"WELL OUR STORY OPENS TODAY WITH ROCKY AND BULLWINKLE ON A FLIGHT TO EUROPE. SINCE ROCKY HAD RECENTLY DONE A NEWFANGLED DNA TEST ONLINE, HE AND BULLWINKLE LEFT THEIR SMALL TOWN OF FROSTBITE FALLS IN ORDER TO SEARCH FOR ROCKY'S ANCESTORS."

"I already know where my ancestors came from!" Bullwinkle replied.

"AND WHERE WOULD THAT BE?"

"Why, Ottawa!" Bullwinkle exclaimed, waving a tiny Canadian flag.

"You're Canadian?" Rocky asked.

"Last I checked I was Bullwinkle." The moose replied. "But they migrated to Frostbite Falls all the time!"

"Cool!" Rocky replied, then pulled out the DNA results he'd printed. "Mine says I'm mostly from the States, also England, some Spain, a little Germany, but also from this one small area called…" Rocky gazed closer at the odd print. "…Hääng, Sweden?! I've never even heard of that place."

"Doesn't seem to be on any map…" Bullwinkle replied, looking at a world map.

"MEANWHILE, WITHIN THE CARGO HOLD OF THE PLANE BOUND FOR EUROPE, A VERY STRANGE CONVERSATION WAS TAKING PLACE…"

"—Da, Fearless Leader, sir…" Boris replied to FL's call from his video-watch.

"Ohh, ven müse and skvirrel crash, ees gon' be bloodbath for certain!" Natasha smirked, rubbing slim hands. "Boris, chu are genius!"

"IT WAS A CONVERSATION BETWEEN FEARLESS LEADER AND THOSE TWO POSITIVELY AWFUL, DISGUSTING SCUM OF THE EARTH-TYPE VILLAINS, THOSE NOSE HAIRS ON THE—"

(Boris stands on his toes and pulled the narrator's face down to his level for a moment. He brings the face of the narrator slightly closer, both hands on it.)

"—Bub, ow' many times I goink to heff to tell yu dis?!" Boris replied, then cleared his throat before shouting from the top of his tiny yet voluminous lungs; "SAY! OUR! NAYYYYYMESSSS-UH!"

"UGHHHH…" the narrator mumbled like an agitated teenager. "OKAY…Burish an' Netesh…"

"Come on, dollink, vill yu juhst say eet already?!" Natasha exclaimed, then gazed at a small watch around her tiny left wrist. "Ve need to git plot movink along!"

"Bmfh a nmhfnfn…" The narrator continued mumbling, not wanting to say the two villains names in the slightest.

"Come onnnnn…" Boris replied, stamping his feet in agitation a little. "JUHST! SAY! DE NAYMES!" He punctuated his words by jumping up and down.

"…BORIS AND NATASHA!!" The narrator practically shouted at the two spies, ever so exhasperated.

"Dere ve go!" Boris replied, giving a sigh of relief alongside Natasha. "Ees more like eet, buhster!"

"QUICKLY, BORIS ACTIVATED THE BOMB, WHICH BLEW UP THE LEFT ENGINE, TO THE SHOCK OF EVERYONE ON THE PLANE, ESPECIALLY ROCKY AND BULLWINKLE. HE AND NAT ALSO MADE A QUICK ESCAPE BEFORE IT COULD BLOW UP."

(*KA-BLOOEY!!*)

"HOKEY SMOKES!" Rocky exclaimed, tail fur on end.

"JEEPERS!" Bullwinkle exclaimed as the plane experienced turbulence. "We must've hit a speed bump!"

"In the AIR?!" Rocky exclaimed. "C'mon, Bullwinkle, we've gotta save these people before we crash!"

"AND SO, ROCKY AND BULLWINKLE QUICKLY GATHERED EVERY MAN, WOMAN, AND CHILD AND GAVE EACH ONE A PARACHUTE, ALONG WITH THE CAPTAIN, UNTIL THERE WAS ONLY ONE LEFT AND THE PLANE WAS MOMENTS FROM REACHING THE GROUND."

"BULLWINKLEEE!!" Rocky tossed the parachute to the moose. "You've gotta JUMP!"

"Uhh…HOW DO I KNOW YOU'RE GONNA BE FINE?! I GOT TH' LAST PARACHUTE!" Bullwinkle replied.

"Cause I can fly, remember?" Rocky replied.

"Oh yeah." Bullwinkle responded before leaping from the plane. "GER-RONI-MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSE!!!"

"ROCKY QUICKLY FOLLOWED BEHIND THE MOOSE AND EVENTUALLY, HE PULLED THE CORD ON BULLWINKLE'S PARACHUTE, ALLOWING HIM TO MAKE A NICE, GENTLE LANDING…..while the rest of the plane blew up over in the distance."

(*KA-BLOOEY AGAIN!*)

"Hokey smokes, I'm glad we're okay." Rocky replied to Bullwinkle. "I wonder where we are…"

"Duh….looks like we're in Tampa." Bullwinkle replied, gazing at the new surroundings. "Either that or Poughkeepsie."

"AH, BUT HOW WRONG BULLWINKLE WAS, FOR THAT DENSE JUNGLE COULD ONLY MEAN ONE THING, THEY'D LANDED IN EAST AFRICA, MORE SPECIFICALLY IN THE BUKUVU PROVINCE. THE BUKUVU, FORMERLY KNOWN AS MBWEBWE UNTIL GAINING INDEPENDENCE IN 1997, IS A RELATIVELY DANGER-FILLED JUNGLE AREA, WHERE ANYTHING CAN AND WILL KILL THOSE WHO ARE UNLUCKY ENOUGH TO ENCOUNTER ITS CREATURES. HOWEVER, THERE IS A SILVER LINING."

"There IS?!" Bullwinkle exclaimed.

"YES THERE IS. ACCORDING TO AFRICAN LEGEND, A WHITE APE-MAN WAS DISCOVERED BY A GORILLA AROUND THIRTY YEARS EARLIER. HE IS NOW THE PROTECTOR OF THE JUNGLE..but rarely seen by any foreigner."

"You call that a silver lining?" Rocky retorted.

"It's really more of an aluminuminuminum lining…" Bullwinkle spoke, struggling to say the word "aluminum".

"TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR "Bullwinkle Sees Spots", or "Goodbye, Kitty!"!"