Introduction

Hello! This has been an idea crawling around in the back of my mind since I discovered fanfiction a few years ago (one of my teachers actually assigned it in school. I was surprised, but did more research anyways). So I know everybody has different opinions about the Hogwarts Houses and there are sometimes these very hilarious descriptions, canon (what JKR wrote) and fanon(fan canon, what fans wrote). Anyways, I have tons of these stockpiled, as in not five chapters like I have whenever I start a new story. I mean like hundreds, possibly a thousand or so.

So, I've decided to apologize for the fact that I had a math exam today that I had to study for last night, as well as gymnastics (I almost got a routine and my front-handspring step out roundoff back handspring back layout combo, though i did get a front tuck step out front handspring roundoff. This is all on a tumble track, of course. I'm not there yet to do it on the floor or add it to my routine, one coach injured the other absent for that practice), for those of you who know (american) women's Gymnastics.

So yeah, this will be a thing I solemnly swear I am not up to no good (sorry marauders) where I might do either hp-related rants or funny little things I have saved from my scouring of the internet.

So yeah, today I will post 3, as an apology for lack of anything yesterday. But unless I need to do more apology chapters, it will be only one a day.

Todays:

funny mini crack fic (this will be most of these.)

McGonagall: Well, what have you learned from your time at HOgwarts?

Hermione: Disfiguring people I don't like with magic is a great idea

Harry: Everyone is trying to kill me always, and anything I think isn't real and I'm imagining is very much real and usually Voldemort's fault. MOODY WAS RIGHT!

Ron: never, ever, listen to Hagrid

Neville: Beheading snakes solves all my problems *thumb's up*

Ginny: when in doubt, bat bogey hex (for all low-key fans, that hex is really a very painful curse that could destroy a nose. Maybe someone hit Voldemort with that? It basically transforms snot (bogeys) into bats, when ginny means it they can be very vicious)

Parvati: don't date the chosen one

Lavender: or his best friend

Draco: my father shouldn't (read will) hear about this (what exactly is this?)

Goyle (crabbe was the one that dies took me a while to tell the difference): setting fires in an enclosed room - bad idea.

Seamus: *BOOM!*

Dean: don't sleep in the same room as Harry Potter. Or Ron Weasley for the matter

Luna: I learned where Snape keeps his secret stash of firewhiskey for when Harry nearly dies. though there's not that much left.