Love was not a logical emotion.
Attraction was not statistical. It could not be explained by science or mathematics. With affection, there were no data plots or binary codes or programming tricks to be whipped out of one's hat at any given moment. There was only mush and flitting hormones and absolute failure to communicate between the two fated individuals. It was not useful or productive or even slightly methodical.
Besides, who had time for love when you had video games to design and a highly persistent robot that needed your undying loyalty and attention twenty-four seven?
"Max? Max! Maaaaxxxx!" Markov cried out, zipping through the halls, a panicked emoticon displayed on his monitor. He darted past the chemistry lab and sped around the turn to the stairs sharply, narrowly dodging the perfectly painted fingernails that flew viciously through the air in the hopes of seizing him. "MAX! Someone! Help me! She's trying to rip out my processor!"
"I'M GOING TO PROCESS YOU WHEN I GET AHOLD OF YOU, YOU LITTLE CREEP!" Chloe Bourgeois screamed as she slid past the stairs and nearly smashed face-first into a wall.
At the sound of her abnormally furious tone (and let's be honest, over ninety-six percent of the time, the blond was furious about something) and her audacious threats against his robot, Max carefully lifted his wielding visor and cautiously peeked out of the mechanics' lab to see what all the commotion was about. The scene unfolding before him was hilarious, but Max needed a moment to take it all in, blinking and inhaling sharply as he watched Chloe try and fail to look dignified as Markov swept back around the banisters and cheekily glided past her to hide behind his creator.
"LET ME AT THAT MONSTER!"
And just like that, Chloe was bearing down on him, the intensity of her brimming temper enough to send any words of serenity-honestly, any words at all-fluttering from his head like Hawkmoth's cleansed akuma. Max cringed and nearly bent over backward to avoid what would most likely have been a painful collision, adjusting his glasses fearfully as he did so. Markov was hovering dangerously close to his neck which he suddenly feared the mayor's daughter might try and wring if he didn't splutter out something coherent soon.
"C-chloe!" he tried to protest. "W-what are you d-doing? What, ahhhh..." He gulped, gesturing behind his back for Markov to retreat inside the lab while he dealt with his very erratic classmate. "C-can I...help you?"
"Yes!" Chloe snapped, putting her hands on her hips and glaring down at him with a huff. "You can step aside and tell me where your pathetic excuse for a robot is hiding!"
"I didn't even do anything!" Markov's metallic voice protested from behind the teacher's desk. Max mentally face-palmed. So much for hiding. "I was simply implying that such patterns do not typically match in most fashion choices! I wasn't insulting you!"
"Oh, that--MOVE IT, KANTE, OR I'M TAKING YOU DOWN ALONG WITH YOUR LOUSY MACHINE!" She quickly shoved him aside and marched into the classroom. Max yelped and scrambled after her, throwing his arms wide, trying to shield Markov with his body.
"Now, hold on just a moment!" he tried to reason. "Why don't we all just calm down and talk about this? I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation if we could just-"
"Nope! No! No talking! Now, be a good boy and step aside," Chloe interjected, waving him off like some kind of peasant, looking mildly unimpressed as he dug in his heels and refused to budge. "Move away, Max!" the blond went on, growling, her expression resembling something close to murder.
"Chloe, he's my robot!" Max protested. "You can't just go around destroying other people's things!"
"I can when they insult me like that mongrel did!" Chloe spat back, pointing an accusing finger at the cowering machine. "Be grateful I'm not blaming you for its terrible fashion sense!"
Max dared a glance at his green shirt and suspenders and then back up nervously at Chloe. "B-but, Markov is partially machine!" he argued. "Naturally, he is going to state nothing besides the absolute facts! A-and..." He trailed off there, swallowing hard as Chloe's glare got-if it was even possible-even darker.
"'And', Kante?"
"And...I-I'm sure he was just...w-wrong?" Max coughed out, unconsciously trying to back further into the desk where he could cover Markov with his body and hide from the vicious stare from the girl three times his size.
"Hmmph! He'd better be, or I'll call my Daddy and have that heap of metal scrapped!"
Max balled his hands, watching angrily as the blond turned and stormed from the classroom, already screaming at someone on the gym floor for breathing too heavily. Max let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding, leaning against the desk to catch his breath as Markov, realizing the coast was clear, popped back into view, a grinning emoji flashing across his monitor.
"Thank you, Max! I needed my best friend to take down that woman! She's very easily annoyed, have you noticed?"
Max sighed again, fixing his glasses as he turned to face the robot with a frown. "Markov, you have got to be more careful!" he scolded, neglecting to answer the posed question for fear that "Queen Bee's" abnormally strong sense of her auditory cortex might be triggered by so much as thinking about her. "You shouldn't go around talking about Chloe like that!"
"But..." A question mark appeared on Markov's monitor. "I was simply stating that her leggings did not compliment the rest of her outfit. Did I say something wrong?"
Max groaned and banged his head on the side of the desk, regretting it almost instantly as lights burst before his eyes.
"I will take that as confirmation. Would you please explain it to me?"
The boy glanced up at his machine, wincing and rubbing his forehead, scolding himself for his actions as he did so. "It's...kind of hard to explain, Markov. You see, Chloe is-well, Chloe-and when one is speaking to Chloe, it is imperative that she feels...unthreatened. And...the way Chloe does that is through her sense of style so-"
"She began to feel threatened the moment I mentioned her clothes!" Markov realized, zipping around the room in a tizzy. "Oh, I'm sorry, Max! I didn't mean to insult her! I really didn't! Do you think she hates me? Of course, she hates me! What am I going to do?"
"Well, you could start by apologizing to her," Max suggested, though the very thought of it made him cringe. "But you might want to wait for a little while and let her cool off. Otherwise, she might smash you into a trillion microns."
"You're right!" Markov decided. "I will apologize!" He put on a brave emoticon and slowly moved toward the door. Max sighed, standing up woozily and coming over to open the door for him. He really needed to invest in some kind of hands for the robot, because this was beginning to get ridiculous.
"All right, but be care-"
Max's warning was cut off abruptly as the door flew open, smacking him right in the face and knocking him backward, the momentum from the impact pinwheeling his arms and sending him crashing into Adrien and Nino's desk where he lay, clutching his nose and uttering pained noises that could be by no means translated into French.
"Oh!" came a high-pitched gasp of shock. "Oh, oh no! I'm so, so sorry!" A blur of color whizzed past him and he felt someone kneel down to help him to his feet. Blinking through teary eyes, Max recognized the red-headed girl who sat three rows in front of him in class as she stepped back and wrung her hands nervously.
"Sabrina?" he mumbled as he stood unsteadily and felt Markov race over to make sure he was alright. "What are you doing here?"
"I...I was looking for Chloe!" Sabrina explained. Max nodded knowingly. Of course, she was. She was like Chloe's shadow. Wherever the blond went, Sabrina was never too far behind. It was kind of sad, really, to see how much the girl looked up to the bully-how she honestly believed Chloe was her best friend. "I'm so sorry!" she said again. "Here! Let me help you!"
"T-thank you," Max groaned, still holding his nose as Sabrina looked on, looking hopelessly guilty. "Ah...Chloe's gone," the boy went on, waving a hand from the room. "She ran off toward the gym somewhere."
Sabrina blinked, as though her mind were just now registering something. "Hey, you're Max, right?"
Startled that she actually remembered his name, Max nodded. "Max Kante," he said. "And you're Sabrina Raincomprix. You sit two rows in front of me in Ms. Bustier's class."
Sabrina blinked again. "You...know my name?"
"Uh...yes? I make it a point to learn every one of my classmate's names, personal interests, hobbies. You know," Max shrugged. "Typical classmate stuff."
Sabrina's eyes drifted to the floor. "No one's ever asked me about my personal interests before," she mumbled.
"Well...um..." Max scrambled, trying desperately to recall what he knew about the redhead. "You...you like soccer! Yeah! And...and arcades and...you really like the cafeteria food, though you don't want Chloe to see that and-"
Sabrina smiled weakly and his words died away as he found himself smiling shyly back. "You know all that about me?"
"Uh..." Max hesitated, glancing up at her, all logistics and mathematical equations vanishing from his brain. "Yes," he blurted before he knew what he was saying. "A-and I promise I'm not a stalker or anything!" he added hastily, holding up his hands as she continued to stare at him with wide eyes. "I j-just notice things, that's all!"
"Max!" Markov spoke up. "Your heart rate is increasing exponentially. This is a most unusual reaction. Perhaps you'd better sit down!"
Max glanced up at his best friend questioningly. "I feel fine, Markov. What are you talking about?"
"I should...really go and find Chloe now," Sabrina interrupted, seeming to snap back into focus. She stood back up and Max did the same. "I mean...if you're better, of course!"
Max nodded. "She stormed out of here approximately four minutes and eighteen seconds ago. At her current speed, she will reach her vehicle in about two minutes and three seconds. If you hurry, you might be able to catch her."
Sabrina stared. "You figured all of that out just by watching her leave?"
He shrugged, nodding sheepishly. It was what he did after all.
"That's so-oh, I really, really have to go now!" The redhead quickly grabbed her backpack and started to back away, still apologizing profusely. "I'll...I'll see you later! Bye!" And with that, the door closed behind her and she was gone.
"What was that all about?" Markov puzzled.
"I have no idea," Max admitted, shaking his head as he grabbed his wielding mask from the desk and situated himself to crawl back underneath his anti-gravity hoverboard, thoughts of the girl continuing to swim throughout his mind for the rest of the evening.
The next day found him in a similar predicament, only this time, he was not the center of it, merely an observer minding his own business, walking toward chess club. In fact, it was Markov who first noticed the commotion rising from the opposing end of the courtyard and Max had had half a mind to keep walking. There had been far too many akumatizations on the school grounds as of late and he really didn't want to be caught up in another. Besides, he was already late for practice.
"But, Max!" His robot had protested when he voiced his opinions, drawing an arched eyebrow from Kim who was solemnly walking nearby with Alix. "I've analyzed the voice in question! It's Sabrina!"
He didn't know what made him do it, but upon hearing those words, Max stopped and glanced over his shoulder. Seeing their friend pause, Alix and Kim did the same.
"What's wrong, Max?" Kim asked. "Did you forget something?"
"Like your brain?" Alix added with a knowing shrug.
Max ignored the both of them as he scanned the clearing for the source of the yelling voices. "You guys go on. I'll catch up with you later."
"Uh...okay?" Sharing a glance, the two continued on their way while Max hitched up his backpack and stormed toward the art lab, where the voices were becoming louder and clearer. Markov was right, he could definitely hear Sabrina's yelp of surprise. And the other voice...
"Ridiculous! Utterly ridiculous!"
Chloe. Right. Of course.
Max reached the door and hesitated, hearing the blond rampaging about something or another. Should I intrude? he wondered. Whatever was going on, it didn't involve him, and technically, it would be impolite to enter now.
"You should have had this finished yesterday, Sabrina!"
But then again, this didn't sound like a picnic. Max had no idea what Chloe could be so upset over, but whatever it was, certainly there was no excuse to be yelling. He reached for the knob once more, his mind made up, steeling himself for the full-blown hurricane that would undoubtedly come at him.
Before he could open the door, however, it flew open of its own accord and Sabrina came tumbling out, face drenched with tears, clinging desperately to a wad of books and papers Max could only assume was Chloe's homework. He quickly dove back to avoid being flattened as the redhead barreled past him and continued on down the hall, never stopping and never once looking over her shoulder.
Now, Max had half a mind to go and confront Chloe about her attitude. Whatever Sabrina had done (and it wasn't probably much, knowing how easily Chloe went off), she didn't deserve to be screamed at. But something stopped him. His mind immediately kicked into overdrive and he considered the likelihood of someone in Sabrina's state being the perfect target for Hawkmoth and it was far too high for his liking.
So, taking a deep breath, he turned and hurried after Sabrina.
It wasn't hard to figure out where she'd gone. It was the same place she always went whenever Chloe was being particularly mean-or raving about something "inexcusable" that Ladybug had done (usually about how she hadn't needed Queen Bee's help), a back secluded part of the Japanese themed gardens behind the school. It was typically empty by this point of the day, the art students having taken advantage of the sun's focus during lunch period, so it wasn't hard to find the girl sitting alone on an old swing near the bubbling stream, silently watching minnows splash and plunk in and out of the waves.
"What are you going to say to her?" Markov inquired as Max hesitated near the door, watching the girl desperately try and smooth out her wrinkled assignments.
"I'm not sure," Max confessed. "I've heard it's better to go with instinct when speaking to girls, right? At least that seems to work for Alix."
"For which she promptly beats you six feet into the ground afterwards," Markov reminded him.
Max grimaced. "Well, I don't have any better ideas, so this one will have to do. Stay here. I think I need to do this alone."
"Oh, but-"
Max quickly waved the robot off, moving carefully toward the devastated girl, stepping a bit like a mouse trying not to disturb a cat. She heard him coming before he'd gotten very far and she gasped, recoiling as he froze on the opposing side of the stream, tentative and unsure.
"Max?"
"Sabrina!" he said urgently. Maybe a little too urgently, he realized, as she winced. Swallowing back the crack in his voice, he tried again. "A-are you all right?"
"I'm...I'm fine, Max, thank you." She looked down at the homework and it was obvious that she was lying.
"Do you...ah...want to talk about it?" he offered, taking a step closer, relieved when she didn't immediately bolt.
"No," she sniffed.
All right, that does it. Time to be the bigger man. "Sabrina, whatever Chloe said to you isn't true."
She blinked, glancing up at him through watery eyes. "You...you heard?"
He nodded carefully. "Yes. And I want to assist! That is, if you'll allow me."
But she was already shaking her head. "Thank you, but no, that's okay. It's my fault really. I should have finished Chloe's homework a long time ago. She's right to be upset with me."
"Sabrina, you...know you don't have to do Chloe's homework for her, don't you?" Max explained desperately. "Chloe should be doing her own homework! And...and if she can't see that, then that's her fault, not yours!"
"But I have to do it!" Sabrina protested. "You don't understand! She's my best friend! And I'm a terrible friend to have let her down!"
Max frowned, unsure how to get his message through to the girl. She was smart, he knew it. So what did he have to do to convince her that helping Chloe-that cheating-wasn't the way? "Um...do you want help with these?" he asked, gesturing to the assignments. Maybe, if he couldn't convince her that she didn't need to help Chloe, that maybe she was smart enough to do things on her own.
She blinked. "Uh...no, thanks. I...I can do it." Wiping her tears away, she folded up her assignments and set them aside. "What...what are you doing here, anyway? I thought you were allergic to flowers."
"I...am," Max confessed, surprised. "How did you..."
"You hesitated before you entered the garden," Sabrina answered quietly. "Also, I can hear Markov running different scenarios for antidotes for pollen allergies from all the way over here. Hay fever, really?"
Heat rose in the boy's cheeks and he felt weak as he nodded slowly. "You could...hear him from way over here?"
She nodded, smiling shyly. "I also know why you came out here, despite your blatant allergy, and I appreciate it, really, but I'm okay. Chloe's just being...well..."
"Chloe," Max finished knowingly. "Sabrina, why do you hang around her anyway? Don't you realize how amazing you are? How much smarter you are than you give yourself credit for?"
"Well," the girl stammered. "I...I can't! Chloe doesn't have a lot of friends! And...and I can't take that away from her! It would...it would be wrong!"
It's wrong to continue on as though all of this is okay, Max thought rebelliously. But what could he say to her to convince her of this when she was so set on her own ways? Ways she had probably become used to over the years.
"I understand your loyalty to her," he admitted. "And it is very honorable. But..." He trailed off there, unsure how to continue.
Sabrina sighed. "I know. Believe me, I know. Marinette has been telling me the same thing for weeks. But I...I just can't! You wouldn't turn your back on...on Kim, would you?"
"Well, no, but..."
"It's the same for me and Chloe!" Sabrina explained. "If I turned my back on her now, how would I ever prove to her that friendship is a magical thing?" She held the homework closer to her chest.
Max stared at her, unable to fully comprehend what she was telling him, but understanding enough to know that this was one fight she was passionate about-one fight he wasn't going to win. "Well...all right...if you're one-hundred percent sure..."
She nodded quickly. "I am. Thank you, dor--I mean, Max." She reddened slightly and cringed back as though afraid he was about to get angry. It pained him to see her like that, but he gave her a gentle smile, reassuring her that everything was okay as she shifted over and made room for him to sit beside her.
"Any time, Sabrina. Any time."
Strobe lights flashed on him on every side. Uncomfortably, he tugged at his bowtie and blinked, raising a hand to block the glare and squinting through the ocean of bodies for any signs of his friends. Kim was on his way, if his hastily typed (and poorly misspelled) text meant anything. Alix was supposedly already there somewhere, having refused to a) let Kim escort her as her date and b) leave Max to third-wheel it all alone, though he was quite content to do just that.
His keenly adept gaze took in Adrien's party arriving in their typical dysfunctional manner; Marinette hiding behind Alya, the redhead practically dragging the baker's daughter along behind her, Adrien walking in the front, totally oblivious, as usual, and Nino...
Max trailed off there, frowning. Where was Nino anyway? Granted, the Moroccan hadn't shown up for any dances since the once forced upon him in the third grade, but this time, surely, it would be different! He had a girlfriend now. There was no way he wouldn't come!
And sure enough, there he came, sprinting through the front door in such a hurry that Max had to wonder how big the spider must have been to have caused such a freaked-out reaction. Max shook his head as the teen dove for cover underneath the buffet table and his friends had to coax him out.
What's up with him?
Never mind, the others would sort him out. Max had other things to attend to. Such as the timid redhead who had just stepped nervously through the door, using Chloe as a human shield. There she is, he noted, unsure why he couldn't tear his gaze away from her and why his heart rate was spiking.
"She looks astounding!" Markov chirped in his ear, causing the boy to jump and spin toward his robot complete with a little bowtie of his own, courtesy of Rose. "Uh...Max?" Markov went on when his creator remained silent. "Max, my friend, are you all right?"
"I...I think so," Max answered, his voice weak. "Markov, what's happening to me?"
"Isn't it obvious?" spoke another voice. Both boys spun to find Alix hovering creepily nearby, grinning almost as wickedly. "You like this girl! Go ask her to dance, for heaven's sake!"
Like? As in, like, like? As in, feel some kind of attraction to? Oh, no, no, no!
"Yes!" Markov agreed excitedly. "That would explain your sudden personality alterations! I think you should go ask her to dance, Max! Be brave!"
But, but I don't want to be brave! I want to go back to my lab! With my computers! Where it's safe!
"Come on, Max! It's time you stopped being Kim and I's third wheel!" Alix exclaimed. "Go tell Sabrina how you feel!"
"Uh...all right?" Max agreed, chuckling slightly. "I guess I could. If you really think it would help...?"
"We do," Alix and Markov said together.
Persistent. Noted. Laughing nervously, Max sidled away from the two and carefully inched his way toward the two girls. Chloe was the first to notice him and she wrinkled her nose as he approached, and Markov, who had darted after him, dove quickly for cover behind his back.
"Ugh. What do you want, Kante?" Chloe huffed, waving a dismissive hand and already starting to back away. "Here to share some more unwanted wisdom from your hunk of metal?"
"Actually, I'm here for Sabrina," Max admitted nervously, smiling shyly at the girl hiding behind her best friend anxiously.
"Say, WHAT?" Chloe exclaimed.
"Say, what?" Sabrina echoed more softly.
"Um, yes, I was wondering if Sabrina would like to...to dance?" Max went on, forcing his voice to be brave, praying they wouldn't notice the way his legs and hands were shaking.
"I would-"
"Uh, no! Sabrina would certainly not like to dance with you, dork!"
"Sorry, Chloe, but...I was actually asking Sabrina."
"Yes!" The girl blurted before the blond could interrupt again. She pushed her way past Chloe to take Max's hand, smiling hopefully up at him. "I would love to dance with you, Max."
Love to-she wants to dance with me! Oh my word, oh my word! I can't...she wants to dance with ME!
With a brain that was completely short-circuiting and a grin as wide as the Seine, Max led Sabrina onto the dancefloor. He didn't care about the glare Chloe was giving him or the shrieks of joy that Alya was (very unsuccessfully) trying to hide behind her hand. He didn't care what song was playing or the odd amount of action around him. All he could see was Sabrina's shy, but excited grin as the two of them swayed to the beat. And in that moment, it didn't matter what anyone else thought about them or his own insecurities. All he cared about was that Sabrina wasn't left alone on a night like this and that she had someone she could count on, a friend to lean on when she truly needed one.
And even if he did...have a tiny crush on Sabrina, was that really the worst thing that could have come out of all of it? Surely he could balance the equation. And if there was even a chance that she might like him back, he knew he had to take it. He'd started out just trying to convince Sabrina to do the right thing, but now it was something so much more. He could figure this out. He would.
After all, what he and Sabrina had a chance to have was more than fate. It was magical and yet, it was logical. Max realized in that moment that there was only one way to describe it.
It was statistically correct.