He had been moping around. He knew that. And he knew that Iris and Cilan had noticed quite a while ago that he was moping around. He knew that he was being very obvious about one of his rare off days, but he was way too tired at that point to care.
Leaning against the railing, he looked down at the world. The cold wind sapping away all of his body heat and stinging the skin of his face as it dried up his eyes, but he didn't move. Pikachu was a small heater in his lap, his partner and friend burrowed deep into his lap, using Ash's legs as a shield against the wind.
Pikachu didn't like that Ash was up there either, but he trusted his trainer to not do something as stupid as to fall off.
Absentmindedly rubbing Pikachu's fur in between his index and thumb, he let his aura light up his eyes with a gentle blue. Illuminating the world in a blueish tone, as everyone's smaller auras appeared far below him. Just tiny little blue dots roaming on the street as they returned home for the nights, or as they started their day.
Glancing over his shoulder, he was reassured when he saw Iris and Cilan still in their beds, their auras glowing gently in the night, not that they could see it.
A gust of wind made his body shiver, but he still didn't move.
He knew that if either one of his friends woke up and saw where he was sitting, they would either lose their shit, yank him to their side of the railing, or call the authorities on him and put him into a hospital for what could be understood as a suicide attempt, or suicidal ideation.
It wasn't his fault that the ledge was just so enticing to sit on, just to let his feet dangle hundreds of feet above the ground.
…ok maybe it was his fault.
But mind you, he was not suicidal. He had died once before, been there, done that, not fun. But after you die a few times, you are desensitized to the idea of death. And that only gets worse when you have had far too many friends die right in front of you, or when you weren't strong enough to save them.
Those stung more than anything. Sometimes he really wondered if he de-
Stop it. He told himself firmly. Lucario did not give up his life to save the world, and by extension, for him to be sulking and questioning his right to life.
Lucario gave himself up to save everyone, and the last thing he was going to do was not live life to the fullest.
Did it suck that Lucario died?
Yes, absolutely. It was horrible. It sucked every time he remembered, and it sucked when he pushed it to the back of his mind so the thought wouldn't ruin his day or week. He truly wished from the bottom of his heart that he could have lived and died a normal death.
But he wasn't going to let his sacrifice go to waste and sulk around.
Granted, on days such as these, it was a little bit difficult. Even more so because Iris either kept on scolding him on his sour mood, or Cilan would either ask him straight out what was wrong or would verbally insinuate that ash could trust him and confide in him.
Because Arcecus FORBID that Ash was in a bad mood.
He appreciated Cilan's concern, but it was starting to get annoying. And he was getting close to straight-up biting Iris's head off since all she did was call him a kid for sulking around for nothing. Like it was just him being a spoiled brat.
The beams of sunlight hitting his eyes made him come out of his thinking.
And instantly soured his mood since he would have to go inside to be awkward with his friends or risk getting caught sitting on the ledge of the building, about 11 floors away from falling to his death.
Great.
"Where are you going?"
And he was annoyed again.
Holding up the bucket, he answered gruffly with one word," Water."
That should have been enough to convey that he was going to the stream to get more water for the camp, especially since Cilan had said mere minutes before that someone was going to have to go and get more water.
"Don't get lost~ !" If his mother hadn't raised him better…
Grunting out a response and dismissively waving his hand, he walked away, barely blinking when Pikachu jumped onto his shoulder to come along.
"I think I'm two seconds away from strangling Iris Pikachu."
He couldn't understand Pikachu's words exactly, he wasn't skilled enough with his aura for him to do that, but he could understand the tone of his words if that made sense. And now, he was getting a tone of 'be patient' and 'It's too much trouble to hide a body' coming from his small friend.
That made a bark of laughter escape his lips. With a sigh, he said," Yeah, you're right, it would be way too much trouble to go and get Charizard for him to help."
Pikachu nuzzled against his neck, his tone giving off a feeling of,' Charizard is the ride or die friend.'
Chuckling, he agreed," Yeah, he really is huh? Man, I miss him."
They both stopped talking when Ash arrived at the stream, Pikachu being vigilant when Ash bent down and started to wash and fill up the bucket.
Pikachu was an excellent guard, always watching Ash's back while Ash kept an eye on his front.
Therefore, they didn't notice the bank crumbling away until it was too late.
Ash sat down in the river, his anger was barely restrained at that point," I'm going to lose my shit…I'm going to fucking lose my shit!" With a yell of frustration, he jumped out of the stream, a string of violent curses flowing out of his mouth in his native tongue.
Contrary to what everyone thinks, Ash was quite the curser. Only he cursed when he was alone, and in his native tongue so no one knew that he was really a foul-mouthed teenager when he was mad.
Wrenching off his jacket and shirt, he threw them over his shoulder, and he picked up the bucket that Pikachu had so kindly offered him the handle.
He grunted out thanks, but he let Pikachu know through aura just how thankful he was.
When he stomped into camp, he barely resisted the urge to throw the bucket onto the table as Iris and Cilan stared at his shirtless and sodden form," Here," He grunted out.
Cilian looked between the bucket he had just set down onto the table, and the sour teenager that was standing in front of him, "Ash!? Did you fall into the river?!"
A quick 'what do you think?' was on his tongue, but he swallowed the response, gritting out a yes as he stalked towards his bag.
"I knew I should have gone with you!" Iris said in a scolding tone, her hands on her hips. Even Axew was standing off to the side nervously, his instincts picking up on the enraged emotions that Ash was letting leak into his Aura," Leave it to you to get distracted and fall into the river like some child!"
He was planning to just throw on his shirt right then and there, but he was going to leave for his sanity and for some privacy," Not in the mood Iris. Leave me alone." His voice, despite the curtness, was calm but was able to convey his anger. Picking up his bag by the handle, he started to walk out of the camp.
"Don't walk away when I'm talking to you Ash! When are you going to understand that you need to grow up!"
He stopped in his tracks, all pretense of keeping a semi-annoyed look on his face leaving as he blatantly glared at her, through gritted teeth, he said," Stop treating me like I'm some stupid kid Iris. I mean it."
Iris glared back at him, her face in a childish pout that pissed him off even more," I will stop treating you like a kid when you stop acting like one!"
Ash believed in living with no regrets.
Iris yelped and arched back awkwardly when the bundle of wet clothes hit her right in the face, the impact making her fall onto her behind.
"Ash!" Cilan was almost horrified at the action, Ash was a gentle person, and that had to be the most violent act Ash had done against another human since they met," Why would you do that!" Cilan was quick to run over to iris to help her up, and when they both looked up at Ash to reprimand him, he was glaring down at them.
A shiver went down their spines.
"I told her to stop," The usual childish look that he had, the one that was always accompanied by that grin of his, was gone. His voice was as cold as an ice beam. It was a clear reminder that despite the fact that he was only 15 years old, he had traveled through multiple regions and has experienced trials and tribulations that were almost traumatizing," Learn to respect people Iris. You can get yourself in a lot of trouble if you don't." Turning on his heel, he left the two of them there, "I'll be back at dawn."
"Why him...!" Iris growled as if Ash was the one who was annoying and aggravating.
Cilan sighed
When they heard the underbrush rustling at dusk, they thought it was Ash coming back after he had finally calmed down. Iris puffed up and scowled heavily, and Cilan was already sighing in exasperation, preparing himself to separate the two teenagers.
But much to their surprise, it was a trio that they knew very well.
"Finally!" Jesse sighed in relief as she stumbled out of the underbrush," Found you guys!"
"Yeah!" James and Meowth stumbled out behind her, James holding a small box in his hands," Why are you guys so far off the route!?...What?"
They leapt to their feet, their hands going to their pokeballs," What do you want?!"
"Um," James said hesitantly before holding up the small box like it was an offering," We're here to give this to Ash? Where is he anyway? Don't tell me he forgot again."
Huh?
"…what?"
"What? Today is the anna-" Meowth was cut off as both Jesse and James slapped their hands over his mouth, a glare on their faces.
"Shut it Meowth, he probably didn't tell them either." The trainers picked up on the language that they knew was Ash's native tongue. And they stared intently at them.
Jesse was quick to wave them off," Don't worry about it, where's Ash?"
Their insistence for their youngest member made Iris huff and cross her arms as she looked away," Hmph, who care about that kid! He stormed off after throwing his clothes in my face."
"Iris," this time, it was Cilans turn to scold someone," Don't act like you didn't do anything. He asked you to stop and you didn't listen. Ash's patience still has its limits and let this be a good lesson for you. Respect the fact that you made him angry."
"Wait," James cut in, the look on his face was between concerned and slight fear," You made Ash mad and the only thing he did was throw his clothes at you?"
"His wet clothes." Iris emphasized heavily, still pouting at the scolding Cilan just gave her.
A shiver visibly went through all of them, they shook out their shoulders as they tried to get rid of it," You're lucky," James said, with an almost grave tone in his voice," It's hard to get him mad but he has a nasty temper once you do. But anyways!" Ignoring the way the teenagers were staring at them, James started to enter the underbrush again," We're gonna find Ash now! Have a nice night!"
"…Ash has a temper?"
"Here you are!"
With a slight glare, Satoshi looked down at the forest floor, expecting to see one of his traveling mates standing at the tree under him. Much to his joy, and the relief of the others, a smile spread across his face.
"Oh!" With no fear, Satoshi fell backward off of the branch, performing a small flip to land onto his feet," Gosh is it that day already?"
With a fond smile on her face, Musashi ruffled Satoshi's hair almost roughly, making him swat away her hand, " Obviously, here, your usual." At that, Kojirō handed over the small box that he had, making Satoshi rejoice.
"Yes!" He held the box over his head in victory, his sour mood dissipating, "Mom's special!"
"It's going to be a little bit soggy," Kojirō said with an apologetic smile," we had to freeze it so it could make it through the plane ride, but it was just made yesterday."
The grin that they got from the teenager was heartwarming. A drastic difference compared to the scowl that they had found him with.
Off to the side, Meowth and Pikachu were chattering excitedly, Meowth answering in Kantonian and Pikachu answering in his language.
"Also," Musashi interrupted a slight grimace on her face," Here, the reports for the past month, we put the important ones on top. But there's nothing that needs immediate attention." All childish notions left Satoshi's face as he took the reports. His brow slightly furrowing as he flipped through the papers.
Contrary to what everyone thinks, Satoshi worked closely with Team Rocket and was the guardian for most of the legendaries. There was a reason why Team Rocket 'caught' Pikachu at least once a month and in the turmoil, one of the members of his scouts would put the latest reports into his backpack for him to look at later. With their help, he was able to make sure that no one was putting the legendaries he had taken under his care were at risk of being discovered or captured.
It was their job to collect information from the regions he's previously traveled to, to be honest, he didn't even know how they did it but they always delivered and organized it before giving it to him.
There have only been a few occasions where he's had to send his pokemon to guard and deter people from discovering the legendaries, but it was vital work that Arceus had given him.
"How's my mother?"
"Good, healthy, the diner is going well. She wants you to call her."
Satoshi hummed in agreement as he flipped a paper around to look at the back," Got it, I'll call her when we get to the next city, remind me to call her Pikachu. And the Orange Islands?"
"No one has managed to get past the gym leaders so far. There is one kid that keeps on trying though."
"Think they can make it?"
Kojirō almost scoffed," No, not until he gets more experience." Satoshi nodded at that as he continued to flip through the papers.
"Any trouble with anything else?"
"You mean other than Officer Jenny arresting us?" Satoshi snorted, a small smile gracing his face.
"Hey, at least I answered on the second ring. You guys are lucky I was still at the pokemon center to even get the call."
Kojirō and Musashi shook their heads fondly," And, what about money?"
Musashi took a step back while shaking her head, waving her hands around to get her point across," Oh no, we're still good for a long time."
Satoshi paused at that and looked up at them, tilting his head to the side as he said," Are you sure? It won'-"
"We're fine!" Kojirō said loudly, before catching himself and repeating his words in a normal tone," We're fine Satoshi, you don't need to give us any more money."
Who knew that being the champion of the Orange Islands would generate a lot of money. Especially since he always gets a portion of the fee that trainers pay to challenge the gym leaders. (He's tried to reject it but apparently, he can't)
"Ok, if you say so."
"Ash!"
They all stopped at the sound of his name being shouted.
"Ash! Come back! It's dangerous at night!"
It was Cilan. Glancing at the horizon, he realized that in his brooding, the sun was a few minutes away from disappearing from the sky and leaving everything pitch black.
It did not go unnoticed that it was only Cilan who was screaming out his name.
"You should go back," Musashi said quietly, making Satoshi frown at her. She noticed his look and was quick to explain," Come on, how would you feel if one of your friends stormed off for the night, in a forest, in the middle of the bumfuck of nowhere?"
Had it been any other time, Satoshi would have laughed at the curse. Instead, he scowled and rolled his eyes," I told her to leave me alone, but no, she keeps on treating me like I'm some type of fucking child."
"Uh-" Satoshi glared at Kojirō, who was just about to point out the fact that he was a child," You know what I mean Kojirō, you know I am not normal and that my life is not normal."
"Ok, fair, but," Kojirō paused, quirking his head to the side as he spoke," They don't know that. And even if you're having problems with Iris, that doesn't mean you should scare the shit out of Cilan like this."
The scowl was still on his face, but he relaxed his defensive stance just a little bit. Huffing just like a teenager would, he crossed his arms," Fine, I'm going to lose my fucking mind if she keeps on doing that shit though."
"Cilan already talked to her about it, now go, before he finds us."
Sighing, Satoshi snapped his fingers, prompting Pikachu to jump onto his shoulder," Fine, same time next month?"
"Yep," giving a nod of acknowledgment, Satoshi started to walk into the forest, only stopping to look over his shoulder when they called out to him, "Satoshi?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm sure Lucario would be proud of you."
That made him stop.
He had almost forgotten that it was the anniversary of the sacrifice Lucario made.
He gave them a gentle smile," Thanks."
Waving goodbye, he entered the forest, walking closer to the sound of Cilan's voice.
There was a light bubbly feeling in his chest at those words.
He still had that sense of doubt in the back of his head, but he was sure that he was making Lucario proud.
He would never get a definite answer,
But that was enough for him.
"ASH!"
"I'm right here Cilan, calm down." Ash stepped out from behind the tree, with a small smile on his face. And the relief was almost palpable on Cilan's face.
"Ash!" He was certainly surprised when the older teenager nearly crashed into him, running his hands over Ash's shoulders nervously as he looked at Ash with a critical eye," Are you okay! Did Team Rocket do anything?!"
"Woah woah, I'm fine Cilan, they just wanted to give me this," He held up the box to make a point," It's their thing, they almost got me killed some years back and this is their apology." The lie rolled off his tongue smoothly.
"Oh, god you scared me," Cilan let his head droop down before he promptly used the grip on ash's shoulders to turn him around and push him towards the camp," Come on, you still need to apologize to Iris."
"Ah fuck me."
"What did you say?"
"Nothing."
Time to deal with an actual child.
Joy.
Actually, maybe it's going to go well.
He was closer to the camp than he thought because before he knew it, he was being shoved out into the open and into the eyesight of Iris.
"Ash!"
"Ugh fuck me."
He hated the way he could feel a teasing emotion in Pikachus aura.