A/N: Possible trigger warning: mentions of domestic abuse

His phone lights up while he's staring at the ceiling, not being able to fall asleep. His hand reaches for his cell on the nightstand and he blinks a few times to let his eyes get used to the bright light coming from the screen.

'Hey, you still up?' he reads from the pop-up notification and doesn't need to look at the name to know who it's from. He looks at the time - 1:16 am - and presses the call button.

'Hey, sorry did my text wake you?' Amanda's voice sounds through the speaker. It's slightly lower and hoarser than normally.

He smiles at the apologizing, yet relieved sound of her voice. 'No, you didn't, I wasn't able to fall asleep anyway.' He turns to his side and holds the phone to his other ear. 'And I guess you couldn't sleep either?'

She sighs audibly but doesn't reply.

'Amanda, what's wrong?'

'It's silly, I'm sorry I texted you.'

That statement worries him. He knows she's working a case that's hitting close to home. A family tragedy. Abusive father, submissive mother, and two teenage daughters in the house. They expect the oldest of the two girls, Jaimy, to be sexually assaulted by her father. The fourteen-year-old isn't admitting to anything but has told her best friend about it who in turn told her own parents, and obviously, that's how it ended up at SVU.

He knows that Amanda feels a close connection to the girl, coming from a similar background. She's also the one leading the investigation and being the one talking to the girl most, trying to win her trust and having her open up about what's happening at home.

Amanda had confided in him about the case, telling him about how frustrated she feels. Everyone on the squad knows that something bad has happened to the girl by the hand of her own father - a son of a bitch who acts like he's invincible - but as long as she, or someone else in her family, doesn't cooperate, there's nothing they can do.

He sits up straight, his back propped up against the headboard, ready to help. Ready to talk. Ready to listen. Ready to do anything to take away some of the weight that's pushing down on her shoulders. 'Hey, you don't have to apologize. I'm glad you texted. At least I no longer have to count the uneven patches of paint on the ceiling. The painters really did a crappy job the other day.' He tries to keep it light, knowing that pushing her into confiding in him about what's bothering her, will only achieve the opposite effect.

For a while, it stays eerily quiet on the other end of the line, and he's afraid that she has shut down completely. He hears the rustling of the bedsheets on the other end and wishes that he was there with her. That even if she decides not to talk, he could at least hold her.

'I'm having nightmares.'

The confession came so out of the blue, that he's taken aback by the suddenness of it. 'Ok,' he replies. 'You want to tell me about 'em, what they're about?'

She scrapes her throat before answering his question. 'It's all about the past. Things are coming back to me while I sleep. Memories of things that happened when we were kids, that I'd forgotten about.'

Memories she'd suppressed. He can read between the lines.

'And the fact is, Dominick…' she continues, 'I'd rather stay awake all night than dreaming about these things again.'

He'd seen her white, ghostlike face when she was visiting him or when he visited her. Had seen the dark circles underneath her eyes. He'd thought it had to do with the case. She's absolutely tenacious when it comes to cases like this and can't let it go. That's what he thought this was about. 'How long has this been going on?'

'For like a week or so,' she replied almost guiltily.

She had been working on this particular case for a week.

'I watch TV in bed and drink coffee to stay up. I guess it didn't work this time, as I just had another one, and didn't know what else to do than to text you.'

'Amanda…'

'No, you know what? It's really silly of me to be afraid of nightmares. Kids have nightmares, kids need to be comforted when they have a bad dream. Adults should be able to deal with it on their own. They should know it's not real and that the monsters from their dreams can't come out to chase them. Sorry, I shouldn't have texted you or bothered you with all of this.'

'Do you want me to come over?' The question comes just as a surprise to him as it must come to her.

'You mean…?'

'Yeah, why not? And before you start making up excuses why I shouldn't, I'm not one to argue with at this hour of the night.' He's pleasantly surprised when he hears the nervous chuckle on the other end.

'Hey.'

'Hey.'

She opens the door fully and he puts his phone away. He had promised to send her a text when he got to hers, as to not to wake the girls by the use of the doorbell.

She's dressed in a sports top and shorts and her hair is up in a messy bun. 'You didn't have to come all the way here.'

'Yeah, I should've,' he smiles. 'Come here.' He puts his overnight bag on the hallway floor and opens his arms invitingly.

She puts her arms around his back and her head against his chest.

He hears her sigh and feels her tense body relax in his arms.

They've spent nights together before. Ever since the non-wedding of Fin, he had been over at her place for more than pasta nights but this time he felt that she needed him more than ever.

'Why didn't you tell me?' he whispers in her ear as they're in her bed, her back against his stomach, and his head resting against her shoulder. Their bodies molded together as one.

She clasps onto his hand which is in front of her chest and she presses a kiss to his fingers. 'I didn't want to worry you, I know you've been busy with the Garcia case. Besides, it's really not that big of a deal.'

Amanda Rollins, always taking care of herself and others. Never needing anyone. Until she does. 'You watch TV and drink coffee to stay awake at night. You need to have the lights on at all times and haven't slept in a week. How is this not a big deal? How could you not tell me?'

She doesn't reply.

He realizes he's pushing too hard and presses his nose into her hair. 'I'm here now, okay? I just don't want you to have to go through this alone.' He feels the slight nod she gives him.

'There was this one time when my dad had hit my mom so hard that I had to take her to the ER. I had had only two driving lessons before that day, but I took my dad's keys when he was out cold from the booze and drove my mom to the hospital in his car, an hour's drive away. I remember hitting a trash can that was out on the street and being so worried that my dad would notice and punish me or my mom for it.' Her body tenses up again as she shares more of the memory. 'And then we had to wait for ages at the ER before my mom got help and she was bleeding from her nose and from her ear. I was so upset with her, so upset that she'd forced me to drive her all the way to the hospital, without a license. Upset with her, because I had almost crashed the car and would definitely be punished for it. And upset with her, because we had to leave Kim at home with my dad and who knows what he would do to her. Not for one moment, I felt any compassion for my mom, for what had happened to her. Not for one second. The whole situation just made me angry and I remember not talking to her for two weeks after the incident.'

The waterfall of words doesn't stop there and he listens to her intently. She lets him in on her childhood. On the memories that have turned into nightmares every time she closes her eyes and lets sleep get a hold of her. He gently squeezes her hand from time to time, encouraging her to go on, to tell him more, to let him carry some of the weight she's been dragging with her most of her life.

'When I talk to Jaimy, it feels like I'm looking in the mirror and see my teenage self being reflected in there. I remember when I was asked about my situation at home, at school, or whatever, I'd never tell. I always kept quiet or twisted events in a way that they didn't seem to be that bad. I was afraid of what would happen with Kim or with me if I told someone the truth about what was going on at home. Would they take us away, would they separate us? I'd read a lot about it then you know, about children being placed in homes or in foster care, going from one family to the next. Never having any place to call home. At least we had that. A home. Or something like that at least.' She takes a deep breath. 'That fear… I can see it in Jaimy's eyes. She's picking one evil over the other. Staying at home with her abusive father seems a better option to her than being placed somewhere else.' Her voice sounds harder now, more frustrated.

'Amanda, did your father ever…?'

'Touch me? Sexually abuse me?'

A chill runs down his spine when she says it out loud.

'No, he never did, not like that. He was more the kind of guy who'd hit you when he'd had too much to drink.'

He holds her closer to him as she clings onto his arms more firmly.

'If there's someone who can help that girl, it's you, Amanda.' He hears her snort in disbelief. 'No, I mean it. She's lucky to have you on her side.'

She turns around and now faces him.

He's glad she did because there's something else on his mind he needs her to hear. His face now mere inches from hers, he cups her chin and lets his thumb caress her cheek. 'Just remember that you're not that little girl anymore. You've come out stronger because of who you are. In fact, you are the strongest detective, the strongest mother, the strongest woman I know. And I'm happy to remind you of that once in a while, that's what I'm here for.'

Her eyes glisten and she presses her lips to his, holding them there for seconds, minutes, who knows? When she pulls back, she snuggles up against his chest and he wraps his arms around her. Their legs entangle and he lets his hand go up and down her arm until he hears her breathing slow down. Relief washes over him as he notices she's fast asleep. He can only hope that the nightmares won't torment her tonight, but at least he's here with her when she wakes up.

He kisses the crown of her head and allows himself to close his eyes, knowing that with Amanda in his arms, sleep will come easier to him too.