[Written for Twelve Shots of Summer: Another D8.]
Hajime was running out of time to make a decision.
He knew that the Steering Committee would only wait so long before they gave up on him and found a different candidate for the project. The fact that he had even taken this long seemed surprising to them, and he could understand why. After all, he was completely talentless and ordinary, and here they were giving him an opportunity to be so much more. The obvious choice would be to agree to the project. After all, he didn't really have a whole lot going for him at the moment. He wasn't sure how much longer he could afford to keep attending Hope's Peak, since the Reserve course fees were so expensive. If he wasn't here anymore, then what was the point to anything?
Still, the idea of them messing around with his brain was pretty terrifying. He wasn't sure if he would still really be himself at the end of all of this. Was it worth it to have talent if he wasn't able to appreciate it? There was so much that Hajime still didn't truly understand about how this would work.
Maybe it would be better to remain as he was. Sure, he would hate himself, but at least he would still be him. His life wasn't completely terrible, since he had two really good things. He had his boyfriend, Komaeda, and his best friend, Nanami. They were both so dear to him, and every moment that he spent with them made him feel so much happier. At the same time, though, he often felt like he didn't really deserve to be around them.
As far as he and Komaeda had come from their rocky beginnings, Hajime could never forget how Komaeda had looked down on him at first for being in the Reserve course. Sure, they'd become friends regardless, but it still hurt to think about. As much as Komaeda would go on about how he wasn't good enough for Hajime, the truth was that he was the one who wasn't good enough for Komaeda. If he really wanted to be on equal footing with a Super High School Level such as Komaeda, then didn't he also need to have a talent? If this project did everything it promised to, Hajime wouldn't just have one talent, he would have all of them. Seeing as how Komaeda loved hope so much, then if Hajime became the personification of hope, he would finally be worthy of that admiration.
He wasn't sure what Nanami would think about all of this, though. She insisted that talent wasn't actually all that important, and she seemed to like him for who he was. But he felt like he was constantly reminded about how above him she and the other Super High School Levels were. That one girl in his class was also friends with someone in Nanami and Komaeda's class, and he heard the things that the other students said about her trying to be above her station. He wouldn't be surprised if people said the same things about him. If he wanted to be in their world, he needed to actually belong.
"Komaeda, what would you think of someone who has more than one talent?" Hajime asked his boyfriend one day.
"Someone with multiple talents? I wonder if such a thing is possible," Komaeda said. There was a light in his eyes that told Hajime that he was intrigued by the idea.
"Well, if it was possible, what would you think of that person?" Hajime pressed.
"If someone really did have multiple talents, then they would probably represent hope better than anyone else I've ever met! Of course, it's hard to picture someone who inspires hope better than Nanami-san," Komaeda answered with a laugh.
Hajime couldn't help but smile at the mention of his other closest friend. She never said as much to him, but from Komaeda, he learned how she had grown quite popular in her class. He was happy to know how much everyone admired her, though it did admittedly make him feel even more inferior. He still didn't get why someone as amazing as her would choose to hangout with him. He couldn't help but picture getting to join Komaeda and Nanami's class if he went through with the project. It would be so great to spend more time with both of them, and to actually feel like he belonged in their lives. He was tired of feeling useless and unworthy, and he truly did not know how much longer he could bear to live like this.
He would have to make a choice very soon, as impossible as it felt. Hajime could only hope that, whatever he decided, he would make the right choice.
Noiz: Wow it's been a minute hasn't it? I'm still trying to push through these one-shots though!
Prompts for week 8 were [Hapless] and [On the Clock].
This is set in the same AU as "Disclosure", "Alone", and Multiplayer", where KomaHina is a thing during their Hope's Peak days. I just wanted to get into Hinata's head and explore what he was thinking before going through with the Kamukura Project.
I've got one more one-shot in this AU for TSoS, which will focus on Kamukura. It's taking me some time to get through because I'm still trying to decide exactly how much I will change canon. I'll try to get it done soon though, along with my other one-shots for other fandoms!
Reminder to check out the other TSoS one-shots if you haven't already.