Summary:

Javier Escuella has been captured by John Marston on behalf of the US Government for his crimes. He was a revolutionary turned government dog just to survive but in the end it didn't make a difference. He has been a broken man ever since his family spilt apart at beaver hollow with no direction to go but down. If only he could see them one last time he would count himself blessed by Jesus Christ. When he blinks and sees God Damn Arthur Morgan riding next to him on top of a snowy mountain again he's not sure if he's been blessed or cursed.

Being hog-tied was not a comfortable experience. Hands behind your back so you had no balance which meant you couldn't catch yourself if you fell. Both feet tied together gave you the appearance of a landlocked mermaid with just as much grace as you'd expect. In Javier Escuella's opinion the worst was when your captor did not care about your comfort and thrown you around as a bag of hard potatoes. John Marston was currently handling Javier as if he was like said bag of potatoes on John's supposed farm. Javier never took John as the farming type, John didn't seem like he could stay in one place long enough to farm. But he was different, they all were now.

Javier was a little heavier now, gone was his immaculate appearance in both clothes and grooming. He didn't really see a point to it now with no one he cared about around anymore. Just a hired gun for a regime he fought against in his youth. For what? Survival? Look at where that got him. He wondered where it all went wrong, if it was something he did, or failed to do, that caused the destruction of the Van der Linde gang. He thought about it a lot while on the run to Mexico but could only settle on that it was because of John's and Arthur's betrayal. That was a lie but an easy one. Javier knew things with the gang started showing rot back with that bad business in Blackwater when Dutch killed Heidi McCourt. He could never forget that name, as hard as he tried to. He made excuses for Dutch and himself for what happened, tried to stay loyal with all that he had, but it wasn't until he started working for Allende puto that he realized something. His blind loyalty, in which he committed numerous crimes against both his fellow man and God, he was no different then the men who castrated and fed his father to pigs.

Micah Bell, that was a man who you didn't need any convincing to know was bad news. Blackwater was Micah's idea, he killed Ms. Grimshaw, and if Arthur was telling the truth Micah had been a rat since they escaped Guarma. Micah had sworn that Arthur was a dying liar trying to take the gang down with him. They spilt not long afterwards, with Dutch saying that was their best chance for survival and they would reunite when the heat died down. He kept some correspondence with Dutch using aliases, he had a plan involving going to Columbia but was scant with the details as usual. Dutch didn't have plans, maybe he never did, all he had were whims and pretty words. Word was that Dutch shot Micah but he wouldn't talk about it in his letters. Not that Javier needed proof, Dutch hadn't even mentioned Micah in four years.

He looked back to John from the back of the horse, knowing that Marston had enough experience with this sort of business to not give Javier a way to escape. That didn't mean that Javier would make it easy for him. While testing the binds, he decided it would be best to try and distract John all the while. If he happened to get some answers to questions that had been burning in his soul for 12 years then so be it.

"How's it feel?"

"How's what feel?" John parroted back, discomfort and annoyance tinged in his voice.

"Finishing what you and Arthur started, destroying the family. You already got me so I imagine that you are going after Bill next, then Dutch. When does it end? Are you going after Swanson too? Tilly? Pearson? You must know that they'll keep using you untill they can't get anything else. When you can't be their hunting dog they'll just put you down." Javier couldn't help but sneer, not that John was looking at him.

"You, Bill, and Dutch that's all the Bureau wants and my family will be released, that was the deal, everyone else wasn't 'important' enough when I asked that question myself. Maybe you're right and they'll never let me go but I'll do anything to keep Abigail and Jack safe. And for your information Arthur and I were trying to keep the gang together until that mess in Saint Denis. Without Hosea our family was as good as gone." John's last words were quiet, barely loud enough for Javier to hear

Javier was quiet for a long while. His family had been on the decline since Blackwater but Hosea's death shook them the hardest. Dutch may had been something like a surrogate father and mentor but Hosea Matthews had paternal wisdom written in every every action and expression. Whether it was a proud smile after Javier caught his first fish or a light smack of the head when he was caught stealing some bacon off of Hosea's plate. Dutch was the Leader but Hosea was the Soul. What John was saying made sense from what Javier remembered of him. John's expression was still pensive and Javier understood that he knew that they would probably betray him or never give him back his wife and child but that was his only option, his only chance for redemption. Javier could respect that, even if he was an unwilling sacrifice for this "redemption".

"Micah was the rat, wasn't he?" Javier knew the answer but needed to be sure.

All he was a nod and grunt in response, John's face never changed.

"Arthur said that Micah betrayed us after Guarma but then how'd they keep finding us before all that? We had too much go wrong for him to be the only reason, there had to something else."

John decided that deserved more than grunts, "I been thinking about that myself, far as I can tell we weren't as hidden as we thought. Think about it, we weren't exactly being subtle. Already on the run, we shot up four different towns and robbed banks and trains. Those were some real bad calls that could've led a blind man to us. Maybe Micah was a snake ever since we picked him up, doesn't matter. My question is why'd Dutch think that was a good idea to keep trying to get involved in anything that smelled of money, especially after the Braithwaite and Gray mess."

"But we needed money to leave the country, how else we're we supposed to get it fast enough before they would find us?"

"Did you know I found the chest that had the money we collected over the years for the camp about 4 years ago?"

"So you are a thief. And what does you being a thief have to do with anything?" Javier couldn't help the small sneer in his voice.

"I ain't nothing. Well I am a lot of things but I did not steal that money. Now shut up and I'll tell you. Sadie had been working as a bounty hunter after Beaver Hollow and occasionally hired me as an extra gun so I could pay off the farm I bought. After awhile she found out where Micah was, he formed his own gang and was hiding up in the mountains with them. He killed Arthur, Javier, in cold blood. Charles saw it and told me after I found him in Saint Denis years later. We couldn't let him get away with it and even if we left him alone it would only be a matter of time before he found us and try to burn the farm to the ground. Probably would kill me after making me watch as he did God knows what to my family."

Javier could imagine it, "He always was a vindictive bastard."

John continued, "So me, Sadie, and Charles decided we needed to go right then, catch him unawares. Charles gets shot on the way up the mountain so I go up there with Sadie to finish it. Micah eventually grabs Sadie and tries to get away when Dutch of all people walks out a cabin. I can't remember all that was said but when I thought I was gonna have to shoot them both Dutch shoots Micah dead center in the gut. Micah goes for his guns so I put him down. Before I can even try to thank him, Dutch just walks away without a word. Sadie tells me that the money should be close and I find it soon enough. Do you know how much was in there?"

Javier was about to answer but John didn't give him the chance.

"About 40,000 dollars in bills, gold, and jewels. Forty God damn thousand dollars. There weren't any news on either Micah or Dutch making big scores in the four years since we last saw them. Most of that money had to be from when we were running together. All that money and we kept going for more. If Dutch really wanted to we could have left anytime. Maybe wherever we ended up we wouldn't be able to retire but we could start a good life with that money, an honest one. I think Dutch was afraid of it."

"Afraid of settling down?" Javier asked slightly incredulous.

"Afraid of giving up the adventure. It's all he knew, moving from one place to another and stealing from folk. That life made sense. It took me a while to learn how to give it up but once I did I never regretted it."

"Yet here you are."

"Yeah, here I am. All that tells me is you can't run from your past. Can't hide from it neither, not really. Maybe for a little while, sure, you can want to change and you might even do it but that doesn't mean you aren't also the man you used to be either."

"Never took you for a philosopher John." Javier snarked, though without much venom.

"Turns out ranch work gives you plenty of time for reflection." John replied offhandedly.

Giving one last tug, Javier knew he wouldn't be getting out his binding without John noticing. He could try and jump from the horse but would at best be a very painful delay or a quick way to break his neck at worst.

"Where are you supposed to meet these agents anyways?"

"Just north of the river, U.S. soil and all that 'jurisdiction' business. Should only take an hour or two."

Javier relaxes, there's no way out of this. Might as well try and leave this world with as much dignity as he could muster.

"Have you seen the rest? Any of them still alive?" Javier asked.

"Well most of the folk that didn't die back then are still kicking last I heard. Charles and Sadie left with half the money soon after getting back to the ranch, tried to give them more but they wouldn't have it. Both went north and haven't seen them since. Uncle is his usual useless self, drinking and sleeping at my ranch as we speak I bet."

John then explained about Pearson's store, Tilly's husband and child in Saint Denis, Reverend Swanson's congregation up north, and even Mary Beth's success as a novelist. Javier actually knew about Mary Beth, he was a fan of her work though he wouldn't admit, wasn't Macho. He kept talking, only pausing when Javier had other questions. John then went on to talk about Abigail and Jack, telling stories and jokes about them and life on the ranch. Javier was surprised he was enjoying himself, even laughing, but he relished it. By God he missed this, it was like they were still familia, maybe they were even after all that happened. That last hour was the best hour he had in 12 years.

All good things must ended, and often way sooner than you'd like in Javier's experience. Once they passed the bridge Javier could see two men and what he could only guess was to be a motor vehicle he heard rumors about.

"This is it," was all John said.