Content Warning: This story explores themes of suicide and mental health struggles.
Spoiler Warning: This story draws on information that is revealed in the Ghost Hunt anime, manga, and the original Evil Spirits light novels by Ono Fuyumi, including the sequel Akumu no sumu ie. It also draws on the Ghost Hunt short stories that have been translated by various writers, particularly His Reality, Confession for a White Crow, Eugene, and Genki.
While I don't think it's necessary to read all of these pieces to understand the story, I do think it makes for a better reading experience.
PROLOGUE
Once upon a time, there was a forest that rested on the northwest face of Mount Fuji. Surrounded by legends, Aokigahara became known over time as the Suicide Forest until the forest became something of a legend itself.
You see, the thing about stories is that they are lies. The best storytellers are also master liars, and I begin this story by freely admitting that. I don't particularly care if you believe that this story actually happened as I tell it.
A story might not have happened at all, but that doesn't make it any less true. I want you to feel what I felt, and I will tell you whatever I need to tell you in order for you to feel what it's like. Stories are for joining the past and the present. Stories are for eternity, when memories have been lost to time and there is nothing to remember except the story as it has been told over and over. Perhaps you'll learn something I never did.
You don't walk into the suicide forest without knowing why. When a person goes to die, they must have reasonable confidence in the imperative of their actions. It's a mistake that can't be fixed. Once you are dead, you can't become undead.
But, then again, this is a story. And in stories, the dead sometimes smile, open their eyes, and return to the world of the living.
One thing is for certain, however: this is a true suicide story, so I will warn you now. A true suicide story is never moral. It does not instruct nor give hope. It neither suggests what proper human behavior should be nor restrains people from doing the tragic things that people have always done.
If a suicide story feels moral, do not believe it. If you feel uplifted at the end of this story, or if you feel that some small bit of hope has been salvaged, then you are a victim of the ancient lie that we have any control in this life. To set the stage for this true suicide story, you must know that it is absolute and uncompromising in its allegiance to oblivion.
Just as you cannot un-pull a trigger, you also will not forget this story once you've begun reading it. I, of course, already survived, but that doesn't make it a happy ending. After all, you're never more alive than when you're almost dead.
Now, that's out of the way, so let's get on with it. Are you ready? Shall I begin?
Note: The rest of the story is subjective POV; alternating third person limited. This prologue was originally my ominous, lyrical way of giving a content warning. It won't come back until the epilogue. Although, you will meet this character at some point in the story! Don't let it be a turn off :)
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental illness, please know that you are not alone. You can always reach out to a family member, friend, teacher, counselor, or community member. In addition, below are some major hotlines and crisis resources. Please note that these lists are NOT exhaustive. In addition to phone hotlines, many of the resources also offer a text or chat option. Visit the websites for more information. Some resources offer 24/7 crisis support, while others provide information and referrals in non-crisis situations.
National Suicide Prevention Helpline: 1-800-273-8255 (TALK) or suicidepreventionlifeline dot org
List of International Suicide Prevention Hotlines: iasp dot info slash resources slash Crisis_Centres
Crisis Text Line: Text "HELLO" to 741-741 or crisistextline dot org
SAMHSA National Helpline: 1-800-662-4357 or samhsa dot gov slash find-help slash national-helpline
National Alliance on Mental Illness Information Line: 1-800-950-6264 (NAMI) or nami dot org slash help
More resources listed at archiveofourown dot org slash works slash 28536969 slash chapters slash 76930211.