-Michael heard a shrill shriek as he was struck by a searing bright light. In that white hot second he could feel himself begin to fall, but he never actually felt himself finish hitting the ground. Instead, he seemed to continue on into a dark spiraling free-fall, neither gaining speed nor slowing, just falling deeper and deeper. As he fell, he began to see flat shapes swirl past him in the darkness. The shapes fell like multicolored flickering ticker tape: some shapes were fuzzy and drifted far away from him while the others that floated right in front of his face were as crisp as a new polaroid. Looking at some of the ones closest to him, he began to understand exactly what they were. It was as if he'd tripped down a flight of stairs holding an open box of family photos: spiraling all around him were different personal memories!
They appeared to be random at first, a hand picked hodge-podge from every important moment that had happened in the last few years. However, one of the closest ones to him didn't follow this trend; instead, it looked fuzzy and half forgotten: it was a memory from his childhood in Greece. He nostalgically reached out for it, and upon grasping it, immediately pulled it closer to him. Holding it reminded him strongly of home and of his mother. Suddenly he felt almost three years old again: he was with his mother on a day trip to the farmer's market. He could almost feel his tiny hand holding her's ... only for the rest of the memory to suddenly sputter out of his grasp. Before it was completely gone, though, he could just make out the faint end of the memory: their trip had been cut short abruptly for some reason. He tried to remember why that might have happened, but just like the rest of the memory, it was beyond his grasp now.
The next memory within reach was from an afternoon in Second year, when he was seven. Thankfully this memory was a bit more defined than the last one: In it he was walking home from school. He could feel the underlying waves of tension and sadness from that moment again. He remembered dreading having to walk this way every day because of how exposed and lonely it felt. He just knew something bad was going to hap- *Oof* - how'd he get down here, had he been tripped? Suddenly there were people all around him... a posse of older boys had him surrounded… T-they started hitting him… they weren't going to let up- Michael's grip on the memory loosened a bit on instinct, pulling him out of the moment. He was sitting there shaking, ready to let go of the memory fully, until he saw something important coming into frame. Re-adjusting his grip, he voluntarily fell back into that awful moment only to find that- surprisingly- he wasn't alone any more. Someone was there, helping him up after the bullies had left: it was Emil! Tearfully, he let the memory slip away… he felt rather remorseful, as he wondered how he could've forgotten their first meeting…
To take his mind off this, he grabbed another random memory from the ones floating next to him. Now he was in a doctor's office, he was definitely eight years old during this one, he could tell by the calendar that read '1984'. He didn't feel hurt or anything, he actually felt kind of bored and slightly jittery instead… He looked over at his mother; she looked right back at him, or was it through him? She actually looked the way he thought he should be feeling right now: pale, nervous, and highly concerned. He wasn't sure why he thought her reaction was the proper response; he just figured that most people didn't react to a broken leg with nonchalance. Hmm, he needed a distraction… so he started up a conversation with the nice elderly man across from him. Something he'd said made the older gentleman smile… the man asked him if this was his first experience with shellsh- Michael quickly let that one go too. He quickly decided that he needed a breather from his surprisingly depressing early childhood.
This time, he tried to angle himself over towards a particular memory a good bit further away from the last two. It was just out of - got it! This time it was just him and Emil, hanging out and talking about their respective plans for the future. They were only 14 and 15 years old respectively, which meant they'd be starting their first year of Lyceum next year. Emil said that he was thinking about just enrolling at a General courses type Lyceum, you know with money being tight and all… Michael understood, but personally he thought his friend could do better. When Emil asked him about his future goals he confidently told him about his plans. He was practically burning with passion while he talked about the exclusive Experimental-Science Lyceum he was going to go to. After all, he would need to learn from the best if he was going to be a great doctor someday... Emil laughed at his boldness and then asked him a rather piercing question: Are you sure you actually want to be a doctor, you didn't just decide that because of your d- Michael let the memory go in shock, he didn't remember that one ending like that... Maybe he'd forgotten that part on purpose?
Actually, upon further inspection, most of the memories he had witnessed so far had been traumatic and possibly repressed. All of a sudden, he wasn't sure if he wanted to look at these memories anymore. In fact he desperately felt the need to get away from them, but curiously, they appeared to be everywhere now. It was as if someone had flipped a switch and the memories around him went from floating aimlessly to suddenly converging on Michael. Soon all the memories in sight had flocked to him, swarming around him begging to be touched. He tried to stay as far away from them as possible, but soon he found it difficult to to avoid them completely as they began to close in tighter. It came to the point where he didn't even need to touch them for the memories to play:
He was so excited all of a sudden, it was because his letter had finally come! He ripped open the envelope, it was marked: Empire State University; United states of America; New York city, New York. His mother was there too, also excited and waiting with baited breath in the background. This was it! He had it out now and he was almost scared to read it… his hands shook almost uncontrollably while he tried to decipher the suddenly alien text. Back and forth, back and forth his eyes shot across the page as they searched for the most important phrase in the English language: 'you are Accepted'. He scanned and scanned and… shoot, almost missed it… oh boy, it said… it said… he nearly broke down in tears and his mother had to ask him what was wrong. He told her the news: he got in! She gasped and then pulled him into a light bone crushing hug, She couldn't stop crying and telling him how proud she was of him. Personally he'd also never felt-
Sadder in his entire life! O-one minute they had everything in front of them… and the next? Y-you know, it wasn't supposed to be this way… in no sane universe should Emil have died before he did! His friend had the most potential he'd ever seen, he could have gone on to do anything and he would have been great at it… No! That tombstone had no business reading: 'Here Lies Emil Nikos, b.1976- d.1993'. It should have been him laying cold in the ground. It should have been him! He was the one who should be dead right now, not Emil! He was the one living on borrowed time, the one destined to die young… He, He, oh! W-what was he supposed to do now without Emil in his life? He didn't want to think too hard about the future right now, there was too much to think about right now anyways. Geeze, what wouldn't he give for a distraction right about-
He would never look at another girl so long as he lived! Not a single girl in this lecture hall, or even the entire world, could make him look away from her. As far as he was concerned right now, his heart beat only for the blonde girl three rows ahead of him and her alone. As soon as Theoretical Biotech was over he swore he would try and talk to her. He figured he'd introduce himself, ask for her name, make a nice impression, maybe get her phone number? He didn't know how american girls felt about romance, so he figured it would be best to start slow... ugh, speaking of slow, could this class go any fas- *SCReech SCrEech ScrEECH… SCReech ScrEech ScrEECH* The sound of the fire alarms sent everyone into a panic, cutting their class short as a result. While his class rushed to evacuate, Michael realised now was his best chance to talk to the girl from three rows ahead. Quickly, he packed up his things and adjusted his crutches so he could catch up to her. Never had he ever moved with more purpose than he did now. Sadly, when he finally got there, he saw his window of opportunity swiftly closing… She was already talking to some nerdy dweeb. Desperate to make contact, he tried to suavely insert himself into their conversation… She looked unamused. Her and her boyfriend 'Peter' decided to go elsewhere to continue their talk away from 'further interruptions'. Boy had he screwed up… if only he could have another chance with her-
It was dark and busy on the way home to his dorm building. Out of nowhere he heard a scream and was nearly body-checked into the street by some dick moving against traffic. Thankfully, in his moment of surprise, one of his askew crutches caught his assailant's foot and caused them to trip and drop something… It was a lady's clutch. The thief wasted no time in trying to get back up, but unfortunately for them, Michael had other ideas. Before the thief could react, Michael 'collapsed' onto them: pinning them and the stolen purse to the ground. They had run into him, after all… aww geez, and the whole side walk had seen it happen… oh boy, was that campus security too? Michael managed to flag the security officer over just in time for the owner of the clutch to show up. Much to his surprise, it was the girl from his Biotech class-
He had ten minutes until Felicia arrived and he spent every second of it trying to get ready. He shuffled papers, stacked books, wiped up stains, brought out the second rolly-chair, fidgeted with the plasticware, and even ended up checking his hair three times in the mirror before he heard her coming up the stairs. Quickly, he flipped off the overhead lights and rolled over to open up the blinds and let in the light of the sunset. Checking one last time that everything looked perfect, he made his way over to the trap door to let her in. Michael opened the trap door just as his date was about to, surprising her in the process and almost making Felicia lose her grip. Quickly he offered her a hand up, which she gracefully took as she scolded him for scaring her like that. He knew she didn't really mean it, and while he helped her inside he decided to tease her for jumping a foot into the air. Well, she replied, it wasn't everyday that someone invited her on a date in their 'Top Secret' lair, so excuse her for being jumpy! He just nervously laughed at her grumpiness and tried not to 'too obviously' watch her inspect the place. He followed her gaze as it slid right over the laid out table and his various science equipment in the background, and instead came to a stop on the ceiling. At first, she stood there squinting for a minute before an 'oh shit' look suddenly formed on her face. Michael, she said nervously, are you aware that your ceiling has- what? Bats? He finished. She looked at him with wide eyes and nodded. He chuckled and asked her how else was he supposed to study them? Besides, he reassured her, they were only harmless brown bats-
Michael felt so exhausted that If he continued to stare into his microscope, even for one more minute, he might end up falling out of his rolly-chair. He had been up in the bell tower lab since he left his final class four hours ago. He'd been working hard on his pet projects, and occasionally focusing on today's homework, since then. It wasn't until now, though, that the time had really caught up to him and he began to feel the effects of the school day. In all honesty, he knew it was time to go home for the night: all the bats had left, he was starting to get hungry, and he was way too tired to stay up here much longer. If he started now, Michael thought, he might even be able to squeeze into the dining hall before it closed. Plus, if that worked out, he might still be able to get in a shower before it hit midnight. But that was only if he left right now... and he still had to pack up all his work and stuff for the night. Looking around, he guess-timated that it would take close to twenty minutes to clean everything up by himself… Ugh, why did he to pull so much stuff out while he was working alone-
The first time he heard the news, he just couldn't accept it. It wasn't until the email from the school showed up that it really hit him: He really wasn't going to be able to go home for spring break! The travel ban had quickly extended to the whole EU, including Greece… He was going to be stuck at school for two weeks at least… and most likely alone too, because everyone else he knew: his roommate John, his favorite professor , his lab partner Parker, even Felicia lived here in New york. They didn't have to worry about air travel to make it home: but he does! It was so bad that he couldn't even get a cabbie to drive towards the airport. With things the way they are he was starting to worry about his mother: Had she heard the news? Did she know he wouldn't be coming? Would she be worried about him? And even if she did already know about the ban, was she aware of the virus causing it? Would she even be safe alone by herself, during this? The strand going around was supposed to be extra nasty and contagious… His mom was only 40-something years old and in pretty good shape. She'd be ok even if she caught it, right? Plus, the EU was already working on a vaccine… it would only take them… err, two months? Three? It couldn't possibly be that much longer than that, right?-
Why was this so hard! What could possibly be so frustratingly difficult about this? He was at the top of his bio-chemistry class! He knew the theory inside and out! He studied bats in his spare time, for crying out loud! Why was finding a vaccine for this so hard? Michael was so frustrated that he almost threw his microscope out the lab window. He'd been working on this for hours now, with nothing to show for it. Of course not that that really matters... Because nothing matters anymore, does it? Nothing ever has. Especially not since he has all the time in the world now due to the extended travel ban! All he ever did nowadays was work on this stupid thing... and he was starting to getting sick of it! He was definitely getting nowhere like this… maybe he needed a change of scenery? He decided to pack up his stuff and try again at the clock tower lab instead.
He grabbed his notes and stuffed them into his bag, turned off the classroom light as he left, and hobbled his way out of the building. He made it halfway to the clock tower before the misting started. It wasn't hard enough yet to merit any concern on his part, so he just continued on his way to the tower and didn't think much of it. It wasn't until he was all the way in his lab and fully set up that he looked out the window and noticed that the entire bottom had fallen out. There were whole curtains of rain coming down outside of his window and he could hear thunder as loud as an avalanche! It was so wet and miserable outside that, when he looked up and saw a sea of eyes staring back at him, he wasn't entirely surprised… Tonight would be a horrible night for anyone to go out, even bats.
He figured that he was lucky to have barely missed it, and very quickly got reabsorbed and totally lost in his work. Soon he was so blissfully up to his eyeballs in blood samples and notes that he had tuned out the storm completely. All that mattered for Michael was the desperate hunt for a vaccine and nothing else. If he had been offered an airplane ticket home right then, he wouldn't have even batted an eyelash. He was so hyper-focused on the process that time began to slide right past him at breakneck speed. He didn't notice the shortening gaps between thunderclaps or the stressed out bats flying around the room. He also hadn't even considered the dangers of working in the tallest building on campus during a spring thunderstorm… yep, nothing going on in his head but Pure Science! But honestly, could you blame him? Very suddenly he was making whole leaps and bounds of progress on something he'd been stuck for weeks on! Michael could practically taste how close he was to a working prototype… if he kept up this pace he might have something working by tomorrow morning! Why, he felt so confident in his progress that he even considered a stretch break might be in order. It was right then, as he rolled his chair away from the desk, that worst finally happened: Something fuzzy flew right at his face as he suddenly got a whiff of ozone-
Finally, the memories ended and the sensation of falling came to a halt. Michael opened his eyes, not realizing that they'd been close up until then, and was surprised by what he saw. He was expecting to look around at his lab, blink the after image of the bolt out his eyes, and get back to work. Instead he found himself lying in the completely opposite environment: he found himself lying on the shore of a dark, rocky, subterranean beach! In front of him, where his desk full of notes had been, was now a murky looking river that stretched further than he could possibly see. It was full of things like garbage, lost mementos, and dead things that looked like they might reach out of the surface and grab him… In fact, just looking at the dirty roiling surf left a knot in Michael's stomach. He needed to look at something, anything else, than the gross dark water. Without really noticing it, he found himself scanning up and down the beach looking for something to take his mind off it.
He found his reprieve in the form of a rickety looking wooden dock jutting out into the water. Somehow he felt drawn to the decrepit old thing. He didn't consciously will himself to walk toward it, his feet just decided on their own that that was where he needed to be. Soon he was at the threshold of the dock, right where it left the arid rocky soil and began extending over the deathly looking water. He wasn't sure if he wanted to cross this boundary, it felt like if he did so then the decision would be permanent. He stood there for who-knows-how-long before he finally dared himself to cross. As soon as he set foot on the dock proper, there was a boat somehow docked at it! He hadn't seen it come from anywhere, it was just suddenly there… and it wasn't empty either. There was a strange man who wore an expensive designer suit and tortoise shell glasses standing at the tiller. If Michael had seen this guy anywhere else he felt like he probably would have just looked right through him or past him. But right there, at the tiller on this dinky little boat in the river, he couldn't look away from him. It was such an eerie and odd feeling that he didn't immediately notice that the man was gesturing for him to hurry up.
When he did, though, Michael felt hesitant to move. Just like at the dock boundary, there was a sense of permanence and finality about whether or not he responded. He spent a small eternity debating whether or not to get on the boat. In the end, he found himself on it anyway regardless. The man at the till gestured at him for something, but Michael wasn't entirely sure what it was he wanted. He kind of just stood there staring at the man until it finally dawned on him! Michael began scrounging around in his pants pockets, looking for any loose change he might have… it looked like he wasn't going to find any… but then he checked the pockets of his lab coat. Inside the dark pockets of his dingy black lab coat he managed to find three U.S. coins: one dime and two shiny pennies! He didn't exactly know why, but he felt so relieved when he fished them out and gave them to the Ferryman. The Ferryman looked unhappy with the offered coinage at first, but when no more seemed to be forthcoming, he ended up just rolling his eyes in acceptance instead. He didn't say anything, but Michael took that as a command to find a seat somewhere fast. Once he was settled, the boat silently left the dock. It ended up being a surprisingly smooth ride and he soon found himself lost in thought.
At first, he wondered if this might be a dream or something; it wouldn't be the first time he'd fallen asleep at his desk in the tower. Eh, but that wouldn't explain the memory montage or how scarily real this all felt right now… In the end, he decided that he didn't need to pinch himself to prove the solidity of the boat under him or the frightening waters around him. Of course, if this was all real then… Did that mean he was…? *da-DUNk* He almost jumped out of the boat when he felt it come to a sudden halt. He didn't move for a moment, just in case this wasn't his stop… For a while the boat sat there, gently butting up against the new dock. After a moment where nothing happened, he decided it was his time to go and he very awkwardly exited the boat. On the dock now, he found himself faced with a nearly identical beach to the last one that mirrored the opposite bank in almost every way. The only noticeable difference from the other shore was a light dirt path going away from this beach and out across a large grey field. He wasn't sure, but maybe he was supposed to follow it? He turned around to try and ask the Ferryman if that was correct, but he and the boat had somehow already left. Michael didn't know why, but the sudden absence of the strange craft left him subtly worried and almost panicky. He tried to look up and down the coast for the boat, but he was suddenly cut short by a terrific sound. Behind him, Michael heard three very deep and perfectly in sync growls; the sound of which made him suddenly very reluctant to turn around…
He wanted to stand there and try his best to ignore the very deep Barking that followed, but he knew that he couldn't ignore the source as soon as it started barreling towards him. He had to consciously force himself to turn around and face the oncoming beast before whatever it was got him! What he found charging across the dead looking fields sent a chill up his spine: coming straight at him was a three-headed, semi-translucent, rottweiler the size of a house, that also somehow had a snake for a tail! It had to be the largest and angriest looking dog that he had ever seen; not to mention the fact that it looked at him like he was a human-sized Gyro platter… Despite this, Michael couldn't pull himself or his eyes away from the ravenous animal's path. He was trapped there, paralyzed on the spot, as it got closer and closer to him and the river bank.
The dog let out another deafening triple-bark and leapt for him! As it reached its apex time began to stretch for Michael. Suddenly all he could do was stare deeply into the collective maws of the dog in an horrified, slow motion trance. As the huge beast came crashing down, Michael tried his best to move or get away but he was only able to get a hair's breadth out of the way before the monster was on top of him. In a blink, its dreadful moist breath washed over him as the beast's middle head snapped him up! He screamed as the dog's mouth clamped down on him and he waited with bated breath for the terrible cracking noises that would surely follow. However, just when he realised that his ribs hadn't been snapped like dry kindling, he passed out from shock. The head that held him felt just as confused as he'd been; it began to whimper in confusion, causing the head next to it to come investigate. The left head tried to sniff him, but the middle head didn't want to share him and tried to move out of the way. Meanwhile the third head didn't seem all that interested in the middle head's prize at all. It was too busy looking around to care what the other two were doing.
It had a job to do, and even if the other two were too busy to participate, at least it was going to stay on- OOoH LOOK, A BAT! The right head thought as it swerved to find the small ghostly creature that it was suddenly enamored with. Distracted, the head promptly forgot its guard duties so that it could follow the frail creature. Because the other two heads were busy, it had the full range of their shared body, which it immediately used to chase after the small white creature. This led to the big dog sprinting down the path with Michael unwittingly along for the ride. The whole dog continued running until it had chased the bat farther into the interior of the vast grey field and had managed to come to a trickle of people on the path. The panicking bat tried flying away from the large dog by going over the growing crowd. The dog either didn't care or notice the crowd because it didn't stop there or try to go around. Instead it just decided to barrel through them and scatter the people in its wake like bowling pins!
The fact that its pursuer was still there sent the frightened bat onwards and over a large wrought iron gate. The dog, still knocking people over and still hanging onto Michael, tried to follow it over the gate too but could not due to the sheer height of the gate! Upset, the monstrous dog tried to go over the gate to follow the bat, but couldn't jump high enough to make it. Since that didn't work, the dog decided to stand up against the gate and start banging its paws against it in an attempt to knock it over. This didn't work either and only served to make the dog even angrier as it watched the bat fly further and further away… Eventually, the dog realized that the bat had gotten away. The left head whined in frustration, the right head decided to continue barking at the bat, and the middle didn't care all that much: at least he still had his prize!
Meanwhile, in the wake of the dog's rampage, millions of dead people had been haphazardly shuffled like a large deck of cards. Some had been thrown ahead of their previous spots in the line, while others were flung so far away that it would take decades for them to reach their original spots. The amount of chaos was enough to bring the attention of a Very, VERY large man in very dark robes to the gate. The man took one look at the mess his dog had made and decided to bring it inside to prevent further chaos from ensuing. "Get in here, NOW, boy!" he yelled at the giant translucent beast, causing the guilty monster to quickly slink inside the giant iron door. A few enterprising souls tried to come in with the dog, but got crushed in the door as the beast's master closed it. Once the large dog was fully inside the giant let him have it, "How many times do I have to tell you, Cerberus, that you can not play at the front gate!? You aren't a puppy anymore, young man, that tail of yours can take out a whole Hekatonkheire in one swing! Just Imagine what you're doing to my line? You're setting me back a whole hundred years is what! Do you understand me mister?".
Cerberus did understand, and he felt rather sorry for what he'd done, but he just couldn't help himself. To show his remorse, he gave the giant three pairs of very exceptional puppy eyes and two thirds of a very sincere whine. The giant was moved by this, because what dog owner can stay angry with their pet for that long? To show that he accepted Cerberus' apology, his giant master gave each head a gentle pat and ear scritch. Both the right and left heads almost lost it upon receiving such pleasures; the right's eyes in particular almost rolled all the way back inside its head and the left lost control of its licker. The middle, on the other hand, was very subdued in its reaction. The giant found this curious, usually the middle was very vocal when happy… that was when he noticed that the head had a mouthful of something. "What do you have sweet-boy?" he asked, frowning a bit as he tried to gently get the head to release its prize. The middle head was reluctant at first but eventually, with enough sweet talk from the giant, it let go.
Gasping for air, Michael fell roughly two stories to the ground from the beast's mouth and somehow managed to not die! Of course, since he'd been suffocating inside a dog's mouth and had just fallen two stories, he did not move much for a while after that. Intrigued and a bit perplexed, the giant disdainfully picked Michael up and out of the large puddle of saliva to inspect him. Now at eye-level, the giant saw that he had picked up a very scrawny and not-quite-dead-looking dark haired youth. Frowning, the giant absentmindedly told Cerberus thank you and sent the large dog along on his merry way. He took Michael with him further inside the area behind the gate. If Michael hadn't been passed out, he would have seen an amazing garden of jewels, phosphorus plants, and pomegranate trees go past them. Even further inside the gates, He would have seen a truly enormous dog house that could only belong to Cerberus. But even that monumental piece of canine realestate paled in comparison to their final destination.
They stopped at a ginormous building somewhere between a palace and temple made entirely of jet black marble and well polished bronze. There were skeletal guards at its gate but they did not attempt to bar the giant from entering. Inside was almost a maze of large beautifully decorated rooms, but the giant did not get lost or stop to gawk. Instead he kept going until he reached what could only be a throne room. It was immense in every sense of the word and at its center sat a vacant throne. When they had reached a respectable distance from it, the giant set Michael down gently in front of it. Then, the giant continued on to the throne and sat down in it! He took a minute to get comfy, and in that time Michael finally came to his senses.
His eyes shot open and, much like a small bat that had accidentally flown into someone's house, he froze on the spot in fear. He stayed exactly where the giant had set him while he took the room in: It was so big that it was cavernous, the floors and all the pillars were made of beautiful veiny black marble trimmed in shining bronze, and there were large smokey brazzers everywhere to provide light and heat. Michael was equally impressed and awed by the level of detail present in the room, in all honesty it put many of his old history books to shame! The most impressive feature of the room, by far, was not the furniture however. The main subject of Michael's awe and fading terror was the Giant and his throne. The giant, besides being very large, was also someone who clearly radiated authorial power and might. Something about the way he sat or dressed just made Michael want to fall down at his feet and not move or speak ever again. The giant was actually very scary when he thought about it… of course, it didn't help that his throne was actually made of terrified looking human skeletons and his robes looked like they were sewn from the very inky depths of space.
While Michael was busy observing the Giant, the Giant was also leisurely assessing him. Beyond the deathly pallor that comes from just being near death, this youth was very pale, he thought. The Giant noticed that the young man's legs were crooked and slightly stunted for some reason... could they possibly be why he had yet to stand? Also, although he was far from one to judge, the giant found the youth to be rather homely… he suspected it was mostly because of his very squashed nose… but that's none of his business. What was his concern, however, was the fact that the young man seemed to be teetering right on the point between life and death! It was a very rare case, one not seen very often let alone encountered on his very front doorstep. Before he did anything about it, the Giant would need a bit more information from the subject in question. To get his attention, the Giant softly cleared his throat.
Michael jumped at the sound, immediately clearing away all the observations he'd been making and quickly pulling himself together. Amazingly he even slowly managed to stand; something he normally needed his crutches for, but seemed capable of doing quite easily here. Umm, speaking of, where was here? He'd only just noticed how out of place he felt… He needed more information, but the only person here was the Giant… Should he ask him? Just as he was about to do that, the Giant asked Michael a question of his own:
"Who are you, Mortal, that you stand here in my hall neither dead nor alive?"
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