The darkness faded back into life as the poorly connected lights of the carriage flickered back into dominion. Outside the window, the city of Zootopia stood tall, its highest buildings bathed in freshness as the very edge of the rising sun came to touch upon the horizon, leaving the city's streets and the landscape around in murky black: encapsulation of shadow. Despite this re-emerged beauty, it looked just the same as it had before: same towers of emerald, ruby and diamond. The same blue sky, same mountains, same river.
Judy turned back down from the window, slid back into her seat, the floor of the train's carriage rocking a little beneath her feet. There was no need to gaze upon it more. She remember the city, knew it better, deeper than sight alone could tell.
What else was there to expect, even if her mind's eye had wanted to believe at least something would be different. Who really cared, but she, about the mammal who was so dear to her?
It wasn't the same carriage as the one she'd taken on her first journey to Zootopia. She'd just bought the cheapest ticket available: a carriage of least class. She sat with her feet tucked up on the seat, the floor beneath sticky with a dreadful scent of old urine. It didn't matter; the scent couldn't be avoided. Frankly, she was glad it wasn't her own.
The train plunged into darkness, though this time not caused by faulty lighting. Judy's carriage jolted as it entered the tunnel. The rabbit held her breath a moment at the dull pain in her chest from the motion. She'd been told more than once she wasn't taking enough pain pills, but she'd stuck by her decision not to use them any more than necessary.
As the lights inside the carriage flickered once again, the rabbit looked around at the other occupants. None of them were together. None were looking at or talking to each other.
She caught the eye of a female fossa sat across from her. The fossa gazed at the rabbit a moment, then an unsure smile crossed her lips. Judy smiled back, just glad for the small sign of 'normality' in her life, and wondered if she'd recognized her. It wasn't likely, as she didn't look much the same as she had before, or... at least she didn't 'feel' like it.
The carriage jolted again as it left the tunnel, the rabbit's smile turning to a brief wince at the motion.
"You okay?"
The rabbit turned to the fossa to see who the question was directed at. After a moment's ponder, she realized it to be herself. "Hm? Yeah, fine," she said, her voice catching in her throat a moment as she spoke.
The fossa chuckled, shyly. "These old carriages. Bump all over the place. Government has plenty money to maintain the expensive carriages. Never seem to get round to fixing these ones."
"Yeah... that's Zootopia for you," Judy said, looking past the female. "Beautiful, clean, efficient. But what is it really, underneath." She noticed the fossa's questioning gaze and drew herself back from her darkening thoughts. "In some places, at least. Like the inner parts of the city getting all this 'beautification funding'. Other parts, it takes weeks just for a street light to get fixed."
"You should've seen my apartment. After that explosion, all the insulation was ripped off the side and thrown down the road."
"Explosion. The one at the harbor?"
The fossa leaned closer, nodding to the rabbit. "You know, I get that the city was busy with the aftermath of all that, I get it. But still, it was more than a week it was just laying there in the street, and the building still hasn't been repaired. Did you have any problems from it?"
"I... No, I was out of town. For most of it."
"I see. Probably a smart move? Wish I'd had the money to take a holiday out somewhere 'quiet'."
Judy nodded, but didn't add anything further to the conversation, since the train was already slowing as it came into the station, and the two of them would soon be parting ways; her mind thinking over what had passed since last she walked these streets.
The female said a few words of farewell as the train pulled to a stop, then the rabbit took up her case and, begrudgingly, stepped down onto the urine-smelling floor. Rushing to leave this platform, which was sticky with a sickening 'slachh' whenever she lifted a foot, she passed the fossa on her way out to the busy platform.
Her memory flashed back to the first time she was here, the awe she saw all around her at the masses and scale of the place. This time, she just wanted to get through the thick crowd and get to her destination, frustrated by the wall of legs and other body parts which blocked her way.
The 'last class' carriage she'd taken was at the back of the train, with every other mammal on there blocking her path.
She managed to push and slip her way through the masses, reach the escalators, and find her way to the clearing. Nothing had exactly changed, only the pictures and words on the flashing monitors that marketed their messages across the busy crowds below. There was a mild prickle of irritation at this sight, unlike when she first gawked upon this new world.
She gazed up at the largest of the digital boards, to where the face of a gazelle had greeted her before. There was a mammal upon the screen whose face made the rabbit's lip twist. He inclined his head as though to look down on the mammals walking beneath, while an audio clip of his voice echoed out, "The ZPD. Making the law felt throughout the city."
Taxies rumbled in abundance, with most of the larger ones quickly becoming occupied and driving on their way.
The rapid decline in the volume of available transportation didn't bother the rabbit. The price of a taxi from here to the inner city was more than she saw as worthwhile. The underground tramway would take her to the center in even better time anyway, and at a fraction of the cost.
Just about to move on, with the information sign hanging down from a metal pole a few feet from the entrance, Judy heard an echo of confusion from nearby, an echo which stood apart from the standard hubble-bubble of civilian chatter.
"What do you mean you – get your paws off my bags!"
Her ears pivoting towards the racket, hearing cleanly the terror festering the air, the rabbit turned without reservation and rushed at the source of distress. There was the same fossa from the carriage whose bag was being grabbed by two males...
The rabbit slowed at the sight of the familiar blue, the two officers talking to the fossa. After a moment's pause, Judy pressed on, though her pace slower than before, and lightly touched one of the males on the leg.
"Officer, is there a problem here?"
"Move along, please. We've got this under control, Miss."
"You're trying to search this lady's belongings. Do you have any kind of—"
"I said move along."
The tone of the leopard's voice gnawed on Judy's already strained patience. "Officer Delton," she stated, reading the name from his uniform, "you're required by Zootopia law to state plainly and promptly the reasoning for any kind of pedestrian hold-up."
The leopard turned to her with a grunt. "You think you're some kind of legal... wait..."
The rabbit crossed her paws, her irritation quickly rising under the officer's scrutiny. The last thing she wanted to do was waste time here, though she didn't regret stepping in to prevent what looked like an abuse of police power.
"You're... are you Hopps? Officer Hopps?"
"Your point?"
"Wh— well what're you doing here, I thought, I just... Sure, you're here, why would I know what's going on with your life. So, anyway... You're asking about the search? What's the matter? What we're doing here is legal."
"Yeah, 'legal', but it's against PD practice. You can't just take random people and go through their bags, it's just not what we do!"
"Practice? You mean our common behavior brief? It's had some changes since you were out of the game. We're encouraged to make random stop-searches now, especially in places of public transport."
"It's nothing personal," the older, deeper-voiced hyena chimed in. "Nothing 'speciest'. Places where a lot of people go, any depressed areas, places with a higher than average crime-rate... You get the idea."
She'd understood the statement, but Judy's desire to understand more wasn't so easily quenched. "Sure, but what's with the change? Random searches used to be discouraged, without at least some kind of probable cause, even if it wasn't legally 'necessary'."
"Used to be, yeah, 'til... So, you don't know? Don't know about the Chief?"
"Of course I know," she shot, frustrated anyone could think she'd be that ignorant. "Bogo's been... a— and Snarlov's in charge now."
"Erm, no, I... It's McHorn, he's the Chief now." Judy took a step closer to press for information, but the leopard's dodge pulled him out of reach from her as he and his partner hastily paced away.
"What about Snarlov?" she called after them. "Did something happen to her, too?" Definitely they heard her, though they acted as though they couldn't. Biting her lip, the rabbit looked around, and saw the fossa had also slipped away from the background of the conversation. Judy turned back to the towering monitor, where the figure of McHorn was looping its message every few minutes. She gazed with a narrowed brow, only now focusing on the stars and stripes of the 'Chief' of Police.
Turning back to the sign which dangled from a pole a few feet away, the rabbit tightened her grip on her small suitcase and made her way towards the subway: down the steep, concrete steps, into the realm of synthetic lights, cold winds and shadows which lurked beneath the surface of the earth.
A place of eternal darkness.
...
The doors groaned a low, electronic hum as they slid themselves open. Stepping from the cold pavement, Judy entered into the pure-white lighting of the hospital. The air inside was surprisingly fresh and cool. Or perhaps, she noted, she was just used to the scent of disinfectant and didn't notice it so much.
Pacing over the laminate flooring, she passed a few rows of empty seats and the scattering of various mammals, mostly nocturnal.
Coming to the empty reception desk, Judy reached up and pressed the small attached buzzer. It took a few seconds, the rabbit watching the silhouetted movements behind the frosted-glass window, but the figure on the other side slipped out of a blue coat, left it to hang, and pushed open the door, wearing a warm smile as she walked to the rabbit.
"I'm sorry to keep you waiting," she said, taking a seat close by. "My name's Kathy, how can I help you today?" The groundhog held her smile towards Judy for a moment, before she reached across and entered a short password.
"Judy Hopps, here to see Nick Wilde. Here's my ID." Kathy's attention turned in full from the monitor. Judy looked back expectantly, her small paw reaching out, plastic ID card held delicately between two fingers.
The groundhog took the card and glanced towards it, though Judy could tell she was just looking out of habit and not really reading anything. "It's been some time... how are you recovering?"
"I'm fine." Quickly realizing this explanation wouldn't satisfy, she added, "I'm still taking the medication, gentle exercise three times a day, fresh air, simple food..." Judy finished the list of what she hoped would be enough 'recovery-small-talk' to get through the conversation, and held out her paw to try and take back her ID.
Pawing it over, Kathy took a moment to pause. "Judy, do you mind if I let Nurse Flo know you're here? I'm sure she or Doctor Dasse would want to see you."
"I have to... not stay long, there's things I have to do. I just want to see Nick. Just let me see him."
"Okay. Okay, but come back this evening if you can?"
The rabbit nodded, the groundhog turning to the computer. Judy watched the screen as Kathy found 'Hopps, Judith' already on the database, where she was logged in for the purpose of her visit. Then she scrolled to 'Wilde, Nicholas', and clicked the screen.
"Ward D, third floor, room eight-one-two. Let me write it down for—"
"I'll remember. Thank you, I just..." already pacing backwards, the rabbit turned away, keeping her spine straight as she moved. "Thank you."
Checking she'd collected her ID, she slipped it back to where it belonged. She moved swiftly towards the elevator, swift enough that the jolts sent small twitches of irritation down her spine and set her breaths puffing. But her mind was too overstimulated with anxiety and impatience, and her heart too full with hope and desire to care.
...
The elevator and hospital's corridors had been mostly empty, which Judy ascribed to the earliness of the hour. She would be just leaving for work by this point usually, on her way down the steep stairs to be greeted by that flash of russet and charm whose sight she had once looked for every morning.
After arriving at the room and knocking quietly, the nurse in attendance came out to see what the rabbit wanted. With few soft and well placed words, she'd managed to convince the nurse to visit the restroom to make herself a coffee for a few minutes, managed to get some privacy with the fox.
Pushing slowly open the door, Judy glanced back at the nurse as he paced away.
She took a silent step inside, her foot falling on soft carpet. The air was friendly, not sharp with disinfectant; the lighting just enough to feel homely rather than sterile. It was the room of a long-term patient. As she stepped closer to the bed; towards the figure resting within it, she noticed that even the monitoring equipment had a permanent shelving system.
"Hi... Nick, I... it, it's good to see you. After so long." She paused a moment, then paced closer towards the bed. "I hear you're doing well. I'm sorry I... sorry I couldn't see you. After the explosion, I... well, Bonnie, she said... Look, it doesn't matter right now, I'm just glad to see you, I'm so..."
She stepped closer up beside the bed, her fingers clasped in between her paws. She tried to swallow back the growing lump of emotion rising in her chest.
"They... th— they said that, that you can hear me. That you've been responding, or your brainwaves have or something. If you can, I just want you to know that I'm sorry I wasn't here, I'm sorry I wasn't... that I..."
Failing to feel or express anything further, Judy Hopps put her clasped paws around the seemingly slumbering mammal's head.
"I didn't mean— I don't want to unload everything on you like this," she whispered, her voice soft beside the triangular ear of the fox. "Apologies, excuses, explanations all aside. I just want you to know. I'm here for you now. I never meant to abandon you. I never... I never..." The bunny withdrew herself, leaving just her paws resting on the fox's shoulders. She looked down into his vacant expression, his closed eyes, the soft rise and fall of his chest. "Never meant to disappear on you."
A noise caught her attention, her ear pricking towards the source before she turned herself to face it. She gazed blankly for a long moment, then a smile crept upon the corners of her expression.
She chuckled, softly. "I always could spot your 'tells'," she joked. "Even like this, your heartbeat monitor gives you away. You can hear me." She held a smile towards the fox's vacant features, but sighed to herself a moment later. "I just hope you're happy to see me. Not mad I left you deserted like this. It was never my intention, Nick. But I'm not going to make the excuse it wasn't my fault."
Slipping her paws away from his shoulders, the rabbit put one simply to rest on the fox's open palm, careful not to interfere with the IV, finger clip, or any of the other attachments which had been attached or 'inserted' into him. She tried not to pay too much attention, just focusing on his face instead.
"I, ehm... I hope you don't mind, Nick, but I'm gonna 'borrow' your apartment for some time. A few weeks maybe? No more than a month, I promise. My apartment's been rented to someone else. I don't have enough to make a deposit for another place right now. I just need some time until the next paycheck comes in. Um... I know you can't exactly give consent or anything, but I'm sure you understand. I'll pay you! And probably it needs some work doing after the... accident, that happened. I'll fix it up and clean an— and—"
The rabbit bit down on the surging frustration at the sight of the motionless fox, the eternity of unknowing. Her voice tightened, though she tried to keep herself from showing too much emotion, for Nick's sake. "And make it nice for when you get back. I... I'm gonna have to go, Nick. I'll be back this evening. Early. Sorry I can't be here more, I've got a lot of tasks to get through today."
With a final soft touch upon the fox's russet arm, Judy paced back towards the door. Upon opening it, she looked longingly back at the immobile figure of the fox. "I..."
Her eyes closing, paws tightening into small fists, the rabbit forced herself out of the room. She was on the verge of screaming to Nick everything she'd been through, all she'd had to deal with, every raging emotion she felt coursing through her.
All that escaped her was a quiet moan as her soft paws clenched.
...
A cab pulled up against the pavement of a wide and open street somewhere close to the core of Zootopia. The rabbit stepped out slowly, her teeth showing in a wince as she left. She reached back in for a moment, pulled out her small, tin suitcase, before reaching into her pocket and taking out a few coins.
She moved to the cab driver's window and showed the coins. A paw came from inside to take them, but held them up towards the light before gesturing unhappily.
"Well I'm sorry," she said, her voice sincere as it carried across the open space, "I really don't have anything else on me. I'm sorry, I... there wasn't... you don't need..." Glancing over her shoulder at the building beside her, the rabbit's face twitched, this time with agitation rather than pain. She looked back to the cab driver and released a huff, slipping a paw into her pocket. "Judy Hopps, here's the ID, Social is right here. My phone number's none of your business and you don't have the right to demand it of me. I'll be in touch with your company within twenty-four hours, and if I haven't, then go ahead and press charges."
The rabbit took back the card, turned and marched away, her ears dropped against her head, the cab driver uttering obscenities in her general direction. She knew she could've used the bus, even if there was no subway to take her to her new destination. There were no more funds, no more savings. She just didn't want the noise and attention of the public transport; she wanted quiet, she wanted privacy to gather her thoughts.
Raising her head, trying to put a sense of 'backbone' into her step, the rabbit got to the main entrance of the ZPD HQ. The automatic doors slid open to her arrival, and as she stepped inside, her appearance was that of confidence incarnate. Who was to know her every swaggered-step was bribing her twitches of exasperation, or that her stomach was churning as much as on her first day of coming in to work?
Above her, a new slogan had been placed upon the sign, its letters of steely white glinting in the early morning sun...
"Zootopia Police Department: Making the Law felt Throughout the City"
Author's notes:
Hesitance jumps around your mind,
Grooms decision thus chosen blind.
Your thoughts most succulent of snack,
All delivered by luscious feedback.
So don't hide like a tiny shrew,
Thus share that belovable review!
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