[Nothing is set in stone]
Boring is all Natsuki Subaru a shut-in neet could describe the night he was having "Jesus this day couldn't get any more boring than it is, urgh stop complaining just go in the convenience store, get your stuff, pay, and get out" Subaru internally berates himself for complaining about doing such a simple task, After a while of internally berating himself and walking in the night he came across his destination. Upon entering the convenience store, Subaru looks around to see if anything has changed since his last visit "Huh... who would have guessed... nothing has changed since last time" Subaru is greeted by the middle-aged cashier with enough freckles to make even the galaxy envious "Yo Kenshi's son how are you? a boring night ain't it." Subaru sighs at the remark although harmless it reminded him of how inferior he is compared to his father.
"Hey, my name's Subaru!" Subaru said in protest to the man's remark "And yeah to answer your question, I'm doing alright although I'm bored out of my mind" The man scoffs at Subaru answer of being bored "Yup I feel for ya, the winds are howling, the moon is shining-" Off to the distance one can hear the howling of stray dogs "Oh and how can I forget the dogs are howling, on nights like these..." The man pauses and looks at Subaru who in all aspects was ignoring him and looking at some mangas, mumbling to himself about something. "We should be asleep don't ya think Subaru?" The cashier said in a loud enough tone to bring back our teenage shut-in back to reality "Huh?" That was all that was said by the shut-in as he try to process what the cashier had asking of him "Oh...yeah we should all be asleep, yup definitely" The cashier looks at Subaru with a deadpan look suggesting that he knows that Subaru hasn't been paying attention at all.
"Alright enough talking I'll leave ya alone to concentrate on your purchases." The cashier said as he turned on the wall-mounted TV, changing it to the news channel, It showed a well-dressed woman who seems to be talking about the increasing epidemic that is suicide plaguing people around the country. "-And because of that these people lives have ended too soon, the president has stated that they will implement a suicide prevention that wil-"
Subaru decided not to waste his time listening to something that doesn't affect him instead he looks back at his items that he was going to buy 'Let's see what I have here salted chips, shrimp noodles, a water bottle, and this manga that seems interesting' Subaru nods as he got everything he wanted from the convenience store and walks towards the cashier "Oh ready to pay I presume" the cashier said as he lowers the volume of the TV "Yeah I mean what else would I be walking over here for if it isn't to pay" The shut-in said as he placed his items on the counter and took out his wallet "Who knows maybe yar wanted to chat with this old man" the cashier says as he scans the items on the counter "$4.95" He said as he was placing the items in a plastic grocery bag, while doing so Subaru took out his money only to find a grooved coin "Oh a grooved coin, I can't spend you on something like this" Subaru mumbled this to himself as he placed the coin back and got a different one out "Here you go" Subaru said as he placed the money on the counter and grab the grocery bag and walks towards the exit "Have a save night Subaru and remember to always save!"
Confused, Subaru looks back at the old man to ask him what he meant by 'Saving' only to see a younger man standing behind the cashier "Wha- Hey what happened to the old man?" Subaru asks the young man behind the cashier "Huh what old man? It's just you and me here...weirdo" The cashier said as he turned up the volume on the TV trying to ignore Subaru and hoping he'll go away "Am I just imagining things now?" Subaru whispers to himself as he exits the store with his bag 'Today couldn't get any weirder' Subaru internally says as he takes out his phone to check the time only to be greeted by a message from an unknown number "It's probably just some spam" Although something was wrong, Subaru felt inclined to see the message...No he needed to see almost as if he didn't click it he'll die right where he stood "you know what, what's the harm of seeing it" Subaru said as he opens up the message to see one word in bold letters 'DETERMINATION'
In an instant, Subaru fell down struggling to breathe 'FUCK SHIT I CAN'T BREATH!' he says internally as he tries to get up, only for his legs not to respond to his will... No almost all his body didn't respond to him as he continues to struggle with his breathing only having a little bit of time before his throat squeezes shut, Subaru cries and prays to every god he could think of to save him 'PLEASE I DON'T WANT TO DIE LIKE THIS!' Out of the corner of his eyes, Subaru spots a figure closing in on him
"h-hel-p m-me" was all Subaru could say as he continues to struggle on the ground hoping for the figure to speed up and help him.
But that was not the case for Subaru. Instead, the man walks right past him as if Subaru wasn't there in the first place and goes inside the convenience store 'Wh-what?' Was all the dumbfounded shut-in thought as his tears stop pouring out and his consciousness starts fading away 'I d~don't w~ant to di~' And those were the final words that Natsuki Subaru said before he died.
"why, why did it happen-" "I'm pathetic I couldn't even-" "FUCK THAT GUY FOR NOT HEL-" "Mom, Dad I'm sorr-" "I should have gotten out mor-" "I SHOULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING BETTER WITH MY LIF-" "I'm worthles-" "Let me get a secou-" Emotions, rage, self-loathing, hope, sorrow, despair, shame, desire, these are all the things Subaru felt as his soul wanders around in the grey wasteland that we call purgatory, Subaru has been wandering around for thousands if not hundreds of thousands of years reliving the moments he had with his family before that dreadful night before he died inside his head
Subaru for all his wandering saw many beings but none look the same, for every entity Subaru saw walking they all had different features, one would have long legs that you'll think he come right out of a horror show, another would have eyes all over his body and in all different sizes as well, Subaru saw many, many more anomalies as he continues to walk for all of eternity
Well, that's what he thought after 748,989 years of walking and regretting his choices in life when he was alive. Although he was glad that now he had a more clear mind... as clear as it can be, after all these years Subaru has crossed the bridge from insanity and sane multiple times leaving him to wonder why he's even in this place in the first place. Was it because of something he did? Was it because of something he didn't do? Did he pray to the wrong god? Was it because he didn't do more to help? Was it because of his slothfulness? Subaru himself may never know the reason why he's in here, but what he does know is that he wants out and the second he finds a way out he'll take it no matter what even at the cost of millions of lives. That's just how 'Determined' he was.
Luckily for Subaru, he wouldn't have to wait any longer as off to the distance he can see what looks like a star? "oorh" Subaru tries to speak with his mouth but it has been too long since he really spoke a single coherent word physically at least, After a couple hundred years of wandering closer to the star shape beacon, Natsuki Subaru finally saw the star shape in all its glory. It was a yellow four-point star that could fit inside of his palm if he oh so desired to grab it... which he did with no hesitation, as he touches it a voice sprang inside his head
'Determination [incalculable] Body [strangely weak] mental fortitude [strong] mental health [boarding near insanity] magic [weak] strength [strangely weak] spirit affinity [strangely strong] magic type [dark] intelligence [high] wisdom [weak] agility [weak] crossdressing [incalculable] L.O.V.E [1] PLAYER IS VALID, AUTHORIZING SANITY BOOST, AUTHORIZING DETERMINATION, AUTHORIZING TRANSFER TO R.E:Z.E.R.O_184092_ MAY DETERMINATION BE ON YOUR SIDE PLAYER
'WH-WHAT'S GOING ON-' Subaru didn't have enough time to process what the voice was as a cloud of darkness comes out of the star and consumes him and the surrounding environment, hours have passed by with absolutely nothing happing 'damn so now I'm stuck here for eternity, if that's the case I rather go back to walking at least then I'll be seeing things instead of being fucking blind' Subaru continues to talk to himself for what seems like days until a bright flash of light violates his eyes 'urgh what the hell' Subaru tries to lessen the light by hovering his hands in front of his hands unfortunately, the black smoke didn't allow such a privilege and Subaru had to take the full flash until it dissipates 'fucking hell when will this shit stop!?' Fortunately for Subaru, the light dissipated while his eyes were trying to adjust themself into this new environment 'urgh what the hell w-wa-snow?' It was strange, Subaru had lived for hundreds of thousands of years in a grey wasteland with absolutely no colors and where everything felt the same and tasted the same even the other entities tasted all the same and that's not mentioning how there aren't any seasons over there in the wasteland. So how does Subaru remember snow? Well not that it matters for him as he kept on touching the white fluffy substance called snow 'I-I'm really out of there?' It dawned on Subaru that he was in a different place, A better place than the wasteland. Subaru for all his regretting and insanity cried, he cried for the first time in a very long time
'Huh, so I still remember what snow is... but how? It's been so long that I should have forgotten all about it since there was no snow in Japan at the time and I couldn't have kept remembering it as I did with the convenience store... Now that I think about it, can I remember other stuff as well?' Subaru dug deep into his memories to see if he could remember anything before that dreadful night, he didn't have to dig deep as the memories from childhood all the way to his death flood in like a tsunami drowning him with a whirlpool of emotions. Subaru lifts up his hands to cover his eyes as he starts to cry once again as he is overcome with happiness and sorrow. Happiness for being able to remember all the good times he had with his mother and father and sorrow for not being able to see that again and for not saying goodbye...to his mother oh how Subaru wishes to be able to go back in time and say goodbye and not act like such a stuck up bitch. But Subaru, who strangely accept the fact that that is impossible and that he can't change the past ' 'sniffle' I may not be able to change the past but I'll be damn if I won't take this chance to carve out my future' Subaru says internally
[Feeling the cold on your skin, the warmth of the sunlight, and knowing you have a future fills you with DETERMINATION] 'WHAT THE!' Subaru quickly stands up and swiftly looks around his surroundings to find the source of the voice "waght thyre?!" Subaru tries to speak but gets a cold reminder that he hasn't spoken physically for hundreds of thousands of years 'Damn IT I can't even fucking talk CALM down Subaru you don't see any near so I think we're safe' Although speaking physically wouldn't be a problem in the wasteland since everything could just communicate with each by telepathically, Subaru found this the hard way when he insulted a multi tentacle giant... that was not a pleasant experience for him 'Okay Subaru focus if the voice didn't come from outside of your mind then it came from the inside... goddamn it how could I forget the basics it always comes from the inside never the outside remember that idiot also didn't the voice sound familiar?' Subaru mentally asks himself as he tries to recall where he had heard the voice before
'THAT'S IT, it came from that star shape thing but why did it speak and why did it start talking about traits? Now that's the real question I should be asking. Also didn't it say like how... What do you call them again? Isekai manga where the world or gods give abilities or whatever?' Subaru asks himself as he tries to recall the manga he used to love reading over 748,000 years ago which surprisingly was quite easy for the ex shut-in 'Huh so I still remember it but I can't exactly remember the details which is normal by all means...I think? But enough of all that let's get back to business,' Subaru said mentally as he straightened his back while he made a fist with one hand and smashes it into the other open hand.
'S-so huh?' Subaru shivers violently as he enters hyperthermia from just standing in the cold 'SHIT NO NO NO HOW COULD I FORGET ABOUT HYPERTHERMIA FUCK' Subaru quickly picks a direction and runs with all the might he could muster up while slowly freezing to death 'NO NO COME ON I JUST ESCAPE THAT HELL HOLE I DON'T WANT TO DIE FUCKING NOW!' Subaru kept running and running hoping to find any kind of civilization whether they let him in or not, Subaru does not care he'll force himself inside even if it meant killing adults or children...Subaru will not waste this second chance given to him 'COME ON I KNOW THERE'S BOUND TO BE PEOPLE SOMEWHERE! WHERE THE FUCK ARE THEY!' unfortunately for Subaru he wouldn't get a chance to test his resolve as there is no village near him in a fifty-mile radius of him but he didn't have such knowledge like you and I have
Luckily for him, there are plenty of demon beasts in the cold icy forest who will test his resolve for him 'FUCK WHERE ARE THEY!' Subaru demands to know where civilization is, fortunately something does answer him "GRRR" Unfortunately it's the growl of what looks like dark wolf size animals with grotesque spikes coming out from every inch of its body and one large one on his snout, and oh boy do they look hungry for some shut-in meat 'FUCK ANOTHER ABOMINATION, LIKE I HAVEN'T SEEN ENOUGH OF YOU GUYS BACK IN HELL' Subaru thought as he kept running away from the monstrosities which were now behind, Unfortunately they didn't stay behind for very much time as they quickly maneuver around the trees and branches making almost zero sound if it wasn't for the gut-wrenching howling that would make any normal man defecate themself on the spot luckily Subaru has already seen monsters beyond one's imaginations 'COME ON KEEP GOI-' "AYCK"
Sadly even seeing abominations that are comparable to H.P Lovecraft wasn't enough to survive these wolves as they quickly caught up to him and bite deep into his shoulder making Subaru land hard on the snowy ground 'FUCK GET OFF ME!' "ARHK" Subaru struggles with the massive spiked wolf as it mangled his shoulder until both his body and his shoulder separates into two pieces "AHHH'' Subaru screams from the newly acquired sensation which was called pain after all being inside of purgatory makes it so you'll never feel pain while in there... Great isn't, but not so great if you get out after a couple of hundreds of thousands of years and only started to feel sensations not even a couple of minutes ago 'IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS' "AH GRAH AH GRAH AH GRAH'' Subaru screams out only to be met with another pair of fangs mowing down on his left calf "AH GRAH!" It doesn't take long for the other pack members to feast on Subaru's poor body as more and more fangs bite into him and take chunks of meat out of Subaru
At this point, Subaru has lost all coherent thoughts as he only screams out in pain and struggles to get out splashing his blood everywhere in the snowy ground alas if it wasn't bad enough Subaru's insides start to lose their heat to the surrounding cold. With Subaru squirming around Screaming for help and getting mauled to death and on top of that he's also freezing to death
It's no surprise that he dies rather quickly in one of the most disgustingly savagely ways possible 'n~no I~d~on't w~ant to~ di~' and those were the final thoughts of Natsuki Subaru before he died in the ruthless cold forest
[DON'T GIVE UP SUBARU YOU'RE OUR HOPE FOR THE FUTURE STAY DETERMINED] 'argh what th-' Subaru blink profusely at the sudden flash of light that enters his eyes 'W-What?' Subaru looks around in a state of shock initially thinking that he died only to be greeted by snow, trees, and the splotch of wet snow under his hand that quickly got covered by more snow 'w-what happened did I die? Why am I back here? What happened to the wolves? what was that voic-' Subaru internal questioning stop as the very familiar voice pop right back in his head [REMEMBER SUBARU NOTHING IS SET IN STONE] and in front of Subaru was a black box that in bold letters read [DEATH:1]
Hey author here, hope you like this first chapter and any criticism is welcome also as you can tell this is a Re:Zero x Undertale with a lot of OC also this is my first time writing... Well, anything like this so there is bound to be a lot of slip-ups anyways thanks for reading.