mockery out of this," Frank barked.

"What do you say we take out the inside of a mockery," Hawkeye suggested. "Do you know what one looks like Trapper?"

"I thought you knew Hawkeye," Trapper retorted. "We saw one together."

"Oh go stuff your face," Frank bellowed.

It was clear that the bickering and arguing weren't going to stop anytime soon, and Andrew felt the need to intervene and do something. Seeing that the movie isn't going to be shown, they would have to do with a backup plan for entertainment. And from doing some thinking, Andrew came up with a splendid idea.

"Hey Margaret, I'll be back in a moment," Andrew said. "I got an idea on how to put an end to this bickering."

"Alright Andrew," Margaret nodded in understanding as Andrew stood up.

From there, Andrew walked over to Father Mulcahy and got his attention.

"Hey Father," he uttered. "I'd like you to go to the Officer's Club and..."

He then whispered the rest of it in his ear. By the time he was done, the Father was pretty impressed by it.

"My, that sounds like a terrific idea Major," Mulcahy commented. "I'll be right back."

"Alright, and get some help from the enlisted men," Andrew suggested before approaching Radar. "And Radar? I would like it if you could..."

Andrew whispered the rest of it into Radar's ear, who looked shocked by what he told him once he was done.

"Wow. Ya, sure I should do that sir," Radar wondered.

"Well, unless you want this arguing to continue, I think you should," Andrew remarked.

"Got it, sir," Radar nodded as he stood up. "Should I get help?"

"Yes. Get some enlisted men to get it in here," Andrew told him. "And hurry it up. I don't think I can keep a lid on the bickering for long."

"Right sir. I'll be back quickly," Radar then headed for the door with Father Mulcahy after they got a couple of enlisted men to help them out.

Once they were gone, Andrew decided to get the crowd under control by letting out a loud whistle with his fingers.

"Alright people! Alright! That's enough!" Andrew yelled, getting their attention. "Now I know you're all upset that we aren't going to be seeing Casablanca tonight."

"Don't I know it," Klinger gripped as several other people agreed with complaints.

"But that doesn't mean we still can't have fun in the mess tent! It just so happens that I have a plan to keep us entertained without a movie," Andrew declared. "Father Mulcahy and Radar are getting some special things to the mess tent, and they'll be back shortly."

"So what are we to do in the meantime," Hawkeye wondered. "We can't just sit here while sitting on our brasses."

"Plenty of us know the feeling," Trapper retorted.

"Well, until they get back, why don't we pass the time by singing a song," Andrew suggested. "Now I know this good one that we could all sing along to."

"And what song would that be?" Margaret queried.

"Well now that you asked, I was thinking we could sing Auld Lang Syne," Andrew said. "You all know that song, so I insist that we should sing it together."

"Colonel? Is the Major giving us a direct order to sing together?" Frank wondered with slight agitation.

"Sure seems like it to me," Henry shrugged nonchalantly, not caring one bit. "I guess we don't have a choice."

"Alright, now I'd like for all of us to sing together," Andrew walked back over to Margaret. "Ready everyone?"

Everyone nodded as Andrew sat back down and started them off. "Should auld acquaintance be 'forgot'..."

"And never brought to mind?" It wasn't long before everyone joined in with the singing, with Margaret singing the loudest, giving Andrew a flirtatious look with her eyes every so often.

"Should auld acquaintance be 'forgot', and days of auld lang syne."

They continued singing that song for several more minutes or so.

---

Meanwhile, Father Mulcahy came out of the Officer's Club with a couple of enlisted men, dragging out the piano that he was planning to play in the mess tent. Even though they couldn't watch a movie, it didn't mean that they couldn't have some fun to make up for that.

In a building nearby, we see Radar walking out with two enlisted men, carrying a drum set that Radar has used on a couple of occasions. In his back pocket, Radar had his bugle stuffed in there in case he needed to play it to get the quarreling to stop.

At one moment, Father Mulcahy and Radar encountered each other as they were heading back to the mess tent.

"Why Radar, that's a marvelous drumset," Father Mulcahy complimented. "Are you bringing that to the mess tent?"

"Yes, Father. Major Peterson wants it for entertaining porpoises," Radar said.

"I think you mean purposes Radar," Father Mulcahy corrected him. "And that's what the piano is for. Andrew wants me to play it to ease the tension in the mess tent."

"Goes to show our similar 'ssignments." Radar admitted.

"Yeah," the Father nodded before hearing the singing in the mess tent. "Seems to me the Major is already keeping them occupied with a song."

"Wow. They sure are," Radar uttered. "Let's get back to mess tent."

"After you Radar," Father Mulcahy insisted.

Radar gave him a slight thank you as they headed back to the mess tent, with Radar going in first with Father Mulcahy going in afterwards.

---

By then, the crew was near the end of the song, as they wrapped it up.

"For auld lang syne, my dear! For auld lang syne! We'll take a cup 'o' kindness yet, 'for' auld lang syne!" They finished just as Radar and Mulcahy came back in.

"We have returned Major with the necessities you've wanted," Father Mulcahy got his attention.

"Oh," Andrew saw Father Mulcahy place the piano to the side next to the door, while Radar put his drum set in front of the film picture screen. "Good work there Father. And you too Radar."

"It was an honor to do this blessing in disguise, fine son," Mulcahy admitted.

"Me too sir," Radar added. "Doing as you ordered."

"I know," Andrew nodded. "And that's what we need."

"Well, what do you know?" Hawkeye quirked. "Looks like Andrew has a musical planned for us."

"This ought to be a dinner and a show," Trapper deadpanned. "Preferably without the dreck in the mess tent."

"Alright people, here's how tonight is going to go," Andrew got their attention. "We're gonna have some fun to make up for not having a movie, which is why I had the Father and Radar bring in the piano and drumset respectively."

"So what song are we gonna sing next sir," Klinger wondered.

"Well since we just sang a song, I was thinking we'd do something else to get warmed up first," Andrew told him. "Got any suggestions?"

"If I may make one Andrew, I know someone among us who could do perfect imitations," Hawkeye suggested. "Specifically imitations of Hollywood stars."

"Imitations of Hollywood stars? Ha! The gall," Frank snorted.

"I thought you were gonna suggest one of us to do bird imitations," Andrew deadpanned.

"We can save that for Wednesday night," Trapper told him. "In the meantime, we can do Hollywood star imitations. And who better to do that than our company clerk?"

"Radar," Andrew was rather surprised by this. "You can do imitations of Hollywood actors?"

"Yes sir. Well, sorta sir. In my spare time," Radar admitted bashfully. "I can do a few. So to speak. Sir."

"Well, alright then," Andrew decided to go with it. "Here to do Hollywood impersonations as a warm-up for tonights' entertainment is one Corporal Radar O'Reilly. Come on up Radar and stand right in front of the film screen."

"Just don't trip over your drumset," Hawkeye warned him as Radar walked over.

"He shouldn't be able to trip over it, seeing how short he is," Trapper retorted.

"Ah, guys, cut it out," Radar grumbled as he stood right in front of his drumset.

"Anyway, we can begin right about now," Andrew turned to face Radar. "Uh, Radar? You may begin when ready."

"Yes, sir," Radar cleared his throat and turned to face the crowd. "Shall I start Major?"

"Yes. Go on ahead," Andrew nodded, as Radar got started with his impersonations.

Clearing his throat, he did his first one. "You better believe it, mister, or you're dead where you stand."

"Who's that supposed to be?" Frank was the one who asked that.

"John Wayne." Radar answered with a sheepish smile.

"John Wayne?" Frank snorted. "He doesn't sound anything like you."

"Could've fooled me," Hawkeye gave him that look. "He's done it several times before."

"I thought he was doing the Ritz Brothers," Trapper retorted.

"Now guys, I think it was a decent John Wayne," Andrew complimented. "Alright Radar, try another one."

"Right. Here's 'nother one," Radar then did another one. "I don't believe in laying in a supply of anything."

"Now that's the Ritz Brother," Hawkeye pointed enthusiastically.

"My money's laid on them too," Trapper commented.

"No," Radar shook his head.

"It's not John Wayne again, is it," Frank wondered.

"It's different sir," Radar told him.

"Welp," Henry did some thinking. "Is it James Stewart?"

"Wrong sir," Radar told him.

"Oh come on guys," Andrew said. "Don't you know that it's Cary Grant when you hear him?"

"That's Cary Grant," Klinger was puzzled. "I never would've guessed that."

"Oh Klinger, I don't think that's important," Andrew then face Radar. "It is Cary Grant, isn't it?"

"Yes," Radar confirmed. "Wanna have me do 'nother?"

"Sure Radar," Andrew smiled as the others encouraged him.

"Here's one other," Radar took a deep breath before reciting. "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn."

"I know who that one is," Margaret spoke up excitedly. "That's Clark Gable!"

"How do you know it's Clark Gable, Margaret," Hawkeye asked.

"For all we know, it could be someone else," Trapper added.

"Well, I happen to admire Clark Gable. He is quite a charming and handsome man," Margaret admitted before seeing the slightly hurt look on Andrew's face. "Of course, he's nothing compared to my fiancee Andrew."

"Uh, I appreciate that," Andrew said bashfully, thankful that she didn't forget about him.

"How do we know it's Clark Gable anyway?" Klinger queried.

"Cause that line was used in Gone With the Wind," Henry spoke up. "The same one that stars Vivien Leigh as Scarlett O'Hara. You have her dress and get up."

"I haven't forgotten sir," Klinger muttered.

"Yes it's Clark Gable," Radar told them. "Lemme do 'nother one."

"Just as long as I can get it right this time," Trapper retorted.

"Kay. Here goes," Radar then started before having trouble. "Uhh...You can't leave in a taxi. If you can get a taxi, you leave in a huff. But if that's soon, you leave in seconds and..."

"Alright hold on Radar," Hawkeye stood up and got him to stop. "Before you trip over your tongue, let me take over."

Radar didn't say anything as Hawkeye decided to recite it.

"Here's how it goes," Hawkeye cleared his throat. "You can leave in a taxi. If you can't get a taxi, you can leave in a huff. If that"s too soon, you can leave in a minute and a huff. You know, you haven't stopped talking since I came here? You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle."

"How'd you know sir," Radar asked.

"It's a line from Groucho Marx," Hawkeye deadpanned. "And it's from Duck Soap."

"There you have it, folks. Pierce just told us what Radar was trying to impersonate," Andrew proclaimed.

"Why not try someone more profound Corporal," Frank grunted.

"Yeah Radar," Hawkeye went back to his seat. "Try doing James Cagney."

"I think Radar should do Carmen Miranda," Trapper suggested.

"Let's save that for Klinger," Hawkeye told him. "He has the dress for it."

"I'll have you know that my best Carmen Miranda is kept neatly amongst my Klinger Collection," Klinger declared. "And I'm not gonna be wearing it anytime soon."

"Uh, if I may make a suggestion," Father Mulcahy spoke up. "How about doing Gary Cooper?"

"That's what we need, someone to do something from Sergeant York," Frank said in a gloating manner. "This is a military base, and it calls for military courtesy."

"Oh sure Frank," Hawkeye retorted sarcastically. "Because we're all crazy about war comedies like you are."

"Preferably with no bullets in their firearms," Trapper said dryly. "And all artilleries and howitzers with no ammunition."

"Guys? Wanna see me do Humphrey Bogart?" Radar asked. "I can do lines from the movie Casablanca."

"If we wanted that, we could watch the real thing," a sergeant in the audience hollered out.

"Or maybe we could have Klinger do it for us," Sgt Zale said smugly before looking at the Corporal. "After all, he's got the dress to match."

"How would you like to say that to my face Zale," Klinger warned with a growl. "Better yet, you try dressing up like her."

"I'd love to," Zale was being sarcastic. "But it just so happens that they don't have it in my size."

"You take that back or else," Klinger yelled.

"Or else what?" Zale dared him to get physical.

"That's enough! No need to be acting like animals," Margaret got them to stop.

"Says you," Trapper decided to tease her. "You can be an animal with me anytime, Hot Lips."

"You...How dare you?" Margaret sneered.

"Oh, oh, Trap," Hawkeye said in fake excitement. "You got Hurricane Houlihan going."

"'Personally', I don't think either of you is holding a good example," Frank snorted.

"How'd you like for us to stuff oatmeal in your slippers," Trapper threatened.

"Not to mention potato salad and succotash in your bathrobe," Hawkeye added.

"COLONEL!? THEY'RE THREATENING ME AGAIN!" Frank tattled on them.

"Simmer down Frank. They aren't causing a ruckus," Henry said indifferently. "In any case, I'm not taking part in it..."

"Gentlemen, I think we're becoming selfish with suggestions for Radar to do," Father Mulcahy commented.

They didn't hear him, as from there, everyone was getting at each other's throats again with bickering. Andrew had to do something fast, and he knew exactly what they should do.

---

Approaching the Father, he then spoke to him.

"Father, they aren't gonna stop. But I have an idea," Andrew told him. "I'd like you to use that piano. And when I give the signal, I want you to play..."

He then whispered the song into Father Mulcahy's ear, which seemed to fascinate the priest.

"Wow Major. That sounds remarkable," the Father admitted. "I'll be sure to play it."

"Good," Andrew smiled as the Father went over and sat right in front of the piano. "ALRIGHT PEOPLE! ENOUGH WITH THE BICKERING!"

As the bickering slowly came to a stop, Andrew made an announcement. "Seeing that we're getting excited again, let's sing another song. Hit it, Father."

Andrew gave him the signal, resulting in Mulcahy to start playing the piano, as he was playing Gee, Mom, I Want to Go Home. Father Mulcahy decided to start them off.

"A chaplain in the army has a collar on his neck," the Father sang, and everyone recognized the song on the spot. "If you don't listen to him you'll all wind up in heck."

"Oh I don't want no more of army life," everyone sang together. "Gee, Mom, I wanna go home."

"Alright Father, now we're getting somewhere," Andrew declared as Radar sat down next to Henry. "Okay. Pierce and McIntyre, how about you two go next?"

"Would you like to start us off Hawk?" Trapper suggested.

"I will if you will, Trap," Hawkeye obliged.

Nonetheless, the two of them did their line in unison. "Oh the surgeons in the army, they say we're mighty bright. We work on soldiers through the day and nurses through the night."

"I don't want no more of army life," everyone else sang as some of them cheered for their line. "Gee, Mom, I wanna go home."

"That pretty much sums you two up perfectly," Andrew said with mock amusement. "Okay. Who wants to go next?"

"How about you Henry? Why don't you go next?" Hawkeye encouraged.

"Yeah Henry," Trapper joined. "Surely we'd love to hear from our favorite commanding officer."

"Well..." Henry seemed hesitant at first.

"I don't see why not," Andrew shrugged. "Alright Colonel, you can go next."

"Alrighty...here we go," Henry obliged as he cleared his throat for his part. "A colonel in the army, I run a hospital. I enjoy golf and fishing, and drinking alcohol."

"I don't want no more of army life," some of them were heard laughing at what Henry sang. "Gee, Mom, I wanna go home."

"Not bad Colonel. That was pretty good," Andrew complimented. "Alright, who's next?"

"Hey, maybe you should go next, Andrew," Hawkeye said.

"Me? I should go next?" Andrew seemed a little bashful.

"Why not? Everyone else is singing, so you might as well join in," Trapper shrugged.

"Yeah, sir. It'll be fun," Klinger hollered.

"Well..." Andrew was uncertain about this.

"Oh come on Andrew," Margaret said in an encouraging voice. "I'd love to hear your line. Please?"

"Might as well Major," Henry shrugged. "No use missing out on all the fun."

"Well, okay," Andrew sighed. "Just know that my line won't be as great as the rest of you."

"We'll see about that," Hawkeye told him. "Go on ahead Andrew."

"Right," Andrew took a deep breath and sang his line in the most modest tone he could muster up. "A major in the army, I do not think I'm smart. While I'm the one who's sane here, the head nurse caught my heart."

"Oh I don't want no more of army life," everyone sang as some of them were awing at how modest he was while Margaret had a slight blush on her face, planning on returning the favor with her line later. "Gee, Mom, I wanna go home."

"Great job Andrew," Trapper commented. "You sure knocked us dead out here."

"Not literally of course," Hawkeye added.

"I guess I did," Andrew said calmly. "Okay. I think Radar should go next."

"Yeah Radar," Hawkeye teased him. "You can sing to us about your height and how short you are."

"Cut it out," Radar grumbled.

"Alright Radar, it's your turn," Andrew motioned to him. "Go ahead."

"Okay," Radar sighed before singing his line. "The corporals in the army, you say we're 'really' green. But if it weren't for us guys, you'd be in the latrine."

"I don't want no more of army life. Gee, Mom, I wanna go home."

"Nice one Radar," Andrew praised. "Who wants to go next?"

"I say it's Klinger," Hawkeye spoke up. "Klinger should go next."

"I'd love to hear what Klinger needs to sing for his line," said Trapper.

"If I may add, Klinger's part would be pretty interesting," Father Mulcahy commented.

"Well Klinger, there's the answer," Andrew faced him. "It's your turn."

"Oh, alright. Here's my line," Klinger started to sing. "Oh some guys like the army, I think that it's a mess. If it's so damn terrific how come I wear a dress?"

"I don't want no more of army life," they sang together as some of them criticized Klinger's line. "Gee, Mom, I wanna go home."

"Oh come on Klinger, just admitted," Hawkeye told him. "You look good in a dress."

"With bloomers to match," Trapper added.

"Well, regardless, I think it was decent," Andrew commented. "Not to mention nifty."

"Alrighty. Does anyone else want to volunteer?" Henry wondered.

"Colonel, I'd like to sing next," Margaret said. "I have the perfect line for my part."

"Well alright Margaret, go on ahead," Andrew smiled. "I'd love to hear what your part is."

"Trust me, darling. You'll be flattered," Margaret smirked. "Can I sing it?"

"Yes. Let's hear it, my dear," Andrew encouraged.

"Good," Margaret cleared her throat before singing her part. "While a head nurse in the army, I found the man I love. I am all set to marry, my darling Peterson."

"I don't want no more of army life," they decided to wrap up the song as Andrew was blushing profusely at the look Margaret gave him after her line. "Gee, Mom, I wanna go, but they won't let me go, gee, Mom, I wanna go home!"

It was then the song was over as Father Mulcahy stopped playing the piano while everyone was shown applauding for the song, except for Frank, who remained silent and kept his arms crossed.

"Alright, that was very good," Andrew told them. "And you did a wonderful job too Margaret."

"I sure hope so," Margaret gave him a playful smirk. "It was specifically for you darling."

"I've...I've noticed dear," Andrew gulped as he sounded flattered. "And I loved it."

"Good," Margaret kissed Andrew on the cheek. "Cause I loved your line too."

"Uhhhh...t-t-thanks," Andrew's cheeks were bright red.

"Alright Andrew, we've done some singing," Hawkeye got his attention. "Now what?"

"Oh," Andrew focused as that blush faded. "Well, how about more impersonations?"

"Oh no...No more Hollywood imitations," Trapper groaned.

"No," Andrew denied. "I was talking about us imitating each other."

"Ah, well that's different," Hawkeye admitted. "I've always wanted to imitate someone else."

"You and me both," Trapper snorted.

"Alright! Then that's what we'll do," Andrew proclaimed excitedly. "Who would like to go first?"

The group tried to think as to who should go first. It was pretty tough to figure out who should do the first impersonation. Sadly, no one wanted to step up voluntarily. Andrew found this to be quite jarring.

---

Fortunately, the silence was brought to a complete stop when someone decided to speak up.

"I'll go first," this came from Frank; the last person any of them expected to step up. Andrew was pretty shocked by this, as he didn't expect Frank to want to take part in this.

"Why Frank, you want to take part in this tomfoolery," Hawkeye teased. "You devil you."

"Oh shut your face Pierce," Frank snapped at him. "I'm only stepping up before none of you wants to."

"That works for me," Andrew didn't argue with that. "Okay Frank, you can start whenever you're ready."

"Right," Frank nodded, noticing everyone was looking at him. Figuring out who to imitate, he cleared his throat and started to speak.

"Hey, Trap? I've rounded up a couple of nurses to meet us at the motor pool tonight," Frank imitated Hawkeye. "Now what do you say we stuff some oatmeal in Frank's slippers? Hahaha haha!"

"Wow Frank," Andrew blinked. "Does Pierce sound like that?"

"I don't think so," Hawkeye remarked. "You wouldn't catch me dead trying to laugh like that."

"Especially with that Ferret Face of his," Trapper gave a snide remark. "Not to mention Frank wouldn't try going out with one of the nurses."

"Oh, nerts to you," Frank scoffed. "You are both just jealous."

"I wouldn't be jealous of someone who does a poor job at imitating a chief surgeon who knows how to perform a chest operation," Hawkeye deadpanned. "Not to mention where the arteries are located."

"I'll buy that," Trapper agreed.

"Hmph! Some fun you two are," Frank huffed. "You two take a lot of the fun out of this war."

"Uh, pardon me for intervening like this," Father Mulcahy spoke up before any conflicts could occur. "I wish to volunteer next Major Peterson."

"Why sure Father," Andrew smiled. "Go on ahead."

"I hope thy Lord doesn't forsake me for this," the Father prayed while looking up before starting his impersonation. "The war stinks. This place is a dump and seeing all those children left without any homes or parents makes it more of a hell hole. Now uh, if one may excuse me, I should help Hawkeye with tying Frank to his cot."

It was then several people were shocked at the Father's poor imitation of Trapper. Some were pretty amused by this. And then there was Trapper himself, who decided to get his comment out.

"Uh, no offense intended Father, but that was a terrible impersonation of me," Trapper told him honestly. "I sound nothing like that. I'm not Catholic."

"Forgive me for that, my fine son," Mulcahy exclaimed. "But I prefer to look on the brighter side of things. I prefer it if I didn't think cynically."

"We know that Father," Hawkeye told him. "And that's why you're the Chaplin of this cesspool."

"It brings me comfort to know about that, Hawkeye," Father Mulcahy said sheepishly.

"In any case, I guess that wasn't too bad Father," Andrew admitted shyly.

"I appreciate that Major," said the Chaplin.

"Major Peterson," Klinger announced loudly. "I wish to volunteer next for an impersonation!"

"Why sure Klinger. You seem raring to go," Andrew chuckled at Klinger's enthusiasm. "Go right on ahead."

"Yes sir," suddenly, Klinger stood up, stomped both of his feet once, and then stood in attention as if he was regular-army. "Colonel Blake!? I want a court-martial form! I want both Captain Pierce and Captain McIntyre to be court-martialed, arrested, and thrown into the stockade! They have humiliated me by gluing my boots to the floor! I want satisfaction and I insist that you do something about it or else I'll go over your head again! And this is why I should be in command!"

Everyone seemed a little shocked by how Klinger was talking like a loud-mouthed regular army general. Then, they all started laughing at this. It was clear that Klinger did an impersonation of Frank. Hawkeye and Trapper, in particular, had something to say about it.

"Why Klinger, that was you?" Hawkeye asked rhetorically. "For a minute there, I almost mistook you for Frank."

"You sure sounded like him, that's for sure," Trapper chuckled.

Frank could only scowl at this as he didn't find anything amusing about this. "Now that is not funny! That doesn't sound anything like me!"

"Sure it doesn't Frank," Hawkeye told him sarcastically. "Sure it doesn't."

"You know Klinger, if you nearly fooled us with thinking you were Frank, imagine how many generals you could fool with that impersonation," Trapper remarked. "I bet you could get discharged for impersonating a superior officer."

"Really? I could get a Section 8," this caught Klinger's attention as he looked towards the Colonel. "Colonel, do you think it's possible?"

"Not a chance Klinger. Don't even think about it," Henry told him, dismissing his idea. "It'll be either your butt in the sling or my butt in the sling. Forget it."

"Drat," Klinger snapped his fingers.

"It was a good try though Klinger," Andrew shook his head with a smirk.

"Alright, since we're doing impersonations, let me try one," Hawkeye stepped up and cleared his throat. "Alright guys, that's enough. Arguing like this is getting us nowhere. We should sensibly approach this. After all, I don't see myself as the most efficient doctor in the unit."

As some of the audience were making comments, Andrew was flustered as he blushed at how Hawkeye did an impersonation of him.

"Wow," Andrew gasped. "D-Do I seriously sound like that?"

"Well Andrew, it was bound to happen," Hawkeye shrugged. "One of us would impersonate you eventually."

"Right," Andrew sighed.

"Oh don't mind him, Andrew," Margaret assured him. "I don't think anyone could impersonate you."

"Yeah," Andrew nodded.

"Alright. Since Hawkeye did one, I should do one next," Trapper stood up, took a deep breath, and tried his best to speak like a woman. "Alright, this behavior is unmilitary and unacceptable! I want military discipline! AHH! You two perverts! Animals! How dare you try to expose an innocent young girl taking a shower naked in front of the whole camp!? You are a couple of creeps!"

Nothing but snickers were heard at Trapper's imitation of Margaret, while Margaret seemed flustered as she gave him a cold glare. Andrew was shaking his head while covering his eyes with his hands.

"Alright! Knock it off!" Margaret scolded him. "I don't sound anything like that!"

"Sure you don't," Trapper dismissed.

"Margaret, my dear? I can't believe those captains did that to you," Hawkeye impersonated Andrew again. "Want me to give a kiss to the mouth to make it all better?"

"Oh yes Andrew, my darling. I could kiss you all night if I have to," Trapper imitated Margaret again. "I would love that."

Now both of the Majors were blushing furiously at this as Hawkeye gave Trapper a sly smirk.

"Why Trapper, you naughty devil you," he teased him. "Would you 'really' kiss me on the mouth?"

"Try kissing me and you'll likely taste my fist," Trapper warned with a threat. "And donate a pint of blood too."

"Oh Trap, you wouldn't do that to your bunkmate," Hawkeye told him.

"Well don't press your luck Hawk," Trapper deadpanned.

"Alright. Since they're gonna be that way, I'm gonna try one," Margaret stepped up.

"Go right ahead dear," Andrew encouraged.

"Right darling," Margaret nodded with a smirk before she clear her throat and spoke in a dopey voice. "Oh for Pete's sake. Who in the horse's patoot has been writing the general about how I run things here? I run a hospital. Welp, that's one more thing I have to sign. Radar? Where are the requisition forms?"

"Now let's hold our bladder for a second," Henry spoke up to prevent the snickers that were coming. "Do I sound like that?"

"Wow Henry. Margaret was right about one thing," Hawkeye looked towards him. "You do sound like a spineless, mealymouthed, fly-fishing, inept impostor."

"You only sound like one," Trapper said.

"Okay. Let me try one," Andrew got their attention before he started. "Sir? Here are those forms you wanted. Sign here here here and here."

"Oh good Radar," Margaret continued to imitate Henry. Now give me that clipboard and I'll-"

"Be sure to sign it," Andrew said in unison, speaking like Radar. "Kay sir. That'll be all."

"Good to know," Margaret sighed, finishing her impersonation.

"Did you hear that?" Trapper chuckled. "Andrew did an impersonation of Radar."

"Wow," Radar gasped. "I 'really' sound like that, don't I?"

Hawkeye ignored Radar as he gave Andrew some criticism. "There's just one thing I'd like to say was wrong about your imitation Andrew."

Andrew responded by giving him an annoyed look. "What are you talking about Pierce?"

"You should have gone onto your knees while doing it," he said. "Radar is short. So you have to make yourself short."

"Oh boy," Andrew groaned as more chuckles were heard.

Radar, of course, was not impressed by this. "Hey! I am not short!"

"Alright, before things can get a little hectic," Andrew had his hands up to keep anything from happening. "Radar, why don't you do an impersonation for us?"

"Me?" Radar seemed flustered by that. "Dunno sir...uh, I don't think..."

"Ah come on Radar," yelled Hawkeye. "Join the act. We're all doing it. And besides, you've already done Hollywood impersonations before."

"Yeah Radar. Take a load off," Trapper told him. "Join the club."

"Uhhh...oh. Kay. Fine," Radar let out a reluctant sigh. "But don't make fun o' my height, you hear?"

"Yes, Radar. We'll keep a lid on it," Andrew promised. "Now let's hear it."

"Kay. Here goes nothin'," Radar then stepped up and did his impersonation. "Colonel Blake!? I've got this crisis! I've caught this horrible sickness called hypot...hypother...hy...uh, hypowhatsis, and I'm on your hands. Several doctors, nurses, and patients will be sick, 'less' you sign forms and grant me Section 8 Discharge out o' the army! I won't take no for an answer!"

"Goodness, Radar," Andrew blinked. "I didn't think you had it in you, impersonating Klinger like that."

"Gee, thanks," Radar said out of flattery.

"Wait. Hold on a second there pal," Klinger argued. "You're working my side of the street! Leave the Section 8 capers to me, bub!"

"All he's missing is the dress," Zale snorted.

"You stay out of this Zale," Klinger barked.

"You're gonna make me," Zale queried snidely.

"Damn right I will," Klinger yelled, about to get physical with him.

"Hold it! Hold it! I think we're getting tired of doing impersonations, so let's wrap this up," Andrew got them to stop. "Colonel Blake, if you would finish this up?"

"Guess I don't have a choice. Oh, alrighty. Let me try this," Henry stood up, pulled his pants up, and went on to do a Father Mulcahy impersonation. "Good heavens. I have to donate every penny I got on payday to the orphanage and Sister Theresa. Those kids are God's children, and may the Lord provide them with shelter and comfort."

Everyone decided to applause for that one except for Frank and Margaret, while Andrew was staring at him, taking in how the Colonel just imitate the Chaplin.

"Bravo Henry," Hawkeye clapped. "You did a good job with impersonating our priest."

"I doubt that the Lord will forsake you for that," Trapper added dully.

"Let me say this about that impersonation," the Father decided to comment. "I'm flattered."

"Well Father, we all could use some fun every once in a while," Hawkeye told him. "After all, as I've been wanting to say, 'jocularity, jocularity, jocularity'."

The crowd erupted in applause and laughter at that, as this was turning out to be a better night than they had planned. Even without the movie that they were supposed to get, they could still make the most of it just to bring up morale.

---

Suddenly, the clapping came to a complete halt when Frank stood up, cleared his throat loudly to get their attention, and then he started to sing.

"Ol' Hawkeye and ol' Trapper, they think they're pretty smart. I'd like to take a scalpel and stab 'em in the heart. This is fun," Frank let out a forced laugh before he continued. "Oh, I don't want no more of army life...Gee, Mom...I wanna go...home..."

Frank had trailed off when he noticed everyone giving him a disapproving stare, some of which were glaring at him before turning their heads away. Andrew, however, was a little disturbed by that.

"Uh, Frank," Andrew queried shyly. "Are you feeling alright?"

"Never felt better Major," Frank yelled, laughing awkwardly.

"Right," Andrew decided to change the subject before things got sour again. "Anyway, since we're done with that, I think it's time for a short interlude."

"Interlude darling?" Margaret asked.

"Yes, dear. By that, I mean having Radar show off his drumming talent," Andrew motioned to the drumset and then to Radar. "For he had graciously brought his drumset into the mess tent for us tonight. Radar, would you do the honor?"

"Honor comin' up, sir," Radar saluted before getting up and walking towards the drumset.

"This ought to be good," Hawkeye grinned. "Our Radar is gonna play the drums."

"That's no surprise to me," Trapper retorted. "I've seen him play the edge of a war with a drumstick."

"Hey, can you guys keep quiet," Henry shushed them. "Radar's about to play those drums of his. Alrighty Radar, you may start."

"Yes, Colonel," Radar sat down in the stool behind the drumset and grabbed the two drumsticks. "Well, starting now."

With that, Radar started playing the drums, as everyone else watched. Truth be told, this wasn't the first time that he has done this. There were at least 3 other occasions that he played the drumset. To put it simply, this seemed to be a pretty decent interlude to pass the time.

Well, it seems Radar is doing a good job at playing the drums again. Andrew thought in amusement. I guess it was a good idea to have him play that drumset for all of us. It's helping with easing the mood in this mess tent.

Andrew didn't say another word as they watched Radar play the drums for several more minutes.

Eventually, Radar was just about done with the drumset, which brought an end to his performance. After some of them clapped at this, Radar stood up from the stool and dug his left hand into his back pocket, where his bugle was. He took it out and walked away from the drumset.

"Kay guys. Uh, for that, I'll play the bugle for you," Radar said in an awkward tone before he started blowing into the bugle.

It didn't take long for Radar to start playing an off-key variation of 'Retreat', which got everyone in the crowd to frown. It got annoying fast, for several moments later, the people were complaining about this, while Andrew covered his ears. Some of the personnel threw some of the food in the mess tent at him. This got Radar to cease his performance, and he was able to duck in time.

"Well, that's a good use for the dreck here," Hawkeye quirked.

"Better to throw it at Radar than to eat it," Trapper retorted.

"Alright! Enough of this nonsense," Andrew uncovered his ears. "Radar? You may step down."

"Right sir," Radar sighed before walking back to his seat.

By then, the audience stopped complaining, and they wondered what should be done next.

"What should we do now?" Trapper asked.

It was then Hawkeye got an idea as he snapped his fingers. "I've got a good idea that would make a decent finale to this entertainment night."

"Yeah right," Frank scoffed. "What could you possibly have that could be good enough to close up everything we've done tonight in the mess tent, Pierce?"

"If you hold your warhorse Frank, I'll tell you," Hawkeye stated. "Tonight we have two people in the audience. Both of them are Majors who have proclaimed their love for one another and even announced their engagement to us, and they're about to come up and..."

"Oh stuff it, Pierce. We know you're talking about me and Margaret," Andrew told him. "Come on Margaret, let's get this over with."

"Alright Andrew," Margaret sighed, standing up with Andrew. "The sooner we do this, the better."

"Exactly what I was saying," Andrew remarked as they walked over to the front where the drumset was. "Alright Pierce, what do you have in mind for us?"

"Well, I was thinking that you two could reenact a scene straight from Casablanca," Hawkeye shrugged. "But what am I saying? You two probably don't remember any lines from the movie."

"What are you saying? I've seen the movie before," Andrew glowered. "And I know a couple of lines from the movie."

"Same here," Margaret agreed with an annoyed look.

"Good. Then it shouldn't be a problem to reenact a line for all of us," Hawkeye said.

"Preferably a mushy romantic scene you two," Trapper encouraged.

It didn't take long for the audience to start chanting for them to do a scene from that movie. Andrew did some thinking before coming up with something. He tapped on Margaret's shoulder, leaned in, and then whispered something to her; the scene that he thinks they should do. Margaret was blushing profusely as she wondered if they should do that. Andrew nodded, a sign that they should just get it done and over with. Eventually, they decided to go with it as Andrew then let out a whistle for them to stop.

"Alright, guys! If you all can stop chatting, Margaret and I have the perfect scene to reenact together," Andrew announced with his hands up.

"Well, don't leave us hanging," Hawkeye commented. "Let's see it."

"Make it as obscene as possible you two," Trapper joked dryly.

Both Andrew and Margaret rolled their eyes at that as they then got started on the scene they decided on reenacting. They started by embracing each other in a hug. It was warm and loving. It only lasted for a few moments before they brought their faces close while remaining in that embrace. They were giving each other the lustful gaze as the audience watched in awe.

"The day you left Paris," Margaret recited her line as Ilsa while Andrew was Rick. "You knew what I meant. You knew how much I love you. How much I still love you."

Andrew only nodded his head slightly and let his actions take over. From there, the two of them moved their lips towards each other and engaged in a fairly romantic kiss. This got the crowd to let out 'ooo' sounds and clapped with their hands at the sight of the engaged couple kissing, except for Frank who averted his eyes.

It seemed like they could kiss like that for hours, not paying attention to the crowd. At least until the Captains got their comments out on the matter.

"Well lookie here," Hawkeye smirked. "I couldn't think of a better ending to a movie."

"Yeah," Trapper then decided to tease the two Majors. "You two lovebirds gonna go out and build a nest somewhere? It's the mating season you know."

That was what got the two to separate their lips as they looked on in embarrassment and irritation. Thankfully, the angry gaze lasted for a second before they looked at each other again.

"Margaret, my dear," Andrew imitated Humphrey Bogart's voice as Rick in the movie while caressing Margaret's cheeks. "What do you say we take this somewhere more...private."

"Okay," Margaret nodded with that straight face. "Your tent or my tent?"

"I was thinking that we take this under the chairs in the far back row," Andrew smiled. "Shall we go, honey?"

"Sure thing, darling," Margaret nodded while showing off those teeth of hers. "Let's go."

Andrew only nodded as they stepped away and walked to the far back row of the mess tent, holding hands and showing off those pretty teeth with their smiles. The people they passed let out whistles and hoots in approval, to which the two simply ignored.

"Now then," Andrew spoke seductively when they were under those chairs. "Where were we Margaret?"

"You go first Andrew," Margaret encouraged him, thankful that they couldn't be spotted.

"With pleasure, my fiancee," Andrew puckered his lips and moved them towards her lips, which she puckered in return.

They were now shown under the chairs while kissing and embracing each other like mad. They were in love, and this time, they wanted to show it where no one could witness it. This lasted for several minutes or so.

---

Meanwhile, the crowd settled down after they walked off to make out privately under the back row of chairs. Chatter and discussion were heard amongst everyone as to what they should do now since they've done everything that they could think of. Perhaps now was the perfect time to call it a night?

Fortunately, their question was answered when an ambulance pulled up into the compound and parked right in front of the mess tent, which got everyone to cease the chatter. Sadly, the ambulance, in particular, was filled with some wounded, as the driver got out of the drivers' seat and approached the mess tent where everyone was staying. However, it was what the ambulance driver said next that got everyone on full alert.

"Hey, doctors and nurses! We have wounded!" The driver shouted. "Wounded! We got wounded in the ambulance!"

The first to react to that was Radar, who stood up with that shocked expression as he was heard muttering under his breath.

"Holy cow," it was then Radar made the announcement for everyone to follow before he headed out the door. "All personnel! Incoming wounded! Repeat! Incoming wounded! Casualties in an ambulance outside!"

And that's what did it. Everyone knew what this meant. The war was back in business, even though it was during the night. Not long after, everybody stood up from their seats as they were ready to get to work on the wounded.

"Hmph," Frank huffed as he walked away from his seat. "Some evening this turned out to be..."

"Well Major, look on the bright side," Father Mulcahy assured. "At least we got our spirits up, with whatever available sources of entertainment that were bestowed upon us."

"Got that right Father," Klinger agreed as he and the Father also headed for the door.

"Alrighty, everybody, let's head out and get to work. We got ourselves a new ball game," Henry proclaimed, standing up and heading for the door. "Bring the patients to OR after checking them in triage, scrub up, suit up and prepare for surgery. Let's get a move on people."

"I knew it was too good to last," Hawkeye told Trapper as they watched their nurses head out to get ready for OR. "I was hoping for a more romantic evening with no casualties getting involved."

"Well Hawk, least we got a decent endin' out of it," Trapper shrugged. "We did get to see the two Majors reenact a scene from Casablanca. That's something, ain't it?"

"I guess your right Trap," Hawkeye sighed. "Better than not seeing the film at all."

"I'll say," Trapper agreed as they headed for the door.

By then, Andrew and Margaret had stopped kissing when they heard that wounded pulled up into an ambulance. The two of them crawled out from under the chairs. They nearly bumped their heads on the chairs right as Hawkeye and Trapper headed for the door that the engaged couple was close. Needless to say, the two captains felt the need to comment on it.

"Watch your heads while getting out you two," Hawkeye teased. "We want to treat the casualties and not two members of our medical staff."

"Yeah. We don't need you two to suffer from a head concussion," Trapper added as the two Major got out and slowly stood up. "Especially since one of these patients might likely have a head concussion. We don't need the same thing to happen to our doctor and head nurse."

By the time the two Majors got onto their feet, Hawkeye and Trapper already walked out the door to help out with getting the casualties treated. Andrew shook his head while Margaret sighed in annoyance.

"Well, it was bound to happen eventually," Andrew moaned. "I guess this means our kissing fest will have to be put on hold while we're in OR."

"That's so true Andrew," Margaret muttered. "We'll go to your tent after we're set in OR."

"Good idea Margaret. And besides, we'll at least be together while working on meatball surgery," Andrew smiled warmly. "Ready to work with me side by side while in OR, my dear?"

"Only when you are, darling," Margaret beamed, grabbing Andrew's hand. "Let's go. The others are waiting for us."

"I'm way ahead of you," Andrew nodded proudly.

And so the two Major went outside to join everyone else in getting prepped up for OR so the casualties could be treated. It was a fun and eventful night for everyone at the 4077th, even without the movie. Even with the casualties that just rolled in, tonight was terrific. Needless to say, this was a night that none of them would ever forget. That was a given...

---

END OF CHAPTER 52...

Yeah. This was yet another chapter that took me several days to write, just like the past several chapters in this story. It also doesn't help that the chapters have been lengthy, and this one is no exception. Still, I hope you enjoyed the chapter regardless.

Now, I'm not gonna bother mentioning the slow production, since I've said that before. However, I will say that the chapters being overly long has been dragging, being over 10,000 words. Therefore, in the next chapter, I'm gonna try to make it much shorter than these past several chapters, hopefully, it'll be less than 10000 words in length.

Anyway, for the next chapter, Klinger loses his hearing and goes deaf, wondering what it'd be like not to hear and how he wants to hear again before he goes back to Toledo, and some other stuff will occur. How will things go for Klinger? Will he be able to hear again? Find out, next time, readers.

In the meantime, only leave a review if you want to. There's nothing else for me to say about that.

Otherwise, I got nothing else to say. So until next time, do take care of yourselves. And with that said and done, thanks again for reading folks!