"You know maybe I shouldn't have asked for your help." Captain Benson yelled at him.
"You know if you didn't want my help, why did you even ask?" He yelled back.
"Alright, I know this case has been hard on all of us." Rollins chimed in.
The squad has been working this sex trafficking ring for the last few months and couldn't get anywhere with it. Not until they realized Organized Crime had a connection with it. That's when they called Bell and Stabler was put on this case to work alongside the 1-6. At first, Stabler and Benson thought it would be a good idea to work a case like this together. Both in charge, just like the good 'ole days. Things quickly changed as soon as they started working together. Benson wanted to do one thing, him another. Rollins eventually told Olivia that she was in charge, she is a higher rank, she can't still believe she and him are still equals. Not in the work world. When this finally resonated with her, she agreed and pulled rank here and there. Elliot of course accepted this, but it wasn't easy for him to realize she was now acting as his Commanding Officer, and not partner anymore. At least for not this case.
"Benson," Liv said answering her phone. "Great, thanks. I'll be right there." she hung up the phone. "Victim at Mercy Hospital. I'm gonna go talk to her. Fin, Rollins go talk to Warner and see where we are with the DNA tests." she grabbed her things and walked away.
"Sarg," Elliot said to Fin. Fin turned around. "What should I do?"
"Go home," Fin told him. "Go see your kid man, you shouldn't be here anymore."
Elliot listened to Fin and made his way to the elevator. "Hold the door!" Elliot said running and putting his arm through the elevator door so it wouldn't close. He walked in to see the only other person in it was Olivia. It was an awkward silence.
As they made their way down to the first floor the elevator came to a halt. They were stuck there for who knows how long. They stood there for a few moments without talking. Olivia pulled out her phone and called Fin telling him about their situation. Next, she called Lucy asking if she could pick up Noah from school.
"Thanks, Lucy, I owe you," she said and hung up.
"Lucy, is that the nanny?" Elliot asked.
"Yeah. Noah loves her." Liv said putting her phone away.
"Look, I'm sorry if I overstepped at any point," he mentioned
"I know. It's just different. We aren't equals anymore, at least not at work."
"I know." he paused. "I'm proud of you," he said looking over at her making eye contact.
She gave a small smile, "Fin, said he's going to call the fire department, see if they can get them over here soon."
Elliot took a small deep breath before saying his next words. "Look, I don't know if you got my voicemail or not but-"
"I did. I meant to call you back, but work-"
"I get it. If you don't want to talk about it, I get that too."
"No, let's. I mean there isn't much else to do anyway." they were both still standing in two different corners of the elevator.
"I meant everything I said," he said looking at her. "You've really been there for me, and the kids. And I haven't been there for you at all. You deserve better Liv."
"Elliot, you don't-"
"No, I mean it. Every time I got shot, my marriage, that case with Dickie and Shane. Hell, if it wasn't for you who knows if Eli would've survived. Liv, you've been there for me when I needed you, and I haven't been there for you at all. And I'm sorry. I should've been there. I should've told you about my leaving, moving to Rome, and my return. I just thought maybe you didn't want to hear from me ever again. And then that letter, I wasn't even sure if I wanted to give it to you, but I knew Kathy wanted you to read it, so I gave it to you."
"Elliot, you've been going through a lot. I get that. You need to be there for your family. I understand, family is important."
"So who's the guy?" Elliot asked.
"What?"
"Noah. I mean Noah's father. Fin mentioned you had a son and you were in a relationship, I just thought-"
"Thought that that relationship left with me with a son?"
"Yeah, just know whoever the guy is I'll kill him."
"That's good to know, but no, it's nothing like that, not at all. Two completely different things. I adopted Noah after we found him during an investigation."
"Oh, adoption, good for you. I told you they were wrong." He smiled. "But who's the guy?"
"That's not really relevant," she added.
"C'mon Liv, we haven't ketched up, since ever, and now we have nothing else to do."
"Ed Tucker," she blurted.
"Ed Tucker?! IAB Ed Tucker?!"
"It's not what you think. We really had something going for a while, but he just wasn't the one I guess," she said making eye contact with him. "He got remarried and he retired. But before we broke up he was diagnosed with brain cancer-"
"Liv, I'm sorry."
"It's okay, honestly. But um, there's something else you should know. I know you didn't like the guy, and I don't blame you for the way he treated you. But listen, he was diagnosed kind of late into his treatment. At his retirement party, a former officer accused him and his former partner of rape. He didn't remember any of that happening, due to his cancer he couldn't remember much. And because of his cancer and everything else going on, he didn't want to be a burden to his wife-"
"Liv, what are you getting at?" He said knowing what the next words were going to be.
"He ate his own gun." She said holding back tears.
"I'm so sorry, I didn't know."
"Of course you didn't, you were living in Rome at the time. There's no possible way you would've known."
"Again, I'm sorry."
"Yeah, me too."
"Liv, I know there's a lot that I missed, and there's a lot I should've been there for. Before and after I left. So if there's anything you need, just know I'm here for you."
"How's Eli doing?" Liv asked.
"He's ok. I mean he isn't really talking to me that much. Not since the other night with the drugs. But he knows not to take her pills anymore and sell them."
"I'm glad you guys talked. And I'm sorry if I overstepped that night, I just thought you should've known."
"No, I'm glad you told me. Otherwise, I could've lost my son too." There was a brief moment of silence.
"The basement," Liv stated.
"What?" he asked with confusion.
"Sielview, back in the day. When I was undercover, he took me down to the basement, where he would assault women-"
"Liv, please don't go there. I didn't- will I wanted to- maybe I still want to know. Liv just please don't tell me that you were one of those women."
"It was the closet thing, until William Luis."
"William Luis?"
"Yeah, I thought maybe you would've heard about it from Fin or one of the other detectives."
"No, Liv, if this something personal they would've let you tell me. But if you don't want to, it's none of my business."
"No, you should know. You deserve to know."
"Ok, I'm ready whenever you are."
"Are you sure you can handle this?"
"I'm not sure, not unless you tell me."
"Alright, just, if you get uncomfortable at any point just tell me and I can stop."
"Ok…"
"So about 2 or so years after you left, we caught a case, a man was flashing his penis to women in the park. He brought him in. He had no ID, nothing-"
"Fingerprints?"
"Burned those. The man was a psycho. We took him to court. Our ADA at the time Barba didn't have much to go off of to make a case, so we ended up losing. Cragen knew this was a tough case for me. Long story short I went home and took a few days off.
I went home and when I got there he was there, in my apartment, he pointed my own gun at me. He tied me to a chair, burned me with keys, forced sleeping pills down with vodka."
"Liv- I'm so sorry. I didn't know-" he had tears forming in his eyes.
"It gets worse. He took me into his car and drove me to his lawyer's parent's house where he killed the father and made me watch him rape and almost murder the mother. It was horrifying."
"Where was the squad? Cragen, Munch?"
"Well, I was given a few days off, everyone thought I needed space. Cassidy hadn't heard from me in a few days and talked to Nick, my partner after you. They didn't think much of it, except it was odd I wasn't answering calls or texts."
"I would've noticed you were missing."
She smiled, knowing that he still cared about her and knew her that well. "He took me to this beach house and handcuffed me to the bed. He told me all the things he was going to do to me. And how I was going to think about the person I'd want to see the most before I died. Cause I honestly thought I was going to die. It wasn't until then until I realized the person I wanted to see the most was you-"
"Liv-"
"Look it's over now. He's dead and that's all that matters. I still have horrifying dreams about those days and weeks to follow but I've gotten through the roughest times."
"So when you said I have PTSD-"
"I knew because I went through the same thing."
"I'm sorry I ever doubted you," he said starring into her eyes. "So you said he is dead?"
"Yeah, suicide, I was there."
"Wait, what?"
"Yeah, after the trial day he was sent to jail. He escaped somehow. He kidnapped a 12-year-old girl, said if I didn't come to him she was dead. We went up to a tower in the middle of nowhere and he was going to assault me, but didn't. So instead, we played Russian Roullete with his pistol. One bullet 5 chambers. I thought I was a goner. But the last one he took it to his head." She looked over at Elliot and he was standing there looking at his feet with a confused, yet frustrating look. "Elliot?" she added.
"She knew."
"What?"
"Kathy. She knew."
"What are you talking about?" Liv asked confused.
"Mama told me the other day that Kathy told her a guy hurt you. I just assumed she was having an episode. I talked to Kathleen about it, but she said not to worry about it. Which is why I didn't reach out. Thought it was none of my business. But I guess mama was telling the truth. But why didn't Kathy tell me? If she knew didn't she want me to know?"
"Elliot, you were in Rome. She probably didn't want you flying out here to see me." Elliot punched the elevator wall in anger.
"She knew though. What else did she know and didn't tell me?"
"Elliot, don't say that. She was your wife. She loved you. And you loved you. She was probably just doing what she thought was best."
"But past tense loved. Liv that was all in the past. We're in the present now. I don't even know who she is anymore. How could she lie to me all these years? Every time I asked if she heard from you she'd always say it went to voicemail, or you know time difference is hard."
"Elliot, I never got any missed calls from her."
"Of course you didn't. I don't even know who I was married to anymore. You know sometimes I wish we never got drunk and slept together. Maybe I should've signed those divorce papers sooner. Maybe my life would've been a lot easier."
"Elliot, don't say that. You wouldn't have had your kids. You love them."
"Yeah, I do. It's just hard to know that if it wasn't for that one night, that we probably wouldn't have gotten married. Let alone be reckless teenagers."
"You can't dwell on the past."
"I know. It's just hard now though. You know without her here. I really just don't know what I'm doing anymore. Everything was just so much easier when she was here."
"You're a good dad Elliot. I've seen you raise your kids since I met you. They really look up to you."
"Yeah, tell that to Eli."
"Trust me, he'll come around, just give it time."
"Call me when Noah turns 13 and you're dealing with this."
"Haha, ok. But look, if you need anything just know you can call me. I'll be there."
"I know, thanks."
"Did you really think that being uc was going to make your life easier?" she asked.
"I don't know. It just felt good to not be me for once. You know, with everything happening at home and us. It was like I was a whole new person. But I'm glad you told me you were worried, cause honestly I was worried that I was getting too deep undercover."
"Are you going to tell me what happened between you and Flatura or whatever her name is?"
"You don't want to know." he said.
"Fine, but if one day she comes knocking on your door saying she's pregnant with your child then what?"
"I don't think that will be happening. But thanks for your concern."
"So you like your new squad? What happened to your old partner Nick?"
"Yeah, very much so. Nick, he got shot in the knee. He knew recovery was going to be rough. He has a daughter Zara, and later found out he has a son, Gil, with a women he had relations with while he was uc, before coming to SVU. Both Zara and Gil's mother moved to California. After getting shot he decided to move out west with them. To be closer to them."
"Good guy?"
"Wasn't anything like you, but he was good in a different way. But thanks to you, he felt the need to fill your shoes."
"Ha, you and Rollins seem pretty close. History there?"
"Yeah, it was weird having another female detective in the room. But once we got closer we really bonded. I helped her through some tough times and she helped me."
"She doesn't seem to like me."
"Yeah, she just doesn't understand why I'd hang around with a guy like you."
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"Well you've broken some rules in the past, of course we all know that, and you just kind of do whatever you want-"
"I was kidding." he said with a smile.
"So, you like your new task force?"
"It's different from SVU and from what I had in Rome. But I love working with Bell. She's the best, next to you of course. Jet is cool, doesn't talk much but does her job well, which is probably why I like working with her."
"And Morales and Washburn?"
"Honestly, I thought Washburn was the mole, not Morales. Not really sure what happened there but I guess more investigating needs to be done. So how did you know I was going to be at the hospital that night?"
"I got a text, which I now know is from Wheatley."
"Wheatley? Richard Wheatley?"
"Yeah why?"
"Just curious. Why'd you come?"
"Thought it was you at the time. But curious that you called me 'O' in the text, but never really understood until we saw him at the courthouse."
"What if I wasn't there at the hospital?"
"Who knows what would've happened."
"Liv, I can't loose you on top of everything else."
"You're not going to loose me, not again."
They stared at each other for a few moments and the elevator started to move again. They made it to the first floor and the doors opened.
"Hey, can I get you a drink?" he asked.
"I would love to, but I should probably get home before Noah has to go to bed."
"I understand, next time." they smiled and parted ways.
From the author: Let me know if you want to see more.