Chapter One: Fox God
In ancient days, the Fourth Hokage had confronted the Nine-tailed Fox in single combat.
And from that cataclysmic confrontation, Naruto, the Fox God of the Leaf, had existed. Even now, he resided atop the Hokage monument, gazing down at the village in the morning.
Far below, Naruto watched the trees swaying in the air. And, eventually, Naruto lay back and stared at the clouds. "Ugh, this is so boring?
"I guess I could deconstruct the Hokage Monument again, but the Hokage would never accept it. The Old Man would kick me all over the place if I did that."
The Hokage was pretty much the only person who could keep Naruto in line, actually. Well, there had been that time the Uchiha had tried, but that hadn't worked out very well for them.
Himself, he was bored.
Naruto would love nothing more than to spread some mischief, but nobody had done anything to him in a long time. And he wasn't the kind of guy who went after people who hadn't done anything wrong?
"Maybe I could go scare some criminals?
"Nah."
However, as he lay there, Naruto sensed on the far side of the Leaf Hinata Hyuga trying to hide from bullies. He felt her emotions and knew she was scared and that the other children were picking on her. They liked the idea of terrorizing someone from such a powerful clan.
Peering through the leaves and trees, Naruto saw them around her.
"Um, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bump into you, I..." said Hinata.
"What, you're sorry?" asked one of them. "What's the matter? Aren't you one of those almighty Hyugas?"
"What's the matter, weakling? Are you going to cry?" asked another.
These boys were from the academy and some years older than Hinata. Hinata was about Naruto's age but didn't have godlike powers. Her dark hair was cut into a bowl cut. She was pressing a finger to her lips as if in prayer. Naruto could feel her terror, and he didn't like it. "No, I...
"Please, leave me alone!"
"Oh, what can't you gentle fist... us..." The boys trailed off and turned around. They were subconsciously picking up on the fact that Naruto was near them,
By the time they had, Naruto had fully materialized in front of them without a sound. As soon as they saw him, they screamed and backed off.
"Hi," said Naruto with a winning smile and a friendly demeanor.
"You... Naruto, we uh... we didn't know that you were out here," said one. "We ain't doing nothing, honest! Please! Please don't kill us!"
Naruto gave all three of them the sensation of being punched in the gut. It only took a flick of one of his nine-tails. Gasping, they fell to the grounds as he began to collect energy. The Old Man had told Naruto not to use his powers in the village, but they were in the forest right now.
"Get lost, you losers, and leave her alone," said Naruto.
They fled screaming into the village.
Naruto then took on his preferred form and kneeled down by Hinata. It was sort of the default form he took; he'd been born in this form. Hinata, though, was cowering and afraid. "I... I'm sorry, I didn't mean..."
Naruto clasped her by the shoulders and sent some chakra to warm her. "Hey, it's nothing to worry about. What's your name?"
"I'm Hinata," said the girl.
Naruto had known the name, of course. He knew everyone's name. But asking someone for their name was how you established a relationship. "I'm Naruto, Fox God of the Leaf."
Hinata's eyes widened. "You're the Fox God? That... that creature which was created when the Fourth Hokage and the Kyuubi killed one another?"
"The one and only," said Naruto, helping her up. "So uh, you got anywhere you need to be."
"Lady Hinata!" cried a voice, probably her servant who had been pretending not to see.
Out he came to meet her, and Naruto checked his mind. Yup, Hiashi had given orders to not interfere with bullying unless she was about to get hurt. Not that Hinata knew it. "Oh, Ko, this is Naruto-"
"Stay away from that creature, come on quickly!" said Ko, grabbing her by the hand.
Naruto felt a bit offended by this.
So offended that he spent the day mulling it over. Very few people were stupid enough to be outright disrespectful to him. Deconstructing someone who threw stones into their base molecular particles could do that. Although he had reconstructed them a moments later, obviously, no breaking the rules. But every now and then, someone slipped out the fact they hated him.
Naruto didn't think Ko had a leg to stand on. Maybe Hinata had run off, but Naruto had done more than him to help. Still, Ko had been afraid of Hiashi and had wanted to intervene, and he had a Caged Bird Seal on his head anyway. So maybe it wasn't really fair to hold it fully against him.
Even so, Naruto was annoyed now.
Very annoyed.
He'd hoped to talk with Hinata and learn more about her. Possibly even establish a bond with her, which could make her his. However, now she was off being lectured by someone other than Hiashi. Because God forbid the head of the Hyuga Clan acts like an actual father for once.
But, Naruto decided to try and go find her. He didn't have anything interesting to do anyway, so why not? So, moving through time and space, he came to the Hyuga Manner with a door shut.
Ah, a locked door. His old nemesis.
Naruto moved forward and knocked politely. He'd timed this so Ko would be the one to answer the door. This would be fun. The door opened, and Ko looked out to see Naruto made manifest.
"Yes?" asked Ko, not seeing him.
"Yeah, I'd like to speak with Hinata," said Naruto.
"I... there is something out there," said Ko. "I can't quite make it out..."
Naruto got even more annoyed at this point and manifested his tails. As he did, Ko backed away. "Yeah, Fox God of the Leaf. Open door. Now."
Ko screamed and shut the door before running off.
Naruto sensed him rushing to find Lord Hiashi and sat down to listen. "Seriously?
"Why is everyone here such a freak? Idiots."
"I... I think it was looking for Lady Hinata," said Ko.
"What?" said Hiashi. "Why? Ko, what is the meaning of this?"
"I... I was going through the forest, Lady Hinata had run off again and... and a number of bullies went after her," said Ko.
"Did you intervene?" asked Hiashi.
"No, Lord Hiashi, of course not," said Ko. "I... although it hurt me, I let them provoke her as you ordered. However, the Fox God appeared and scared them off.
"I know you wanted Lady Hinata to become stronger, but... I intervened to protect her. And now it is coming after her and is right outside our door."
"The Fox God was created when the 4th Hokage killed the Nine-tails, was it not?" asked someone else, possibly an elder. "Do we have any chance against it?"
"No one has been able to contain or stop it," said Hiashi. "However, it cannot enter any place it has not been invited. So long as Hinata remains here, she is safe."
"But Lady Hinata is your heir. She cannot stay here forever," said the Elder. Naruto wasn't bothering to remember his name at the moment; He'd never really known him.
Hiashi nodded. Naruto could tell by the change in the air currents. "Yes, you are right.
"The Fox God has never demanded human sacrifice before now. Usually, it focuses on Ramen Stands and other such places."
"Hey, I paid money to eat Ramen there!" shouted Naruto in frustration. "And I didn't counterfeit it either! I'm not a thief!"
"It's howling is intensifying," said the Elder. "We should act; otherwise, it may attempt to force an entrance. Or in its ravenous hunger devour those who dare to leave!"
"What are you talking about?!" said Naruto. "I can't kill! Period!"
"What can we do?" asked Ko.
"We cannot give my daughter up to it," said Hiashi. "However, we may be able to trick it into believing we have.
"Bring Neji and Hinata to me."
Wait, Neji?
Hmm, Naruto hadn't met him in this timeline. Oh, this could be good.
"You called for us, Father," said Hinata.
"Hinata, you must take off your cold weather jacket at once," said Hiashi.
"Um, yes, as you wish," said Hinata.
"Give it to Neji," said Hiashi.
"Um... why?" asked Hiashi.
Neji, however, was quite a bit smarter. "I am to be used for bait, then?"
"The purpose of the Branch Family is to serve the Main Family," said Hiashi. "You are Hinata's closest blood relation, and her jacket will disguise your scent.
"You must die so that the Main Family can live."
"You can't feed Neji to the Fox God!" said Hinata. "And well, I don't think that's what he um... wants anyway. He really seemed like he just wanted to talk."
"Absurd," said Hiashi. "Do not speak on matters you don't understand, Hinata. Neji put on the jacket."
"You're all idiots!" proclaimed Naruto.
"...Lord Hiashi, this will only make the Fox God angry," said Neji, who was moderate sane.
"What do you mean?" asked Hiashi.
"Well... it can see, can't it?" asked Neji. "I look nothing like Hinata."
"Actually, you share similar features. You need only adopt a different body posture," said Hiashi. They didn't share similar features, of course, but Hiashi was rationalizing his choice.
"Yes, but my hair is a completely different color, and my facial structure would give me away," said Neji. "Something would have to cover it. Also, that cold weather jacket was only bought yesterday by Koh to hide her bruises. Her scent hasn't had nearly enough time to rub off on it.
"Unless you intend to dress me in the wedding garments you put aside for that betrothal ceremony and...
"And I'm not helping my case at all?"
And that was how Neji Hyuga was thrust out of the Hyuga household, clad in a white wedding dress. There was a veil over his face, and he has carried a bouquet of flowers to hide his scent further. And his face was covered in all the right makeup. Also, his expression of horrified shame was a pretty good imitation of Hinata.
"Greetings, noble Fox God," said Neji, trying to change his voice. "I am... I am Hinata, and um... I wanted to thank you for earlier today..."
"Okay, that's a pretty good impression, but you're family are a bunch of freaks, Neji," said Naruto. Though he would admit, he did look pretty cute in a dress.
Of course, the knowledge that Neji had been found out made him even more ashamed. It was adorable. "...I know."
"Look, I'm not here to eat anyone," said Naruto. "I just was having a conversation with Hinata when that jerk Ko interrupted it. I was bored, so I came here."
"To what end?" asked Neji.
"I just want to see if she's alright," said Naruto. "I was talking with her earlier when I was pulled away. After that, she couldn't hear my voice. I want to speak with her and establish a bond."
Neji halted. "...You aren't what I was expecting."
"And what were you expecting?" muttered Naruto.
"I'm not sure, but your impersonation of a street urchin is... deceptive," said Neji.
"Yeah, I find people don't notice me so much when I'm like this," said Naruto. "It's also my default form, sort of. So uh... what's with the makeup?"
"Apparently, there was some speculation that you wanted Hinata as a bride," said Neji. "The symbols on my face are generally reserved for virgin sacrifices."
Naruto laughed. "...And they thought this would appease me?"
"I did tell them it was a foolish plan," said Neji.
"So does that mean you're my bride now?" asked Naruto.
"NO!" said Neji.
"Yeah, but you've got the symbols for virgin sacrifice. And you're decked out in the bride uniform," said Naruto. "And they did send you here as a sacrifice, so that does sort of qualify. I mean, are you saying you're not a virgin or what?"
"I assure you, I do not qualify," said Neji.
"So you have had sex?" asked Naruto.
Neji blushed even deeper and very much looked like a bride. "...No, but-"
"So you do count as a virgin sacrifice!" said Naruto.
"Just kill me, already!" said Neji.
"What?" said Naruto. "I can't kill you! And I wouldn't even if I could! In fact, I sort of love you, like I love Hinata. I'm just saying that Hiashi basically dressed you up for a wedding and handed you over to me. Sort of-"
"Just... don't," said Neji. "Don't.
"I am not homosexual."
Naruto changed shape, shifting into the shape of a female equivalent, posing seductively. "Eh, that's not a problem, Neji. This is basically the physical manifestation of my will; I can change it into whatever you want?
"So tell me what you want, Master."
Neji was actually super affected by it. Nobody could look at Naruto's sexy jutsu without it happening. But he did a remarkably good job of pretending to be annoyed and unimpressed. "...Charming.
"If there is nothing else, can I please go back inside? My reputation has already been destroyed enough for one day."
"Sure," said Naruto. "If you ask Hinata to come out." He could sense Hinata was watching through the walls and really wanted to come out. But no one was letting her.
"Even if I did that, Hiashi would refuse to let you," said Neji flatly. "In fact, I already suggested it. He thinks you intend to eat her."
"But you can vouch for me, can't you?" asked Naruto.
"It won't matter," said Neji.
Naruto shrugged. "Well, fine, how about you open that door and invite me in. Then I talk with Hinata I'll say I took control of your mind or something."
Neji shifted, looking very worried. "Can you do that?"
"I dunno," said Naruto. "Do you want me to?"
Neji shivered. "...Even if I thought Hiashi would believe that I still wouldn't. You're a godlike entity, and the Hyuga's only defense against you is the guest right. If you actually decided to kill everyone inside there, could anyone stop you?"
"Probably not," said Naruto. "But I can't kill people anyway, so the worst I could do is sleep with all the women.
"Why do you care? They practically fed you to me. Although, I actually do kind of like the idea of devouring your body piece by piece. Nonlethally." His smile chilled Neji, who looked suddenly more like a frightened rabbit than a caged bird.
Actually, Neji was really terrified, Naruto realized. He lacked the perspective to see that Naruto devouring him wouldn't be a bad thing. "Everyone in the world has a destiny that cannot be defied," his voice said, unsteadily. "Also, letting you go after my entire family would be worse than treason."
Naruto sighed. "You're really not going to let me in here, are you?"
"The laws of my family and my society demand I do everything in my power to defend the Main Branch," said Neji. "You can do what you want with me, but do not expect my cooperation or consent."
"Fine, whatever. Just go," said Naruto. "I'm not going to tear anyone's throat out without their consent. Just tell Hinata I'd like to speak with her when you get the chance."
Neji darted through the front door and slammed it behind him.
Naruto sighed as he perceived the future and watched Neji rapidly get back into his old clothes. And, of course, he said nothing of any sort to Hinata, and everyone just sort of pretended like it didn't happen.
But Naruto didn't care; he'd gotten the entertainment he was looking for. If Hinata had just come out and talked to him, that would have been great. But if this was how this family was going to react, he would definitely be visiting the Hyuga more often.